Can a 70-Year-Old Woman Be Sexually Active?

Can a 70-Year-Old Woman Be Sexually Active?

 

If you’re in your 70s or are simply wondering, ‘Can a 70-year-old woman be sexually active?’, we have an answer to your question. However, it’s important to keep in mind that sexual activity depends on several factors, such as an overall health condition, libido, and any other challenges or obstacles that can prevent a woman of that age from having sex – and enjoying it!

That being said, it’s completely normal for people in their 70s to be sexually active! If you’re in love with your partner and both want to be intimate physically as well, age shouldn’t be a factor. In this article, we’ll look at all the important details you need to know about sex life for those in their 70s!

 

Sex In Your 70s

Intimacy and sexual engagement are vital throughout life. Many elderly women in their 70s and 80s still engage in sexual activity.

Although physical changes and health issues may influence an older adult’s sexual performance, several techniques can support people in maintaining a fulfilling and pleasurable sexual life. Intimacy and sexual engagement are vital throughout life. Many elderly women in their 70s and 80s still engage in sexual activity.

Changes brought on by aging may impact a person’s sexual life. A person’s sexual life might be impacted by health issues and shifting hormone levels, yet there are things people can do to maintain their sexual fulfillment as they age.

Age does not have to be a factor in sexual limitations. Because they have fewer obligations and are less likely to become pregnant unintentionally, older adults may feel more liberated than they did when they were younger.

 

How Aging Impacts Sex

Changes brought on by aging can have an impact on sexuality. As people age, their sexual organs alter. The vagina may narrow and become less lubricated in females. Menopause may also have an impact on sexual desire. Male erectile dysfunction may become increasingly prevalent.

Individuals may also discover that weight or muscle mass changes impact how they feel about their bodies. Illness, medication, or surgery can all have an impact on the desire and intimacy for sexual activity. Still, not everyone has these issues, and for those that do, many solutions are available.

 

Physical Changes

The vagina might get shorter and narrower as women age, and the vaginal wall can get thinner and stiffer. Less lubrication of the vagina may also occur. This might make vaginal penetration uncomfortable or lessen a person’s desire to have specific types of sexual relations. Luckily, lubricants exist, so they can be used to overcome this problem.

 

Hormonal Changes

Because menopause induces hormonal changes, going through menopause might have an impact on a person’s sexual life. While some menopausal individuals might not see any changes in their sexual lives, others could experience some of the symptoms below:

  • Getting drier and thinner in the vagina might make intercourse painful
  • Decreased desire or libido, trouble becoming aroused
  • Sleep disruptions that might make people feel more exhausted than normal
  • Mood changes that could affect a person’s desire or sex drive

Hormone replacement therapy is a prescription that a doctor might give to help with menopausal symptoms, which could be painful or impact sexual life.

 

Mental Changes

According to numerous studies, the most common reasons why older women avoid having sex are:

  • How satisfied you are with your relationship?
  • How intimate you are with your partner
  • How is your overall health?

Keep in mind that relationship factors are equally important as health-related factors for a woman in her 70s to be sexually active. For instance, if she is feeling anxious or is experiencing symptoms of depression, it will surely impact her ability and will to be intimate and have sex with her partner. 

 

How to Have an Active and Healthy Sex Life in Your 70s

If you have an open mind and a determined spirit, there’s a lot you can do between the sheets that can be really fulfilling. Saying you’re fatigued, that you have a headache, or that something aches is simple. Finding methods to please your loved one and have a quality of sex that may still make you feel turned on and happy with your relationship requires time, patience, and a strong desire. Everything depends on each partner’s mindset.

 

Invest in Your Relationship

The quality of the connection is a determining factor in the enjoyment of sex. A relationship is as wonderful as its sex. Their sexual life will be a reflection of the strength of their relationship if they are able to be candid, open, and accept responsibility for their flaws, errors, and inappropriate actions. Sex will suffer from the contaminated space and it will not be good if the lovers’ relationship space has been contaminated over time. Relationships require care just as much as a house, automobile, children, pets, and plants do. Sex will suffer if the relationship has been neglected for whatever reason. If there isn’t any love in the relationship, you can’t expect your spouse to be loving. 

 

Talk, Talk, Talk, and Talk More.

Good communication is necessary to help those with sexual dysfunction. Sadly, couples often choose to keep their emotions to themselves so as not to let their spouse down; as a result, excuses are created rather than the problems being addressed. Insecurities, shame, and guilt prevent people from solving their sexual difficulties. A couple will never have a resolution if they never discuss their feelings. It is not the solution to sidestep the problem and blame a headache or tiredness. 

 

Be Present

Regarding communication, listening and practicing presence are your greatest friends. The majority of couples are awkward with one another. One may stand in your way, yelling, passing judgment, condemning, or blocking your path, while the other could back off and become silent. When conversing, being present entails meeting each other’s eyes. 

Being present and getting to know their spouse’s language and cultural background means showing respect and having an open heart to truly grasp what their partner is saying without interjecting.

As long as you’re taking care of your health the best you can and feel connected to your partner, you’ve got the green light to make the most of your sexual life!

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Help! I Have No Sex Drive and My Husband Is Mad!

Help! I Have No Sex Drive and My Husband Is Mad!

 

Have you ever thought, “I have no sex drive, and my husband is mad,” to yourself? You may have even attempted to look for advice on how to improve both your relationship and yourself online. Some wives even discuss this with their closest friends to figure out how to be more sexually active with their husbands.

If you care about this topic, keep reading as we explore all your options and their causes. Not being sexually interested in your partner in a monogamous sexual relationship must be addressed. There are times when we do not want to have frequent or any sex with our partners. However, if this phase is lasting too long and you do not know how to bring back that sex magic, it is time to examine what is going on in your relationship. 

 

What is Sex Drive?

Let us first define your sex drive before discussing why it is low and how to boost it. Our desire to have sex is called libido. A person with low sex drive has little or no desire for sex. This will be more noticeable in a long-term relationship than if you are single and not dating. 

A lack of sexual desire can damage your relationship and even cause a breakup if you’re with an allosexual partner. Understandably, if your partner and you have different sexual drives, it may affect your relationship. The only thing that matters here is being honest with yourself and your partner when finding the solution to this unpleasant problem. 

 

Reasons for Lower Sex Drive

Instead of blaming yourself for low sex drive, consider external factors. Some women notice their sex drive dropping greatly after menopause, while others remain aware of it throughout their lives due to cultural and religious beliefs.

Mental illness has been linked to decreased sexual drive and arousal. A lack of sexual drive and sexual dysfunction are common in depressed and anxious people. Check with a therapist to see if your low sex drive is linked to mental health. 

Mental health, menopause, and other factors can affect sex desire. Age, obesity, chronic conditions, medication, pregnancy, and relationship satisfaction can all affect sex drive. We are all different in our ways of being intimate or sexual towards another person, so make sure you are not comparing your situation to your friend’s. 

 

How to Improve Sex Drive

You shouldn’t expect to improve the sexual aspect of your marriage if you’re uncertain of the reason for it. Luckily, there are plenty of ways to improve the sexual connection you have with your husband. Most couples experiencing this issue will seek sex therapy, in which a therapist will assist with the sexual problems you two are having. 

Besides helping you solve the issues that are preventing you from enjoying marital sex, therapists can also improve intimacy between spouses, improve your orgasm experience, help you communicate your sexual wishes that you were afraid or ashamed to share, and so much more. 

You might not know this, yet sleep is crucial for sexual desire. If you’re sleeping only a few hours every night and trying not to collapse under all the responsibilities you have, your desire to be sexually intimate with your partner will most likely be very low. Women who improve the quality and duration of their sleep report a higher sexual drive the next day. 

Also, you can try aphrodisiacs, such as foods like raw oysters, strawberries, and chocolate, to improve your sexual desire. Yoga, mindfulness, and regular exercise can also enhance your libido and lead to more frequent sexual activities.

 

Different Sex Drive Levels in Relationships

There is no normal sex drive or norm that everyone should aspire to when it comes to being sexually attracted to or having sex with another human being. You might need to have sex once a week with your husband, while another person will need to have sex with their spouse several times a week. Both of these situations are perfectly fine, as long as they are not making you feel bad or affecting your relationship in any way.

