How to Convince Your Partner to Go to Therapy With You

 

If you’re in a relationship or a marriage, you have already experienced the good and the bad and might have considered ways of convincing your spouse/partner to go to therapy with you. No relationship is perfect, and it requires a lot of communication to understand each other’s needs and wants, so talking to someone who might guide you both to become the couple you want to be could be the solution you need.

If your partner or spouse doesn’t feel as strongly about the benefits of therapy as you do, give them some time. In the meantime, do your best to share everything they will get from sessions and work with you on strengthening your union.

 

The Power of Couples Therapy

Marital therapy, couples counseling, and couples therapy are other names for couples therapy. It’s a form of family therapy that can help examine why two individuals disagree. This kind of relationship therapy also emphasizes communication skill improvement for a romantic relationship to recover and flourish. Marital counseling or couples therapy may have numerous advantages when two people are committed to it. It may play a crucial role in establishing a partnership based on trust, respect, and concern for one another.

The advantages of relationship therapy can vary depending on the pair seeking assistance. The greater the level of commitment both you and your partner are prepared to make to your relationship, the more likely it is to succeed.

Having someone you both trust is essential when looking for a competent couples therapist. After hearing what you both say, your therapist may provide frank, fair, and impartial comments. Hearing what someone else says about our relationship gives us a fresh perspective. That impartial third person can hear all sides and provide you with insightful comments and suggestions on different areas of your relationship or marriage. 

How to Convince Your Partner/Spouse to Go to Therapy with You

If you’re certain that you want to try therapy, yet your partner doesn’t agree, be patient. There are certain things you can do to help your partner understand how therapy can make your relationship and your individual lives better. 

 

• Ask Them Why

Before judging or encouraging your partner to try couples therapy with you, ask them for their reasons. Why don’t they like therapy? Are they afraid of something? What do they think might happen? Understanding why your partner doesn’t consider couples therapy a good idea might help you understand each other better. Once you know their reasons, it will be much easier to know your options.

 

• Share Your Reasons

Oftentimes, your partner might assume that by going to therapy, you’re expressing your unhappiness about the relationship. Explain to them the real reasons why you think therapy would benefit your relationship. For instance, you might want to feel closer to them, work on setting boundaries that would work for both of you, or look to solve a recurring argument in a relationship.

 

• Connect with a Couple That Goes to Therapy

Do you have a friend who went to or is going to couples therapy with their partner? If they are willing to share that experience, this might show your partner that it’s not at all as they imagined it. Also, if they hear from someone else about the numerous benefits of couples therapy, it might be more effective. 

 

• Talk about Boundaries

When trying a new thing, especially as a couple, it’s important to establish boundaries. Your partner might feel insecure about certain topics or areas of their life, so respecting their needs is essential before going into therapy. Allow them to gain trust in your therapist first. They might need more time than you to open up about certain things, yet once they feel secure enough, they will feel more open to the idea of sharing more vulnerable experiences or thoughts.

 

• Test the Idea

Explain to your partner or spouse that you can try different therapists before you commit to the one you both like. Not only that, you can get them to be more interested in couples therapy if you tell them that this doesn’t have to be a commitment at all. Suggest trying one session and seeing how they feel about it. With a good therapist, they will probably want to give it another shot before you start going to therapy regularly. 

 

• Find the Common Objective

Besides sharing your reasons why you want to try couples or marriage therapy, also try to focus on the common goal. For instance, if you’re engaged, you can tell your partner that you want to be even more intimate with them as you’re approaching marriage. Or, you might want to start working on some issues before you go on a longer vacation together. Framing the idea of therapy as a tool to enjoy something that matters to you both might improve the chances of your partner actually going to therapy with you. 

 

• Know When to Quit

If your partner is certain that they don’t want to go to therapy even after trying all these suggestions from our list, respect it. Maybe it’s not the right time for them to do therapy. However, this doesn’t mean that you can’t open up this subject with them in a few months. Be mindful of how your partner feels, and instead of forcing a solution, try to be more supportive. 

 

Conclusion

There is no doubt that any relationship can benefit from therapy, even the one that ended. However, we are not all aware of the benefits that couples or marriage therapy can bring to our relationship. If your partner or spouse doesn’t want to go to therapy, talk to them about it. Ask them about their reasons and think about ways you can make them feel more comfortable with that suggestion. Also, if you’re not in therapy and are only considering couples therapy, think about finding a therapist for yourself and working on improving your mental and emotional health. In the end, there are so many things we can give to ourselves without expecting to receive them from someone else!

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.