Micro Cheating – How to Deal with Your Partner’s Flirty Habits

If you’re a little uncomfy with your partner’s flirty texting habits, read this article about micro cheating.

Amanda Pasciucco, PhD, LMFT, CST and Life Coaching and Therapy Owner was interviewed for Women’s Health article, “What is Micro-Cheating, And How Should I Handle It In A Relationship?” Written By Jordana Comiter, Published

Picture this: Your friend has been in a happy, healthy, monogamous relationship—that is, until the internet convinced her otherwise. She confides in you that behaviors she thought were normal (e.g., following their exes on Instagram and liking their friends’ “thirst traps”), are actually a huge red flag, according to TikTok. Now, she’s concerned that her partner’s cheating—sorry, micro-cheating.

There are dozens of videos by podcast hosts, dating coaches, and other digital creators introducing the internet to infidelity’s newest subgenre, leading people to second-guess their partner’s behaviors. One user wondered, “Is my boyfriend finding other women attractive micro-cheating?” And another asked, “What about lunch with work wives?”

These examples might sound a little extreme, but micro-cheating—or small behaviors that aren’t quite cheating, but still a betrayal of your partner’s trust—can be just as painful to the non-cheating partner as physical infidelity.

But, the good news: There are ways to address these feelings (and your S.O.’s behavior!) so you and your partner can be on the same page about what a committed relationship looks like.

What is considered micro-cheating?

Micro-cheating is typically characterized by small actions that don’t cross over to infidelity, but often give the impression of infidelity to the non-cheating partner, says Amanda Pasciucco, PhD, LMFT, a sex therapist based in West Hartford, Connecticut. It “refers to breaches of trust within a romantic partnership that do not escalate into physical infidelity.”

Behaviors that can fall under the micro-cheating umbrella don’t always mean your partner wants to cheat; in fact, they may not even realize they’re betraying you. Oftentimes, micro-cheating takes the form of small, unintentionally hurtful actions, but even seemingly minor transgressions can be extremely painful to the faithful partner.

If you’re the one micro-cheating, you might not be going out of your way to have an affair or hurt your partner—but you are connecting with someone in a way that feels inappropriate, wherein “if your partner found out, they would be uncomfortable,” says Morgan Anderson, PsyD, a clinical psychologist, relationship coach, and author of Love Magnet. Choosing to act this way can sometimes be a symptom of feeling anger, hurt, or disconnect toward a partner, she adds.

Since micro-cheating is about small behaviors and habits, everyone has a different definition of what constitutes it, says Jaime Bronstein, LCSW, a licensed relationship therapist and author of MAN*ifesting: A Step-By-Step Guide to Attracting the Love That’s Meant for You. “What is okay in certain relationships might not be in others, because it depends on the two people involved,” she explains.

Still, here are a few examples of common behaviors that someone might view as micro-cheating, according to the experts:

  • Dating profiles: having an online dating profile (even if not actively using it) to see what else is out there.
  • Physical contact: any kind of physical interaction that feels intimate, like holding hands with or massaging a friend.
  • Social media interactions: chatting with an ex online, following people on Instagram for the sole purpose of physical attraction and engaging in their content, or directly messaging someone in a flirtatious way.
  • Flirting: flirtatious behavior, whether it’s in-person (e.g., overly complimenting a mutual friend) or digitally (e.g., sexting).

What’s the difference between micro-cheating and emotional cheating?

Emotional cheating, according to Pasciucco, is a little more intimate than micro-cheating, and it typically grows and escalates over time. “If there is building communication—whether through frequency, pet names, sharing, vulnerability, listening, problem-solving, et cetera—that would be considered emotional infidelity,” she says.

However, since micro-cheating is so subjective to a person’s views and comfort level, one person’s definition of micro-cheating might overlap with another person’s definition of emotional cheating. In fact, according to Bronstein, micro-cheating is a form of emotional cheating. “If any type of physical cheating is cheating, then anything in the in-between [like emotional cheating] is micro-cheating,” she says.

So…is micro-cheating harmful?

Not only can micro-cheating hurt the faithful partner, but it can permanently wound the relationship, according to the experts.

For starters, the person being micro-cheated on often feels disrespected, or like they are not enough for their partner, says Pasciucco. As for the relationship, this behavior can lead to similar trust issues that might result from physical cheating, she adds.

That said, relationships aren’t one-size-fits-all—and people’s definitions of commitment, fidelity, and cheating might differ. The level of harm caused by micro-cheating will vary among individuals and couples because it comes down to the rules determined by your partnership, your comfort level, and the intention behind the action.

Non-monogamous vs. monogamous

An important note: If you’re in an open or polyamorous relationship, it’s still possible to emotionally (or sexually) cheat. Ideally, people who are in open partnerships or polyamorous relationships have established policies. For them, a dating profile might be part of their agreement—but they might be hurt by the amount of additional dates their partner is going on, or by the level of attention given to a third party.

But even in monogamous relationships, everyone has a different threshold for what they consider offensive, Pasciucco explains. Some might be insulted by their partner watching porn, while others might not care because “porn isn’t a person.” Or perhaps, you don’t mind your partner following their exes on social media, but it makes them insecure if you follow yours.

Meanwhile, for others, it comes down to the micro-cheater’s objective. For example, there’s a difference between somebody simply forgetting their wedding ring at home or purposely going empty-handed with the intention to signal single status, Pasciucco says. To determine the objective of the action, Anderson suggests looking for a few signs: Are they being secretive? Do they seem distant? Are they overreacting to your questioning?

At what point am I overreacting?

If your partner’s behavior is bothering you, you’re allowed to communicate that even if your partner views their actions as normal, Pasciucco says. Hopefully, you can get on the same page. But maybe they aren’t interested in changing their habits, and that’s okay. Just like it’s okay if you decide you don’t want to be in a relationship with someone who can’t meet you where you’re at.

While you’re certainly allowed to have boundaries and expectations in a relationship, you might be hurting yourself if you sound the alarm every time your partner hits “like” on an Instagram photo. In some cases, those trust issues can become a “self-fulfilling prophecy,” Bronstein adds. If someone shows a lot of insecurity and distrust, that partner might end up actually cheating since you think they are cheating anyway, she explains.

For those that have encountered betrayal or infidelity in the past, you might be particularly scared of cheating—which is understandable. Many people go into a new relationship and second-guess their partner’s actions. They think they’ll behave the same way an ex did, says Bronstein. “Because you’re on edge, you look at that new person as guilty until proven innocent, rather than innocent until proven guilty.”

All three experts recommend working through your trauma and fears through therapy and/or productive conversations with your partner. Because if you show up to a future relationship with unresolved issues, it can be hard to differentiate between your insecurities and your intuition, Bronstein explains. For example, say a past partner micro-cheated through texting interactions, you might overanalyze or overreact to a future partner’s phone use, adds Anderson.

What should I do if my partner is micro-cheating on me?

When you believe your partner is micro-cheating on you, all three experts advise having an open, honest, and direct conversation with them. And they have a few tips for doing so:

1. Set rules/boundaries ahead of time.

This one’s more of a preventative measure, but since every relationship is different, it’s important to establish ground rules. If you’re entering a polyamorous and/or open relationship, have an explicit conversation about what your boundaries are. And if you’re in a monogamous relationship, discuss what monogamy and exclusivity mean to both of you.

“If you want to have a long-lasting, healthy relationship, having a conversation about the bounds of fidelity in their relationship is a really important place to start to get closer,” Pasciucco says. “And if you’ve never explicitly said things are problematic to you, you’re just assuming your partner has been in your brain your whole life.” Spoiler alert: They’re not, so if you haven’t had that conversation, it’s time to pencil it in.

Bronstein even recommends documenting the agreed-upon boundaries to refer back to. Whether that means a few bullet points in your notes app or a signed, hand-written note, creating some kind of “relationship bible” or “contract” is key to clear communication.

2. Approach your conversation calmly.

Rather than show up with anger, be vulnerable and “lead with curiosity,” says Anderson. If your partner has a habit of flirting online with their exes, ask them where this behavior is coming from. You might say, “I’ve noticed that you still DM your exes and respond to their Instagram Stories. Is something off in our relationship, or is there another reason you’re doing this? I want to work on this with you.”

3. Use “I” statements.

Using “I” statements can also be beneficial, Bronstein adds. Share how something makes you feel, and then give your partner the space to share their perspective, she explains. So, instead of saying, “You’re cheating on me by being handsy with friends,” try something like, “I felt uncomfortable and confused when I saw photos of you cuddling with a friend the other night.”

