Probably since the dawn of time, individuals have wanted to know how to make a woman orgasm.
You could ask many people about sensual pleasuring and you will hear a variety of responses from “well foreplay and bang the hell out of her” to a detailed encounter (examples: some get as detailed as rubbing the external clit glans counterclockwise for three minutes, then stroke between the labia lips and, tug on her nipples before thrusting anything in her can get her intensely close to orgasm).
Each person has a different goal and each woman orgasm is best discovered by knowing the body of that person.
These techniques on how to make a woman orgasm though are better than what you will find in most mainstream porn though. Not to shame porn, as I write for Pornhub, I think this is a more in depth look at pleasure.
Here are some of the techniques we have found which commonly get missed:
“Rimming” or shallowing of the introitus (a fancy word meaning the opening of the vagina).
Think of the rimming or shallowing effect as the champagne in the lobby phase of the evening.
Rimming… or shallowing is where the penis, dildo, or finger hangs out near the opening of the vagina for an amount of time.
When the tip is just barely in the vagina, there is an intense amount of pleasure and building which can come from this.
While on top if you rock your hips and gently massage the tip and prevent the whole penis from entering you are not only gaining more pleasure, you are also slowly making your partner build as well.
Shallowing has also been known to enhance the orgasm once full penetration has been achieved.
- The Curl – Start above the opening and curl the toy, penis, or fingers downward so the tip drags against the bottom wall of the vagina on its way in and lightly curls up to touch the top wall of the introitus.
- Repeat over and over – no more than 5 times.
- The Slight Catch – Put the tip of the toy, penis, or finger against the opening and move up and down so that it “catches” the entrance (the introitus) and goes into the hole of the vagina a tiny bit each time as you pass by. There can be a lovely little thrust from your partner each time as the tip goes in and rubs against the walls on its way up and down.
- Butterfly Flutter – The head of the penis or the toy may be thicker than the base of the shaft.
- Not always true of penises and toys, yet sometimes true. This can create a fun pressure just as it begins to penetrate. Fluttering is a way to get that feeling over and over again with quick repeated presses. Similar to knocking on a front door. The object will move in and out without depth of penetration.
- Tipping- Not like what you do at a restaurant to the waitstaff, this is where you put a finger/toy/penis at the opening of the vagina and press it so only the tip goes inside.
While it may seem like this is all about teasing and anticipation of more penetration, it’s not! The research shows that just stating with gentle thrusts feels amazing for those receiving. It begins to create a sensation and a story in the mind that the body immediately begins to respond to.
When practicing these tips to build up to orgasm:
Remember Warm and Wet first – Like other kinds of penetration, rimming or shallowing often feels better after foreplay. Even a gentle or rough touch around the thighs, breasts, and butt can feel amazing as a woman is beginning to get wet. Shallowing is a lot less pleasurable if there isn’t lube… so keep some handy by the side of your bed.
Slow and gentle – unlike Clitoral stimulation and deeper penetration, where speed is sometimes appreciated, some women prefer slower and gentler motions when just inside the vaginal opening.
Deliciously Subtle – The sensations from rimming or shallowing can be far more subtler than touching the external clit or labia or even deeper penetration. Give it time and try really focusing on the feeling.
Slippery Slope – It is tempting to quickly move past shallowing to deeper penetration, especially for couples when the penis head is just inside.
Learning to savor the feeling just inside the opening can heighten the entire experience. It will make you appear like a sexpert, and it gives more time for better results.
It’s not just a warm-up – Many love this rimming and shallowing effect as a main course activity.
Yes – women can orgasm from it!
Others love going back to a shallow touch after deep penetration. It can refresh the sensation for deeper penetration. Some women find this is a nice building technique to gain a more fulfilling orgasm.
If this doesn’t feel amazing on its own, know that Shallowing goes great with other activities. A fingertip inside can be added during other forms of sex, like oral, clitoral stimulation, and even anal play.
Don’t use the same fingers near the anus and the vagina.
Staying in the vagina is another great method to enhance an orgasm. This method seems simple enough, don’t break contact and keep it in, yet it goes deeper than that. No pun intended.
Staying in is more than not breaking contact, yet changing the experience in itself.
Keeping the toy or penis in which changing positions is hard enough as it is, yet this is all about how you move while inside the vagina.
Rocking is where the area just above the penis stays in contact with the clit and the top of the shaft, toy, and finger stays in contact with the upper ridge of the vagina.
The part that serves as a pivot point and instead of the focus being on moving in and out, it’s on rocking the area above the shaft, toy, or finger across the clit. Rolling is similar to Rocking, except the hips roll in a circular motion or left and right.
Take a tip from lesbian orgasm techniques because this is a great way to change things up from the old in and out motion and thus learn how to make a woman orgasm.
If you have any questions, or for clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized sessions on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.
Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists!
Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems.
LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.
Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.