low cost therapy

Low Cost Therapy Available Through Interns at Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT)

Low Cost Therapy Available Through Interns at Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT)

Low cost therapy sessions are available through our new interns that have joined the LCAT team starting in June 2022. 

 

Welcome Interns! 

Our internship program is starting with two fantastic interns from Southern Connecticut State University’s Marriage and Family Therapy program. We would like to welcome Melody and Mia to the LCAT family for hopefully many years to come. Please click here for their bios! 

I am really excited to announce this addition, as it offers us an opportunity to expand the practice, offer more lower cost sessions to the community, and provide an educational space and opportunity for new professionals in the field who are dedicated to the healing arts! It really feels like a win, win, win!

Both Mia and Melody are passionate about this work and are dedicated to facilitating sessions that promote healing and growth. Both hold interest in the LGBTQ community as well as making sure there are spaces for all people regardless of identity or barriers to accessing treatment. 

How does it work?

Our interns will be joining our team and working a small case load each week. Each intern will be supervised by myself, Nicole Scrivano, LMFT, or Amanda Pasciucco, LMFT, AASECT CST (LCAT owner) on a weekly basis. Supervision is where the intern directly reports to a licensed therapist on a weekly basis. 

Our interns have already been seeing clients in the field in other placements through their graduate program. Within all placements they are required to be supervised and observed prior to engaging in their internship placement. They join our team to start to focus on their area of interest and speciality. We are their final placement prior to achieving their masters degree in Marriage and Family Therapy. 

Supervision includes discussing cases on the intern’s caseload, various interventions and clinical tools to use, ways to help fine-tune and specialize clinical skills as well as reviewing and signing all clinical documentation. This ensures opportunities for the interns to experience more growth and development.

Both Amanda and I have worked with interns in the past and have been working at Life Coaching and Therapy, LLC since the beginning! We have been in the field for over 10 years and are so excited to utilize our expertise. And therapeutic models to advise a new generation of therapists in the field.. 

Amanda is an AASECT certified sex therapist who has nearlycompleted her PhD in Clinical Sexology. She has supervised both undergraduate, graduate, and licensed therapists and is an amazing therapist if I do say so myself. Amanda is an expert in trauma, sexuality, inner aspects, and non-violent communication. 

I am an LMFT who is certified in EMDR, DBT, and other modalities… all this is just a fancy way of saying I am trained in a variety of things to help people manage their symptoms. Before working at LCAT, I supervised a higher level of care at an agency (with staff of all levels of experience including interns). And have worked at LCAT as the supervisor of our other therapists. 

If you would like to learn more, please check out our bios.  

Why Work With An Intern? 

Clients benefit from sessions with an intern by getting a fresh perspective at a lower cost session. How often are you searching for therapists and think the fees are too much for you to afford? Intern sessions start as low as $40 for an hour (the typical cost of a copay!) and are not covered by insurance. We are committed to making therapy accessible to as many people as possible. And this is a way to accomplish that. 

Working with an intern also allows you to have the focus of two therapists. Through the supervision and frequency of communication between interns and their supervisors, you are also able to get perspectives from a licensed, experienced therapist as well. 

Interns are usually incredibly energized and committed to the work that they are doing. In my experience supervising interns in the past, they typically spend a lot of time trying to figure out ways that they can serve the community by utilizing the most current education in the field. 

As many of you know, outside of the cost, accessibility to therapy has been TOTALLY bonkers. Especially during the pandemic and so many therapists have a waitlist or are not available. We wanted to add more staff to our team (including interns) to help fill this gap and make therapy more accessible to everyone. 

Get Started!

If you are interested in working with one of our interns or have questions feel free to contact info@lcatllc.com

Our sliding scale starts at $40/session Our interns will be offering their services via both telehealth and in-person (at our West Hartford office). 

If you are interested in working with one of our interns or have questions about this new development at LCAT feel free to contact info@lcatllc.com

They will begin seeing clients in June so feel free to sign up for an appointment and get added to our waiting list! 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

low cost therapy

About Nicole Scrivano

Nicole is the director and a licensed therapist (LMFT) at LCAT. She has had working in this practice since 2017 when it became a group practice. Nicole loves this practice and what it means to be a therapist. She graduated from the University of Connecticut in 2013 with a Masters with a speciality in Marriage and Family Therapy.

