Stopping Self-Sabotage: Reasons Behind It and How To Stop It

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Stopping Self-Sabotage: Reasons Behind It and How To Stop It

 

Understanding the causes of self-sabotage can help us find the tools for a happy, fulfilled life. Have you ever forgotten your charger and spent the day waiting for an important call, worrying about your phone dying? 

Perhaps you feel like your romantic partner is not listening, so you use more words to express yourself. However, this may cause your partner to tune out, making you feel like you are losing your connection.

Whether you realize it or not, you are sabotaging yourself and every relationship in your life, causing unnecessary frustration and stress. So, how can you know with certainty if you are sabotaging yourself?

 

Detecting self-sabotage

With self-sabotage, the person who is stopping you from being productive, satisfied, and fulfilled is you. Sometimes, you will be fully aware of this fact, and oftentimes, you won’t. You might impulsively decide to buy a big chocolate cake a few days after you’ve decided to go on a healthier diet. 

As we get so distracted with other things in life, we tend to forget that we’re self-sabotaging and think that other problems are causing us to feel this way. This often happens in relationships when you, for instance, feel competitive with another mom in your child’s school, so you’ll get into a passive-aggressive dance with them and try to be better than your competitor. 

This type of behavior prevents you from seeing the good side of that person and potentially becoming good friends with them. However, understanding that self-sabotage is behind all of it and learning how to cope with it is not as easy as most would assume. 

 

Identifying Your Thinking Patterns

Behind each of our behaviors is a predominant mode of thinking. The issue is that often we only focus on the way we behave instead of the thinking patterns that are leading us to such behavior. One of such examples might be that people with anxiety tend to be hypervigilant to any sign of threat, which results in detecting threats where there aren’t any. One of the common examples is also seeing problems as much bigger than they actually are, or when asked to do something, overreacting internally and feeling like someone has added too much pressure. 

So, instead of reacting as you used to before, you will need to start detecting these thoughts once they start appearing. When you notice them, try to use common sense and reduce the noise. A way of dealing with this might involve you saying to yourself that something is not a threat; it’s a great opportunity. 

To be able to affect your thinking biases, you will need to intervene once your initial reaction kicks in and take a look at it from a fresh perspective. Understanding how your thinking pattern works requires a lot of effort and reflection. What are the thoughts that appear often and are limiting you in some way, whether it’s with yourself or connecting with others?

 

Reducing The Noise

Many times, we’ll be so enthusiastic about changing aspects of our lives that we’ll want to change them all at once. When it comes to self-sabotage, you will need to reduce the noise around your life-changing decisions and focus on one at a time. For instance, if you’re constantly late for work and want to get promoted, think about the techniques that will help you achieve that goal.

For instance, you can set up an alarm 30 minutes earlier every workday or plan to go to work with a colleague, which will help keep you accountable for arriving early to the office. Wherever self-sabotage appears, think about the ways you can change your thinking about it, which will lead to changing your behavior as well. 

Apps on your phone can be quite handy for most of the areas where self-sabotage appears; however, if you prefer more conventional ways, by all means, go for it. You can have post-it notes around your apartment or office or write things down in a notebook you carry around with you. 

 

Make Your Rules

Although rules sound too strict, they will help you be more accountable for things you wish to improve in your life. Let’s say you’re a freelancer who struggles with organizing your workload and being more productive. To avoid being overly stressed when deadlines are approaching, you can have a rule that requires you to put all the tasks on your calendar as soon as you accept them. 

If you’re trying to improve communication in your relationship, you can make a rule with your partner to dedicate a certain amount of time each Friday evening to talking about what’s important to you. 

The common error that most people with self-sabotage make is to rush into changing everything and end up with the same results. You need to approach this systematically. Understanding what’s truly preventing you from reaching your goals will help you change how you act and think about them. 

 

Celebrate Small Wins

As much as stopping self-sabotage is a long-term process that often has its ups and downs, it’s important to celebrate small wins. By acknowledging progress, you will feel more motivated to continue changing your life for the better. Going back to the example from the article, if you want to get a promotion at work, celebrate each time you get to work on time by doing something you love in the evening.

The celebration of your small wins doesn’t have to be related to the area you’re trying to improve. For instance, if you have a healthy, constructive conversation with your partner, you can celebrate it with a nice bath just for yourself the next day. As long as it’s something that will make you feel good about this process, you should think of it as a celebration of leaving self sabotage behind.

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

The Best Productivity Tips For ADHD

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The Best Productivity Tips For ADHD

 

Get my Productive Tips for ADHD and learn how to stay productive.

It’s important to learn the ideal times of day and days of week that are best for you to put into these tasks.

Come join me as I explain some of my favorite ways

 

Couples Communication Strategies

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

 

Positive Thoughts for Today to Help You Make the Most of It

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Positive Thoughts for Today to Help You Make the Most of It

 

These positive thoughts for today can encourage you to see the good side of things even when your day is off to a disastrous start, if you’re looking for inspirational quotations to brighten your spirits.

This collection of motivational “keep positive” quotes, thoughts, and messages can be helpful during these uncertain times. They range from upbeat sayings that foster optimism to heartwarming affirmations that’ll help you regain your “glass half full” mentality.

You can write them on a sticker note and put them next to your computer screen, in your favorite notebook, create a visual, and add it as a screensaver on your phone. Whichever way you choose, make sure you memorize these thoughts, as they can be exactly what you need to eliminate the stress of your day and reconnect with yourself again. 