Many couples will notice that one partner’s sex drive and needs are very different from their own. What is key to this is communication, like everything else in marriage. Both partners should be aware of their partner’s sex drive and find a way to ensure their needs are met. Talk to your partner and explain to them how you feel about sex. The sooner they understand that your lower sex drive has nothing to do with them, the healthier your sex life will be. 

Couples who differ in sexual expectations often realize that being open and honest in their communication about sex leads to stronger connections and a greater desire to have sex. Let’s not forget that one of the most powerful aphrodisiacs is not chocolate, sexy lingerie, or a gym body – it is the connection built through valuable conversations with your partner. 

Forget about improving your sex drive and setting goals in your mind. Work on connecting better with your partner, trying out new and exciting things, and learning something new about each other, and you will notice the sparkle coming back both in your relationship and your bed. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Comprehensive Sex Therapy: Unlocking a Fulfilling Life

Comprehensive Sex Therapy: Unlocking a Fulfilling Life

 

In our fast-paced, modern lives, it’s not uncommon for sex and intimacy to be relegated to just another item on our never-ending “to-do” list and to ignore comprehensive sex therapy altogether. Many of the individuals we work with express feeling drained, exhausted, and underappreciated. 

They often find themselves living on autopilot, unable to savor the small, subtle beauties of life. When was the last time you could truly switch off your racing thoughts and immerse yourself in a pleasurable experience? If that moment seems like a distant memory, you’re not alone. Sex therapy offers a path to rediscovering that connection and vitality in your life.

 

Understanding Sex Therapy

Sex therapy is a specialized modality that addresses a multitude of issues related to human sexuality. It’s a powerful tool for becoming more mindful, aware, and connected to your sexuality, and it can alleviate many of the symptoms associated with the pervasive issue of life burnout that so many individuals and couples experience.

 

Exploring the Diverse Realms of Comprehensive Sex Therapy

When delving into the realm of sex therapy, you’ll discover a rich tapestry of subcategories, each designed to address specific aspects of sexuality and intimacy. These include, but are not limited to:

 

1. Readjusting Sex Life after Transitions

Life transitions, such as becoming parents, going through menopause, experiencing injuries, and more, can significantly impact your sexual life. Sex therapy provides guidance on adapting to and finding joy in these new phases.

2. Pain during intercourse

Experiencing pain during sex can be emotionally and physically taxing. Sex therapy addresses the underlying causes and helps you find relief and enjoyment.

3. Low or no desire

Loss of sexual desire can be distressing, but it’s a challenge that sex therapy can help you overcome, rekindling the flame of passion in your relationship.

4. Identity and Orientation Issues

Exploring and embracing one’s sexual identity and orientation is a transformative journey, and sex therapy provides the support and understanding needed.

5. Desire Discrepancies

When partners have differing levels of desire, it can strain a relationship. Sex therapy offers strategies for bridging this gap and fostering intimacy.

6. History of Sexual Trauma

Healing from past traumas is a critical aspect of sex therapy. It offers a safe space to address and work through these deeply rooted issues.

7. Orgasm Issues

Difficulty achieving orgasm is a common concern. Sex therapy explores the psychological and physical factors contributing to this issue.

8. Fertility

Dealing with infertility can be emotionally challenging. Sex therapy provides support and strategies for coping with the impact on your relationship and self-esteem.

9. Erectile Dysfunction

Erectile dysfunction can be a source of anxiety and frustration for many. Sex therapy helps individuals and couples navigate this challenge with empathy and guidance.

10. Sex Education

For those seeking a deeper understanding of their own bodies and sexuality, sex education is an essential component of sex therapy.

 

Breaking Free from Shame and Stigma

Shame frequently characterizes societal attitudes in the United States and some of the Americas toward sex, our bodies, and intimacy. This cultural backdrop can hinder open discussions about intimate issues. However, I firmly believe that removing the veil of shame and encouraging open dialogue is incredibly empowering.

Important Note: It’s essential to clarify that I am not a sex surrogate. All therapy sessions are talk-based and conducted with clothes on. My role as a therapist is to guide you on a journey of self-exploration, helping you tap into the many facets of your identity, including your sexuality, to empower you to become the best version of yourself.

Through talk therapy, goal-setting, and other proven methods, we can help you strengthen your relationship with your partner. Let’s embark on a transformative journey toward a more fulfilling and vibrant life. Come schedule a private session with Sarah Fitzgerald, LCSW or Amanda Pasciucco, PhD, LMFT, AASECT CST.

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

Sex Counselor & How They Can Help You Through Divorce

Sex Counselor & How They Can Help You Through Divorce

 

There are many reasons why people find divorce to be the most stressful situation of their lives, yet a sex counselor might be exactly what you need. After all, most people will talk about how to recover emotionally, and as much as this is crucial, sex and intimacy are important aspects of your life, and you should dedicate your attention to them as well. 

In this article, we’ll take a closer look at the importance of having a sex counselor support you through a divorce and why you should consider finding one. 

 

Why Sex Matters 

Sex is a big deal in marriages, so why assume it will not be a big deal in divorces? It is so much more than just a physical activity; it involves intimacy, connection, excitement, pleasure, and trust. For a couple to enjoy sex, they need to make sure that both partners’ needs are met, and that can often be challenging. It might be that sex is not the reason why you and your spouse have decided to part ways, yet it will have a significant impact on how you see yourself as a sexual being in your upcoming relationships.

For instance, if your partner was never interested in sex, you might feel awkward that your next partner is initiating it and not know how to respond to it. Or, you might feel uninspired to try out different things in bed because your spouse didn’t like them, so you’ll assume that your partner in the future will be the same way. All of these beliefs affect how we see ourselves and how we connect with others, both romantically and sexually. 

 

Numerous sex issues can occur in your marriage and follow you way past your divorce, such as:

  • You stopped having sex,
  • You or your spouse initiate arguing after sex,
  • You don’t match each other’s libido,
  • You see sex as a more or less important aspect of your marriage than your spouse,
  • You or your spouse find other people more sexually appealing than each other. 

 

After Divorce

Your first sexual encounter following a divorce may be remarkably similar to your very first encounter. Both men and women are concerned about having their first sexual encounter following a divorce. Males may have some erection problems due to the strain of a new relationship and their eagerness for sex. 

You can feel apprehensive since their body will differ from what you are used to. Will you know where everything is and how to turn it on? You could also experience climaxing troubles rather than erection problems. Once more, guilt over sleeping with a different person could prevent you from experiencing orgasm.  

When having sex for the first time after a divorce, women may be reluctant to expose their bodies out of concern that they are not perfect enough, especially if they are middle-aged. The first time you have sex after a divorce, you might not be able to climax because you might not be able to unwind and trust your partner enough to feel free with them. 

If your first sexual encounter doesn’t go as you expected, don’t be disappointed. It will take time to adjust to many aspects of your new life, including intimacy after divorce and a new sexual partner.

 

Reasons to Talk to a Sex Counselor

Sex therapists are licensed counselors, physicians, or other healthcare professionals who have received further training in assisting clients with sex-related issues.

Many people, at some point in their lives, struggle with sex. Some people can easily help themselves. Others may experience significant discomfort and sadness as a result of sexual issues. 

These are just a few of the sexual issues that a sex counselor can help you with:

  • Lack or absence of sexual desire,
  • Difficulties having an orgasm,
  • Feeling pain during sex,
  • Inability to practice penetrative sex,
  • Erectile dysfunction,
  • Premature ejaculation.

 

Your concerns will be discussed with a sex therapist, who will determine whether they are more likely to be psychological, physical, or a combination of the two.

 Each counseling session is private. You can go to a sex therapist alone, yet it could be best if you both go if your spouse is also affected by the issue.

You will have a more profound knowledge of what is happening and the causes by discussing and examining your experiences. The therapist could also assign you and your partner specific exercises and chores to complete independently.

 

Quick Tips to Help Yourself Enjoy Sex Again

The best way to solve any issue around sex and intimacy in your marriage or even during a divorce is to talk to a sex counselor. They will provide the best support and guide you on your path to falling in love with yourself as a sexual being – which we all are! That said, there are a few things you can try on your own that might help you improve how you feel about sex. Keep in mind that each situation is individual, so some of these tips might not work for you. 

