Your Guide to Sensate Therapy
Sensate therapy or sensate-focused therapy is a kind of sex therapy that makes use of touching exercises to help sexual partners get rid of any negative or anxious feelings they may have about being intimate. Additionally, this kind of therapy enhances sexual partner communication.
You might feel concerned if you and your partner have noticed you struggle with sexual intimacy and luckily, s ensate therapy can be exactly what you need to solve this issue. With this kind of treatment, you both may begin to determine what suits you better, what you like, and what you find exciting.
How does sensate therapy work? What results can you expect from it? We’ll address all of these questions and more in this guide.
What is Sensate Therapy?
Sensate therapy is a form of sex therapy that makes use of touching exercises to help sexual partners get rid of any negative or unease they may have about being intimate. Additionally, this kind of therapy enhances sexual partner communication.
It consists of a series of mindful touch activities that might help you feel less sexually anxious while also giving you the chance to discover your own and your partner’s bodies. With it, you can learn to get out of the mind and into the present by concentrating simply on how you feel, giving your body room to react in its natural way.
The couple will perform certain exercises during a few months, which are given by their sex therapist. The exercises are provided to them to complete at home, sometimes alone and sometimes with others. The pioneers of sexuality research, Dr.Willian Masters and Virginia Johnson, developed senate focus treatment in 1970.
The goal of the treatment they developed is to get rid of performance anxieties, which have a detrimental influence on intimacy in the bedroom. By letting go of concepts like anticipation or objectives, like anticipating an orgasm, both body and mind begin to unwind so that pleasure may flow unhindered.
Sensate therapy is a blend of sensate touch, mindfulness, and exposure therapy, which teaches you to link pleasant, calming sensations with touch, sex, and your partner.
The Five-Step Process
Sensate focus is a blend of sensate touch, mindfulness, and exposure therapy, which teaches you to link pleasant, calming sensations with touch, sex, and your partner.
1. Non-Genital Touching
During the sensitive concentration exercises, you both should be clean, relaxed, and undressed. If they can’t be nude, they should wear free-flowing, cozy garments. The initial step in the procedure is for the pair to decide who will touch and who will receive.
Halfway through this process, they will exchange places, allowing everyone to both give and receive touches. The toucher will touch the recipient anyplace on the body besides the breasts or genitalia while the recipient is lying down in a comfortable posture.
2. Genital & Breast Touching
The partners alternate between being the toucher and the receiver in the second phase, which has a similar fundamental format to the first. The toucher may, though, also touch their partner’s genitalia at this stage. However, since exploration rather than sexual arousal is still the main objective, the toucher shouldn’t spend more or less time on the genitalia than other areas of the body.
It is OK for one or both parties to grow excited throughout the procedure, yet once more, they must resist the urge to transform the interaction into a sexual encounter. The pair may also adopt a method known as “hand-riding” in step two, in which the receiver places their hand over the toucher’s hand and offers the toucher subtle nonverbal cues such as sometimes applying slightly more pressure. The receiver may sit between the toucher’s knees during this phase to enable this method. Once more, the couple will trade places after the predetermined time.
3. Adding Lotion or Lubricant
Step three is identical to step two with the addition of lubricant for any genital touching and lotion or baby oil for body touching. According to Masters and Johnson, “changing the medium of touch is one of the methods to enhance sensory awareness.” Avoid applying cold oil or lotion to the couple.
The toucher could do this by first warming the lotion in their palm before applying it to the recipient. Before beginning step three, the pair might, alternatively, reheat the entire lotion or oil container in a tub of warm water.
4. Mutual Touching
In the last phase, both partners are permitted to touch each other simultaneously. The couples should not touch one another with the aim or expectation of evoking sexual excitement, yet rather with the attitude of merely observing the sensations and feelings of contact, according to the same fundamental rules as in the previous three phases.
The couple may also touch one another with their lips and tongues at this stage, yet they should refrain from kissing and oral sex. By doing this, they prevent themselves from relapsing to previous sexual habits and allow themselves to experience new levels of pleasure and sensory enjoyment.
5. Sensual Intercourse
The phrase “sensual intercourse” was used as the title of the final phase of the sensate concentration with great meaning by Masters and Johnson. During the last phase, the couple is concentrating on gaining a higher level of touch awareness throughout this approach.
They do not want to go back to the occasionally mechanical, orgasm-driven character of sexual activity. As they come into contact once again, they can continue to practice mindfulness during pleasurable touch by focusing on the temperature, shape, and texture of their genitalia. Before participating in automatic thrusting patterns, they may slowly insert and remove fingers or the penis from the vagina multiple times. The couple could experiment with different breathing patterns to observe how the sensations are affected.
In Final Words
Sex therapists offer sensual focus treatment. You should start looking for a sex therapist if you and your partner are struggling with intimacy. Look for mental health professionals who have sex therapy as a subspecialty and experience with sensate therapy.
About Life Coaching and Therapy
Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!
Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.
Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.
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