 

Thoughts About Peace

“When you make peace with yourself, you make peace with the world.” — Maha Ghosananda

“Train your mind to see the good in every situation.” —Unknown

“Peace is not the absence of conflict, it is the ability to handle conflict by peaceful means.” — Ronald Reagan

“Do not let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace.” — Dalai Lama

“Peace is a journey of a thousand miles and it must be taken one step at a time.” —Lyndon B. Johnson

“It isn’t enough to talk about peace. One must believe in it. And it isn’t enough to believe in it. One must work at it.” — Eleanor Roosevelt

“Nobody can bring you peace but yourself.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

“If you are depressed you are living in the past if you are anxious you are living in the future, if you are at peace, you are living in the present.” — Lao Tzu

“Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding.” —Albert Einstein

 

Thoughts About Happiness

“The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves.” — Victor Hugo

“Most people would rather be certain they’re miserable than risk being happy.” — Dr. Robert Anthony

“Happiness consists more in conveniences of pleasure that occur every day than in great pieces of good fortune that happen but seldom.” — Benjamin Franklin

“Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.” – Andy Rooney

“It is not how much we have, but how much we enjoy, that makes happiness.” — Charles Spurgeon

“When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life.  When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up.  I wrote down ‘happy’.  They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life.” — John Lennon

“Happiness is a how; not a what. A talent, not an object.”– Herman Hesse

“Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn, or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.” — Denis Waitley

 

Thoughts About Patience

“You can have it all. Just not all at once.” —Oprah Winfrey

“Patience is the mark of true love. If you truly love someone, you will be more patient with that person.” — Thich Nhat Hanh

“A goal is not always meant to be reached, it often serves simply as something to aim at.” – Bruce Lee

“To lose patience is to lose the battle.” – Mahatma Gandhi

“Be happy for this moment. This moment is your life.” — Omar Khyyam

“Patience is not simply the ability to wait – it’s how we behave while we’re waiting.” — Joyce Meyer

“Patience, persistence, and perspiration make an unbeatable combination for success.” — Napoleon Hill

“Two things define you: your patience when you have nothing and your attitude when you have everything.” – Unknown

“Be strong enough to let go and wise enough to wait for what you deserve.” — Anonymous

 

Thoughts About Love

“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” —Aesop

“Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver.” — Barbara De Angelis

“Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.” — Maya Angelou

“The regret of my life is that I have not said ‘I love you’ often enough.” — Yoko Ono

“Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” — Robert A. Heinlein

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” — Lucille Ball

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” — Rumi

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” — Lao Tzu

 

Thoughts About Creativity & Business

“Extraordinary things are always hiding in places people never think to look.” —Jodi Picoul

“To win big, you sometimes have to take big risks.” —Bill Gates

“No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world.” —Robin Williams

“All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them.” —Walt Disney

“The power of imagination makes us infinite.” —John Muir

“The world is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.” —Bertrand Russell

“Art is the elimination of the unnecessary.” – Pablo Picasso

“The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.” – Sylvia Plath

“Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value.” —Albert Einstein

“Create with the heart; build with the mind.” – Criss Jami

“Creativity is seeing what others see and thinking what no one else ever thought.” – Albert Einstein

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

Goals.of Therapy: Ending With a Therapist

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Goals.of Therapy: Ending With a Therapist

 

After reaching your goals.of therapy, you may consider ending your therapy relationship at the right time and with the right attention. A smooth transition that complies with the highest standards might produce the greatest overall efficacy, even though some patients might choose to discontinue treatment early.

Psychotherapy’s effectiveness depends on many evidence-based factors, including a patient’s motivation, a therapist’s interpersonal skills, and their therapeutic alliance. The way a patient’s treatment ends can have a significant effect on how well they do going forward.

Even though they occur infrequently, the final sessions of therapy provide a unique opportunity to connect with patients about what their goals.of therapy were. Psychotherapy can be terminated in a manner that preserves patients’ well-being and encourages their continued development, even after treatment has concluded.

When all your therapy goals are met, learn how to end therapy here.

 

Is It Time to End Therapy?

Unlike our usual interactions, we expect therapy to end. The client may lose attachment to the therapist, and thus they feel their progress. A sudden termination may leave the therapist and client with unresolved issues and negative emotions like anxiety, sadness, and anger. 

Termination can be healthy, worthwhile, and successful if the client likes therapy and its end. Practitioners frequently admit to feeling proud and having rediscovered faith in the therapeutic process.

Before starting termination, the therapist should assess the client’s need for ongoing therapy. Once the relationship’s goals have been reached, it should, whenever possible, move into its final phase. In practice, however, it occurs on rare occasions when the working window has closed, insurance coverage has expired, or the client no longer wishes to proceed. 

 

Therapy Phases

The following four phases, which sum up early and ongoing planning, lessen the negative feeling of ending your goals.of therapy.

 

  • Limitations

The expected length of therapy can be made clear depending on what the client wants. Clients need to be informed that there may be restrictions due to time constraints, client insurance, or other issues if it is to be open-ended based simply on the progress achieved during sessions. Full information is needed for the client to make an informed decision and benefit from therapy. 

 

  • Determining Therapy Success

Ideally, by the end of therapy, all treatment goals will have been met. To accomplish this, the therapist and client must agree on the therapy’s goal. Early goal-setting determines the nature, focus, and scope of the treatment journey and its planned duration, even if circumstances change them.

 

  • Be Aware of Possible Interruptions

Even when they do not want to, therapists may end therapy. In some cases, the patient does not benefit from treatment, or a new or unrecognized romantic, professional, or financial relationship raises ethical concerns. Another reason could be safety, especially if the therapist has received threats or feels in danger, or illness, retirement, a change in home circumstances, or death. The client may be concerned about finances, the therapist, therapy direction, illness, or relocation. 