Here’s why it works: If you start by critiquing their behavior, “the other person might get defensive, but by sharing just how you’re feeling, the other person can decide to react however they want,” she says. And hopefully, this leads them to feel empathetic and validate your feelings, rather than get defensive over feeling accused.

4. Revisit your “rules” whenever you need to.

Your comfort level might change over time—and that’s totally okay. For example, maybe you thought you were okay with your S.O. maintaining a friendly relationship with an old hookup, but as your relationship grows more serious, it starts to make you uncomfortable. If you do choose to write up a “contract,” set up regular intervals to revisit and discuss your rules, suggests Bronstein.

Ultimately, while everyone can hope for a positive reaction to a clear conversation about micro-cheating, that might not always be the case. If you’ve addressed how your partner’s behavior has made you feel and your partner doesn’t stop, “you have to be honest with yourself about what your needs are in a relationship,” Anderson says. Because if that person cannot create a healthy, secure relationship with you—or you have different ideas of what constitutes commitment—it might be time to move on.

 

JORDANA COMITER

Jordana Comiter (she/her) is a freelance writer from South Florida and a graduate of Tulane University and Northwestern University’s Medill School of Journalism. She loves covering all things lifestyle, including dating, entertainment + pop culture, health + wellness, travel, and more. When she’s not writing, she enjoys group fitness classes, wholesome romance novels, and live music.

Does Sex Get Better With Age?

Does Sex Get Better With Age?

 

You’ve probably asked yourself more than once, ‘Does Sex Get Better With Age?’ and being curious about it is more common than you’d think. As much as we’re sexual beings, we’re also aware that humans change over the years. Our health condition is not the same at 50 as in our 20s. We have less energy as we age, and our sexual drive could be even lower with age. 

Still, all of this can be improved. You can improve your energy levels, become healthier, and feel better about yourself. So, the answer to that question will be unique for each person. However, if sex is the area in your life you wish to improve, we’re happy to share with you that sex can get better with age!

 

Factors that Impact Sex Drive

The first thing you need to understand is what impacts your desire to have sex and the quality of sex. How you feel about sex can change in a relationship or marriage. Most couples tend to have a lot of sex at the beginning of their relationship, and as time goes by, they start feeling tired or stressed about having sex with their partner. 

These are the most common factors that impact libido in most people:

  • Lower estrogen, progesterone, or testosterone
  • Prescription medications
  • Higher stress levels
  • Low self-esteem or body image issues
  • Drugs, smoking, or alcohol 
  • Diabetes 
  • High blood pressure  

Don’t forget that poor sexual desire may be a sign of mental or physical health problems. It may also lower your quality of life and lead to relationship issues.

 

Sexual Prime or the Golden Age for Sex

The term “sexual prime,” used to describe a young person, is not new. Sex is still fun as we age, contrary to popular belief. A lot of people in their 60s, 70s, and 80s+ are having fulfilling sexual relationships that enhance their general happiness and well-being.

There is a simple explanation for that! Our sense of power, assertiveness, confidence, and body image change as we age. These elements greatly improve our closeness, connection, and enjoyment of experiences.

Overall enjoyment and the quality of sex increase with age, even though the frequency of sexual activity may naturally decline. Therefore, the quality of the relationship you build with your partner is more important than the frequency of your intercourse or the number of orgasms you have. Another thing you’ll need to be aware of is that you and your spouse must accept that your bodies are changing with age and that there’s nothing wrong with it. 

 

How to Enjoy Sex More

If you’re determined to enjoy sex more, go for it! After all, you’ve probably had a certain amount of sexual experiences, which can help you choose your preferred sex style, positions, or anything else you’d like to try with your partner. Below, you can find suggestions that are worth exploring with your sexual partner to ensure you both enjoy sex more.

 

1.Take it Slow

Giving yourself and your partner some extra time for sex is crucial. Our sexual response cycle, or the interval between being aroused and engaging in sexual action, slows down as we get older. Women, in particular, could need extra time and attention to get to the point where their bodies are completely relaxed and aroused. A good piece of advice is to delay sexual activity until the morning or afternoon if you or your partner have medical issues with symptoms that intensify at night.

 

2. Use What You Have

The good news is that if you dislike sex toys, you can utilize nearly anything that is on your bed. For instance, using a pillow or a blanket can provide more comfort and create a new angle for the penetrating partner. You can use certain clothing items, such as ties, to tie your partner up or cover their eyes. If your partner loves sexy lingerie, why not surprise him one night? Or, you can even go shopping together and choose something that you both like. 

 

3. Seek New Ways to Connect

Intimacy and sex should be redefined, and partners need to be flexible with this and not make a big deal about the things that might not work immediately. Some things take more time than others. Approach this as an experiment for both of you! Try new things and adapt to them as you go. 

 

4. Have a Positive Mindset

Who said that the best era of your sexual life had ended? The best sex is yet to come! 

Don’t forget that, as we age, we occasionally start to feel a little more confident in ourselves. A healthier sexual life is also facilitated by people’s tendency to lose interest in some of those less significant things as they get older. That leaves enough room and energy to focus on the real connection between the two partners and enjoy your entire relationship, including sex!

 

Conclusion

Yes, sex can get better with age! There is no doubt about it. If there is something preventing you from enjoying sex at any age, the best thing you can do is talk to your partner and to your doctor if you’re suspecting health issues. On the other hand, besides eliminating the obstacles, do your best to connect with your partner. Talk more about the things you need in a relationship and in bed. Also, don’t take sex too seriously. Some things you try with your partner will not produce the satisfaction you were expecting, and that’s totally okay. 

Sex is about exploring your own sexuality and learning more about your partner’s. Forget about the age and make the most of the sexual experiences you have! Sometimes, you just need to relax and be curious about the intimacy you and your partner are building together, whether it’s through sex, hugging, or a conversation. Anything that brings you closer together will bring you more satisfaction in bed as well. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Relationship Therapist Near Me: How to Get Help Right Away

Relationship Therapist Near Me: How to Get Help Right Away

 

If you were looking for a ‘Relationship therapist near me’ on Google, you’re determined to start going to therapy sessions. Regardless of your reason for seeking therapy, finding a good mental health expert focused on relationships and marriages is now easier. You can easily find a therapist in your area, read other clients’ reviews, or even learn more about the therapist on their website.

Consider online sessions if you’re in a rush and want to talk to someone as soon as possible. This will give you more options to choose from, and you’ll likely find a therapist to talk to, even on the same day. To help you choose the right relationship therapist, we’ve decided to take a closer look into how to tell a great therapist from an average one and what else you should pay attention to when making the choice. 

 

What Is Relationship Therapy? 

Relationship therapy, sometimes referred to as couples therapy or counseling, is a kind of psychotherapy that aims to assist clients in strengthening their love relationships. By working with a therapist, couples can address problems in their relationships, practice communication, enhance their relationships, and settle disputes.

Relationship therapy may be beneficial at any point in a relationship, even though it’s frequently utilized to address issues. Counseling that enhances communication and connection can still benefit those in pleasant, healthy relationships.

 

What Does a Relationship Therapist Do? 

It’s crucial to recognize the distinctions between what a relationship therapist does and what a regular therapist offering individual therapy does. Relationship issues might occasionally resolve themselves if one partner seeks private therapy to address their issues. However, a relationship therapist aims to improve the quality of the relationship by talking to both partners. 

Often, one or both partners lack certain skills to build a quality relationship. Learning how to communicate, listen, compromise, and trust are not skills we all possess at the same level. Without them, the relationship might become complicated and often toxic. To avoid getting to that point, partners tend to seek a relationship therapist, whether online or in person, to work on those areas and strengthen their bond. 

If you’re not sure how a relationship therapist can help you, these are some of the things you can expect:

  • Ask you and your partner questions to get to know you better
  • Determine a relationship goal with you and your partner
  • Tap into the certain issues that are causing you to discuss, fight, or isolate from each other
  • Suggest exercises on the spot or at home to better understand each other
  • Teach you techniques to use when focused on a similar challenge or situation
  • Dig deeper into your past romantic and family-related experiences to understand why you react or feel a certain way

 

Benefits of Relationship Therapy

Relationship therapy is really effective, especially if couples seek help before issues are too severe or complex to handle on their own. Couples that seek relationship therapy before allowing conflicts to develop should anticipate some of the following advantages:

  • They will have better and healthier communication practices
  • Couples will be more equipped to decide important matters together
  • Spouses or partners will be able to handle problems more easily
  • Learning healthy conflict-resolution techniques (e.g., improving listening skills and spotting misconceptions)
  • Help couples understand their true intentions and needs

 

What to Expect from Your First Session

If you’re thinking about getting counseling, you undoubtedly want to know how relationship therapy works. Therapy sessions will probably not be extremely confrontational in the beginning. This is due to the fact that relationship therapy starts with your therapist asking you and your partner questions to learn about your background and the causes of your marital or relationship issues.