 

Esther Perel

Esther Perel Discussion Group Joins Leveled Up Love for Relatefest

Esther Perel Discussion Group Joins Leveled Up Love for Relatefest

 

We are working together to create a new world where we have conscious & consensual relationships through the Esther Perel discussion group, Leveled Up Love, and Wedeepen. Coming together, these three communities created a weekend of workshops for people endlessly curious about relationships. 

Esther Perel 

Esther Perel

Esther perel shows us that there is a problem with the way we are doing relationships. Even some of my clients tell me that “Mating in Captivity” feels hopeless. I felt the same way when I was first introduced to it in 2013, so as a sex therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist, I went on a quest on how to create conscious and ideal relationships.

What I found through Francesca Gentille would change my life. What I honed in on through compassionate / nonviolent communication was pivotal. Taking the needs inventory and hearing the concise Tony Robbins version was also helpful. Knowing that certainty, Uncertainty, significance, communication, growth, and contribution. These needs actually were one of the first things I bonded with Shai Fishman about. 

Leveled Up Love

 

Shai Fishman and Lea Aeolli of Leveled Up Love are creating a new paradigm on relationship lifestyle choices. Going over what they have learned and spreading helpful information is something that the non monogamous world desperately needs. I am so proud they showed up and that I have had the honor of working alongside them. 

When I heard that Shai and Leah Marshall run another Facebook group for those who discuss Esther Perel, I knew this event would be of particular interest to me. 

Joining up with Christina Weber of Wedeepen synched it all together. Thanks Christina for leading my husband and I through a beautiful ecstatic dance morning. We felt so held by your leadership. 

At the relatefest event, we entered and created a container of the new paradigm. Creating relationships based on new principles will create a new world. My husband and I performed and did a tie along rope bondage demo to the audience. 

Esther PerelNew Paradigm Vision 

For example, when we say that no one is entitled in an adult relationship… that no one is entitled to time, money, partnered sex, or emotions – we begin to build a new world. We create a world that is unlike what Esther Perel warns of in Mating in Captivity. Creating a world where partners are not even entitled to hold space for one another, yet GET to listen to their partner because they want to create new levels of intimacy. That depth is one of the most important concepts that we continue to learn over and over as we are creating conscious relationships. 

Every interaction can become a conscious negotiation between functional adults. If you are able to give yourself space to be reactive with emotions, yet not entitled towards sharing those emotions in the heat of the moment with the person you feel emotional about, you are an empowered and functional, conscious adult. 

Esther Perel’s mission and the mission of our work is ongoing growth & consent on all levels. If we think about our emotions, they have powerful messages for the US. The reality is no one else has the right to our feelings – we share them with consent. When we do this, it begins to even out the playing field between all genders. 

If you curate your life to practice this, then you can call in others who are owning their emotions, owning their inner work, and in their healing process. Even when you feel lonely, we practice holding space for someone where we can model healthy and divine sacred relationships – both in darkness and light. 

Esther Perel

Check Out All Our Additional Therapy Video

Sensual Meditation: Strategies to Fall in Lust Again

Sensual Meditation: Strategies to Fall in Lust Again

Tantric Sex Best Practices: Breathing, Desire & Arousal

Couples Communication and Love Language Strategies

Love-Language-and-Communication-Strategies

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT). And an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

Covid-19

Therapy in the Age of Covid-19

Therapy in the Age of Covid-19

 

Here at Life Coaching and Therapy, LLC (LCAT) we have practiced telemedicine to support emotional and relational healing . LCAT has utilized this non-traditional technique before the pandemic and were able to make the transition to predominately telemedicine seamlessly. 

Telemedicine (teletherapy or telehealth) is virtual therapy most commonly phone or video sessions (as this is what is currently covered by most insurances… especially during COVID). Texting therapy is another modality used but not covered in most insurance plans. 

 

Teletherapy in COVID-19

Covid has reshaped the world. There is a lot of suffering, a lot of fear, a lot of loss, and a lot of frustration. In addition to the challenging emotions in all of this, there have been changes in the way the healthcare field that have allowed for varying accessibility to support the safety and health of patients and their practitioners.