 

  • Planning for Termination

Endings are common. Instead, plan for it and work together to succeed. As with any phase, treatment termination is similar. It must assist the client in becoming ready to expand on what they have learned and continue successfully.

 

Methods for Ending Therapy

Make plans with your therapist to end treatment as part of your next stage of life, even if it is not soon.

There is no hard and fast rule. If you go to therapy once a week, you might want to cut back on how often you go over time. For example, you could go from once a week to twice a month, and then to once a month until you stop. 

Consider the therapy relationship’s strengths and how it changed over time, as well as goals achieved. Discuss how you can apply lessons from previous sessions to solve problems and advance.

 

Activities for Your Last Sessions

Exercises and activities can help patients and therapists prepare for the end of therapy and the final session. Each of the following exercises may be customized and utilized in telehealth sessions.

 

Therapy termination letters

When treatment is over, it might be beneficial for the client to send the therapist a letter reminding both of them of the journey and accomplishments. Writing a letter to the therapist might help a patient have a good sense of closure. This structure may be advantageous, particularly for kids.

 

Five-Second Game

All benefit from this entertaining exercise.

For instance, the therapist might create a deck of cards with one lesson on each card:

  • List three unfavorable emotions
  • List three uplifting emotions
  • Name three coping mechanisms for stress, anger, etc. 
  • Name three people you can rely on

The client chooses one instruction, and they are given five seconds to answer (this can also be done in a couples or family session). The client selects a number during an online or video session, and the therapist reads the card that goes with it.

 

Final Words

The complete therapeutic procedure depends on a successful treatment conclusion. Termination should be acknowledged as a crucial step in the therapeutic process that may trigger feelings in the client and the therapist. Termination that considers the ethical and therapeutic ramifications will be a beneficial stage of therapy if it is controlled and planned from the beginning.

In the first session, decide on the objectives and how the therapy will end. Regularly evaluate your progress toward your targeted results, and start preparing early for when treatment will cease.

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

Does Penis Size Matter to Women?

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Does Penis Size Matter to Women?

 

A lot of things matter to women, yet penis size seems to matter to men just as much as it does, if not more, than it does to women.

Size continually is something discussed and we want to answer does penis size matter to women today

 

 

 

Stiff: Solutions for Erectile Dysfunction On-Demand Webinar

Women on Penis Size

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Emotional Abuse in Relationships

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Emotional Abuse in Relationships

 

Emotional abuse in relationships involves manipulating, causing shame, disgrace, criticizing, or controlling the victim. Despite its prevalence in romantic and marriage partnerships, mental or emotional abuse can occur in any relationship, including with friends, family, and coworkers.

When there is a history of bullying and hurtful comments that hurt the victim’s sense of self-worth and mental health, the relationship is usually seen as emotionally abusive.

Get help if you or someone you know is being emotionally abused in a relationship, and learn some important information below. 

 

What Is Emotional Abuse?

Not all forms of abuse have outward indicators or cautions. Certain situations, such as emotional abuse, may have an impact on you before you ever know it.

Psychological maltreatment and abuse can manifest in several ways. It can occasionally ambush you and conceal itself in charming phrases. Sometimes, it comes in waves of total stillness.

Many of the clear indicators of emotional abuse and manipulation may be well-known to you. However, it’s easy to overlook the early warning signals that are mild and gradually develop into an ongoing pattern of abusive conduct when you’re in an abusive scenario.

Attempts to terrify, control, or isolate are considered emotional abuse. Although threats of violence against you or your loved ones may be used, actual physical harm and violence are not included here. Emotional abuse in relationships is defined by the words that are used, the tone, and the lack of empathy in an individual’s conduct towards another. Even though emotional abuse may begin gradually, it often does not stop without conscious efforts to learn tools to regulate the brain.

Anyone of any age or gender can be abused. Abusive behavior does not only happen in romantic relationships either. The abuser may be your spouse, love partner, business partner, parent, caregiver, or adult child.

 

Signs of Emotional Harm

Emotional abuse has several indicators. Remember that even if your partner, parent, coworker, or friend only does some of these things, your relationship is considered emotionally harmful.

Remember that emotional abuse is often hidden when considering your relationship. Thus, identifying symptoms may be difficult. Trying to figure out if your relationship is abusive? Consider if you experience empathy and compassion from someone. 

 

  • Shaming and Humiliating

Any act or statement that embarrasses you is in the realm of shame. Shaming may make you doubt your actions or beliefs. Embarrassing someone is among the most overt types of emotional abuse. This might manifest as humiliation in public or as actions in private that make you feel less than others. In the middle of a conversation, for example, saying you are not sure when to stop talking could be considered emotional abuse.

 

  • Criticizing

Cruel or unhelpful criticism has the potential to be emotionally damaging. “Why would you do that?” may be asked. It could also be negative comments about your appearance. 

 

  • Blaming

Flipping the switch or abruptly placing the blame on another person’s actions or feelings is an example of emotionally abusive blaming.

“I wouldn’t have done it if you hadn’t made me so angry” is an example of blame that absolves the abusive person of any accountability.

 

  • Guilting

Guilt is a potent manipulative tool. You could alter your conduct in the future to prevent feeling like you’ve disappointed someone, that you’re not good enough, or that you’ve let them down.

 

  • Accusing

Unjust charges can coerce you into actions that would appease others. You could go above and beyond to show someone you are paying attention to them if they are persistently accusing you of adultery, for example. You could also quit going outside for fear that they’ll find you and confront you.