Every partner will get an opportunity to speak and present their perspective. The relationship therapist could even ask for separate sessions from each spouse after the first one so that they can discuss things that they might not feel comfortable discussing with their partner.

 

How to Find a Relationship Therapist

A variety of professionals, such as licensed clinical social workers, licensed counselors, registered marital and family therapists, and clinical psychologists, can provide relationship therapy. Though their term refers to “marriage,” keep in mind that relationship therapy is beneficial to single people as well. However, if you really want someone who is experienced in relationship topics, you will want to seek a relationship therapist. 

Asking friends and family for recommendations can be a more successful method of starting your search for a therapist, even if most people’s first instinct when seeking one is to head online. There are dozens of licensed therapists in your area, so choosing one should not be difficult. If you want to broaden your choice and seek a certain profile of therapist regardless of their working area, consider online sessions, which are equally efficient and could help you with anything you need.

 

Online Relationship Counseling

If you and your partner find that traditional in-person therapy isn’t working or isn’t possible, online therapy may be a great alternative. There are several reasons to consider trying online counseling. For instance, your spouse and you don’t share a residence. This may be relevant to those in long-distance relationships or separated individuals contemplating a permanent break. 

Or, you have to travel quite a bit for work. Thanks to online choices, people may benefit from therapy regardless of their location or how hectic their calendar is. Sometimes, traditional treatment does not feel comfortable for you or your partner. For some people, receiving therapy in person might be difficult, awkward, or even anxiety-inducing. Relationship counseling may be easier to obtain with web-based tools.

 

Work Together Towards Your Relationship Goal

You could discover that counseling is beneficial if your relationship is having problems. A therapist may help you and your spouse identify the underlying causes of your issues, develop fresh lines of communication, and fortify your bond.

You and your partner may resolve any issues you may be facing and strengthen your relationship by agreeing to seek therapy together. Talk to each other and choose the therapist together. Don’t forget that relationships require work, and sometimes, getting help from a relationship expert is just what you need to feel closer to each other and become more intimate than ever before. 

 

Couples Communication Strategies

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

How To Convince Someone To Go To Therapy With You

How To Convince Someone To Go To Therapy With You

 

If you’re in a relationship or a marriage, you have experienced the good and the bad and might be wondering how to convince someone to go to therapy with you. No relationship is perfect, and it requires a lot of communication to understand each other’s needs and wants, so talking to someone who might guide you both to become the couple you want to be could be the solution you need.

If your partner or spouse doesn’t feel as strongly about the benefits of therapy as you do, give them some time. In the meantime, do your best to share everything they will get from sessions and work with you on strengthening your union.

 

The Power of Couples Therapy

Marital therapy, couples counseling, and couples therapy are other names for couples therapy. It’s a form of family therapy that can help examine why two individuals disagree. This kind of relationship therapy also emphasizes communication skill improvement for a romantic relationship to recover and flourish. Marital counseling or couples therapy may have numerous advantages when two people are committed to it. It may play a crucial role in establishing a partnership based on trust, respect, and concern for one another.

The advantages of relationship therapy can vary depending on the pair seeking assistance. The greater the level of commitment both you and your partner are prepared to make to your relationship, the more likely it is to succeed.

Having someone you both trust is essential when looking for a competent couples therapist. After hearing what you both say, your therapist may provide frank, fair, and impartial comments. Hearing what someone else says about our relationship gives us a fresh perspective. That impartial third person can hear all sides and provide you with insightful comments and suggestions on different areas of your relationship or marriage. 

 

How to Convince Your Partner/Spouse to Go to Therapy with You

If you’re certain that you want to try therapy, yet your partner doesn’t agree, be patient. There are certain things you can do to help your partner understand how therapy can make your relationship and your individual lives better. 

 

  • Ask Them Why

Before judging or encouraging your partner to try couples therapy with you, ask them for their reasons. Why don’t they like therapy? Are they afraid of something? What do they think might happen? Understanding why your partner doesn’t consider couples therapy a good idea might help you understand each other better. Once you know their reasons, it will be much easier to know your options.

 

  • Share Your Reasons

Oftentimes, your partner might assume that by going to therapy, you’re expressing your unhappiness about the relationship. Explain to them the real reasons why you think therapy would benefit your relationship. For instance, you might want to feel closer to them, work on setting boundaries that would work for both of you, or look to solve a recurring argument in a relationship.

 

  • Connect with a Couple That Goes to Therapy

Do you have a friend who went to or is going to couples therapy with their partner? If they are willing to share that experience, this might show your partner that it’s not at all as they imagined it. Also, if they hear from someone else about the numerous benefits of couples therapy, it might be more effective. 

 

  • Talk about Boundaries

When trying a new thing, especially as a couple, it’s important to establish boundaries. Your partner might feel insecure about certain topics or areas of their life, so respecting their needs is essential before going into therapy. Allow them to gain trust in your therapist first. They might need more time than you to open up about certain things, yet once they feel secure enough, they will feel more open to the idea of sharing more vulnerable experiences or thoughts.

 

  • Test the Idea

Explain to your partner or spouse that you can try different therapists before you commit to the one you both like. Not only that, you can get them to be more interested in couples therapy if you tell them that this doesn’t have to be a commitment at all. Suggest trying one session and seeing how they feel about it. With a good therapist, they will probably want to give it another shot before you start going to therapy regularly. 

 

  • Find the Common Objective

Besides sharing your reasons why you want to try couples or marriage therapy, also try to focus on the common goal. For instance, if you’re engaged, you can tell your partner that you want to be even more intimate with them as you’re approaching marriage. Or, you might want to start working on some issues before you go on a longer vacation together. Framing the idea of therapy as a tool to enjoy something that matters to you both might improve the chances of your partner actually going to therapy with you. 

 

  • Know When to Quit

If your partner is certain that they don’t want to go to therapy even after trying all these suggestions from our list, respect it. Maybe it’s not the right time for them to do therapy. However, this doesn’t mean that you can’t open up this subject with them in a few months. Be mindful of how your partner feels, and instead of forcing a solution, try to be more supportive. 

 

Conclusion

There is no doubt that any relationship can benefit from therapy, even the one that ended. However, we are not all aware of the benefits that couples or marriage therapy can bring to our relationships. If your partner or spouse doesn’t want to go to therapy, talk to them about it. Ask them about their reasons and think about ways you can make them feel more comfortable with that suggestion. Also, if you’re not in therapy and are only considering couples therapy, think about finding a therapist for yourself and working on improving your mental and emotional health. In the end, there are so many things we can give to ourselves without expecting to receive them from someone else!

 

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Couples Coach: Why Every Couple Needs One

Couples Coach: Why Every Couple Needs One

 

A couples coach helps couples and also persons individually in marriage and love engagements. They can provide you with methods to increase closeness and pleasure as well as instruct you on how to resolve conflicts. Without a doubt, we can all benefit from talking to a couples coach. 

Find out what you can expect to gain if you start seeing a couples coach in your area or even online, how it feels to talk to an expert on couple and marital topics, and everything else you might be curious about. 

 

Definition of Couples Coach

A couples coach may assist you in establishing goals together, addressing any issues that could be preventing you from achieving these objectives, and enhancing your daily relationship. They can also work separately with partners or work only with one partner because the other one is unwilling to seek counseling. 

The purpose of coaching is to encourage individuals to identify and achieve their objectives and ambitions. This is the same procedure, yet it takes place inside the partnership framework in couples coaching. A relationship coach may assist a couple in finding answers by helping them understand what’s bothering them in their relationship and their goals.

Through couples coaching, you have the potential to grow and find fulfillment both within and outside of your relationship. It’s a journey that can inspire and motivate you, as individuals seeking couples coaching often have a clear desire to strengthen their relationship and are actively seeking assistance to achieve this.

 

Benefits of Couples Coaching

Coaching is a flexible approach that can be applied in many different ways and areas. In the context of the couple’s coaching, the pair will identify them, either in front of the session or in real-time. 

 

Understanding the Main Challenges in Your Relationship

Recognizing the barrier to change is the first step toward making a change. This may seem simple, but it can be challenging to pinpoint the issue because of the intricacies of a relationship. Couples coaching can assist you in taking a deep breath and seeing behind the surface to identify the real barrier. You may start working on getting over it as soon as you identify what it is. 

