How Do I Forgive Someone & Move On?
How Do I Forgive Someone & Move On?
If you’re wondering how do I forgive someone, you’ve come to the correct place. Some things are easier to forgive, while others are not so much. Whether you are able to forgive someone also depends on how close you are to that person and the act or words that caused you harm. Without a doubt, forgiveness is a complex topic.
Learn the best way to forgive someone and how it can allow you to live your life peacefully. This article also explains how to prepare yourself to forgive someone and how to share it with them.
Forgive or Not to Forgive?
Before we get into the steps of forgiveness, let’s take a moment to see how to determine whether or not you should forgive someone who did you wrong. This person might have lied to you, betrayed you, or hidden something from you. Whatever it was, you were hurt, and now you’re uncertain whether you should forgive them or not.
Consider the following questions to determine whether forgiveness is possible:
- Was the harm intentional or accidental?
- Have they taken full responsibility without deflecting blame?
- Did they make any effort to repair the damage or make amends?
- Are they expressing sincere remorse, or are they primarily concerned about the consequences?
- Do you feel safe around them now?
- Are they willing to do the work needed to rebuild trust?
- Is forgiveness something you’re doing for them or yourself?
How to Forgive Someone Important to You
Forgiving someone important to you can be tough because the hurt often cuts deeper. Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or excusing the harm. It’s about freeing yourself from resentment and choosing peace over pain. Before jumping to the forgiveness part, you should ensure you’ve taken care of your emotional well-being first.
1.Acknowledge How You Feel
Even if somebody hurts us unintentionally, it still hurts. Don’t put yourself in their shoes until you’ve truly felt how it feels to be in your own. Many people will try to avoid the discomfort they feel after being hurt, and they might jump to empathize with or forgive the person right away.
Instead, allow yourself to feel the pain. Familiarize yourself with the emotions you’re feeling and give them time to show up in different ways. Ask yourself how to support yourself more during this period, whether that’s through journaling, talking to your best friend, crying while watching sad movies, or listening to heartbreaking music.
2.Understanding Over Justifying
As much as you might love this person, don’t justify their actions or words. It’s one thing to think about why they did something and another to justify them completely. Justification takes away their responsibility, and it doesn’t allow you to truly heal.
Being curious about the context of their behavior can help you see this person from a different perspective. Does what they did change how you see them as a person? Could you please let me know if there were any indicators before the oversight? Are they likely to repeat this behavior?
3.Deciding If You Want to Forgive
What is your motivation for forgiveness? Are you only trying to move past this awkward situation between the two of you? Do you feel under pressure to forgive what this person or other people in your life have done to you?
Understanding whether the forgiveness is an opportunity to strengthen the relationship or not is also crucial for your well-being. If you’re scared that they’ll do the same thing again or you’re uncertain if they feel remorse, you’re not ready to forgive them. Take more time for yourself, regardless of what anyone might say or think about it.
4.Having a Heart-to-Heart Conversation
Before you forgive them, make sure you have a conversation with them when you feel ready. Be very clear on what you want to say, yet be open to hearing their side of the story. Letting them say how this experience was for them in their own words can give you a better understanding of the person in front of you.
An open, honest dialogue is not the solution to your problem, yet it is a useful tool to assess the situation better. Are they aware of the impact this had on you? Could you please let us know what steps they are prepared to take to prevent this from occurring in the future? Lastly, don’t forget that you don’t have to forgive them during the conversation. You can take some time to digest this information first and then revise how you feel about forgiving them.
5.Releasing Anger
Forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to forget what has been done to you. But if you want to repair a relationship with someone who hurt you, you must do so without anger, revenge, or resentment. Forgiveness requires letting go of the thing that happened and focusing on repair.
If you forgive them yet feel angry about it, it only means your forgiveness was premature. It’s crucial to honor your emotional process, even if it takes you longer than you expected.
Forgiving Someone Who’s Not Here Anymore
This often happens when people try to deal with their childhood traumas in adulthood, yet one or both parents are no longer alive. You might wonder if it is possible to forgive a person who is no longer alive and receive your forgiveness. The answer is yes, of course.
Forgiveness is mostly dependent on how you feel about something and if you’re ready to forgive. Even if a person is not here to correct their wrongs, it doesn’t mean you can’t forgive them and let go of that burden.
That said, make sure you’re not making yourself forgive someone just because they’re not alive anymore. You have every right to feel frustrated, sad, or betrayed, and ignoring your feelings will only hurt you. If you want to talk about it, we are here to help.
Conclusion
Forgiveness is essential for moving on because it frees us from the emotional weight of anger, resentment, and pain. Holding onto past hurts keeps us in a cycle of suffering, while forgiveness creates space for healing, growth, and peace. It doesn’t mean condoning what happened or forgetting the impact; it means choosing not to let the wound define your future. By releasing blame, we reclaim our power, paving the way for emotional clarity and deeper self-respect. Forgiveness is not a favor to the one who hurt us, but a gift we give ourselves to move forward with a lighter heart.
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