 

  • Neglecting

Neglect may occur when your emotional or physical needs aren’t addressed. Deliberately withholding affection or subjecting you to silent treatment are examples of emotional neglect.

 

  • Monitoring

Your sense of privacy can be destroyed by monitoring. Monitoring includes checking your social media, reading your communications, and attending events.

 

Impact of Emotional Abuse in Relationships

Studies reveal that the repercussions of mental abuse are equally as dire as those resulting from physical violence. However, instead of noticeable scars and bruising, your wounds are concealed behind any feelings of worthlessness, self-loathing, and self-doubt you may have.

Severe and continuous emotional abuse might cause you to lose your sense of self completely. Gaslighting, verbal abuse, name-calling, accusations, and critiques can gradually weaken your sense of self to the point where you are unable to see yourself in the true light.

Thus, you may agree with the person causing the harm and become disapproving. You may feel like you will never be good enough for others and are stuck in a violent relationship. You could eventually distance yourself from friends and withdraw from social interactions because you think no one likes you.

 

How to Deal with Emotional Abuse

Recognizing the abuse is the first step in resolving an emotionally abusive relationship. It is crucial to first and foremost identify any instances of emotional abuse you may have detected in your relationship.

You may regain control over your life by being truthful about what you are going through. Here are seven additional life-reclaiming techniques that you can start doing right now.

Put yourself first when it comes to your physical and emotional well-being. Give up trying to win over the abusive individual. Attend to your needs. Take a step that will encourage positive thinking and self-affirmation.

If you have spent any length of time in an emotionally abusive relationship, you could think that there is a severe problem with you. However, you are not the issue. Abuse is the act of choosing. Give up blaming yourself for circumstances beyond your control.

 

Leaving Your Abusive Partner

You cannot stay in an abusive relationship indefinitely if your partner does not want to improve or change their bad decisions. You’ll ultimately experience bodily and emotional consequences from it.

You might have to take action to break up with the person, depending on your circumstances. Every circumstance is unique. So, review your ideas and thoughts with a counselor, family member, or trusted friend. While emotional abuse can have detrimental long-term ramifications, it can also signal impending physical abuse or violent acts.

If you feel rage or have an abusive partner, consider asking them to get help or getting yourself help. Start today in the comfort of your own home. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Therapy for Children of Divorce: Especially if Your Child Lives With You

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Therapy for Children of Divorce: Especially if Your Child Lives With You

 

Divorce also affects teenagers, so it’s only natural to consider therapy for children of divorce as an option. Research shows that most people, including most children, struggle because they lack the necessary resources to deal with divorce, despite the fact that it is an extremely traumatic event. 

Media outlets such as newspapers, journals, and television shows regularly emphasize the long-term impact divorce causes, especially on the children of the divorcing parties. Despite making for dramatic headlines, this is not how scientific evidence works. Divorce in itself has no long-term impact on children’s mental health or academic achievement, according to research. The way in which parties treat one another as they are uncoupling can impact all ages of children whose parents are getting divorced. 

Children face various problems due to divorce, but most of them can overcome them after some adjustment. Although divorce is nearly always traumatic, it does not cause permanent harm if handled appropriately.

 

How to Explain Divorce To Your Child 

Children of various ages interpret divorce in different ways. Young children certainly have no concept of divorce, yet they do have a concept of changes in their daily routine. They value consistency and security above anything else. 

Younger children and teenagers may have similar questions: 

  • Where will I live now?
  • Will you leave me alone?
  • Where will all my things be now?
  • When will I see my other parent?
  • Will you still love me? 

Teenagers need information the most. As such, they need a brief but clear explanation. It is appropriate for children to know the reasons behind their parents’ divorce, but not all the details of their parents’ marriage. They are children, not friends.

 

Signs Your Child Needs Therapy After Divorce

Trauma and psychological anguish can have long-lasting effects that can drastically change a person’s life, well into adulthood. Because trauma and post-traumatic stress disorder are frequently invisible, it is important to notice this in others and suggest therapy if you can. 

These are some of the things you should pay attention to:

  • Atypical behavior,
  • Changes in eating and/or appetite,
  • Changes in daily functioning,
  • Lack of interest in things they used to enjoy, 
  • Sudden medical issues. 

 

Types of Therapy

Divorce may be challenging for the whole family, so it’s even more critical for all individuals to have the support they need. Fortunately, a variety of therapy services can assist in adjusting to the emotional and psychological repercussions of divorce.

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), family therapy, and trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT) are some of the most popular types of treatment. Depending on the circumstances, starting therapy as a family might be beneficial to show you are a family, no matter what. 

The benefit of children of divorce going to therapy is coping mechanisms and an increased ability to process their emotions. Individuals benefit from therapy by having access to an objective person. A therapist can support and mentor them while they process their feelings around their parents’ divorce.

A therapist, for instance, can assist in identifying underlying problems brought on by the divorce, such as anger, anxiety, humiliation, guilt, and grief. With this knowledge, you may encourage them to express their feelings securely in a safe setting rather than suppressing or acting out inappropriately. People can better accept and get through challenging life transitions with the assistance of a qualified adult without experiencing long-term psychological issues.

Therapy for children of divorce can help mend complex concerns between parents and their children. According to research, a successful outcome in family therapy after divorce depends on parental participation. A therapist can suggest the most important ways for parents to support their children during this time. Therapists can also provide insightful advice on any possible parenting problems that must be addressed.

Collaborating with a skilled therapist ensures everyone gets the most out of the therapeutic process and lays the groundwork for long-term, healthy family interactions.