Many of my clients have had worries about telemedicine prior to COVID, but during this pandemic have begun utilizing and have found it to be better than they expected. Some cite it’s convenience while others identify it not “feeling much different.” 

As a therapist, I have enjoyed being able to be in people’s environments with them and utilize technology to intervene differently than I could in the past. In my opinion in some cases, it has made a cognitive shift to make those connections within their homes. In my practice, I have been able to utilize telemedicine to share screens, have clients sit in different rooms on different devices, show me their environments to come up with reasonable solutions, utilize EMDR, completing tasks together rather than making plans to do them, and workbooks. Clients have in many cases reported enjoying this more and finding it more effective. 

The ability to utilize these different interventions in technology have allowed for further connections between couples, families, and individuals. Challenging couples and families to have difficult conversations and face differing realities – allowing for an opportunity for relationships to find new strategies to meet the needs. Telehealth has allowed for closer connections to be fostered in all of the difficulty that is in our world right now. 

Sometimes that has allowed relationships to also see what is not possible and making conscious and intentional decisions to end the relationship (“conscious uncoupling”). This conscious decision allows for relationships to work amicably at collaborating to end a relationship. Telemedicine allows for these opportunities to work through this with more emotional safety and coaching around communication. 

 

Come to LCAT

Although telemedicine is not for everyone it can provide new opportunities for emotional and relational healing. Video, text, and phone therapy can be just what people may need if they are feeling stuck and have not found traditional models helpful. 

At LCAT each of our staff has been doing these modalities from the start. If you are interested in working on emotional healing through telehealth we are here for you, we take some insurances and offer sliding scales as well. Please check insurance plans to see what is covered under your plan. 

We are continuing to offer telehealth services to support the safety of our patients, staff, and community. Please contact us for more information!

YouTube page where she provides free information at The Sex Healer

If you know someone that would benefit from this information, feel free to share it. 

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. For clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized coaching on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Call or text us at 203-733-9600 or make an appointment.

veterans

How is the pandemic affecting Veterans with PTSD and family members

How is the pandemic affecting Veterans with PTSD and family members

 

22+ Veterans Die Daily! (This was before COVID-19)!

Amanda Pasciucco, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist specializing in trauma, and her stepfather, Special Forces Veteran Chuck Eggen to discuss the weakness of the Veteran Health Care system.

In my experience, the VETERANS ADMINISTRATION is full of GREED and promotes a traumatic response outward to our heroes… our Veterans! The VA represents what happens when a system breakdowns… and those outward effects.

We have a generation of Veterans with PTSD.

Watch the broadcast to understand more about why we believe the VA is responsible for the lives of more than 22 Veterans a day!

The VETERANS ADMINISTRATION is about to kill MORE than 22 Veterans a day! The system is broken.

Unleashing this via Facebook Live this week, as it is MY duty because #familyfirst! I am a sex therapist, family therapist, and community care defender!

As a PTSD and systemic therapist, I have 10 years of experience with abusive system. #Veterans will die if the VA breaks their continued coverage of care.

They are NOT watching out for our vulnerable populations.

They are not watching out for providers and the community.

The VA passes off the handling of payments for MEDICAL and BEHAVIORAL HEALTHCARE.

PTSD therapists are available in the community!!! Let us see the Veterans.

Let Triwest continue to manage current provider payments in New England.

New VA Community Care Network (CCN) Program

VA Community Care Network (CCN) Builds On PC3 Program for the Future

You can get more free content on relationship and sex tips by checking out my Youtube Channel – The Sex Healer

If you know someone that would benefit from this information, feel free to share it. 

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. For clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized coaching on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Call or text us at 203-733-9600 or make an appointment.

social distancing

3 PRUDENT STEPS TO SOCIAL DISTANCING

3 PRUDENT STEPS TO SOCIAL DISTANCING

[during the COVID-19 Pandemic]

 

We are facing hard times and we have been asked to take refuge within our homes, distancing ourselves socially to prevent more possible contagions in this COVID-19 pandemic.

So, in this video I explain 3 prudent steps for social distancing to cope with this quarantine in the best possible way.