The first piece of advice would be to solo touch. It might sound silly, yet how well do you truly know what feels good? Do you know which sensations and which parts of your body provoke a feeling of pleasure? Many people will forget about things that they are passionate about exploring with their partner. So, if that’s your situation, give yourself a few orgasms before you get back in the game.

Also, do not rush into sex.  Speeding up to get over it is unnecessary. You should enjoy it and do it when it feels right, whether it’s the first night you meet them or after a few months. One thing you should also be clear about with yourself is not to use sex to fill up the void. Sleeping alone after years of marriage might seem weird or even too scary, so you might get the idea of getting into bed with someone to fill up the void. Keep in mind that the best motivation to have sex with someone is when you’re truly attracted to them; otherwise, you will feel even more lonely after having sex with a person you don’t even like.

 

The Bottom Line

Sex after divorce may simultaneously be terrifying, thrilling, and fulfilling. To shape your sexual life after divorce, you must go carefully into the unexplored region. However, you don’t have to do it alone. Consider reaching out to a sex counselor and getting the support you need to solve any unresolved sexual issues, and look forward to sexual experiences coming your way!

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Intimacy Therapy Guide: How to Make the Most of It

Intimacy Therapy Guide: How to Make the Most of It

 

When talking about intimacy therapy, many of us will assume it has to do mostly with sex. However, there is so much more to intimacy than just that, while it is a crucial component. When you are close to someone, your mind, body, and spirit may all be involved. This is what it means to be intimate. It’s about having the strongest possible sense of connection to individuals who are close to you. 

You might feel intimately connected whether you’re in a romantic, platonic, or family connection. Counseling for intimate relationships might be helpful if you need help in this area. 

 

What Is Intimacy Therapy?

Most of us seek closeness because it helps us feel close to others and like valuable members of a group. We can’t always have intimacy in the manner we’d like to, though. That is where intimacy therapy comes in. 

Both single people and couples who want to explore intimacy might benefit from intimacy therapy. The goal is to find any obstacles preventing you from having the connection you deserve and want. It might have some similarities with sex therapy, yet they are not the same. Sex therapists concentrate on sex-related difficulties, while intimacy therapy doesn’t always have to be about that. 

You should be able to develop trust, vulnerability, and commitment with yourself and others through effective counseling. It is a type of talk therapy that may assist you in locating healthy answers to any intimate issues you may be experiencing. 

 

Understanding Intimacy

Before finding the right therapist for you, you will need to understand intimacy first. It’s important to comprehend the many sorts of closeness to determine whether you require intimacy therapy. Some of the most typical are the following:

  • Emotional: Frequently has to do with how you feel and how close you think you are to someone. Anything that gives you a deep emotional connection, such as the sensation of being loved, noticed, heard, or safe while discussing your feelings, might qualify. 
  • Sexual: When you interact sexually or in a sensual way with someone. 
  • Intellectual: The joining of two brains via deep discourse, common interests or principles.
  • Physical: Closeness that is either non-sexual or sexual, such as hugs, kisses, massages, hand holding, or snuggling.
  • Spirituality: Supporting one another’s personal growth and working for a shared objective and respect for one another’s unique or shared views. 
  • Experiential: Establishing relationships via common interests or experiences. 

 

Benefits of Intimacy Therapy

Intimacy isn’t often at the top of the list of all the education we receive. The media, our caretakers, or our friends frequently provide us with some unhelpful examples. This implies that we could develop behaviors that prevent us from engaging in intimacy and having healthy relationships. 

Perhaps you find it difficult to be personal with yourself because you find it difficult to overcome emotions of shame. Or a once-warm relationship has abruptly turned frigid. This wouldn’t be unusual, given that research shows that closeness increases throughout the early stages of a relationship before finally becoming static. Through counseling, you may discover new techniques for fostering closeness in your relationships and with yourself and help you break harmful patterns.  

The easiest subject to discuss is intimacy difficulties. You might not yet be able to communicate respectfully, listen actively, and have an open mind. You may acquire insight and develop workable answers to any problems by speaking with a qualified expert. Counseling can offer solutions whether you want to improve your sexual relationship or get to know yourself better. When there is someone who can assist, you shouldn’t have to deal with these problems on your own. 

 

How to Build Intimacy in Relationship

It is possible to overcome your fear of intimacy or issues you might have in that area. A sympathetic therapist can assist you in comprehending the underlying feelings that underlie your dread. They can assist you in addressing these emotions and identifying other, better-coping mechanisms for isolation.

Occasionally, mental health conditions like avoidant personality disorder can further exacerbate problems with intimacy. This can be treated, which has important advantages for those facing these issues.

Even when neither partner dislikes intimacy, a couple may struggle to communicate. The following advice may help you and your partner get closer and have more intimacy in your relationship.

  • Be more tolerant. It takes a lot of time to get to know someone well. The process of establishing trust is frequently laborious. No race can define intimacy.
  • Start with the little things. Discuss your hopes and objectives if you prefer to talk about the future rather than the past. As trust grows, you could find broaching the more challenging subjects less threatening.
  • Openly discuss your needs. Do you frequently require alone to rejuvenate? How frequently do you like having sex? Instead of presuming that your wishes are “obvious and clear,” be explicit with your spouse about what you want to avoid a lot of misunderstandings.
  • Be respectful of one another’s differences. Even the closest of couples still have their personalities. To love each other and have a happy relationship, you and your spouse do not always have to agree on everything.

 

There is still hope if you and your partner struggle to become closer. Couples counseling can improve communication and help you clear up misconceptions. Additionally, it can aid both parties in overcoming any intimacy-related issues that could hold them back. Getting assistance is not a sign of shame.

 

Finding the Right Intimacy Therapist

It’s crucial to find a therapist who can help you with your intimacy issues, regardless of what they are. A good therapist is crucial for your healing path, and finding one should not be that difficult if you know what you need. 

For instance, maybe you will prefer in-person sessions, so you will look for an intimacy therapist nearby. Or, you will want someone with years of experience in couples therapy, so you might opt for someone with work experience in that field. Whatever it is you’re looking for, it’s important to feel positive and motivated about working with that therapist because it’s a crucial element of each therapy, especially if you’re working on your intimacy issues. 

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

Two hands holding one another - one with tattoos.

What Is Consent in a Relationship?

What Is Consent in a Relationship?

 

If you’re looking for a clear answer to what is consent, the first thing you will need to know is that it’s about mutually respecting yourself and the other person you are getting consent from. 

When someone gives you their consent, it means they are permitting you or agreeing to express something with you! 

  1. Consent cannot be assumed just because someone is silent, hasn’t said the word ‘no,’ or because the sexual partners have a relationship or sexual past together.
  2. Consent may be revoked at any time. 
  3. Force, threat, or intimidation are not acceptable methods for obtaining consent. 
  4. A person who is in any way incapacitated cannot give consent.

Before diving into this topic, there are a few things to remember when having sexual relations with someone.  

 

What is Consent?

Sexual consent means agreeing to participate in a specific sexual activity. Before being sexual with another person, you will need to know if they truly want to be sexual with you as well. On the other side, make sure you’ve communicated what you want with your partner before initiating intercourse or any other sexual activity.

Both consenting and asking for one serve to encourage people to set their own boundaries and respect the boundaries of others. Also, it serves to check if everything is clear and, if not, to communicate it properly before sex. Both partners must give sexual consent each time before engaging in sexual activity for the sex to be considered consensual. 

Without sexual consent, any sexual activity, from oral sex or genital touching to vaginal or anal penetration, is considered sexual assault or rape. You have every right to decide what happens to your body. It doesn’t matter if you were up for it ten minutes ago and even said ‘yes’ to your sexual partner; you can change your mind freely. Every person is allowed to say “stop” at any time before and during sexual activity, and their partner must respect it. 

You have to be a person that is comfortable and gracious about receiving a no. That is what consent is. If you guilt someone, or pressure them when they say “no,” that is not consensual. That is covertly manipulating a situation to get your needs met. 

 

Sexual Assault and Rape

Who can consent to sexual activity is regulated by law. Someone who is drunk, high, or passed out cannot consent sexually. Minors are protected from sexual activity with adults. Meaning, sex with a minor resulted in jail time and sex offender registration.  

Despite their legal definitions, rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse all begin with lack of consent. All of these involve unconsented sexual contact. This means that sexual contact without consent is rape, assault, or abuse. 