 

Conclusion

Much of what people believe about divorce will be different from what they are seeing. When parents provide information intended to assist their children rather than relieve themselves of responsibility or place blame on the other parent, it is easier. In all of this, the help of a skilled family therapist is valuable. They can support in ways that others cannot. 

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Negotiation Techniques: Align Your Values for Stronger Relationships

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Negotiation Techniques: Align Your Values for Stronger Relationships

 

Learn more about negotiation techniques to help you in the office and with your friends.

Using your words to negotiate techniques helps in many contexts, so come fix your techniques!

 

 

 

 

Sensual Meditation: Strategies to Fall in Lust Again

Sensual Meditation: Strategies to Fall in Lust Again

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

Video Therapy: The Modern Path to Self-Help

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Video Therapy: The Modern Path to Self-Help 

 

While traditional books have always been the stalwart of self-help, a new medium has emerged to revolutionize our approach to personal development: video therapy. This cinematic journey taps into the visual cravings of film and video enthusiasts, helping individuals uncover a more communicative, passionate, and pleasurable life.

 

The Power of Sight and Sound: More Than Just Entertainment 

Unlike reading, where one is bound to interpret words in their mind’s theater, video therapy offers an immersive experience. The combination of visual and auditory stimuli can lead to a deeper, more resonant understanding of the content. As many say, “A picture is worth a thousand words,” and a moving picture? Perhaps even more.

We live in a time where body image issues are rampant, and video therapy introduces a fresh perspective. Through narratives, testimonials, and expert guidance, viewers are taught to celebrate their bodies, imperfections and all. The moving visuals reinforce the idea that every body type has its own beauty, fostering a healthy self-image.

 

Why bother improving our communication skills?

In both the personal and professional spheres, effective communication can:

  • Strengthen relationships
  • Boosting confidence
  • More fulfilling interactions
  • Reduce misunderstandings

 

Through practical demonstrations and role-playing scenarios, video therapy provides profound and actionable insights. By seeing the nuances of body language, tone modulation, and active listening, viewers can better emulate these behaviors in their own lives.

Video therapy provides a discreet platform to explore these aspects, helping viewers understand the boundaries, techniques, and tone of voice. It is also great because you have easy access in a place where you are most comfortable.

 

Getting the Best out of Video Therapy

Virtual therapy is different from being in the office. You save time on traffic, yet you get the same insights as you would because you’re with one another. You can see and feel someone’s emotions on screen, so this is why it is a powerful tool. 

To derive maximum benefit from video therapy:

  • Engage Actively: Instead of passive viewing, interact with the content. Pause, reflect, and jot down notes or thoughts.
  • Practice: Watching alone isn’t enough. Implement the learned techniques in real life.
  • Consistency is Key: Regularly watch and review to reinforce knowledge.
  • Open-mindedness: Approach each video with an open heart and mind, ready to learn and grow.

 

Lights, Camera, and Transformation!

Video therapy isn’t just a trendy self-help tool. It’s a powerful medium that combines the art of film with the science of personal development. For those inclined towards visual learning and seeking effective strategies to enhance communication, body positivity, and sensuality, this might just be the golden ticket.

If you want personalized content, check out these videos or meet with one of our telehealth staff. Some of our staff have virtual telehealth availability now.

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

Signs of High Functioning Depression

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Signs of High Functioning Depression

 

Have you ever wonder what are the signs of high functioning depression? Recently, we’ve noticed it has become a buzzword in the media and wanted to offer a closer look into high functioning depression and signs that reveal it. 

It can be hard to explain depression to someone who has never had it. Only those who have experienced depression can genuinely understand the illness.

Different people deal with their depression in different ways. Some people self-medicate with drugs, others eat, and others isolate. While every case of high-functioning depression is different, some traits are common.

 

What Is High Functioning Depression?

This type of depression may appear milder when you are witnessing it. This suggests that people can usually continue their daily lives despite their despair. They work or study well, interact normally, and manage their responsibilities.

High functioning depression, however, can be a persistent and chronic condition. Even if its symptoms are less severe than those of other forms of depression, people who experience it do not find it unimportant.

High functioning depression is less ‘visible’ than other forms of depression. As a result, both medical professionals and people who are suffering from this type of depression might overlook or ignore it. It may, however, negatively affect quality of life, so it’s crucial that those suffering from high-functioning depression can access the assistance they require.

 

Signs of High-Functioning Depression

Your constant melancholy and mild symptoms may lead to the normalization of your high functioning depression and the assumption that it is only due to your personality. Rather than seeing you as having a persistent mental health illness that requires treatment, other people can think of you as being unhappy, depressed, sluggish, unable to have fun or just “loosening up.” Because of this, high-functioning depression might be challenging to identify.

The symptoms of high functioning depression can also develop gradually, with few or no triggers, as opposed to arriving suddenly or after a specific trigger or stressful event.

Many of the recognizable symptoms of clinical depression are still present in someone who struggles with high-functioning depression. However, this type of chronic depression has several distinctive characteristics, such as:

  • Eschewing social interactions
  • Appetite changes (increase or decrease)
  • Having trouble focusing or making judgments
  • Excessive irritation or anger
  • Low energy and weary
  • Losing hope
  • Feeling empty, depressed, or down
  • Remorse or concern about the past
  • A low sense of self
  • Decreased activity, effectiveness, or productivity
  • Self-doubt or a sense of being unable to do certain things
  • Sleep issues

 

Living with depression of any kind, including high-functioning depression, is challenging. Antidepressants, psychotherapy, regular exercise, and mindfulness practice are all recommended as part of a treatment plan that may provide some help.