 

Improve Communication

Communication is at the heart of all relationships, and it can often be a stumbling block when something is wrong. There may be a need for more communication or a conflict in communication style. A relationship coach can use questioning techniques to help you identify the problem and the best way to move forward. Together, you can create a plan to improve communication and reach your relationship goals. 

 

Work on Vision for Your Future

Conflict can arise when two persons in a relationship have radically divergent values and future goals. Yet, sometimes, we need more time to investigate and find out whether this is the case. Couples counseling offers the chance to identify your guiding principles and ideal future self. With your coach’s help and advice, you may work on resolving any conflicts and aligning your values and future vision. 

 

Get to Know Each Other Better

Although it can arise in any relationship, long-term couples are more likely to have this issue. Since we are all constantly evolving, there may be moments when you feel that you don’t know your spouse as well as you once did or that you take one other for granted. Couples counseling allows you to rediscover one another and find little ways to show each other greater appreciation. This promotes a happier relationship overall by removing any misunderstandings that typically arise. 

 

Couples Coach vs. Dating Coach

While a dating coach focuses more on the first phases of meeting and dating, a relationship coach assists you in achieving pleasure in long-term partnerships.

A dating coach helps you become more confident in your ability to have conversations. They show you how to transition from shallow discussions to more meaningful and exciting exchanges. Alternatively, they show you how to flirt on a first date without appearing obnoxious or needy. A dating coach may also teach you how to be more sensual and provide you with tools for seduction. Finding a relationship coach who specializes in both sex and dating might be beneficial because not all dating coaches help with sexual confidence.

On the other hand, a couples coach encourages you to be more genuine and close with your current spouse while also assisting with communication improvement. They provide skills like communicating empathetically, being vulnerable, and listening intently. More importantly, they may demonstrate how your well-established character methods obstruct your ability to form close relationships. With the help of a competent relationship coach, you may change your unpleasant routines to dynamic, present-day interactions.

 

Before You Start Seeking a Couples Coach

Use our search engine to locate a relationship coach if you’ve decided to pursue couples counseling. You may go through their profiles to learn more about each person and how they approach this task. Once you’ve connected with someone, contact them to schedule a consultation.

Here, you may discuss your coaching goals and learn more about them. This will guarantee that you are working with the appropriate coach and that this is your best strategy. You can then discuss future meetings, including their frequency. 

When you approach coaching with an honest and open mind, you can make the most of your time together and begin the path to a more satisfying and joyful relationship. 

 

Conclusion

Lack of time, routine, and everyday life in a relationship can all lead to love fading away. Relationship crises are almost inevitable when there is a lack of trust and an unappreciative manner of communicating. Relationship issues can arise even in good unions due to ingrained communication and behavior habits or unreasonable expectations. To restore ease in their relationship, many people, however, never even consider couples counseling. connection to the experience.

Old or unresolved frustrations can lead to withdrawal in one or both relationships. However, couples counseling may assist in identifying possible points of contention in the partnership and resolving long-standing issues. It is really important to have the capacity to handle challenges and resolve problems in a suitable way.

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

How to Convince Your Partner to Go to Therapy With You

How to Convince Your Partner to Go to Therapy With You

 

If you’re in a relationship or a marriage, you have already experienced the good and the bad and might have considered ways of convincing your spouse/partner to go to therapy with you. No relationship is perfect, and it requires a lot of communication to understand each other’s needs and wants, so talking to someone who might guide you both to become the couple you want to be could be the solution you need.

If your partner or spouse doesn’t feel as strongly about the benefits of therapy as you do, give them some time. In the meantime, do your best to share everything they will get from sessions and work with you on strengthening your union.

 

The Power of Couples Therapy

Marital therapy, couples counseling, and couples therapy are other names for couples therapy. It’s a form of family therapy that can help examine why two individuals disagree. This kind of relationship therapy also emphasizes communication skill improvement for a romantic relationship to recover and flourish. Marital counseling or couples therapy may have numerous advantages when two people are committed to it. It may play a crucial role in establishing a partnership based on trust, respect, and concern for one another.

The advantages of relationship therapy can vary depending on the pair seeking assistance. The greater the level of commitment both you and your partner are prepared to make to your relationship, the more likely it is to succeed.

Having someone you both trust is essential when looking for a competent couples therapist. After hearing what you both say, your therapist may provide frank, fair, and impartial comments. Hearing what someone else says about our relationship gives us a fresh perspective. That impartial third person can hear all sides and provide you with insightful comments and suggestions on different areas of your relationship or marriage. 

How to Convince Your Partner/Spouse to Go to Therapy with You

If you’re certain that you want to try therapy, yet your partner doesn’t agree, be patient. There are certain things you can do to help your partner understand how therapy can make your relationship and your individual lives better. 

 

  • Ask Them Why

Before judging or encouraging your partner to try couples therapy with you, ask them for their reasons. Why don’t they like therapy? Are they afraid of something? What do they think might happen? Understanding why your partner doesn’t consider couples therapy a good idea might help you understand each other better. Once you know their reasons, it will be much easier to know your options.

 

  • Share Your Reasons

Oftentimes, your partner might assume that by going to therapy, you’re expressing your unhappiness about the relationship. Explain to them the real reasons why you think therapy would benefit your relationship. For instance, you might want to feel closer to them, work on setting boundaries that would work for both of you, or look to solve a recurring argument in a relationship.

 

  • Connect with a Couple That Goes to Therapy

Do you have a friend who went to or is going to couples therapy with their partner? If they are willing to share that experience, this might show your partner that it’s not at all as they imagined it. Also, if they hear from someone else about the numerous benefits of couples therapy, it might be more effective. 

 

  • Talk about Boundaries

When trying a new thing, especially as a couple, it’s important to establish boundaries. Your partner might feel insecure about certain topics or areas of their life, so respecting their needs is essential before going into therapy. Allow them to gain trust in your therapist first. They might need more time than you to open up about certain things, yet once they feel secure enough, they will feel more open to the idea of sharing more vulnerable experiences or thoughts.

 

  • Test the Idea

Explain to your partner or spouse that you can try different therapists before you commit to the one you both like. Not only that, you can get them to be more interested in couples therapy if you tell them that this doesn’t have to be a commitment at all. Suggest trying one session and seeing how they feel about it. With a good therapist, they will probably want to give it another shot before you start going to therapy regularly. 

 

  • Find the Common Objective

Besides sharing your reasons why you want to try couples or marriage therapy, also try to focus on the common goal. For instance, if you’re engaged, you can tell your partner that you want to be even more intimate with them as you’re approaching marriage. Or, you might want to start working on some issues before you go on a longer vacation together. Framing the idea of therapy as a tool to enjoy something that matters to you both might improve the chances of your partner actually going to therapy with you. 

 

  • Know When to Quit

If your partner is certain that they don’t want to go to therapy even after trying all these suggestions from our list, respect it. Maybe it’s not the right time for them to do therapy. However, this doesn’t mean that you can’t open up this subject with them in a few months. Be mindful of how your partner feels, and instead of forcing a solution, try to be more supportive. 

 

Conclusion

There is no doubt that any relationship can benefit from therapy, even the one that ended. However, we are not all aware of the benefits that couples or marriage therapy can bring to our relationship. If your partner or spouse doesn’t want to go to therapy, talk to them about it. Ask them about their reasons and think about ways you can make them feel more comfortable with that suggestion. Also, if you’re not in therapy and are only considering couples therapy, think about finding a therapist for yourself and working on improving your mental and emotional health. In the end, there are so many things we can give to ourselves without expecting to receive them from someone else!

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Power Struggles in Relationships

Power Struggles in Relationships

 

Power struggles in relationships refer to a competition between partners to gain more control and influence, and how partners deal with it might break or strengthen their relationship. Regardless of how much you love each other, you will almost certainly disagree. That said, it’s essential to keep in mind that disagreements are not the same as power struggles. 

Insisting that only your opinion and needs matter in the relationship can tremendously impact how power conflicts are formed. Whether you are not respecting your partner’s boundaries or ignoring their take on a certain issue, it is something that should be revised if you want to be in a loving, fulfilling relationship.

 

What are Power Struggles? 

Fighting for power and influence may become obvious early in a relationship, yet sometimes it only becomes a problem once significant issues are discussed and not resolved. In addition to divergent viewpoints and opinions, emotional difficulties experienced by one or both spouses can also lead to power conflicts.

For example, insecure attachment patterns might cause someone to cede control over significant decisions due to a fear of being rejected or abandoned. An individual with personality disorders such as narcissistic personality disorder or antisocial personality disorder may feel compelled to control and dominate their relationship.

