Edging a Female Orgasm & How To Become An Expert In It

Edging a Female Orgasm & How To Become An Expert In It

 

Edging a female orgasm refers to the practice of preventing yourself from reaching orgasm right when you’re about to experience the sexual climax. It is also known as surfing, peaking, and teasing. This term has become very popular lately as a way to describe reaching better orgasms, yet it was first mentioned over half a century ago as a treatment for premature ejaculation.

To edge an orgasm means to prevent sexual stimulation before having an orgasm, wait about 20-30 minutes, and stimulate yourself repeatedly until you’ve decided to orgasm. You can think of edging orgasms as turning your short morning jogs into marathons. 

Holistically, edging an orgasm can help you become more aware of your sexual responses when you’re masturbating or having sex with your partner by introducing mindfulness into your sex game.

 

Before You Start Edging

The more you are aware of the ways your body responds in bed, the less anxiety you will have in your sexual life. You will be more certain of things you want and don’t want to try out alone or with your partner, and you will be absolutely sure when you are about to come. This knowledge will help you understand yourself better as a sexual being and also bring more curiosity into your sex life. 

However, to truly master edging, you need to first learn the four stages of arousal, which can help you understand when to prevent yourself from orgasming and beginning stimulation:

  1. Excitement. You will notice your skin is starting to flush, muscles get tense, heartbeat is getting faster, and blood going down to your penis or vagina and clitoris. For people with a penis, their scrotum will withdraw. For people with a vagina, their vagina will get wet.
  2. Plateau. All the symptoms you experienced in the first stage will get even more intense. You will feel like being closer to an orgasm, and to edge it, you will need to slow down stimulation.
  3. Orgasm. A range of nerve and muscle responses will start happening, and you will notice a feeling of ecstasy, more lubrication in your vagina, or ejaculation of semen from your penis. However, if you’re practicing edging, this is the stage you will continuously postpone until you’re ready to have an orgasm.
  4. Resolution. Once you have had an orgasm, your tissues go back to their non-aroused sizes and colors, while your vitals normalize as well. In this stage, the refractory period starts, where you will not be able to get aroused for a period of time. It might last anywhere from a few minutes to a few days. 

 

That said, two people might feel emotions during each of these four stages. You might even not experience some of them, while others might appear in different stages. This is why it is important to pay attention to what responses occur in your body and when to be able to learn how to edge an orgasm successfully. 

 

Ways to Edge An Orgasm

If you’re curious about edging, start paying attention to what you feel before your orgasm and try to remain in that stage between plateau and orgasm. Listen to your body and focus on the signs. You will probably not be able to do it right away, and that is completely fine. Most people are not paying attention to how they come or what their orgasms include, so the learning process takes some time. 

There are several ways you can start experimenting with edging. If a certain method doesn’t work for you, just continue to the next one until you find the one that can help you easily edge into an orgasm and achieve more sexual pleasure. 

 

Solo

  • Turn your environment into something that is ideal for you. Lock the doors, put on your favorite music, turn down the lights, or do anything else that will put you in the mood.
  • Prepare your body for the adventure. Close your eyes and start touching yourself in areas that feel good until your vagina gets wet or your penis gets hard. 
  • Begin with masturbation. Stroke the penis, stimulate the clitoris, or do anything else that has previously helped you achieve orgasms.
  • Once you notice you’re close to having an orgasm, stop touching yourself and start breathing slowly and deeply. Open your eyes to become aware of your environment.
  • Think about what got you so excited and become more aware of stimulation,areas, or thoughts that bring you closer to an orgasm. Focus on how your body was changing as well – sweating, excitation, shaking, etc.
  • When you’re ready, start touching yourself or masturbating a bit faster. Repeat all the steps that proved successful before until you are ready to reach your orgasm. 
  • When you feel you’re close, let yourself experience this incredible orgasm, which will probably be much longer or more intense than any other orgasms you have experienced in your life. Compare how your orgasm went with and without edging. 

 

With Your Partner

  • Get aroused through foreplay or any other activities that you and your partner prefer doing before sex. It can be dirty talking, oral sex, licking or sucking nipples, stimulating the G-spot, etc.
  • Tell your partner and listen to them when giving cues or sharing ideas on what to do with each other. 
  • Once you’re both close to an orgasm, reduce or stop the stimulation until you go back to a plateau. 
  • Begin the stimulation again and repeat all the things you both liked until you are ready to orgasm.
  • After an orgasm, talk with your partner about how it felt to edge into an orgasm. Learning how your partner felt can help you improve this entire experience next time. 

 

In Final Words

With each of these methods, you can adjust them to your needs while trying them alone or with your sex partner. The important thing here is to maintain your curiosity and focus on how your body reacts. Edging a female orgasm will feel even better if your partner is learning how to edge their orgasm as well. This will unlock a range of incredible opportunities that will show you new things about your sexuality, so don’t just ignore it. 

 

BLISS: Proven Methods for Improving the Female Orgasm

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do