Coping with High Functioning Depression

It may be quite taxing to have high functioning depression. To help you cope a little better each day, you may do a few things.

 

  • Exercise

It’s easy to disregard your physical health and wellness while you’re depressed. However, taking care of your bodily needs can also improve your mental state.

Try to get some exercise every day, even if it’s only a short stroll in the open air for ten minutes. Exercise increases the “happy chemicals” in our brain, which can make us feel better. 

 

  • Question Your Negative Thoughts

Negative thoughts and feelings of hopelessness are among the signs of high functioning depression. It’s crucial to try to dispel these pessimistic ideas whenever they pop up.

You may perceive things as more balanced, optimistic, and healthy by challenging your cognitive processes, which can lift your mood.

 

  • Connect with Your Family and Friends

While you might want to keep your feelings to yourself and isolate yourself from others, it’s crucial to attempt to keep up a support system with people you can rely on. It may be really beneficial and soothing to simply have someone there for you during difficult times who can listen to how you’re feeling without passing judgment.

You can also think about attending a support group for depression, where you can speak with others who are experiencing similar problems. 

 

  • Do Little Things That Make You Happy

Happiness may only last a brief period for someone with high functioning depression. Because of this, it’s crucial to make an effort to include things that make you joyful in your everyday life.

Try to do the activities you like as frequently as possible after you’ve found them. These may include the following:

  • Playing your preferred music
  • Interacting with a pet
  • Watching a favorite movie
  • Reading a book 
  • Preparing your favorite dishes

 

Seeking Help

People with high-functioning depression could believe they aren’t unwell enough to want assistance and opt not to ask for it. Nothing could be farther from the truth since depression still reduces quality of life even when it is highly functioning.

It’s crucial to remember that ‘high functioning’ does not equate to optimal functioning. Even if they can complete the majority of duties on most days, people with dysthymia nevertheless have some level of impairment.

Even if you associate your sadness with severe situations or stereotyped symptoms that don’t apply to your situation, you may still receive professional assistance and benefit from it.

Early intervention is crucial, just like with physical disorders. Any signs of depression that go untreated might limit functioning or develop consequences, including substance abuse, chronic pain, and suicidal thoughts or actions.

No one should have to suffer from chronic depression when there are excellent medications readily available. First, consult your primary care doctor or other healthcare professional if you experience any symptoms. Depression treatment often includes talk therapy and medication.

Learn to witness your emotions without judgement and come see a professional if needed. 

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

What does Girth Mean? Girth vs Length

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What does Girth Mean? Girth vs Length

 

Have you been curious about girth vs length and which matters more?

Let’s learn the girth definition so you can be sure you’re measuring accurately

 

 

Stiff: Solutions for Erectile Dysfunction On-Demand Webinar

Women on Penis Size

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Sex And Marriage Therapist In Training: How to Help Others Shine

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Sex And Marriage Therapist In Training: How to Help Others Shine

 

A sex and marriage therapist in training can help you with gender and LGBTQIA+ problems. If you have questions about your sexuality or gender identity, they can help.

Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, questioning, asexual, and other orientations and gender identities may also experience stress and anxiety from minority status. Although your sexuality, romanticity, or gender identity may not cause distress, you may still feel stressed, anxious, or unheard. To better manage these issues and express your orientation or gender identity, seek therapy.

 

Issues LGBTQIA+ People Face

Despite growing mainstream acceptance of various sexual and romantic orientations and gender identities, LGBTQIA+ people still face persecution, discrimination, and marginalization. Managing prejudice and oppression, coming out to family, and finding an “authentic” self in the face of society’s expectations and demands can lead to depression, anxiety, drug use, and other mental health issues for those who are LGBTQIA+.

According to research, young people who identify as LGBTQIA+ are more likely to have suicidal thoughts and self-harm, especially if they encounter prejudice because of their sexual orientation or gender identity.

Discrimination includes social exclusion, verbal and physical abuse, and sexual assault. Consequent incidents can cause chronic stress and mental illness. Anticipating prejudice and discrimination can also lower mental health. In housing, jobs, education, and human rights, LGBTQIA+ people may face similar harassment and bias.

The LGBTQIA+ community also faces many of the same challenges as everyone else. Money, sex, in-laws, and quality time are common topics of conflict in relationships, and the same everyday stressors—mood swings, work worries, or poor self-esteem—affect everyone.

 

Gender Dysphoria 

Gender dysphoria occurs when your identity contradicts your birth sex. You may experience severe distress and physical discomfort as a result of this. Gender dysphoric people can change their gender identity.

There are numerous reasons why people with gender dysphoria seek therapy. However, these are common ones:

  • Anxiety and/or confusion over sexual orientation,
  • Couple in conflict over coming out,
  • Gender transition.

 

Therapy for the LGBTQIA+ Community

People who are members of the LFBTQIA+ community frequently face unique challenges, with specific sets of circumstances unique to the LGBTQIA+ community or, in many ways, far more prevalent than in the straight community. Since the legalization of homosexuality and other steps toward a more equitable and tolerant society, such as raising the legal consent age, allowing marriage, and recognizing non-binary status, culture and its views on the LGBTQ community have changed.

Many who come out fear rejection from friends and family and workplace discrimination. Even after coming out, those who are in the LGBTQIA+ community may face assault, bullying, and hate crimes. Any of these can cause stress, sadness, anxiety, identity issues, and low self-esteem.