If unresolved power conflicts are the result of a mental health issue, only a mental health specialist may be able to determine this with accuracy. One spouse making all the decisions in the relationship while the other often feels ignored and unheard, angry, and unhappy would be a classic example of a power struggle in relationships.

 

Signs of Power Struggles 

Power battles can negatively impact relationships, harmony, and general well-being. Identifying the warning signals of a power struggle is critical to resolving the situation and creating a more positive dynamic. 

 

Frequent Conflicts

Power struggles can take the form of ongoing arguments and confrontations. These disputes usually center on dominance assertion, control, or decision-making. Couples may argue too much and too often, each trying to get their wants and preferences to win.

 

Control

One partner continuously tries to dominate and control the other in a power struggle. They could try to control their partner’s choices, behaviors, or decisions by employing a variety of strategies, including coercion, manipulation, or even threats. 

 

Unwillingness to Compromise

In a relationship, the power struggle stage is characterized by a reluctance or inability to compromise. Both parties could maintain inflexible stances and be hesitant to compromise or find common ground. Because neither partner is prepared to give in, decision-making processes become difficult and may result in ongoing arguments in partnerships with power struggles.

 

Manipulation

One typical strategy used in power disputes is manipulation. It may entail guilt-tripping, manipulating emotions, or other subtly effective strategies to obtain the upper hand in the relationship. Manipulative actions destroy confidence and create a poisonous atmosphere where authority is used as a weapon.

 

Lack of Intimacy

One spouse may use closeness, love, or emotional support to control the other during power battles. They could cut off communication to manipulate or punish the other person. Withholding intimacy or love can erode the relationship’s general closeness and trust while also causing emotional estrangement.

 

Criticism

You and your spouse are prone to getting defensive toward one another as a result of power disputes. It’s challenging to maintain your composure when you’re questioning your ability to function as a cohesive unit. Being locked off might make people more critical of one another’s intentions, words, and deeds.

When criticism is delivered without a real apology or an effort to mend the connection, it damages your friendship permanently. To get over this phase of a power struggle, you and your spouse need to identify what is causing you to defend yourself. Relationships thrive when vulnerability, empathy, and mutual acceptance are encouraged where criticism used to be.

 

Resolving Power Struggles in Relationships

Conflict resolution techniques are crucial for having meaningful conversations about difficult issues and reaching a mutually beneficial solution. In a partnership, preventing and resolving power conflicts requires active listening, aggressive communication, and daily love choices.

Other things to start implementing in your relationships to resolve power struggles are:

  • Express your emotions; before doing so, take a deep breath to understand what you feel. 
  • Focus on similarities between you and your partner instead of differences, as they are the foundation of each relationship. 
  • Learn to identify your partner’s needs and prepare to compromise.
  • Be clear about your needs and expectations. 
  • Talk to your partner about your different perspectives to help understand each other better. 
  • Value your partner’s perspective, and don’t compare it to your own. We are all different, and what works or matters to you might not be the right option for your partner. 

 

It is also highly recommended that you seek help from a mental health counselor, whether individually or as a couple. They can investigate potential reasons for your difficulties and suggest useful coping techniques.

It’s normal to feel anxious about relationship changes as well. The tug-of-war that emerges during the power struggle stage might harm your relationship. Instead, gaining strength as a couple during this period requires learning new techniques and abilities. It is possible to reach new depths of comprehension, better appreciate diversity, and develop your capacity for disagreeing.

 

Conclusion

Power struggles in relationships can be detrimental to both parties’ general satisfaction and well-being. Addressing the underlying issues and achieving a more balanced dynamic require identifying the warning signs of a power struggle. 

When there is an obvious imbalance of power or when there is a fundamental difference of opinion, partners may fight for control of the relationship, leading to power conflicts.

Not everything negative comes from power struggles. By reaching an agreement, identifying common ground, and using positive conflict resolution, you can improve your relationship and understand your spouse.

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Journey to Lasting Love: With a Relationship Coach

Journey to Lasting Love: With a Relationship Coach

 

In this space, we will explore the ways in which a relationship coach can assist you in discovering long-lasting love and fostering healthy connections with others. If you are seeking fruitful partnerships and personal development, then you have arrived at the correct destination. Allow me to delve into the captivating realm of a relationship coach and shed light on its transformative nature.

 

Finding Out What a Relationship Coach Is 

A relationship coach is a knowledgeable guide who can assist you on your romantic journey, aiding you in understanding the intricacies of emotions, communication, and personal interactions. If you are fortunate enough to have the opportunity to work with a licensed psychotherapist outside of your insurance coverage, you can truly delve into somatic practices that can help you achieve the life you desire.

They offer valuable insights and support as you navigate the complexities of your relationships. By providing guidance and expertise, a relationship coach can help you better understand emotions, improve communication, and navigate personal dynamics.

As you venture into the realm of partnerships, whether you’re beginning a relationship or committed in marriage, a relationship coach becomes your compass, aiding you in finding your true north amidst the sea of emotions.

 

Creating Your Plan for Success

You are going on a road trip and you have a map with you. In the same way, a relationship coach provides you with the tools and strategies needed to navigate your relationship. During this transformative journey, you will discover opportunities for personal growth, overcome challenges, and create meaningful connections. Your coach’s guidance is invaluable, as it helps you construct a satisfying and enduring love story.

Your road trip begins with a map by your side, just as a relationship coach equips you with the necessary tools and strategies to navigate your relationship effectively. Embarking on this transformative journey, you will have the opportunity to identify areas for personal growth, overcome obstacles that come your way, and establish meaningful connections with your partner. The advice and guidance provided by your coach will serve as your greatest asset, enabling you to build a fulfilling and enduring love story together.

 

Teaching The Key to Connection

Sometimes, it can be a bit puzzling to truly experience the sensation of being truly understood, appreciated, and deeply connected with others. In situations like these, turning to a relationship coach with extensive experience of over 15 years can be incredibly valuable. Their expertise lies in deciphering the intricate language of love, enabling you to communicate in a way that resonates and brings about positive change. By actively listening and showing empathy towards one another, you can effectively convey your thoughts, desires, and concerns while gaining a profound understanding of your partner’s perspective.

Strengthening the bond and fostering a sense of togetherness in any relationship requires effective and harmonious communication. It serves as a bridge, spanning the differences that may crop up and fostering a renewed sense of hope and inspiration. The truth is, every relationship faces challenging periods that put your connection and resilience to the test. During these trying times, a skilled relationship coach becomes your unwavering companion, aiding you in navigating obstacles gracefully. Through their guidance, you and your partner can emerge even stronger and more united, tackling conflicts, building trust, and overcoming external pressures that may arise.

 

Incorporating a Relationship Coach into Your Story

So, how can you incorporate a relationship coach into your journey? Start by identifying relationship weaknesses. Relationship coaches personalized their advice to help you start a new relationship, revive an old one, or find love again after emotional cheating.

Discovering yourself is part of finding lasting love. With your coach, you will discover your strengths, overcome limiting beliefs, and discover yourself. Your well-being and relationship skills improve with this holistic approach.

A relationship coach empowers you to find your own solutions, not to impose them. With their help, you will build trust, understanding, and growth.

As you work with a relationship coach, imagine the possibilities. Together, you’ll embark on an enriching expedition that transcends the ordinary and brings out the extraordinary in your relationship. Share your experience to demonstrate the positive impact of working with a trained relationship coach. Here’s to writing a timeless love story with a relationship coach by your side.

 

Ask about our coaching packages today for education, accountability, support, and guidance. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Lesbian Relationship Issues: Communication and Connection

Lesbian Relationship Issues: Communication and Connection

 

Lesbian relationship issues are unique stressors for lesbians in committed relationships. Communicating with your partner when issues arise is crucial, even though managing lesbian relationship issues can be difficult (before resentment builds). Lesbian couples may face isolation, family rejection, and the high cost of starting a family. 

 

Because our society is patriarchal in nature, lesbian relationships are frequently stigmatized and invalidated. Sometimes, lesbian couples feel unsafe holding hands in public or kissing each other goodbye. 

 

This could be the result of a real or perceived threat. Unfortunately, a lot of lesbian couples have experienced harassment or threats from strangers for showing their love in public. This is why it is so important to have conversations with your partner about what feels safe for you and how you want to handle things like PDA and social media. Many of us have been shamed to not show affection in public, yet it is different with a same-sex partner. In some countries, it may be easier for lesbian couples than it is for gay men. 

 

In addition to harm from strangers, many lesbian couples face issues that come from their own families. While our society has had a large shift around acceptance of the LGBTQIA+ community, many families still reject or tolerate their queer children rather than celebrate them and their relationship.