Anyone can be a victim of rape, sexual assault, or sexual abuse, regardless of their age, gender, or sexual orientation. That said, certain groups of people are more likely than others to experience sexual assault. We particularly want to recognize that women of color, LGBTIA+ individuals, and those with developmental disabilities are more likely to experience sexual assault. 

There are numerous ways in which sexual violence can occur. Rape or sexual assault can occur without a weapon, and the victim does not have to fight back, scream, or say ‘no’. Our most common image is of sexual assaults in dark alleyways with strangers, even though that is rare. Family, relatives, and romantic partners often are the perpetrator.  

If you or anyone you know has experienced any type of sexual violence, keep in mind that you’re not alone and that help is available to all victims of sexual violence.

 

How to Ask For Consent

Most of the time, you’ll hear people talking about giving consent before a certain sexual activity. However, asking for consent is equally important in communication between two individuals who will become sexual partners. Both partners need to give their consent to have sex. 

Openly discussing consent with your partner is best. Request it in multiple formats. Instead of saying the same thing over and over, ask your partner if they are ready to engage in sexual activity, and then confirm with them if they are comfortable with how things went later. 

Asking for consent does not have to slow down or diminish sexual desire. While communicating and being intimate with your partner, you can request consent. Although consent is required before any sexual activity, make an effort to communicate with the person you are getting to know more about.  If you are about to have sex with your long-term partner, you probably already know whether or not they want to have sex at that particular time. However, asking for consent implies consent from both partners in a relationship. 

 

How to Give Consent

Like asking for consent, you should give your consent to your partner. That will inform them that you agree to continue being sexually intimate with them and give them the ‘green light’ to proceed. You are not, nevertheless, required to wait for your partner to inquire whether you are enjoying the foreplay. In other words, a person can give consent without waiting for their partner to ask for it. 

Informing your partner that you consent to having sex with them helps you both be transparent about your sexual desires and allows you to connect sexually. However, don’t confuse giving consent with receiving it. You will still need to hear your partner say they are okay with moving things forward sexually to continue with a certain sexual activity. Once both partners have given their consent, you can proceed with sex and make the most of it together. 

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

How To Get a Girl Horny: Pro Tips and Tricks

How To Get a Girl Horny: Pro Tips and Tricks

 

For all of you wondering how to get a girl horny, today we’re sharing our best tips and ideas on how to make her panties wet. Luckily, there are plenty of tricks you can try out when wanting to get a girl very interested in being sexually intimate with you. Although you might assume that things get heated up after the penetration, you will be surprised to hear that for most girls, foreplay is key to good sex.

You will find plenty of articles online on how to improve your sex game or lead your girl to orgasm, yet very few of them talk about setting the mood for sex and upgrading your foreplay game. If you’re curious to learn what works and what doesn’t, continue reading this article and taking notes.

 

Build Up the Chemistry

Establish sexual chemistry before making any moves. Instead of admitting you like her, flirt with her verbally and nonverbally. You can flirt by casually complimenting her looks or outfit. You might also tease her a little bit by cracking a joke or two. Please keep in mind that most girls will feel attracted to someone who makes them laugh.

With nonverbal flirting, you will need to learn how to look at her in a way that makes her intrigued. You should look deep into her eyes, and when your eyes meet, do not look away. This is where the flirtation starts. You can slightly smile at her when she looks your way, even if you’re already conversing with her. 

 

Sit Close to Her

If you’re not comfortable with flirting, this one might seem awkward to you at first. Ensure that you sit extremely close to the girl you wish to get horny with the next time you see her. This will also allow you to see how she feels near you. When you’re that close to her, pay attention to her signs. She might turn towards you and start a pleasant chat, decide to sit even closer to you, or show you she is not interested in sharing her space with you. 

You can show her something interesting on your phone to have her lean closer and see how she feels sitting this close to you. Or, you might show her something that is in front of you, such as a billboard sign or a parked sports car. 

Although you will be focusing on another thing, you will notice whether or not she feels comfortable with you being really close to her.

 

Talk about Something You’re Passionate about

Many girls will become attracted to someone when they notice their passion for something. For instance, seeing a person talk about their favorite band, movie, sport, or childhood memory can really turn a girl on. Your passion doesn’t have to be anything out of the ordinary. You might talk about your favorite restaurant or how you feel about your upcoming vacations. 

For someone listening, you will show a side of you they haven’t seen before. This is also probably where your confidence lies, another factor girls seek in their partners. Getting immediately into foreplay or sex is not nearly as interesting as getting attracted to another person gradually and then, when things get heated up, starting with the action.

 

Avoid Touching

As much as physical contact can be sensual and flirty, try to avoid it until you’re 100% sure the girl is interested. Think about it: a part of what makes flirting interesting is the uncertainty of the outcome—whether or not the girl will like you back. Even if you notice that she is becoming more and more interested, try to avoid touching her to get her even more excited.

After all, words can be a powerful seduction tool. Tease her and show her you’re the catch. Curiosity will motivate her to continue talking to you and, when the time is right, move it to the next level. 

 

Let’s Get Physical!

There’s a reason why it takes a few steps until you can try to either touch her fingers, move hair from her face, hug her, or do anything else that naturally comes to mind. Touching someone without first determining whether or not they are interested in you will eliminate any possibility of arousing their desire. 

Once you’ve read all the signs right and noticed she likes having you close and there is a certain chemistry between you, you can try to show her you like her in a decent physical way. For instance, you might touch her fingers while you’re sitting close and talking. Or, you might move her hair from her face after a sudden breeze. 

All of these movements will show you how she reacts to physical touch. If she touches your back or indicates that everything is well received, you are on your way to getting a girl horny. You two decide how to proceed from there. You could stop here or continue privately.

Make sure you are both okay with sex and have everything you need for the safest and most pleasurable experience. Each example is unique; some people will need weeks or months to get a particular girl horny, while others might need a few hours. There is no magic formula, and oftentimes, it will depend on factors that are out of your control. 

 

Conclusion

Ready to get a girl horny? If there’s a person you like, why not try to put your new skills to the test? Ask them out for a coffee or a dinner; invite them to see a music concert; or ask them to work out with you in the gym. If they accept, it means they would like to spend some time with you.

When you meet, it will be up to you to see if her interest is purely friendly or if there is something more for you to discover. 

 

BLISS: Proven Methods for Improving the Female Orgasm

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) who has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists helps all clients who visit us with a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy, and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

How to give a sensual massage

How to Give a Sensual Massage

How to Give a Sensual Massage That’s Actually Hot and Nice

We hope you enjoy this article on sensual massage. LCAT owner, Dr. Amanda Pasciucco was interviewed by Self.com writer Ro White. This article was published in Self.com on September 15, 2023.

 

Here’s exactly what to do—and not do—to pull off a sexy, relaxing back rub.

If you’re seeking new ways to feel close to your partner, you might be wondering how to give them a good sensual massage to help you connect. (And a downright sexy massage offers even more opportunities for intimacy.) Horny touching, including massage, causes our brains to release oxytocin, a.k.a. the “love hormone”, so an erotic massage is the perfect recipe for bonding, relaxation, and arousal—possibly even a better sex life.

Read on as experts share how to give a sexy back massage to turn on both you and your partner—and maybe set the mood for more.


Talk to your partner about what their dream massage would look like.

There’s no one way to give an erotic massage, so before you pump up the Marvin Gaye and break out the “good” massage oil, ask your partner what they’d like to get out of this experience—and share your own desires too.

“The ‘why’ of the massage should dictate the ‘how,’” Barbara Carrellas, an AASECT-certified sex educator who teaches erotic massage, tells SELF. So: Are you and your partner seeking connection, or maybe novelty? Are you wanting to take some pressure off of your sexual performance? Are you having trouble getting out of your own head and looking for new forms of foreplay? Do you just think their back is hot and want to love up on it a little? Find out!

Once you’re clear on the “why” behind your sexy massage, decide together how you’d like it to feel. “Erotic massages can be therapeutic, relaxing, stimulating, healing, sensual, sexual, kinky, or whatever other intention you set,” Carrellas says.

Check in about where and how your partner wants to be touched and if there are any no-go zones, AASECT-certified sex therapist Amanda Pasciucco, LMFT, CST, tells SELF.