Whether your issues are related to your sexual orientation, risky sexual behavior, difficult relationships, or any other aspect of being LGBTQIA+ and navigating modern life, counselors and therapists offer a private, judgment-free space to work through them.

If you are experiencing emotional stress due to your gender or sexual identity, therapy and counseling can greatly help. A therapist may provide methods for coping with your worries about coming out, techniques to cope with prejudice, and assistance with other issues experienced by members of the LGBTQIA+ community, such as relationships, marriage, and parenthood, in a private, safe, and non-judgmental environment. Additionally, you can discover new approaches to relating to yourself and others, as well as daily self-management skills.

 

Considering a LGTBQIA+ Therapist

Even though many therapists are capable of helping, LGBTQIA+ clients may feel more at ease with an LGBTQIA+ therapist or, at the very least, with a therapist who specializes in or has extensive expertise in LGBTQIA+ matters. These therapists are located in some towns. As more therapists and counselors offer phone or online services, a person’s search for the right therapist may expand. Gender confirmation patients often see a therapist before surgery. If available, consult a specialist.

Another great option is to reach out to a sex and marriage therapist who can guide you through the entire process. Keep in mind that all traumas, problems, or minor issues can be solved with quality therapy. You just need to take the first step!

 

Come see Griffin or Karissa today. 

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

Trauma Therapist Near Me

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Trauma Therapist Near Me

 

If your latest Google search shows ‘trauma therapist near me,’ this article is for you. It will explain trauma therapy, how it can help you, and everything else you need to feel better.

Everyone has heard “trauma” in reference to horrific events. This includes surviving a car accident or losing a family member unexpectedly. Every person has unique experiences and perspectives. Several factors may trigger trauma reactions; therefore, it is best if the individual reaches out to a trauma therapist they trust and begins the healing process. 

 

What is Trauma?

Trauma is a psychological reaction to a catastrophic event, like a rape or a natural disaster. After a traumatic event, shock and denial are typical reactions. Over time, responses can cause erratic emotions, strained memories, strained relationships, and even physical discomfort such as headaches and nausea.

Even though these emotions are common, some people find it difficult to continue with their lives. They can learn healthy coping mechanisms for their emotions by working with a trauma therapist near me.

Most adults can recall at least a few excruciatingly unpleasant experiences. Funnily enough, those awkward situations still make you cringe decades later. Harder topics include heartache, loss, and regret. When we think of these memories, we feel strong emotions that make us queasy.

Trauma intensifies this phenomenon. Due to their emotional impact, even slight reminders of traumatic memories can be debilitating. For example, just a familiar scent or a vehicle siren can cause uncontrollable emotions.

 

How Trauma Therapy Works

Simply put, trauma therapy is a type of talk therapy used to address trauma’s emotional and mental health effects. To use clinical terminology, a traumatic incident is one in which a person’s life was in danger or they saw another person’s life in danger. Vulnerable people may potentially experience trauma-related issues after witnessing another person’s death. How and why different people respond to trauma in various ways is uncertain. Genetics, temperament, and repeated exposure to stressful situations are all possible risk factors.

Some can recover from trauma without long-term effects. Some people may be more susceptible to psychological harm. Following the threat, trauma occurs when a person struggles to cope. Sometimes, traumatic scars affect individuals more than others who were exposed to the same event. 

Trauma therapy refers to various therapies explicitly designed to address the aftereffects of trauma. It is also known as trauma-informed care, and it is more of an umbrella term that encourages mental health doctors and other health care providers to consider a patient’s past experiences while offering therapy. 

Guidelines for providing the best treatment possible to patients with a history of trauma are provided through trauma-informed methods, which also involve training professionals in the best ways to treat trauma and collaborating with other organizations. 

 

Types of Trauma Therapy

We have not yet covered all types of treatment frequently used to treat trauma sufferers. 

 

Trauma-Focused Cognitive behavioral therapy (TF-CBT) 

TF-CBT is essentially cognitive behavioral therapy developed specifically for victims of trauma. This type of brief conversation therapy aids patients in confronting and controlling their thoughts connected to the trauma.

 

Psychodynamic Treatment 

You will talk about your symptoms and your trauma in psychodynamic therapy. A solid client-therapist relationship is essential for this type of treatment. Its foundation lies in exposing internal problems that the client is suffering from. It also gives a lot of attention to how connections impact people, particularly how they influence their attitudes, feelings, and actions. 

 

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)

The fundamental objective of EMDR is to eliminate obstacles to the client’s progress. External stimuli (such as hand tapping or eye movement) achieve this. The stimulation the therapist gives as you discuss your experience focuses your attention outward.

The information mentioned above may be helpful to you during your treatment process, or you may require more counseling. Additionally, remember that often, healing from trauma necessitates using many types of treatment.

 

Benefits of Trauma Therapy

Traumatic events can have an impact on relationships and life. Its consequences can also make life challenging at work, in social situations, and even in school. Thus, trauma therapy can enhance the quality of life. Before receiving trauma treatment, a client might not even be aware of how much their trauma has changed how they live.

Though it may be difficult to talk about terrible events with a doctor, trauma treatment can reduce symptoms over time. Additional advantages of trauma therapy include:

  • Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) causes and symptoms can be eliminated or reduced
  • Enhancing intimate connections and interactions with others
  • Developing coping mechanisms to deal with erroneous or unfavorable thoughts and emotions
  • Lowering rage, frustration, and irritation while raising calmness
  • Putting the unpleasant event in a new light and trying to make sense of it

 

Finding the Right Trauma Therapist

It’s crucial to locate a trauma therapist with credentials to support this assertion. Examining the therapist directories on the websites of organizations for professionals who specialize in trauma is one place to start. These organizations include the International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation, the American Psychological Association Division of Trauma Psychology, and the International Society for Traumatic Stress Studies.