 

One or both partners often lack family support, which can strain the relationship. This can damage someone’s identity and self-esteem, causing lesbian relationship issues. 

 

Because their families do not accept them, many LGBTQIA+ people have chosen families. It is very important to have support from others while navigating lesbian relationship issues. 

 

Lesbian couples looking to start a family can also face significant financial challenges. Like their straight counterparts who have fertility issues, lesbians are unable to conceive without medical intervention, which is typically not covered by insurance. This may cost thousands of dollars per child for lesbian couples. In addition to fertility treatments or insemination, financial hardship can strain any relationship. 

 

The best way to overcome lesbian relationship issues is to have honest and open conversations with your partner. Being honest with your partner about your feelings, witnessing one another, and supporting one another in times of crisis can create a stronger bond within the couple. 

 

Ask your partner how they are doing mentally, emotionally, and practically. By doing so, you can support each other lovingly when lesbian relationship issues arise. Having trouble caring for each other? Seek help from an LGBTQIA+ affirming therapist. 

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know Melody Atkinson, LMFT-A by making an appointment. Her pecialization is in trauma-informed practices, alternative methods to explore ADHD, LGBTQIA+ relationships, and identity.

Start your journey here with Melody.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Counseling for LGBTQ+ Folks

Counseling for LGBTQ+ Folks

 

Since the pandemic, virtual counseling for LGBTQA+ folks has boomed, making it easier than ever to receive mental health care from the comfort of your home. For many people in the LGBTQ+ community, this can help them gain access to quality care without having to step foot into an office. 

For some queer people, doctors and medical professionals can be intimidating. It can be hard to know if a provider will be affirmative or not, and the consequences of a provider discriminating against someone due to their sexuality and gender are great. This is why online counseling can be a great tool for LGBTQ+ clients seeking online couples counseling.

 

Why counseling for LGBTQ?

Long-term relationships come with challenges. For many, after the honeymoon stage of the relationship, conflict can arise, which can strain the relationship. Virtual counseling for LGBTQ+ couples can help navigate this conflict and teach them communication skills and emotional regulation skills that they may not have been taught in childhood. These skills can help the couple manage conflict in a way that does not harm each other or the relationship. 

For many people in the LGBTQ+ community, life comes with hardships that can show up in relationships. For example, many LGBTQ+ people have difficult relationships with family. This outside stressor can cause relational issues for the couple. LGBTQ+ people also experience more discrimination and stigma from society than their straight counterparts. This can affect someone’s mental health, which will impact the couple. 

Having a safe and affirming space to navigate these issues and learning communication and regulation skills can help LGBTQ+ couples have a more satisfying relationship. This is true for couples of all sexualities, yet especially true for people in the LGBTQ+ community. 

 

How do I know if a therapist is affirming?

If possible, finding a therapist who is also part of the LGBTQ+ community can be invaluable, as they will understand nuances about being LGBTQ+ that a straight therapist would not. If you are unsure about your therapist’s views, you can always ask! Your therapist works for you, and you are allowed to ask questions so you can feel comfortable. If your therapist has a reaction or response that is not in alignment with your values, then you are allowed to find another. 

 

How do I find an online LGBTQIA+ therapist? 

There are a few ways to find counseling for LGBTQ+ therapists. Sites like Psychology Today and TherapyDen have search filters where you can specify wanting an LGBTQ+ affirming counselor, and even searches where you can find a therapist who is in the community themselves. You can also google “online LGBTQ+ couples counselor” and find a practice that looks like it could be a good fit. 

Sometimes people need to try a few different therapists until they find the provider that is the best fit for the couple. This is perfectly normal, and this person will play a big role in helping you mend your relationship. It is important that you find someone with whom you feel validated and safe. 

 

In Conclusion

In the evolving field of mental health, the rise of online therapy has become a symbol of hope and accessibility for the LGBTQ+ community needing care. This has allowed LGBTQ+ couples to find a lifeline and safe haven in a world that still stigmatizes them. This can allow couples to have happier and more fulfilling relationships. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know Melody Atkinson, LMFT-A by making an appointment. Her pecialization is in trauma-informed practices, alternative methods to explore ADHD, LGBTQIA+ relationships, and identity.

Start your journey here with Melody.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

Emotional Abuse in Relationships

Emotional Abuse in Relationships

 

Emotional abuse in relationships involves manipulating, causing shame, disgrace, criticizing, or controlling the victim. Despite its prevalence in romantic and marriage partnerships, mental or emotional abuse can occur in any relationship, including with friends, family, and coworkers.

When there is a history of bullying and hurtful comments that hurt the victim’s sense of self-worth and mental health, the relationship is usually seen as emotionally abusive.

Get help if you or someone you know is being emotionally abused in a relationship, and learn some important information below. 

 

What Is Emotional Abuse?

Not all forms of abuse have outward indicators or cautions. Certain situations, such as emotional abuse, may have an impact on you before you ever know it.

Psychological maltreatment and abuse can manifest in several ways. It can occasionally ambush you and conceal itself in charming phrases. Sometimes, it comes in waves of total stillness.

Many of the clear indicators of emotional abuse and manipulation may be well-known to you. However, it’s easy to overlook the early warning signals that are mild and gradually develop into an ongoing pattern of abusive conduct when you’re in an abusive scenario.

Attempts to terrify, control, or isolate are considered emotional abuse. Although threats of violence against you or your loved ones may be used, actual physical harm and violence are not included here. Emotional abuse in relationships is defined by the words that are used, the tone, and the lack of empathy in an individual’s conduct towards another. Even though emotional abuse may begin gradually, it often does not stop without conscious efforts to learn tools to regulate the brain.

Anyone of any age or gender can be abused. Abusive behavior does not only happen in romantic relationships either. The abuser may be your spouse, love partner, business partner, parent, caregiver, or adult child.

 

Signs of Emotional Harm

Emotional abuse has several indicators. Remember that even if your partner, parent, coworker, or friend only does some of these things, your relationship is considered emotionally harmful.

Remember that emotional abuse is often hidden when considering your relationship. Thus, identifying symptoms may be difficult. Trying to figure out if your relationship is abusive? Consider if you experience empathy and compassion from someone. 

 

  • Shaming and Humiliating

Any act or statement that embarrasses you is in the realm of shame. Shaming may make you doubt your actions or beliefs. Embarrassing someone is among the most overt types of emotional abuse. This might manifest as humiliation in public or as actions in private that make you feel less than others. In the middle of a conversation, for example, saying you are not sure when to stop talking could be considered emotional abuse.

 

  • Criticizing

Cruel or unhelpful criticism has the potential to be emotionally damaging. “Why would you do that?” may be asked. It could also be negative comments about your appearance. 

 

  • Blaming

Flipping the switch or abruptly placing the blame on another person’s actions or feelings is an example of emotionally abusive blaming.

“I wouldn’t have done it if you hadn’t made me so angry” is an example of blame that absolves the abusive person of any accountability.

 

  • Guilting

Guilt is a potent manipulative tool. You could alter your conduct in the future to prevent feeling like you’ve disappointed someone, that you’re not good enough, or that you’ve let them down.

 

  • Accusing

Unjust charges can coerce you into actions that would appease others. You could go above and beyond to show someone you are paying attention to them if they are persistently accusing you of adultery, for example. You could also quit going outside for fear that they’ll find you and confront you.

 

  • Neglecting

Neglect may occur when your emotional or physical needs aren’t addressed. Deliberately withholding affection or subjecting you to silent treatment are examples of emotional neglect.

 

  • Monitoring

Your sense of privacy can be destroyed by monitoring. Monitoring includes checking your social media, reading your communications, and attending events.

 

Impact of Emotional Abuse in Relationships

Studies reveal that the repercussions of mental abuse are equally as dire as those resulting from physical violence. However, instead of noticeable scars and bruising, your wounds are concealed behind any feelings of worthlessness, self-loathing, and self-doubt you may have.

Severe and continuous emotional abuse might cause you to lose your sense of self completely. Gaslighting, verbal abuse, name-calling, accusations, and critiques can gradually weaken your sense of self to the point where you are unable to see yourself in the true light.

Thus, you may agree with the person causing the harm and become disapproving. You may feel like you will never be good enough for others and are stuck in a violent relationship. You could eventually distance yourself from friends and withdraw from social interactions because you think no one likes you.

 

How to Deal with Emotional Abuse

Recognizing the abuse is the first step in resolving an emotionally abusive relationship. It is crucial to first and foremost identify any instances of emotional abuse you may have detected in your relationship.

