Communication Is Key to All Your Relationships

 

How often have you said the following words, ‘Communication is key’? Maybe you’ve said to a friend to remind them that they need to communicate how they feel to their romantic partner or maybe you’ve said it to remind your coworker that it’s always best to clarify everything before it becomes a problem at work.

Regardless of the relationship, communication is crucial to understanding the other person. Without it, we wouldn’t be able to state our needs and desires or understand what our partner, friend, or relative thinks or feels. Even though we’re all aware of the importance of communication, we need a constant reminder that it’s truly the only language that can bring us closer to others and even help us understand ourselves better.

 

Why Communication Matters?

Everything is communication. From the minute a baby is born, it is communicating with the world. Although babies will not use words, their close environment gives an idea of the baby’s needs due to the communication clue it provides. As we start talking, we turn to words to explain the significance of things, people, and events around us.

Even when we’re silent, we’re communicating. If you’re silent in a business meeting, you’re communicating that you’re interested in the topic and that the speaker has your full attention. Non-verbal communication is an efficient way to express ourselves and interact with our environment. For instance, crossing your arms and looking at your phone in that same business meeting mentioned above sends a very different message from maintaining eye contact with your superior.

However, in intimate relationships, communication is even more important. When we’re in a relationship or a friendship, we want to feel close to the other person. This would be impossible without communication. Getting to know each other can only be done when communicating with the other person, whether verbally or non-verbally. So, if we all know communication is key for a relationship to work, why do many couples go through periods of discussion or feel that the other person doesn’t understand them?

 

Interpretation of Communication

Do you remember the last time when you thought you were clear about something and the other person still misunderstood you completely? Most often, we fight when our interpretations of something are not the same. This occurs when there is a lack of quality communication between two or more people, so there is more space for making assumptions. For instance, someone not responding to your text right away can be interpreted as a lack of interest, whereas the other person simply might be busy at the moment or want to take time to respond properly.

The more intimate the relationship becomes, the more these examples occur. In couples therapy, it is very frequent that partners blame each other for misunderstandings. The truth is that blaming another person won’t make the problem go away. Communication is the only solution. We’re all unique and have unique needs. The more you communicate with your partner, friend, or coworker, there will be less space for wrong interpretations.

 

How to Communicate with Success

The great thing about communication is that it’s a skill that everyone can practice. Even if you think that you’re not naturally good at communication, there are so many different ways to communicate that you’ll easily find the one that seems natural to you. Some people love expressing themselves through long, meaningful conversations, while others might need time to think first and they’ll come to you and share their point of view in a few sentences. That said, there is no good or bad way to communicate—as long as everyone is being respectful.

If you don’t feel comfortable sharing how you feel in a one-on-one conversation, you might feel better about the idea of writing down all your thoughts on a piece of paper. With intimate relationships, you can even think of songs that represent how you feel and open the conversation that way. Whatever works for you best.

 

1.Understand Yourself First

Before sharing how you feel or think with anyone else, talk to yourself first. If you feel triggered about something your partner has said, are you aware of the reason for this emotional reaction? If you feel unappreciated at work, have you thought about the certain situations that led to that result? Do these situations have something in common?

A lot of communication stops at finding the person to blame, which is not a solution. Knowing that your partner did something that hurt you will not help you feel better or prevent it from happening again. You will need to understand what you need in order to feel safe. Once you know what is troubling you, why, and what can be done about it, that can be considered finding the solution to the problem.

 

2.Be Clear About It

Different people communicate differently. That is why it’s important to be clear whenever you’re communicating with another person. This is especially true when communicating with your close friends and romantic partner, as we tend to believe that they know us so well that it’s easy for them to understand what we want to say.

A good piece of advice would be not to start a conversation until you’re sure about what you want to say. Not being clear on your intentions might lead to an even bigger problem and the other person might become confused or take further precautions because they’re not certain they understand the issue.

 

Open With a Monologue, Close With a Dialogue

For many people, it’s important to not be interrupted when talking about sensitive topics, which is completely fine. However, keep in mind that successful communication requires more than one person. After you’ve said what needed to be said, show you’re curious to hear what the other person thinks about it and if they have any questions. This will also prevent any misunderstandings in the future.

The best way to communicate is to invite another person openly to a safe space in which you both feel comfortable speaking your mind. If that space is only reserved for you or them, it will have consequences for your relationship. A great way to learn communication skills and ways to express yourself more authentically is through therapy, whether it’s for you as a couple or you alone. Once you learn how to communicate successfully, you’ll be able to connect better with people who matter to you and have more meaningful relationships with them.

 

Couples Communication Strategies

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

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