Amanda Pasciucco, an AASECT certified sex therapist and owner of Life Coaching and Therapy, shares her tips to success! Watch now! Amanda has been featured multiple times on CNN, PornHub, Men’s Health, Hartford Courant, Playboy, Maxim, Daily Mail, HeadSpace, and more!

Check MORE videos:

Online Therapy for Couples or Individuals- Life Coaching and Therapy

Text Therapy – A New Therapy Method

Sensate Focus Therapy for Couples

 

GET THE PLEASURE PRACTICE E-GUIDE  & HOW TO SEDUCE YOUR SPOUSE VIDEO!

https://lifecoachingandtherapy.com/ ←HERE

-Learn How to Unleash Your Self Pleasure and Transform Your Sex Life!-

 

NEW VIDEOS EVERY WEDNESDAY AT 9 PM EST

 

You can get more free content on relationship and sex tips by checking out my Youtube Channel – The Sex Healer

 

If you know someone that would benefit from this information, feel free to share it. 

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. For clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized coaching on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Call or text us at 203-733-9600 or make an appointment.

coronavirus

Coronavirus and Text Therapy

Coronavirus and Text Therapy

 

Whatever you do, don’t panic. That was easy to say when Coronavirus was a problem other countries far away were dealing with, but it’s still true even today. Now that major sporting events are canceled and celebrities are posting that they’ve contracted the virus, everyone’s scratching their head about how concerned we should all be.

We’ve received a lot of inquiries about how the Coronavirus outbreak is going to affect counseling sessions and the way we interact with our clients. For sure, the response to the pandemic is going to alter all of us in the coming months.

CoronavirusWhat we do now to prepare will help us manage any turbulence ahead. How we manage our jobs, whether we can manage text therapy with our counselors, and maintain relationships with so much stress will be a challenge. As always, having a plan will help build certainty when it’s so hard to find in other places.

 

Relinquish Control of What You Cannot Change

This mantra has applications in responding to a Coronavirus outbreak and life in general. So many of us, clients and even therapists struggle to accept that change is part of being human.

We all can plan for something for years, however, when something crazy happens it’s rarely what we imagined. This is a great example right now. If you’d asked people a month ago what would send people running to the grocery store to stock up on toilet paper, they may have said something like a terrorist attack or some type of armed conflict. There was nothing like a pandemic on the horizon.

Coronavirus

Change happens fast, with medical issues, relationships, self-development, and many other areas of our lives. The sooner we accept that the less of a rippling effect change will have on us.

 

Build Contingency Plans for a Coronavirus Outbreak

Freezing economic and social activity is a massive challenge. If you think about it, we all have different tolerances for what’s acceptable. You might be ok with spending a week staying at home with your kids out of school trying to get some work done. But what about a month or three months? What if this thing is still going after six months?

Coronavirus

At some point, there’s only so much we can take. Maybe after struggling through some conference calls with kids screaming in the background, you’re willing to take your chances on the subway again. That’s obviously a joke, but the point is that perspective matters.

With so much out of our control, we have to try and control what we can. Creating a contingency plan for how you’re going to manage life in a new environment like the one Coronavirus is currently imposing on us is a good start.

List out the things you do regularly. What are you doing in person that can be done virtually? What are the “optional” activities that you participate in that can be postponed? If you can’t go in person, is meeting remotely even an option?

Getting a grip on what’s a “must” and what are the “maybes” will help you manage the chaos if it deepens.

 

Prepare What You Can

Ask your therapist if they offer remote therapy sessions. A lot of practices give video therapy sessions that provide a good alternative when meeting physically isn’t feasible.

We, and some other therapists, also give clients the option to practice what’s called text therapy. With text therapy, you get to engage with your therapist is a more casual form via text message. Conversations, due to the time it takes to type, aren’t as long or as in-depth, but there are some definite benefits.

Here are some of the positives of text therapy:

Text When You’re in the Moment:

How many times have you thought something or come across a situation and thought, “Ooh, I need to talk about this with my therapist!”, only to forget what happened because your next appointment is a week away?

With text therapy, you can shoot a message to your therapist in real-time. You can list your emotions, what triggered the scenario, and reflect on how things went after the fact. Your therapist will see you as you’re raw in the situation. Some great breakthroughs can emerge as a result.