You may regain control over your life by being truthful about what you are going through. Here are seven additional life-reclaiming techniques that you can start doing right now.

Put yourself first when it comes to your physical and emotional well-being. Give up trying to win over the abusive individual. Attend to your needs. Take a step that will encourage positive thinking and self-affirmation.

If you have spent any length of time in an emotionally abusive relationship, you could think that there is a severe problem with you. However, you are not the issue. Abuse is the act of choosing. Give up blaming yourself for circumstances beyond your control.

 

Leaving Your Abusive Partner

You cannot stay in an abusive relationship indefinitely if your partner does not want to improve or change their bad decisions. You’ll ultimately experience bodily and emotional consequences from it.

You might have to take action to break up with the person, depending on your circumstances. Every circumstance is unique. So, review your ideas and thoughts with a counselor, family member, or trusted friend. While emotional abuse can have detrimental long-term ramifications, it can also signal impending physical abuse or violent acts.

If you feel rage or have an abusive partner, consider asking them to get help or getting yourself help. Start today in the comfort of your own home. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

Free Couples Counseling: How To Make the Most Of It

Free Couples Counseling: How To Make the Most Of It

 

If you think your relationship is going through some difficulties or would benefit from free couples counseling, find out how to maximize the value of this type of therapy. After all, different approaches and types of therapy help you decide what is the best solution for your relationship based on your unique situation.

That said, what is free couples counseling from Medicaid with LMFT-As, and can you expect it to save your relationship and bring you closer to your partner? Definitely! Even one session can be beneficial for couples if they prepare well, provide valuable information to their counselor, and apply what they learn to their romantic lives.

Before going into tips on how to make the most of your free couples counseling through interns, let’s take a look at what to expect when you and your partner visit your chosen therapist for the first time.

 

What Is Free Couples Counseling?

Free couples therapy is exactly like regular couples counseling, yet you will not have to pay for it. As we often misinterpret that what is given for free has no or little value, there are also certain misconceptions about free couples therapy. The biggest one is that people think that just because a therapist is doing their work for free, they will not put in any effort.

Many therapists practice this type of counseling to give back to the community in the best way they can, while others might do it to gain relevant experience and apply for the desired job. Regardless of their reason, you should discard the option of going to a couples counselor and strengthen your relationship.

This type of therapy is typically performed online, and you and your partner can talk to a therapist from the comfort of your home. This is a great option for people who don’t have a lot of time due to their responsibilities or feel uncomfortable sharing intimate thoughts and emotions in a new environment. 

 

Reasons to Seek Couples Counseling

Sometimes it may be difficult to find a professional therapist. Also, one partner may be unwilling to seek professional relationship counseling, even if it’s free. However, when they start talking to a therapist, they will discover that most therapists have a nonjudgmental perspective and can significantly improve the quality of your relationship. 

 

Whether the issue in your relationship is sex, a lack of communication, stress from work, or family responsibilities, couples counseling can help you eliminate the obstacles to your relationship’s happiness. 

  1. Couples counseling can strengthen your relationship.

Online therapy can help you get the mental health support you need, which will strengthen your relationship.  Free couples counseling is a cost-effective mental health service that helps people have more fulfilling relationships and, parallelly, work on themselves as well. Relationships take work, and finding a professional might alleviate some of that burden for you, as we often don’t know what’s the best way to do something or struggle to find common ground with our partners. 

  1. Couples counseling builds communication, intimacy, and trust.

Unresolved mental health problems may unintentionally affect a relationship if one or both partners are experiencing them. Also, each person is different, so finding a way to communicate efficiently is a challenge for most relationships. There is nothing unusual about that, and seeking couples counseling could help solve all these issues. Once both partners have the right tools to communicate, their intimacy and trust will be rebuilt and strengthened.

  1. Couples counseling helps you understand different phases of a relationship.

In love, our brains’ pleasure and desire chemicals do not stay as high. Hormone levels dropping may feel like depression or other mental health issues. Dealing with this is harder than it sounds, and not accepting the new phase of your relationship may cause new issues for you as a couple. With a couples therapist, you can enjoy this new phase and stay connected as your relationship changes (because it will).

 

Tips To Get The Best Of Free Couples Counseling

If you and your partner have decided to start couples counseling, there are ways to maximize its benefits. Together, you can find a therapist. This will give you a shared mission and let you talk about something important. Find a counselor you both like, as personal preference affects therapy results. 

Talk to your partner prior to the session and mutually decide on the topic you want to bring to your chosen therapist. This can save you time, as you’ll know which information you want to share with the therapist instead of going back and forth with your partner to determine what would be the best thing to talk about in your first session.

Also, talk to your partner if there is a need to connect to your free couples therapy from different rooms so you can both have the space you need to share. Connecting from one computer and sitting so close to each other might not be the best solution for one or even both partners. That said, keep in mind that joining the therapy from separate rooms doesn’t imply you are not on the same side. 

Once your session has ended, take a moment to reflect on everything that was just said. When you both feel ready, set aside some time for a conversation about what you could do with the information you just received. For instance, if your couples therapist advises you to make more romantic plans to strengthen your relationship, you can discuss possible date or travel ideas. 

 

Conclusion

Free couples counseling is an excellent way to improve your connection with your partner and to remember what truly matters to you both. Sometimes, responsibilities and lifestyle can get in the way of our relationships, and with the right therapist, you and your partner can fall in love again and enjoy all the little things you used to do together. Use these tips to find the best free or low-cost therapist for you and take the next step to a more fulfilled relationship. 

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

5 Things To Know About Your First Lesbian Relationship 

5 Things To Know About Your First Lesbian Relationship 

 

Being in your first lesbian relationship can be a beautiful time of growth and self-acceptance. It can also be a vulnerable time and bring up intense feelings. Your first lesbian relationship can be an opportunity for you to learn about yourself, your boundaries, and how you show up in your relationships. 

 

  • Your first lesbian relationship can be a time of self-discovery and acceptance 

Coming out can be beautiful and bring you closer to your authentic self. Many people feel more connected to themselves after understanding their sexuality and identity. Meaning, coming out gives many queer people community and understanding.  

Prior to coming out, many people in the LGBTQIA+ community “mask” or hide their true identity in order to survive. It can be a deeply liberating experience to share your identity with your loved ones and the world. In addition, when experiencing your first lesbian relationship, you finally get to experience attraction and love in the way that you may have yearned for in failed relationships with men. 

 

  • Your first lesbian relationship is a time to openly communicate with your partner and learn about each other’s boundaries. 

Your first lesbian relationship is a perfect time to practice relational skills such as open communication and boundaries. It can be very easy in the “honeymoon phase” of your first lesbian relationship to fall hard and fast. However, we need to be clear about where our boundaries lie around things like PDA, being shown on social media, and consent. 

Because of the unique intensity of a first lesbian relationship, this is especially important. Sit down with your partner, ask what their boundaries are, and have an open dialogue. This can make a world of difference in your relationship. 

 

  • Things can feel intense

Your first lesbian relationship may feel more intense than other relationships you have had in the past. This makes sense, as you may have only dated men whom you do not find attractive. Because of this, you may find yourself falling in love quickly and intensely. This is something to be mindful of before making long-term decisions after only knowing someone in the short term. 

“Uhauling” is a term used frequently in lesbian discourse that refers to the idea that lesbians will fall in love very quickly and move in with one another almost immediately (hence the “uhaul”). This term is often used in a humorous manner, but it is a real phenomenon that happens in lesbian relationships. 

 

  • Gender roles look different (or don’t apply)

If you are in a lesbian relationship for the first time, you may find yourself perplexed about navigating a relationship without gender roles. In queer relationships, gender roles are not as strictly defined. You may find yourself unclear about what tasks your partner expects of you and what you expect of them. This is another opportunity to get to know each other better by figuring out what works for you as a couple. 

Some lesbian couples will take on more traditional roles where one partner is the homemaker and the other partner works. Some couples will split things up more evenly around the home so that they can both prioritize their careers. It all depends on what works for you and your partner. 

 

  • Now is the time to build a support system

Navigating your first lesbian relationship can be emotionally challenging, and it is extremely important that you have people in your life who can help support you through this time. Friends and family who are safe and affirming can be integral steps to healing. It is very important to not solely rely on your partner to support you emotionally so that you don’t become isolated within your relationship. 

Many people in the LGBTQ+ community will find other people in the community to lean on at this time. 

 

One final thought

There is not nearly enough representation in the media for lesbians, and if you are struggling to navigate your first lesbian relationship, you are not alone. Consider seeking out an LGBTQ+ affirming therapist to help you navigate your emotions and connect you with others in your community. 