You should definitely ask whether your partner wants the massage to include overtly sexual contact. “Each person likes to be touched in a different way,” Pasciucco explains. “Some people love the adrenaline of just going toward the genitals, while many others enjoy long, slow strokes to build up anticipation.”


Make your surroundings feel sexier.

Use dim lighting, a playlist featuring gentle music, and candles to create an ambiance that helps your partner feel relaxed, Pasciucco says. (Just make sure the candles are securely placed far from the massage zone—catching your hair on fire would kill the mood.)

One of the best—but often overlooked—massage tips isn’t about what you set up, but what you get the hell out of sight at home. Pasciucco suggests removing any potential distractions from the room, like pets, phones, piles of laundry, and family photos (you probably won’t want your relatives staring you down while you zealously knead your partner’s butt cheeks).

If this kind of traditional massage setup feels slightly corny to you, Pasciucco suggests leaning into the cringe. “Making your bedroom look like a temple of love might not be your norm, but do it anyway,” she says. Trust that once you’re squeezing your partner’s thighs, you’ll probably both be too turned-on to feel embarrassed—and until you get there, it’s okay to laugh a little too.

If you just can’t get past the corniness of candles and soft music, there are plenty of other ways you can set the mood. “While some people like candles, soft music, and feathers, others like dark dungeons, floggers, and being ordered to get on the massage table,” Carrellas says. There’s no one perfect way to do this: The vibe of your sexy massage should feel personal to you and your partner! Let your imaginations tell you what a “good massage” should look like.


Pick an oil that’s up to the hot task at hand.

Your most important massage tool is lotion or oil, since this will help your hands glide more easily along your partner’s body, Pasciucco notes. Just make sure you review the ingredients first, especially if either of you has skin allergies or fragrance sensitivities.

Since this is a sexy massage, chances are there might be some genital-touching involved either during or after the rubdown. If you’re planning to use this same oil externally on your partner’s junk, you’ll need a fragrance-free oil, as scented products (including essential oils) can irritate the urethra (where pee comes out). Soothing Touch’s nut-free massage oilSliquid’s Escape massage oil, and Now Solutions’ massage oil are all excellent options.

For any vaginal penetration, you’ll want an all-natural oil to avoid irritation or infection. Vagina-safe options include coconut oil, hemp seed oil, grape seed oil, vegetable oil, sunflower oil, and olive oil, as the Cleveland Clinic notes. Keep in mind that using oil inside the vagina can increase the risk of developing a yeast infection, according to a UCLA study, so if your partner knows their vagina doesn’t respond well to oil or if they’re not sure, clean your hands after the massage and switch to lube when you’re doing hand stuff.

If you think your massage might lead to sex involving safer sex barriers, like condoms, make sure you use only water-based or silicone lube for any between-the-legs action and thoroughly wash your hands before handling barriers. Since oil degrades latex, getting massage oil on a latex condom or dental dam can prevent your barrier from doing its job.

Finally, make sure any sex toys, or sensations toys like feathers, paddles, and floggers, that you plan to use are easily accessible, too, so you don’t have to fumble around with slick hands.


Sensual massage techniques.

Take it slow.

Have your partner lie flat on a bed face-down or face-up, depending on the areas you’d like to focus on. They can be partially dressed or fully nude—whatever feels most comfortable.

Once your partner is situated, find a position for your own body that you won’t mind holding for a while. You can sit beside your partner, pull up a chair next to the bed, or—if you want to heat things up right away and this works for both of you—straddle your partner while you oil up your hands and prepare to caress their stress away.

Massage techniques can and should vary based on what your partner’s into, but here are some rules of thumb about sensual touch: If you’re planning on giving a full-body massage experience, start by gently kneading your partner’s shoulders, adding more massage oil as needed, and checking in with them about the level of pressure you’re using. “Erotic massage creates lots of space for communication, so there’s always room for your partner to ask for more or less of any touch,” Carrellas explains.

Rub your partner’s back and limbs (or whatever part of the body they like) with circular motions, or with long, smooth strokes along each muscle using your palms and the whole lengths of your fingers and tips of your forefingers. “Touching with your whole hand feels like an embrace,” Carrellas says. “You can use this technique to glide anywhere on your partner’s body without lifting your palm.” Another one of the best sensual massage techniques: Use your thumbs in areas where your partner wants more pinpointed pressure, like on the arches of their feet. If your hands need a rest, throw in some kissing or licking, if that’s your partner’s thing. (If they don’t mind oil in their hair, go ahead and stroke it—just ask first if you don’t know.)

Once your partner is feeling relaxed, ramp up their arousal by stroking and rubbing erogenous zones, like their earlobes, chest, butt, and inner thighs, before venturing between their legs, if that’s something you’re both down for. A sexy massage doesn’t have to end in genital stimulation—“an erotic massage should with pleasure, which doesn’t necessarily mean an orgasm,” Pasciucco says. But if you and your partner want your massage to get a little spicier, go for it! Sensual massage can feel incredible on your partner’s whole body—not just their back.


Read more of Dr. Pasciucco’s media interviews here.

Erogenous Zones Not To Ignore For Maximum Pleasure

Erogenous Zones Not To Ignore For Maximum Pleasure

 

To truly boost your sensuality, you need to be aware of erogenous zones that you should not ignore for pleasure. Consider your partner’s ears, lower back, collar bones, and so on when you explore. Sexuality and sensuality are not just about penetration and coitus. If you ever took your time to kiss your partner’s neck and got them aroused that way, you know what we’re talking about here.

Many body parts are unfairly ignored regarding sex, and this article aims to change that once and for all. Say goodbye to repeating the same seduction steps over and over again, and say hello to exploring other areas of the body that can provide the same or even more pleasure for both of you!

 

  • Neck

If you have a neck, you are aware of it. The nape and back of your neck have an abundance of nerve endings that only take a light touch to drive you both crazy. To reach that concentration of nerves, ask your partner to lightly run the tips of their fingers up and down your neck as you kiss. You can also do it to them first and ask them to do the same for you. Establish a no-kissing-on-the-lips rule and ask your partner to concentrate on your neck instead to turn the heat up a notch. Trust us, you will love the tension this move builds!

 

  • Inner Thighs

Have your partner tease your inner thighs for a while before moving on to the main meal. Because of its extreme sensitivity and dense concentration of nerve endings, this skin is particularly receptive to your partner’s bites, nips, and licks. To take things to the next level, urge your spouse to trail an ice cube up and down your thighs and enjoy that new feeling.

 

  • Armpits

You probably don’t think of your armpits while considering foreplay. Your armpits may be a shockingly erogenous area, though, if you can get over a little perspiration, hair, and taboo. Consider it like this: Your underarms are delicate. They may be quite seductive in this region for the same reason that makes them so ticklish.

How to explore: Ask your companion to stroke your underarms softly with the tips of their fingers. Use a gentle up-and-down motion at first, then a quick, circular motion. Pay special attention to what produces the optimum reaction. Sure, it’s amusing, yet it’s also alluring.

 

  • Ears

Despite being very sensual, ears are frequently disregarded, which makes them an even hotter area when you want to turn things up in bed. Because there are so many sensory receptors in the ears, they are really quite sensitive to touch.

Start out by having your lover delicately draw with their fingertips while you are kissing the C-shaped outline of your ear. A little kiss or nibble might potentially ignite a bonfire. Coupled with some below-the-belt movement, this may be an exceptionally potent maneuver; it may even assist you in reaching the peak of your sexual pleasure.

 

  • Hands

The hands are quite seductive. Even a gentle, firm touch can produce waves of feeling. One of the most sensual organs is your hand. Sucking on fingers truly constitutes an oral sexual act. Like sex, a partner may deliver the same signal to the brain’s reward region by sucking on the finger and massaging it with the tongue.

Have your partner slowly make circles with their tongue while they softly kiss the tips of your fingers to explore. Consider using a little mild suction if you’re into it.

 

  • Feet

Even if you don’t like feet or believe you don’t like feet, the proper touch might alter all that. Pressure areas on the foot may cause arousal in certain people. Particularly densely endowed with nerve endings are the arches of your feet, making them extremely sensitive.

You should concentrate on solid, consistent strokes rather than soft, ticklish motions, since some people are ticklish down there. Consider it more like a massage, which is enjoyable and can aid in relaxing, a necessary condition for many women to have orgasms.