 

Group Chats are Easy on Schedules:

It’s hard, especially when you’re in therapy with a spouse or partner, to get everyone’s schedules aligned. Text therapy is a great alternative because you all can engage and respond when you’re free. There’s always a written record of the conversation to go back over if you’re in the middle of something. There isn’t anymore, “Do you remember when you said…?”

 

Therapy from a Distance:

You don’t need to be in the same room with your therapist. Even if you aren’t locked in your room waiting for Coronavirus to recede, you can get help and talk things over. You might be on a business trip or a vacation and need to run something by your therapist. It’s a great way to keep a constant flow of communication.

 

Give Text Therapy a Dry Run

There’s no harm giving text therapy a dry run to see if it’s for you before something like social distancing is encouraged or even mandated. Ask your therapist if you can give it a try and see how you feel and respond to the new way of communicating.

coronavirus

A lot of people are surprised to find that they’re more introspective when they have to type down their feelings. When we’re in person, there’s a beauty to the free flow of words streaming from our subconscious. However, having to take the time to write down our thoughts can also be beneficial because it captures how we truly feel.

We should all be grateful that technology has come so far in recent years to give us the option to work from home, find out what’s happening quickly, and even text with our therapists if necessary. Generations ago, who knows what kind of impact the Coronavirus outbreak would have had when staying home for weeks wasn’t an option for so many people.

Text therapy is a fantastic tool that can help you get the counseling and encouragement you need even when life throws a major curveball that’s out of your control.

You can get more free content on relationship and sex tips by checking out my Youtube Channel – The Sex Healer

If you know someone that would benefit from this information, feel free to share it. 

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. For clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized coaching on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Call or text us at 203-733-9600 or make an appointment.

Remove term: behavioral teleheath behavioral teleheath

Behavioral Telehealth

Behavioral Telehealth

I was so excited to see this article below on the future of therapy in MedCityNews.com. We have already been offering secure video chat and text therapy for several months. Online therapy is great for patients who need convenient and intensive therapy options. Additionally, patients can quickly reference discussions since the the conversations are recorded. Millennials, who do everything on their phones, really like the idea of telehealth.

Telehealth’s emergence as the initial gateway into behavioral health services

By LINDSAY HENDERSON

While in-person visits with mental health providers won’t go away anytime soon, behavioral telehealth is expected to surge. This is due to younger patients seeking convenient ways to engage with a provider to address mental health problems.

behavioral telehealth

The escalating shortage of behavioral health providers couldn’t have come at a worse time especially for millennials.

Rates of major depression rates soared 31 percent among millennials from 2014 to 2017, according to The Health of Millennials report, also noted increases in substance-use disorders among millennials.

There is a silver lining to the mental health provider shortage, which could positively impact millennials and future healthcare delivery. More patients in the 35-and-under demographic are now using telehealth — or interested in using telehealth — to meet their behavioral health needs.

Forty percent of individuals born between 1981 and 1996 who answered a recent survey said they would regularly use telehealth for behavioral health management. This is higher than any other demographic. Also, millennials are nearly three times as likely to have had a video visit with a doctor compared with other demographics.

If this trend continues, telehealth’s role as a gateway into behavioral health therapy will only deepen. This suggests that there may come a day when the majority of behavioral health encounters are over a virtual connection.

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. For clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized coaching on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Call or text us at 203-733-9600 or make an appointment.

 

 

 

 

Break Up With Someone During The Holidays

How To Break Up With Someone During The Holidays, According To Experts

How To Break Up With Someone During The Holidays, According To Experts

 

By CAROLYN STEBER from bustle.com

While it’s never easy to end a relationship, it can be particularly difficult to break up with someone during the holidays. It’s only natural to think you’ll celebrate with your partner, give gifts, visit family, and spend the season side by side. So the idea of pulling the plug on all that, right when expectations are high, can be tricky.

And yet sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. If a relationship isn’t working, it’s OK to end it even though the holidays are right around the corner. It can even be kind, in a way, not to lead a partner on through the festivities, only to break up them in the new year. Instead, focus on ways to make the break up less terrible, find the right time, and then do it.

