Is He Cheating + What To Do About It

 

Relationships are filled with a range of emotions and concerns, and one of the most common ones you’ll hear is, ‘Is he cheating?’ It could be a new relationship or a long-term one, but something is suspicious.

Sometimes, we think of infidelity due to our insecurities or past traumas, and sometimes, it’s because our partner is acting weird. Whatever it is, feeling like this is not pleasant. You could start doubting everything your partner does and says. You might feel the urge to check their messages or to follow them. Before you realize it, you’ll find yourself engrossed in this discovery and questioning how you got here in the first place.

So, we will look at the most typical indications of cheating along with suggestions for what to do in this situation. Keep in mind that every relationship is unique. Just because your partner is behaving in a certain way doesn’t automatically mean that they are cheating on you. 

 

Signs of Cheating

If you’ve never cheated or been cheated on, you probably know someone who did. As much as we’d like to be safe and loved in all of our relationships, the other side of intimacy is vulnerability. In other words, we can’t control other people’s behavior. Instead of wasting your energy on controlling your partner, take a moment to analyze how they act. It won’t prove they’re cheating, yet it will reveal their feelings about your relationship.

 

Lack of Time

You used to spend a lot of time together, whether it was traveling, going to restaurants, or cuddling at home in front of the TV. Something has changed, although you’re not really sure why. You’ve suggested various plans for the weekend, yet they always have the perfect excuse. 

 

Change of Priorities

Maybe you’ve been considering buying a home together or going on a long vacation to a foreign country, yet they don’t seem interested anymore. They even have a reason for it. They would rather not move because they just realized they prefer living in the center or they don’t need this vacation anymore. If their explanation doesn’t make sense or you see it’s not true, the true reason could be something they don’t want you to know about. 

 

Changes in How They Look

When we fall in love with someone, we want to impress that person. This is what you did when you fell in love with them as well. Going to the gym, buying a new perfume, or investing in their clothes could all be signs of a significant change in their life. However, make sure to double-check that their motivation is not caused by the simple desire to become the best version of themselves. 

 

Behavioral Changes

There are several changes you can notice in somebody’s behavior if they are cheating. They might start to hide their phone or leave it face down. They might show new social media behaviors such as being active online at late-night hours or downloading an app he was never interested in before. 

Furthermore, some men will start accusing their partners of cheating when they are the ones cheating. This is due to feeling guilty and wanting to distract you from finding what’s really going on. 

When it comes to behavioral changes, just think of how he was behaving before and how he is behaving now. If you notice major changes and can’t find a different explanation than cheating, you could be right. 

 

What to Do About It

Believing you’re cheated on can lead to feeling many emotions. The most common are fear, sadness, and anger. Before you decide to act on it, make sure you take care of yourself first. Whatever the outcome might be, you should prioritize your well-being over anything else. Don’t be afraid to reach out for help, whether that’s talking to a therapist or your close friends. 

 

1.Listen to His Version 

Give him the opportunity to share his story, even if he meets all the requirements. Starting an argument and threatening to leave can become a big wound in your relationship, especially if you realize he wasn’t cheating at all. Do your best to start the conversation respectfully. You already know your version and what you want to say, so allow him to share his side. 

 

2.Address How You Feel

When they finish their conversation, or if they choose not to discuss this topic at all, it’s appropriate to express your feelings. If you believe that someone has betrayed you, you have the right to confront them. Tell them what this experience has been like for you. Remember, you’re not doing this to make them feel bad; you’re doing it to stand up for yourself. If you’re not going to be your advocate, who will?

 

3.Suggest Ways to Deal with This Situation

Suggestions on how to deal with this situation will greatly depend on whether he cheated or not. It’s not about solving the problem; it’s about agreeing on the next steps and conserving your energy. For instance, you might decide to spend some time apart or to sleep in separate bedrooms. You could decide to seek relationship counseling and get professional support during these difficult times. You could even discuss long-term expectations to remind each other what the end goal of the path you’re deciding to take is. 

 

4.Begin the Healing Process

Alone or with him, you will need to start to heal. Infidelity or doubts of infidelity can trigger so many things inside you, and you will need time and space to express that. Talk to a therapist, write a journal, or spend more time with your close friends. Prioritizing yourself is essential to healing. You might feel tempted to focus on him and your relationship, yet you’re the one who needs that level of care and support. 

Even in situations in which the partner was actually not unfaithful, you were still afraid and angry. You still believed you’d lose your relationship. That part of you deserves to be taken care of. In fact, ensuring you’re both taking care of your needs first will help you see with more clarity what steps make the most sense for you in the future. 

 

Begin the journey to help now with one of our staff members. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

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