 

  • Inside of the Ankle

We may as well discuss the second significant erogenous zone down there—the inside of the ankle—since we’re already down by the feet.

Najjar notes that this particular location is undoubtedly one that may elicit pleasure when stimulated appropriately with mild touch, similar to the wrist. Additionally, it has a sensuous quality that could even make you want to kiss and taste it.

 

  • Scalp

Don’t undervalue the value of some good hair-pulling! Your scalp has millions of tiny nerve endings, and if you’ve ever had your hair pulled during sex, you know it’s an erogenous zone.

You can still profit from the many nerve endings on the scalp, even if ripping off your hair isn’t your thing. It doesn’t matter if you like to stroke your partner’s hair or they prefer to stroke yours—either way, there is still a delightful sexiness to the act.

 

  • Inner Knee

The area behind your knee may not have received much attention in the past, yet try gently massaging it with your hand or having your partner do it, and you’ll discover that it’s far more sensitive than you thought. “If you want to, have your lover lick and cuddle it. It’s a brand-new area waiting to be discovered. It is a direct route to other alluring body regions.

 

  • Lower Back

The back frequently comes up when asked about their preferred erogenous areas. For some people, it’s the interscapular—that difficult-to-reach area between your shoulder blades. (Perhaps that’s what makes it so desirable: it’s out of reach.) If you want, trail down the lower back to the sensitive area just above the ass crease. As you walk beside someone, consider each time they have placed their hand there. Hot, huh? When they contact it while unclothed, it becomes extremely sexy!

 

Final Words

There are a few obvious areas you want your partner to go to when things are getting hot. Your lips, nipples, and genitalia, however, hardly scrape the surface of erogenous zones—those crazy-sensitive hot places that may transform you from zero to gotta-have-it-right-now. There are incredibly sensitive regions of your body that you might not even be aware of. Explore these areas to find the ones that suit you and your partner the most, and enjoy these sexy games!

 

Tantric Sex Best Practices: Breathing, Desire & Arousal

Sensual Meditation: Strategies to Fall in Lust Again

Sensual Meditation: Strategies to Fall in Lust Again

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

Yoga for Better Stamina & Poses to Boost Pleasure

Yoga for Better Stamina & Poses to Boost Pleasure

 

Have you ever considered practicing yoga for better stamina? Well, there are many benefits you can enjoy from yoga, and improving stamina and sex is one of them. Reduced stress is surely the greatest advantage of yoga, which is great for bedroom activities as well. Practicing yoga regularly lowers cortisol levels, lowering stress levels in the body. In other words, if you are stressed, you will probably experience decreased sexual desire. 

This is why yoga is becoming a popular solution to improve sex quality among couples. To help you make the most of it, we’ve decided to gather all the relevant details about this trend!

 

Ways Yoga Benefits Your Life

Additionally, yoga may enhance overall sexual performance. Yoga teaches you how to calm your thoughts and pay attention to your body. Combining these two techniques will help you gain awareness of your likes and dislikes, enabling you to communicate with your spouse more effectively.

Regular yoga practice helps you become more mindful of the moment, which is crucial to improving your stamina. Yoga and sex improve your overall health—physically, mentally, and emotionally. The experience will be nicer for you both the more present you can be with your companion.

 

Yoga Poses for Better Stamina

Yoga is a great way to connect with your body and breath, which may help increase sexual longevity. It also improves flexibility, which might encourage you to try out new poses. As a result, regular yoga practice will leave you stronger and more toned, which can boost your self-assurance in your physical appearance.

 

  • Downward-Facing Dog

Stretching your muscles and improving blood flow to your body in the downward dog position can assist you in reducing stress. This stance will assist you in finding new, vivacious energy.

Keep your legs as straight as possible while putting your hands shoulder-width apart on the ground. Inhale deeply and keep your tailbone up as you place your hands on the mat.

 

  • Eagle Pose

Balancing in the eagle stance demands intense concentration. You’ll become more attentive and present if you carry this focus into the bedroom. Start by standing tall and lifting your left leg to perform this stance. As you lower yourself into a squatting position, hook it behind your right calf. Then parallelize your arms in front, hook your right arm underneath, and clasp your palms.

 

  • Frog Pose

Bhekasana, also known as the frog pose, can alleviate leftover tension in the groin region while boosting blood flow to the pelvic region. This region is essential for promoting arousal.

Start by bending your knees and pointing your feet outward. Start by pulling your hips back and opening up your legs. Your inner thighs will begin to strain severely. It’s a strong one, so you might unknowingly hold your breath. Hold for 1 minute, yet don’t forget to breathe. Too much? Put a folded blanket under your knees to modify it.

 

  • Water Hand Gesture

Deep meditation and orgasm both take place in the same brain state. You can get there by connecting with your water element. This element is associated with sexual expression and marma points, which are stimulation sites on the body related to everything from the health of your organs to the release of hormones. Yoga enhances all facets of sexual functioning, with the most noticeable results in women over 40.

Start by sitting up straight. With your hands on your knees, join your pinky finger and thumb. Make the connection between these points explicit. If your thoughts start to stray, gently bring them back while holding for one minute.

 

  • Bridge Pose

The bridge is a crucial posture to master for enhancing sexual function because it strengthens the pelvic floor and the core, activates the glutes, and increases blood flow to the pelvic area. The pelvic floor is capable of storing a lot of strain. Mindfulness techniques strengthen the area and allow more blood flow, enabling deeper orgasms and lubrication.

Kneel on the ground with your feet hip-width apart, near your glutes. Put your hands on the floor and lift your glutes while keeping your knees and ankles straight. To prevent stress from building up while you lift, keep your head and shoulders firmly planted. To lift higher, interlace your fingers beneath. For one minute, hold.

 

  • Happy Baby

Happy Baby is a powerful hip opener that promotes flexibility and emotional release. It activates your sacral chakra, the doorway to your pleasure and desire centers. Physically and emotionally, stress can make it difficult to have pleasant sex. Think about your neck or back muscles tensing under stress. Stress can cause the pelvic floor muscles to stiffen up as well, which can make intercourse unpleasant and, in extreme situations, cause vaginismus.

Lie on your back with your knees bent to perform this pose. With your knees slightly wider than your chest, grab the outside of your feet.

 

  • Shoulder Stand Pose

Lower body tension can be relieved with the shoulder stand. Additionally, it might increase blood flow to the pleasure center of the brain.

Lay on the ground with your knees bent to perform this pose. Put your hands out straight, palms facing the ground, on both sides. Using your hands to push through, extend your legs vertically to the ceiling. To support yourself and allow you to extend the stretch, place your hands behind your lower back.

 

  • Corpse Pose

‘Corpse pose’ is the yoga pose known as Savasana. The freedom and room to engage in sexual pleasure are available here. Breathing shallowly or holding your breath is typical, especially when an orgasm is about to occur. This may reduce the depth of the experience. Deep breathing induces relaxation, which heightens your perception of pleasure.

Close your eyes and lie on your back with your arms and legs at your sides. Turn your palms up, breathe gently, and remain for five minutes. As your thoughts wander, resist the need to judge; instead, practice acceptance.

 

The Final Words

While some yoga poses might enhance your stamina and sexual life, being less stressed is the benefit that everyone notices! This offers many advantages and allows you to unwind and enjoy sex!

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

Female Orgasmic Disorder: What Every Woman Needs to Know

Female Orgasmic Disorder: What Every Woman Needs to Know

 

If you haven’t yet heard about the phrase “female orgasmic disorder,” you will probably want to read this article and maybe even send it over to your female friends. Every woman responds to stimulation differently, both in terms of intensity and type. Most women can reach orgasm when their clitoris is stimulated, yet not all of them will orgasm during sexual intercourse. If we consider that some women never even reach orgasm, many questions need to be answered to help women enjoy sex more and have frequent orgasms. 

Many women with orgasmic disorder can’t have an orgasm at all, not even when they’re masturbating or very excited. But if a woman doesn’t have an orgasm because she isn’t stimulated enough, this is called an arousal disorder, not an orgasmic disorder. It’s usually only a problem when the woman is upset about not being able to orgasm. 

What Is Female Orgasmic Disorder?