Following the time-tested bandage method, where you rip it off (or end the relationship) quickly, is usually the least painful option. “If you’re going to break up with someone, be direct about it,” Jonathan Bennett, a relationship and dating expert at Double Trust Dating, tells Bustle. “The holidays are stressful enough and your partner doesn’t need the extra drama of ghosting, slow fading, or anything else except a clean breakup.”

It may be tempting to ignore texts or bail on holiday parties as a way of slowly stepping out of a relationship, but being straightforward is best. And don’t wait until the last minute, either. “The longer you wait to end it, the more you’ll disrupt everyone’s holiday schedule,” Bennett says. It’s going to throw your partner through a loop, but even more so if they don’t have time to make other plans.

Shutterstock

 

Depending on the length and intensity of your relationship, the breakup could be as easy as that. But if you’ve been committed for years, be prepared to do more work. “We get into relationships with respect and love,” Amanda Pasciucco, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist, tells Bustle. “We ought to end them with respect and love towards the partner we say we have loved.”

This might mean going to couples therapy before calling things off. “Send an email, handwrite a letter, or have a face-to-face conversation (or multiple conversations) stating you are not happy and that you want to see a therapist before immediately breaking up with someone,” Pasciucco says. On the one hand, you may begin to overcome your differences. Or, it could be the last olive branch you need to extend before officially parting ways.

From there, end the relationship as you would any other time of year. “Be honest. Own your part. Stay respectful […] Treat them the way you would like to be treated,” Christine Scott-Hudson, MA, MFT, ATR, a licensed psychotherapist, tells Bustle. “And finally, apologize for anything you may have said or done that was hurtful. And tell them they are lovable and deserving of a healthy relationship in the future.”

Once you’ve broken up try to take good care of yourself, especially as you head out to gatherings and dinners. “It is difficult to breakup before the holidays because of shame, fear […] and what others will think of you both,” Pasciucco says. You might not want to face your family or have to explain why your partner isn’t present, but keep in mind why it needed to end and don’t let anyone make you feel bad about the timing.

“Breaking up is always difficult and there is no good time to do it,” Bennett says. “If the relationship is truly over, then you don’t have to feel guilty ending it over the holidays.” Instead, rest assured you ended well, and try to move on from there.

Experts:

Jonathan Bennett, a relationship and dating expert at Double Trust Dating

Amanda Pasciucco, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist

Christine Scott-Hudson, MA, MFT, ATR, a licensed psychotherapist

 You can get more free content on relationship and sex tips by checking out my Youtube Channel – The Sex Healer.

  If you know someone that would benefit from this information, feel free to share it.

Amanda Pasciucco Signature

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists!

 Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

 LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. For clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized coaching on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

 Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

 Call or text us at 203-733-9600 or make an appointment.

Sex and Intimacy Workshops

Sex and Intimacy Workshops

Sex and Intimacy Workshops for Couples and Singles

Finally…sex and intimacy workshops for couples and singles are being held in September. Two workshops will be held at Middletown and Rocky Hill, CT locations.

There are several components to having a healthy relationship with ourselves and others, and amazing sex is one factor.

Across the genders, everyone wants and craves sex and intimacy. Whether we are married or single or in some unclassifiable state in between.

According to multiple studies, sex boosts happiness, because it makes people feel more satisfied with their significant other and with their selves.

If your sex life has fizzled out and you’re having trouble getting it back on track, you and your partner might consider attending our Sex and Intimacy Workshops. Additionally, talking with a Certificated Sex Coach is another option if you prefer on-site sessions, text or video chat therapy.

My colleague, Dr. Sara Frawley, and I will present two workshops in September about dating, cultural shame, codependency, self love, and the Erotic Anatomy

Sex and Intimacy Workshops:

For Singles – The Sex Ed You Never Got in High School

Join us to get a refresher course on erogenous anatomy, discuss applying a Zen philosophy to dating, and explore different aspects of human sexuality. 

Date/Time: Wednesday, September 18th at 6:30 p.m

Location: Middlesex Community College (Chapman Hall Room 808), 100 Training Hill Rd, Middletown, CT

Cost:  $30 each

Register at Eventbrite

For Couples – The Sex Ed You Never Got in High School 

Join us to explore those burning relationship questions and take your relationship to the next level. 