Finding a qualified trauma therapist can be challenging since there is frequently a higher need than available professionals. We advise visiting a conventional therapist in the interim if you have problems locating a trauma therapist. However, don’t entirely postpone your search for a trauma therapist. 

Recovery from a traumatic experience is feasible with the aid of a qualified specialist. Though overcoming traumatic memories is complex, it is possible. With the right therapist, you will be able to recover from your trauma and live a meaningful life!

 

You can begin sessions now with Chastity from the comfort of your own home. 

Chastity Rodriguez, LMFT, MEd, EMP, PC, CME

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

How to Remain Calm When Angry [Calm Nerves Quickly]

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How to Remain Calm When Angry [Calm Nerves Quickly]

 

How to remain calm when angry is a skillset that many of us arent taught. In this video we will learn how to calm nerves quickly and calm yourself down when stressed.

These techniques will help especially if you practice them when you are in a calm mood.

 

 

 

Sensual Meditation: Strategies to Fall in Lust Again

Sensual Meditation: Strategies to Fall in Lust Again

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

Two hands holding one another - one with tattoos.

What Is Consent in a Relationship?

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What Is Consent in a Relationship?

 

If you’re looking for a clear answer to what is consent, the first thing you will need to know is that it’s about mutually respecting yourself and the other person you are getting consent from. 

When someone gives you their consent, it means they are permitting you or agreeing to express something with you! 

  1. Consent cannot be assumed just because someone is silent, hasn’t said the word ‘no,’ or because the sexual partners have a relationship or sexual past together.
  2. Consent may be revoked at any time. 
  3. Force, threat, or intimidation are not acceptable methods for obtaining consent. 
  4. A person who is in any way incapacitated cannot give consent.

Before diving into this topic, there are a few things to remember when having sexual relations with someone.  

 

What is Consent?

Sexual consent means agreeing to participate in a specific sexual activity. Before being sexual with another person, you will need to know if they truly want to be sexual with you as well. On the other side, make sure you’ve communicated what you want with your partner before initiating intercourse or any other sexual activity.

Both consenting and asking for one serve to encourage people to set their own boundaries and respect the boundaries of others. Also, it serves to check if everything is clear and, if not, to communicate it properly before sex. Both partners must give sexual consent each time before engaging in sexual activity for the sex to be considered consensual. 

Without sexual consent, any sexual activity, from oral sex or genital touching to vaginal or anal penetration, is considered sexual assault or rape. You have every right to decide what happens to your body. It doesn’t matter if you were up for it ten minutes ago and even said ‘yes’ to your sexual partner; you can change your mind freely. Every person is allowed to say “stop” at any time before and during sexual activity, and their partner must respect it. 

You have to be a person that is comfortable and gracious about receiving a no. That is what consent is. If you guilt someone, or pressure them when they say “no,” that is not consensual. That is covertly manipulating a situation to get your needs met. 

 

Sexual Assault and Rape

Who can consent to sexual activity is regulated by law. Someone who is drunk, high, or passed out cannot consent sexually. Minors are protected from sexual activity with adults. Meaning, sex with a minor resulted in jail time and sex offender registration.  

Despite their legal definitions, rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse all begin with lack of consent. All of these involve unconsented sexual contact. This means that sexual contact without consent is rape, assault, or abuse. 

Anyone can be a victim of rape, sexual assault, or sexual abuse, regardless of their age, gender, or sexual orientation. That said, certain groups of people are more likely than others to experience sexual assault. We particularly want to recognize that women of color, LGBTIA+ individuals, and those with developmental disabilities are more likely to experience sexual assault. 

There are numerous ways in which sexual violence can occur. Rape or sexual assault can occur without a weapon, and the victim does not have to fight back, scream, or say ‘no’. Our most common image is of sexual assaults in dark alleyways with strangers, even though that is rare. Family, relatives, and romantic partners often are the perpetrator.  

If you or anyone you know has experienced any type of sexual violence, keep in mind that you’re not alone and that help is available to all victims of sexual violence.

 

How to Ask For Consent

Most of the time, you’ll hear people talking about giving consent before a certain sexual activity. However, asking for consent is equally important in communication between two individuals who will become sexual partners. Both partners need to give their consent to have sex. 

Openly discussing consent with your partner is best. Request it in multiple formats. Instead of saying the same thing over and over, ask your partner if they are ready to engage in sexual activity, and then confirm with them if they are comfortable with how things went later. 

Asking for consent does not have to slow down or diminish sexual desire. While communicating and being intimate with your partner, you can request consent. Although consent is required before any sexual activity, make an effort to communicate with the person you are getting to know more about.  If you are about to have sex with your long-term partner, you probably already know whether or not they want to have sex at that particular time. However, asking for consent implies consent from both partners in a relationship. 

 

How to Give Consent

Like asking for consent, you should give your consent to your partner. That will inform them that you agree to continue being sexually intimate with them and give them the ‘green light’ to proceed. You are not, nevertheless, required to wait for your partner to inquire whether you are enjoying the foreplay. In other words, a person can give consent without waiting for their partner to ask for it. 

Informing your partner that you consent to having sex with them helps you both be transparent about your sexual desires and allows you to connect sexually. However, don’t confuse giving consent with receiving it. You will still need to hear your partner say they are okay with moving things forward sexually to continue with a certain sexual activity. Once both partners have given their consent, you can proceed with sex and make the most of it together. 

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.