Several factors can cause female orgasmic disorder. If a woman cannot orgasm, her orgasms take way too long to happen, she orgasms less frequently than you’d prefer, her orgasms are not as intense, or she feels anxious or depressed about orgasms, all of these can be causes for a female orgasmic disorder. Still, if you only have one or two of these problems, it can be called an orgasmic dysfunction instead of an orgasmic disorder. Both are more common than you think, yet luckily, it is possible to treat them and continue enjoying sex as you have before.

As was already said, our orgasms are affected by many things, including our physical health, emotions, hormones, experiences, beliefs, relationships, and way of life. If you experience issues with any of these things, you might have issues with having an orgasm as well. 

What Causes a Female Orgasmic Disorder?

Remember that the factors that cause orgasmic disorder vary from woman to woman. Remember that the factors that cause orgasmic disorder vary from woman to woman. Also, someone might experience only one factor from this list, while another might experience several. 

This is a comprehensive list of all possible causes of orgasmic disorder.

  • Anxiety,
  • Depression, 
  • Stress,
  • Tiredness,
  • Issues with the nerves or blood flow in your genitals,
  • Issues with your sexual or romantic partner,
  • Concerns about your body image,
  • Reduced amounts of sex hormones,
  • Medications (e.g., blood pressure medications, antidepressants, chemotherapy, etc.)
  • Medical problems (e.g., such as bladder issues, diabetes, heart issues, multiple sclerosis, or cancer),
  • Menopause,
  • Pregnancy,
  • Past sexual assault or trauma.

Types of Orgasmic Disorders

The inability to reach sexual climax is the primary sign of orgasmic disorder. When talking about orgasmic disorders, four different kinds exist:

  1. Primary anorgasmia: The inability to experience an orgasm.
  2. Secondary anorgasmia: The inability to orgasm despite having previously had one.
  3. Situational anorexia: This form of orgasmic dysfunction is the most prevalent. It occurs when you can only orgasm in particular circumstances (e.g., during masturbation or oral sex).
  4. General anorgasmia: An inability to experience orgasm at any time, even when you’ve had enough sexual stimulation and are extremely aroused.

How to Treat Female Orgasmic Disorder?

You can make an appointment with your doctor if you think that you have an orgasmic disorder. Your doctor can identify and offer an appropriate course of action. After all, the best way to make sure you can once again thoroughly enjoy sexual activity is to talk about it. 

Your doctor may do a physical examination and ask about your sexual history. Meaning, a gynecologist can then recommend suitable options to treat your orgasmic disorder. 

Orgasm disorder can be treated in various ways, and the cause of the issue will determine how it is treated. You will not have to look for the best treatment, as your doctor or a sexual health therapist can guide you and provide helpful information. When talking to a doctor or therapist, you will be asked about your health and any potential issues mentioned above. These questions can also be about your sex life; however, don’t feel awkward, as they are genuinely interested in helping treat the orgasm disorder.  

Your doctor may also do a physical exam and take blood and urine from you to check for any health problems.

Options for treatment include:

  • Breathing techniques
  • Communicating about fantasies
  • Using sex toys
  • Using moisturizers or lubricants 
  • Elevating your mood through different techniques (e.g., breathing exercises and meditation)
  • Limiting alcohol intake and abstaining from drugs, and smoking
  • Regular exercise and being active
  • Pelvic floor physical treatment 
  • Talking to a sex or relationship therapist 

If you’re in menopause, your doctor might advise inserting a ring, cream, or pill called estrogen in your vagina. This may increase blood flow and moisture by strengthening and stretching the vagina’s muscles.

In Final Words

Being unable to orgasm can be quite frustrating and could affect your relationship. With the proper care, you might be able to start enjoying your orgasms again. It’s critical to understand that you are not alone. Orgasmic disorders affect a lot of women at some point in their lives.

If you suffer from it, counseling may be very beneficial. How you see sexual activity is discussed in individual or couple therapy. By going to therapy together, you and your partner can learn more about each other’s sexual wants and needs. It will also deal with any problems with other people or general stress that are making it hard for you to orgasm. You could return to enjoying your sexual life anytime soon if you take care of these underlying issues.

That said, orgasmic disorder can result from physical issues, so it’s important to talk to your therapist and doctor to get proper treatment. 

 

Are you ready to learn more and unlock a more satisfying experience?

BLISS: Proven Methods for Improving the Female Orgasm

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

Sexual Therapy for Erectile Dysfunction & Other Intimate Concerns

Sexual Therapy for Erectile Dysfunction & Other Intimate Concerns

 

Sexual therapy for erectile dysfunction (commonly known as “ED”) is a form of psychotherapy that helps men (and their partners) address the psychological and emotional factors that are contributing to the ED. 

This type of sexual therapy for erectile dysfunction can include individual therapy or couples counseling and may involve a variety of techniques. 

Additionally, it is important to consider the psychological and emotional impact of ED on individuals and their partners. This can include feelings of anxiety, stress, and low self-esteem, which can impact the individual’s quality of life and relationship satisfaction. In these cases, it may be helpful to seek out counseling or therapy to address these underlying emotional issues.

A sexual therapist for erectile dysfunction can help the couple to identify any emotional or relationship issues that may be contributing to the ED, including yet not limited to cultural context, sexual orientation, anxiety, depression, PTSD, or unresolved conflicts. If you can’t get into the mood because you are stressed out, sex therapy may help you. 

Be mindful that the type of ED concerns you have can vary, yet sex therapy can help a variety of guys. Do you struggle with self-doubt, anxiety, and insecurity in the bedroom? If you cannot keep it up during a steamy session, it makes sense that you would want more support.

Some people come to sex therapy because their partners have incredibly high expectations, which can cause performance anxiety in the bedroom. If you are constantly worrying about your partner’s satisfaction only, you aren’t going to have successful intimate moments in partnered sex.

Finally, some people have sex therapy and ED concerns because of past trauma. Feeling triggered during an intimate event is something that many don’t want to experience. Therefore, they seek out sexual therapy for erectile dysfunction.

 

The main reasons someone may come to sex therapy, other than erectile dysfunction: 

  • To address issues with sexual identity or orientation: 🏳️‍🌈
  • To overcome sexual dysfunction or discomfort: 🤕
  • To improve communication and intimacy in their sexual relationship: 💬
  • To explore and understand their own sexual desires and preferences: 🧐
  • To address past trauma related to sexual experiences: 💔

 

A therapist can also teach the couple communication and intimacy skills to improve their sexual relationship.

It’s important to note that sexual therapy is used in conjunction with other treatments for ED such as tantra, kink, somatic experiences, or sensate focus techniques. 

Therapists skillset and client needs can vary greatly from person to person and is influenced by a range of factors such as culture, religion, and personal values. A qualified sex therapist can help individuals and couples address these needs in a safe, non-judgmental, and confidential environment.

Seeking professional help as soon as possible can help you understand the underlying cause of ED and get the appropriate care.

 

Stiff: Solutions for Erectile Dysfunction On-Demand Webinar

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

Man sitting on edge of bed looking at wall Can erectile dysfunction be cured

Can Erectile Dysfunction Be Cured? 🍌 Learn a Systemic Approach to Aging!

 Can Erectile Dysfunction Be Cured? 🍌Learn a Systemic Approach to Aging!

People often ask can erectile dysfunction be cured? 

As an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, I am here to tell you that erectile dysfunction has a cure and treated successfully.

The specific treatment that is most appropriate for an individual is dependent on the underlying cause of their erectile dysfunction (ED). 

In many cases, you can improve your ED with lifestyle changes, such as cardio exercise, balanced eating – no fatty foods that affect cholesterol and quitting smoking. 

Making lifestyle changes is not easy, yet it is one way to answer: can erectile dysfunction be cured? 

Please, consult with a healthcare provider to determine the best treatment plan for you. 

For some, medications [sildenafil – Viagra, vardenafil – Levitra, and tadalafil – Cialis] are effective in treating ED. Yet, for others this is not a possibility. Learn the best way to manage your ED by learning what is happening in your body. 

Get comfortable with touching your skin, the largest organ full of sensation so that you can awaken a full-body type of orgasmic experience.

Yet in other cases, erectile dysfunction does not have a cure, because it is a more serious underlying condition. 

 

Curious to start your journey?