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know Melody Atkinson, LMFT-A by making an appointment. Her pecialization is in trauma-informed practices, alternative methods to explore ADHD, LGBTQIA+ relationships, and identity.

Start your journey here with Melody.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

Is Couples Therapy Covered by Insurance?

Is Couples Therapy Covered by Insurance?

 

If you’re wondering ‘Is couples therapy covered by insurance?’, keep in mind that couples therapy is often not covered by insurance; however, there are always exceptions. Insurance companies must offer fair coverage for mental health illnesses following the Affordable Care Act, the Mental Health Parity and Addiction Equity Act, and other federal legislation. This requires them to cover mental health illnesses as equally as physical health conditions, not deny them coverage, and not impose higher co-pays on these conditions.

In most cases, insurance equity regulations do not apply to couples therapy. This is so because legislation promoting mental health parity treats mental health issues like medical diagnoses. Couples counseling is not comparable to a physical health condition because it is not a medical diagnosis.

 

When Is Couples Therapy Covered By Insurance

When a mental health problem directly causes the need for couples counseling, an insurer may occasionally be forced to pay for couples therapy. For instance, if a person has a sex addiction or another disorder that impairs their marriage, certain insurance companies may pay for marital therapy. Even then, obtaining insurance protection might be challenging.

Couples therapy is not a requirement for plans. However, some do provide it as an extra benefit. Studying the plan documentation is crucial to understanding precisely what is and is not covered. You’ll often have to pick a supplier from a pre-approved list. A deductible may need to be met before coverage begins. Or you might need to submit a request for reimbursement rather than making a copay.

Employee assistance programs may pay a portion of the cost of couples therapy. This might occur when a severe problem like depression or addiction brings on the couple’s issues.

 

Cost of Couples Therapy Without Insurance 

Similar to individual therapy, the cost of couples counseling depends on the clinician’s experience, location, and education. Therapists who are well-known and regarded generally charge more. Residents in high-income or high-cost-of-living locations may anticipate paying higher rates.

Counseling couples may be difficult labor that calls for a specific set of abilities. Therapists must safeguard the welfare of both parties, constantly examine their prejudices, and rely on intricate research from several domains. Couples therapy is sometimes more expensive than solo treatment for this reason.

The expense of couples counseling without insurance can rapidly mount up as most teams visit their therapist every week. However, it is challenging to determine the total worth. Therapy can keep a marriage together and save the astronomical costs of divorce. Even if a couple decides to divorce, going through therapy might save money because it can improve their communication, making it simpler to divide assets and discuss child custody.

Most couples spend between $75 and $200 per hour without insurance. Some therapists provide discounts for purchasing numerous sessions or a sliding scale for income-based rates.

 

Why Choose Couples Therapy

Contrary to the persistent myth that couples therapy is only appropriate for partners whose relationships are struggling to survive, all couples can benefit from it. Working with a counselor may strengthen your relationship regardless of how deeply in love you are with your partner or how well you get along. People who are in unhappy relationships might also benefit from counseling. 

Understandably, money is a crucial factor when it comes to deciding whether you and your partner will try therapy or not. That said, the benefits it might have for your relationship are tremendous. In many cases with our clients, couples therapy saved their relationship or marriage. Having someone experienced in this field allows you and your partner to feel secure enough to share and discuss some of the most intimate points of your relationship. Not only that, a couples therapist will also guide you and provide you with valuable tools to use in your relationship. 

 

Here are the most common benefits of couples therapy for our clients:

  • Provides you with a deeper understanding of the relationship dynamic, 
  • Get a neutral party to listen to you and provide constructive feedback,
  • Have a safe space to speak your mind and hear your partner’s as well,
  • Learn more about your partner and their perspective,
  • Learn effective coping skills,
  • Rebuild trust,
  • Deepen the intimacy between you two,
  • Improve communication skills, etc. 

 

Couples therapy may be immensely beneficial if you want to improve or fix your relationship. You’ll be provided with the resources you need to establish solid, mutually beneficial relationships and communicate clearly.

 

Couples Therapy Goals

The reasons you choose to seek counseling in the first place will have a big impact on the objectives of couples therapy. During the initial sessions, you might collaborate with your counselor to create a list of goals. For instance, you could decide how to make a family or work on creating a budget with your partner.

Learning how to communicate better is a typical aim of couples counseling. For instance, you and your partner could work with a therapist to establish guidelines for communication or disagreements. Several other goals for couples counseling include:

  • Rebuilding affection,
  • Building respect,
  • Increasing intimacy, 
  • Restoring faith.

 

Conclusion

Regardless of your reason for seeking couples therapy, you should try it, as you will notice results even from your first session. To our clients, we suggest a mix of life coaching and therapy because it has proven to show quicker results. However, deciding the best option to strengthen your relationship is up to you. You can always check if your insurance covers couples therapy before paying for the first session yourself. 

That said, we cannot stress enough how much our clients have grown through couples therapy and how it has transformed their relationships. After all, talking to each other with someone else’s guidance and expertise allows you both to look at your relationship from a more palatable perspective. Working with a couples therapist, you will soon notice how you handle challenging situations more positively. Ultimately, you can split the couples therapy cost between you two if that’s the one thing that’s keeping you away from trying. Trust us, you will surely not regret it!

 

Couples Counseling – Get Your Spark Back

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do

 

Prepare for Marriage: Navigating a Shared Life Without Prior Cohabitating

Prepare for Marriage: Navigating a Shared Life Without Prior Cohabitating

 

When you prepare for marriage, you need essential steps for a successful union when you haven’t lived together. This marks the union of two individuals on a journey of shared growth, companionship, and love. 

If you are about to get married and have never lived with your partner before, you might be wondering how to get ready. Even though not living together before marriage comes with its own set of challenges, it is still possible to build a strong foundation for a long-lasting and happy marriage. 

 

Here are some important things to think about:

 

  1. Communicating in an open and honest way:

Effective communication is the key to a happy marriage or any other relationship. Start by talking about what you want, what you value, and what you want your future to look like. Talk about things like finances, chores, and personal space to make sure you are on the same page. When people talk honestly about possible problems and conflicts, they can avoid misunderstandings in the future. Conflicts are a natural part of any relationship. Learning how to address disagreements respectfully and find solutions together is key. Focus on active listening, empathy, and compromise rather than winning arguments.

 

  1. Pre-Marital Counseling:

If you have never lived together before, it can be very helpful to talk to a professional marriage counselor. A therapist can help you deal with possible problems, give you tools for better communication, and teach you how to handle disagreements in a healthy way. Premarital counseling provides a safe environment for couples to explore their relationship dynamics and better understand one another’s needs.

 

  1. Quality Time Together:

Even if you have never lived together, spending quality time with your partner in a variety of settings can reveal their habits, preferences, and behaviors. Plan weekend trips, shared hobbies, and other activities that simulate living together. This can help you see how well you two work together and whether any adjustments are necessary.

 

  1. Talk about Money:

Marriages frequently experience stress from financial issues. Engage in frank discussions about the ways in which the two of you intend to co-manage your finances, as well as your financial objectives and responsibilities. Putting together a spending plan, having a conversation about how we spend our money, and paying down any debts we may already have are all steps that can help prevent future arguments over money.

 

  1. Practice Compromise and Flexibility:

Compromise and adaptability are necessary when living with another person. Your routines, habits, and preferences will accompany your marriage. Harmony requires adaptability to each other’s needs. Therefore, adjusting to a shared life takes time. Be patient with each other as you navigate through the ups and downs of living together for the first time. Understand that both of you will have moments of adjustment and vulnerability.

 

  1. Define Personal Space:

Even in marriage, maintaining individuality is essential. Discuss and establish clear boundaries for personal space, such as private spaces for work or recreation. Relationships can become healthier and more harmonious if both parties respect each other’s need for privacy. While you’re entering a partnership, it’s essential to maintain your sense of self. Nurture your own passions, friendships, and hobbies. A healthy balance between your individual identity and shared life will contribute positively to your marriage.

 

  1. Plan Household Responsibilities:

Dividing household chores and responsibilities is vital to maintaining a smoothly running household. Discuss and assign tasks based on each other’s strengths and preferences, ensuring that both partners contribute to the shared space.

 

In conclusion

While not living together before marriage may present unique challenges, it’s entirely possible to build a strong and fulfilling partnership. 

The key to preparing for a shared life without prior coexistence is open communication, mutual respect, and a readiness to adapt. You can create the framework for a devoted and fruitful marriage that thrives on connection, teamwork, and growth by following these crucial steps.

 

CONNECT: Love Language & Communication Strategies

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do