How to Define Parasocial Relationships & How They Impact Us

 

If you’re uncertain how to define parasocial relationships, think of it as a deep connection towards influencers, celebrities, or fictional characters. Feeling a certain connection to a person you don’t actually know is not new, although many assume it resulted from social media. Before, people felt that type of connection with fictional characters from their favorite books or with musicians they saw perform. In the 1940s, Frank Sinatra made women feel deep connections without knowing him personally. They didn’t know him personally, yet his persona was more than enough for thousands of women across the US to feel that deep connection to him. 

Unlike romantic relationships, parasocial bonds are one-sided—only one person invests emotional energy. This is why such a type of relationship needs to be clearly distinguished from all other relationship types we build during our lifetime. This article explores how parasocial relationships evolve in the digital age and what to remember.

 

Parasocial Relationships Then & Now

It’s true that parasocial relationships were never discussed as much as they are now. However, this term was first coined in the 1950s by Horton and Wohl after the appearance of television. They saw TV audiences forming intimacy with people they had never met.

Parasocial relationships have remained largely unchanged. Parasocial ties are one-sided emotional bonds where the other person remains unaware. This lack of reciprocity happens because people who are the target of this one-sided connection are people who are well known to larger audiences. Today, this can be anyone with public exposure, such as influencers, actors, musicians, artists, podcast hosts, comedians, etc. 

The most common type of parasocial relationships is fans with their celebrity. Fans follow celebrities online, consume their content, read updates, and discuss them.

 

Why Do Parasocial Relationships Form?

If you’ve never been engaged in a parasocial relationship, you might wonder what leads to someone developing such a specific connection to another human being. As social creatures, we all feel the need to belong and connect with others. Some people don’t find building relationships easy in their lives, so they turn to celebrities to form a certain type of connection with them. When you feel connected to someone you don’t know personally, you can imagine them however you want. You can even forget that they’re normal human beings with flaws. This can be especially appealing to those who’re afraid of getting hurt in romantic relationships. If that’s the case, a parasocial relationship here is a form of defense mechanism.

It can also happen that a person projects their own ideals onto the object of their desire. For instance, you might see someone doing something or fighting a cause dear to your heart, and this admiration for their courage can make you start developing feelings for them. In today’s era, parasocial relationships are also more common because of the accessibility to public figures. Social media blurrs boundaries between public and private and familiar and unfamiliar. Just by following someone on Instagram and seeing their content, you could be under the impression you know them and therefore start feeling connected to them. 

 

Benefits of Parasocial Relationships

Although parasocial relationships are unique, they offer certain benefits to people experiencing this type of connection with a public figure. Admiring their values, art, or self-expression can give emotional comfort during hard times.

Your role models can also inspire or motivate you. What you admire in them helps you define your values and goals. Admiring an artist’s activism can inspire you to create positive change too. You might volunteer, research, or take action to feel you’re making a difference. After all, celebrities and influencers are not the only ones who have an impact on other people’s lives. 

Parasocial relationships can create community through fan groups or online forums. It’s always nice to connect with people who share the same interests. 

 

Potential Downsides of Parasocial Relationships 

Just like there are upsides to parasocial relationships, you will have to be aware of potential downsides as well. One of them is unrealistic expectations of relationships. A one-sided emotional engagement can provide limited results, often making one uncomfortable when faced with all the challenges of dating a person in real life. Your beloved celebrity cannot hurt your feelings by not showing up on the first date, cheating on you, or leaving you. Similarly, they cannot provide you with the level of intimacy and care a person in your life would. 

Some parasocial relationships can also result in emotional dependency or obsession. You might become so connected to this person that you don’t feel the need to engage with people in your world or do things you used to love. If you notice that all you care about is them, it would be best to immediately reduce the time spent on checking their social media accounts or reading the news. 

 

Conclusion

Parasocial relationships can be very beneficial and inspiring if you maintain a healthy balance. You might learn what you are passionate about, what qualities you look for in a romantic partner, and so many other things. We’re living in a digital age in which we are learning so much about celebrities, influencers, and artists apart from their work, so it’s not so unusual to develop a certain connection to them. What matters most is to find people who are able to meet your emotional and romantic needs in person if you want to be in a relationship. Who knows, maybe they, too, admire the same person as you do!

 

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