Stiff: Solutions for Erectile Dysfunction On-Demand Webinar

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Erectile Dysfunction Therapist Solutions for Valentine’s Day

Erectile Dysfunction Therapist Solutions for Valentine’s Day

 

Erectile dysfunction and Valentine’s Day can be a hard problem. Valentine’s Day – celebrated on February 14th – is dedicated to expressing love and affection to those that are important to us. 

Today, we are going to talk about things to do instead of focusing on your erectile dysfunction for Valentine’s day.  

Here are a few ideas for Valentine’s Day to do instead of having sex, 

  1. Valentines Crafts: Provide some ideas to your partner for DIY Valentines, such as homemade wreaths and decor for the home. Erotic energy is also creative energy!
  2. Read traditions: What are the origins of Valentine’s Day customs around the world! Some people really enjoy the story and this is such a great distraction from erectile dysfunction on the holiday. 
  3. Gift ideas: Share some thoughtful gift ideas with your significant other, such as massage coupons, a romantic getaway, or a special piece of art you make together.
  4. Date night ideas: Offer suggestions for unique date night ideas, such as a cooking class, a cheese tasting, or an escape room. Don’t focus on intimacy. 

Remember to keep your partner in mind while you customize your plans for Valentine’s Day to be relevant and interesting. Also… keep in mind that Valentine’s Day is not the only day to be gracious and caring for your partner. In long-lasting relationships that have high levels of sexual satisfaction, these individuals report celebrating their love daily.

How to Prevent Erectile Dysfunction? 

There are things to do to work on your erectile dysfunction, yet wait until Valentine’s Day and the pressure is over. 

Making small, long-lasting adjustments is an integral part of enhancing general health.

To reduce your risk of ED, consider the following:

  • Medical condition management,
  • Reduce stress,
  • Exercise about 4x/week,
  • Keep your weight where you feel most comfortable, 
  • Eat balanced meals (not just fatty foods)
  • Seek help if experiencing anxiety or depression,
  • Stop drinking and smoking! 

In Conclusion 

Sometimes it’s hard to be honest about your struggles with erectile disorders. 

However, seeing a doctor is essential if you cannot get or maintain an erection. Your symptoms might not be related to ED yet a medical thing! Your doctor can do several procedures to rule out or confirm the presence of any of other disorders.

Although dealing with ED symptoms can be unpleasant and even shameful, numerous services are available to help. 

All adults have the right to enjoy sex, and a few bumps on the road doesn’t mean your penis is broken. It happens to more men than you think and there is a solution for most cases. 

Sometimes, if you are struggling with ED, you are putting so much pressure on your penis. 

 

Curious to start your journey?

Stiff: Solutions for Erectile Dysfunction On-Demand Webinar

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Consensual Non-Monogamy: Definition, Types & Tips

Consensual Non-Monogamy: Definition, Types & Tips

Although most couples in our culture are monogamous, consensual non-monogamy (CNM) is on the rise. Monogamy means that once you are engaged, you do not have romantic or sexual interactions with anyone else. Yet, we know that around one-fifth of the population engages in non-monogamous relationships at some time in their life.

You can practice consensual non-monogamy in various ways; one of the most important is an honest and open dialogue between partners. Partnerships that aren’t monogamous yet are morally acceptable include polyamory, open relationships, and swinging.


Let’s take a closer look at consensual non monogamy, its types, and how to start practicing CNM. 

What is Consensual Non-Monogamy? 

The phrase “consensual non monogamy” is an umbrella term, meaning its broad definition encompasses various individual connection types. A relationship may exhibit consensual non-monogamy, or CNM, in multiple ways, from entailing simply romantic relationships to purely sexual relationships, or both romantic and sexual. One person may behave outside the boundaries of the partnership or even both parties.

The fact that both partners agree to whatever kind of consensual non-monogamy is used in the partnership distinguishes it from infidelity. The partner does not agree to cheat. Because you and your partner have already decided to practice non-monogamy, CNM is not considered cheating.

There are numerous good reasons to prefer a non-monogamous relationship structure, including:

  • Being able to explore sexuality,
  • Understanding that one relationship doesn’t satisfy all your needs,
  • You want to give love and affection to more than one person. 

Monogamy vs. Consensual Non-Monogamy

Everyone spends a certain amount of time dating before settling down with “the one.” Meeting the one at a young age is a rarity, yet it does happen. So many people have to keep looking before they meet someone they click with. Some people may keep dating even after discovering someone they can settle down with.

Everyone participating in a non-monogamous relationship must agree to its structure to be considered consensual. One of the most common misunderstandings about non-monogamy is that cheating on a spouse or partner is a license. Consensual non-monogamy, on the other hand, is fundamentally distinct from cheating because of its emphasis on consent, openness, and honesty. Contrarily, cheating is a severe breach of trust.

How to Practice CNM

Consensual non-monogamy, like any other relationship, thrives based on mutual understanding, respect, and trust. Everyone should know what they’re getting into and provide their complete, informed permission before entering into a relationship. Practicing CNM is similar to being in any relationship, except for setting initial boundaries, expectations, and wants.

These tips might make it easier for you to maintain fulfilled relationship(s):

  • The two of you have settled on a list of dos and don’ts for your relationship.
  • Transparency is essential.
  • Have respect for your partners’ emotions and talk about them.
  • A primary partner is possible in CNM if you want one. 
  • Non-hierarchical connections are an option to consider. 
  • Expect highs and lows, just like in any relationship you have had. 
  • Jealousy is completely normal, and it’s okay to feel it. 

Consensual Non-Monogamy Examples

It doesn’t work to generalize consensual non-monogamous relationships. Different types of relationships range from  romantic to sexual to platonic feelings between partners. Let’s go through some of the most common types of CNM relationships that I see below.

Polyamory

The idea of love is vital to polyamory, yet instead of being limited to a single partner, it is shared in many forms among many individuals. Friendships might be seen as polyamorous since we often cultivate close bonds with several people at once. Persons who practice polyamory are like those with more than one relationship because they satisfy their emotional demands in this way. Polyamory is not exclusively practiced by any one sexual orientation, although bisexuals and heteroflexibles seem to embrace it the most.

Hierarchy in Polyamory: the Primary/Secondary Model

Primary and secondary exclusive non-monogamous relationships vary primarily because both partners can have sexual and/or emotional connections with others. The passionate commitment to the principal partner in a non-monogamous relationship is equivalent to that to the only partner in a monogamous relationship.

Individuals in CNM relationships tend to be satisfied inside the partnership, yet research has shown that a deep bond with one primary partner might diminish happiness in secondary relationships.

Closed V

Picture three persons, one on each of the letter V’s vertical sides. The other persons in the V are only linked to the person at the bottom. As a result, a closed V involves a single individual having love ties to two others who are not linked.

Throuple/Quad

A throuple or quad consists of three persons, or four people in the case of a quadruple, who are romantically or sexually associated with one another, as opposed to the closed V, in which only one person is romantically involved with two others.

Monogamish

These hybrid monogamous/polyamorous couples share characteristics of both types of relationships. It often works because, at some point in time, one or both parties will decide to introduce a third party into the relationship. In most cases, this is done to gratify sexual desires rather than form meaningful bonds with others.

Because of this, firmly attached persons are more likely to have a sense of emotional safety and contentment in their closest personal connections. They may relax in a relationship or be independent if they choose.

Swingers

Whether single or in a committed relationship, you may participate in swinging, also known as wife-swapping, husband-swapping, or partner-swapping. Swinging is an open, non-monogamous relationship. Reasons vary for why people decide to adopt a swinging lifestyle. According to proponents, both the quality and amount of sexual activity improve. Swinging is a form of sexual experimentation that may appeal to those bored with or seeking variation in their sexual life. Swinging is a positive way to release stress and enhance bonds by some couples.

Kinksters

A kinkster is someone who engages in sexual behavior that deviates from the conventions of their society. It comes from the word “kink,” which in the context of sex means any sexual activity other than “norm” of heterosexual, cisgender missionary with the goal of having children.

People who prefer BDSM and those who engage in polyamory are most likely to identify as kinksters, yet it can extend far more broadly to persons with fetishes and other wants (e.g., pet play, role play, leather, etc.).

If you want to start your journey at home, let us be your guide. Start here

Check Out All Our Additional Therapy Video

Kinky Sex: How to Start

kinky sex

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do