Date/Time:  Sunday, September 22nd at 2:30 p.m

Location: The Barre CT, 412 Cromwell Ave., Rocky Hill, CT

Cost:  $35 per couple

Register at Eventbrite

Facebook Event

Tickets include light refreshments, Kava Kava ‘cocktails’ and all the supplies needed for a great class. For more information please call Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) at (203) 293-7293 or email us at: info@lcatllc.com 

 

About the Sex and Intimacy Webinar Educators

Sara B. Frawley

Sara B. Frawley

Sara B. Frawley is a Naturopathic Doctor (ND), a chemist, and a human biology professor. Dr. Frawley is the owner of Ground Force Medicine in Wallingford and Cromwell, CT, as well as the founder of Ground Force Supplements.

Amanda Pasciucco

Sex and Intimacy Workshops

Amanda Pasciucco is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and has certification as a Sex Therapist from the American Association of Sexuality Educators Counselors & Therapists (AASECT). She is a national sexuality educator, and the practice owner of Life Coaching and Therapy in West Hartford, CT.

 

Few of us know everything about sex, however, here’s your chance to learn more.

Please join Sara B. Frawley, ND and Amanda Pasciucco, LMFT at these two amazing Sex and Intimacy Workshops.

 

Amanda Pasciucco

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. For clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized coaching on YOUR terms, learn more about our Couples Cure text therapy program.

If you know someone who would benefit from sex, intimacy and relationship knowledge, feel free to send them a link to Amanda’s YouTube channel – The Sex Healer

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your relationship and ignite your sex life at What We Do. Call or text us at 203-733-9600, or make an appointment.

Open Relationships

Open Relationship – Get Ready, Get Set, Go For It!

 Open Relationship – Get Ready, Get Set, Go For It!

 

I’m excited to announce that I did an interview last Monday with The New York Times on open relationship trends! (I will post the article once it is published.)

I am beyond excited to be one of the millennial pioneers revolutionizing how we embrace all types of sexual and romantic relationships! 

As many of you may know from my article on polyamory, times are changing and monogamy is not the only style of relationship that couples are considering. 

According to a study in 2017, it is estimated that about one in five people have been in a consensually non-monogamous relationship at some point in their life. That is over 20% of Americans! 

With our changing times, I expect that number to keep rising. 

Open RelationshipSCORE CARD. We are only using A’s for results! 

  • If you scored 0 A’s – Go out and find a willing partner! Maybe your partner isn’t ready, then you have a choice to make on whether or not you wait for them to get ready or not. 
  • If you scored 1 – 3 A’s – a few tweaks is all you need. You may not realize it, but you may have a compulsive avoidance, anxious attachment, or you may be wanting to use an open relationship as a way to get “high” to take away the pain of something else. 
  • If you scored 4 or more on the left side A column, I do NOT suggest you go into an open relationship at this time. These statements can OFTEN be signs that you are not emotionally intelligent enough to understand your own needs. You may not know how to do your own inner work yet. You may get incredibly confused, because you are projecting fantasies onto others.

Common Pitfalls in Open Relationships

  • Lack of Honesty and Trust Issues
  • Inability to See One’s Addiction / Trauma 
  • Self-Centeredness
  • Communication Issues
  • Jealousy, Envy, and Insecurity
  • Family Conflicts (who do you do holidays with?)
  • Overcoming Social Norms (what happens when you only get a plus 1 to the wedding?)
  • Limitation of Partners (you can’t find anyone and your partner already has someone)
  • And More! 

Healthy relationships take TWO or MORE people who have integrity, honesty, creativity, willingness to be vulnerable, and ability to engage in their own Inner Growth and Non-Defensiveness. Sometimes a Sex Coach is needed to understand these changes and address them in the right direction.

Before you transition from monogamy to polyamory in a current partnership, make sure you understand the story each of you will have about a shared meaning when it comes to sex and love with other people. 

Sometimes we project shame from our sexual past into our sexual future with our monogamous partners. For example, you may become annoyed that your partner is frequently insecure about their body (their penis is too small or their vulva is ugly). This is usually an indicator that you have some blind spots to work on prior to adding another person to your sexual and loving relationship. 

You cannot directly fix your partner’s insecurity.

You can only change the system of how you respond to the stimulus of your “partner’s insecurity.” 

So if you are capable of fixing your own issues within your partner’s problems, then you may be ready for an open relationship!  

Below are strategic considerations for those participating in an open relationship: 

Open Relationships

Time is a Limited Resource

Love is not limited. Time is though. No matter what, every single one of us only has 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. 

In practice, your time allocation could be that you make four hours for each partner per week without phones. You could also attend an event with one partner one week, and then another event with another partner the week after. 

Sexual Education 

You have to understand safe sex due to the sexual-health considerations of open relationships. 

You are ready for an open relationship from a sexual education standpoint if you have:

  • The ability to fully discuss sexually transmitted infection status (for example: herpes type 1 vs type 2, hpv, PReP status)
  • Prepared to discuss in detail the act of Fluid Bonding (defined as a safer-sex strategy in which committed partners agree to have unprotected sex only with one another and to use barriers and/or stick to low-risk sexual behaviors with all of their other partners). 
  • The grace of how to discuss what is sexually sacred, and what are the sexual boundaries with both your new partner and your metamour (your partner’s partner). Because NOTHING is private anymore when you are polyamorous. You are part of one big happy family! 
  • Understanding of the term “New Relationship Energy (NRE)”.It is the intense feelings that may accompany the “honeymoon” phase of a new connection. This is sometimes also called “limerence.” You must check yourself while falling in love with the new person and remind yourself “this is not real, these are hormones.” Phenylethylamine, oxytocin, and vasopressin are the same hormones that you also find in serial monogamists or those practicing tantra. 

Communication Strategies

  1. Right Timing 

Implement email instead of texting when it comes to communicating important topics. It is too much to receive alarming text messages in the middle of a thread of memes. Here is an example email:

Open RelationshipsThe goal is that you learn how to ask consent while stating your needs. 

Once you get to that conversation, set a timer for 30 minutes! Make sure to disengage electronics! Do not discuss it ahead of time. Show them that you can practice patience. 

If you cannot wait 5-7 days to discuss your needs, you are not ready to be in an open relationship. In the variety of open relationships that I have tried, I find that it is mostly about waiting for someone. I had to remain centered while listening to things that I didn’t want to hear without getting triggered or responding. Then, I had to reflect back what I thought I heard to the best of my ability. If I was told “that wasn’t it” then I had to start over.

It takes a ton of patience and willingness to communicate effectively. 

2. Use A Compassionate Tone

Watch your tone intention in the beginning of all emails. “I mean this with loving eyes” or “I know you are improving and I still have another request based on my need to connect.” 

Notice the difference between “you let me down and broke a promise again” and “a part of me is hurt and feels let down by you breaking our commitment.” 

3. Observation Without Attitude

Example: saying “I noticed you left the plate in the sink. Did that mean anything to you?” sounds different than “it is so annoying when you leave your plate in the sink.”

A good way to practice polyamory is to ensure that EVERYONE in the partnership / poly family is mindful of the needs that polyamory is satisfying in each of their own lives. 

For example, we all have a need for connection. You can meet that need through monogamy or polyamory. Understanding how polyamory fulfills your needs in addition to connection (certainty, uncertainty, significance, growth, and contribution) is critical. 

Understanding your needs is critical to discussing conversations around relationship orientation (polyamory, swinging) and/or sexuality. 

4. Willingness To Be Flexible And Collaborative!

Start asking your partner once a week what you can do to meet THEIR needs better and address the feedback in the upcoming week. 

If you aren’t willing to extend yourself for just one partner now, you will not be able to manage polyamory dating, let alone a polyamorous community. 

Open relationships are for those who are interested in living life a bit differently. You will constantly be faced with multiple opportunities to meet the needs of partners, so make sure your time management is on point! 

So if you are interested in getting help before you begin your open relationship journey, text us at 203-733-9600. 

If you know someone who would benefit from this knowledge, feel free to end the stigma around open relationships and send them a link to my YouTube channel – The Sex Healer

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. For clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized coaching on YOUR terms, learn more about our Couples Cure text therapy program.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your relationship and ignite your sex life at What We Do. Call or text us at 203-733-9600, or make an appointment.