This is a custom category page for Lifestyle.

What Is the Meaning of Divorce

/in , , /by

What Is the Meaning of Divorce + What to Expect

 

Married or not, you’ve probably wondered one or more times about the meaning of divorce. How do you know when you should consider ending your marriage? What should you do if you’ve decided to divorce your spouse? If you ever find yourself in this situation, these and many other questions might be on your mind.

However, before you even step into the commitment of marriage, it would be worth learning more about divorce. Understanding why some couples divorce can highlight areas to focus on for a lasting marriage.

 

Common Reasons for Divorce

Of course, each marriage is unique, and it can end for a unique reason. However, there are certain reasons that marital counselors and divorce lawyers always refer to when talking about most of their clients. Most people think infidelity is the main cause of divorce, but other things can hurt your marriage and end it. 

 

Lack of Communication

All issues begin in marriage when a lack of communication occurs. Regardless of the reason for that lack of communication, you seem to focus on one thing and your spouse on another. You will potentially start making up a story on how they feel and what they need. Successful married couples often agree that communication and effort are key to lasting relationships.

 

Financial Issues

Financial issues are linked to stress and a range of negative emotions, such as fear, anxiety, guilt, frustration, and jealousy. Having financial issues in marriage can lead to blame instead of teamwork in finding solutions. As fear overcomes them, they may see each other as enemies and seek divorce. 

 

Infidelity 

Cheating is one of the most profound wounds of marriage, and it’s not just because there is another person involved in your intimate relationship. If you’ve been cheated on, you will probably have a difficult time trusting your partner, even with little things. Furthermore, it might lead to self-esteem issues and questioning whether or not you are attractive or intriguing enough for your spouse. The best way to get rid of all these doubts is by communicating them with your partner and learning the real reason why they cheated. In a complex situation like this one, it’s also important to discuss your mutual needs for security, love, and understanding. 

 

Growing Apart

When you marry, you hope that you and your partner will eternally be in love and grow old together. However, sometimes couples grow apart, and there is nothing you can do to force yourself to fall in love with your partner again. You may have had different experiences or learned different things from the same ones, making you incompatible. For instance, your partner might have stayed exactly the same person they were ten years ago, while you have changed and need different things or a deeper level of intimacy they cannot provide you with. 

 

Before the Divorce 

Deciding to divorce your spouse should not be a quick decision. If this is the first argument you had as a married couple, don’t even think about divorce unless the damage is unrepairable. Marriage consists of both good and bad moments. The key to a happy marriage is staying authentic and transparent through the tough times. 

Another piece of advice would be to talk to an expert on marital issues before you decide to divorce. Talking to a MFT (marriage and family therapist) can help you both listen to each other better and understand what is causing issues between you. As you share information about your marriage with a therapist, they will be able to provide you with a set of tools to strengthen the areas lacking. 

Even if you’re both certain that you want to end your marriage, having such guidance can help you make this process less painful and stressful. Given that divorce is one of the most stressful situations, any assistance will be greatly appreciated by both parties. 

 

Things to Avoid When Getting a Divorce

<p>Remember, a divorce is not something you can complete in a single day. It’s a process that often lasts longer than expected, and maybe you and your partner will need some time apart before you proceed with all of it. Whatever your situation might be, there are a few things that can make this process unnecessarily complicated or stressful.

Instead of telling everyone you’re divorcing and who your ex-spouse is, keep quiet. Remind yourself that this is an intimate moment. If you need to talk to someone, make sure it’s people you’re closest to and who have your best interest at heart. </span>

Secondly, instead of focusing on everything that’s wrong with your partner, focus on your needs. The split will not be an easy period for you, so ensuring you’re taking care of yourself is essential. You might need more time alone or want to journal your thoughts and emotions. Whatever it is, make sure you provide yourself with anything that will give you strength in these difficult moments. Focusing on yourself instead of your spouse can help you make the right decision at any moment and avoid getting hurt. If you need additional support, consider reaching out to a therapist to have space and time to focus on your well-being. They will also help you adjust to life without your spouse and all the changes after the divorce. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibility multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

How to Let Go Of Someone

/in , , /by

How to Let Go Of Someone + Say Bye to Affair Partner

 

For whatever reason, you might have found yourself in a love triangle and are now thinking about how to let go of someone and work on your marriage. Even when society talks about marriage affairs, we do it in a very judging way, suggesting the person end the affair, admit to their spouse, and divorce them afterward.

Not all marriages are the same, and not all marriage affairs are the same. As big as our need to put a label on things is, the truth is that every situation is different. Your reasons for falling for someone outside your marriage may differ from your friend’s or spouse’s perspective, which may also contrast with the majority’s view.

That is why we’ve decided to provide support if you’re currently considering letting go of the person you were seeing. Despite your future plans, you’ll want to end this relationship well and move on. 

 

Reasons to End an Affair

There are many reasons why you might end an affair, from guilt to not finding this person intriguing anymore. If you’ve seen the movie Babygirl with Nicole Kidman and Antonio Banderas, which is in movie theaters right now, you might have noticed a different perspective on this matter.

In the movie, she does not start the affair because she is bored with her marriage. She is not seen by him, and she doesn’t feel encouraged to show him her other side, which is kept hidden throughout all the years of their marriage. This leads to activating this part of her with a younger stranger, who starts working in her company as an intern. He teases her, plays with her, and then seduces her. 

Other reasons may include differing relationship goals, especially if the other person

is unmarried. During this experience, you might also find out that you want to work more on your marriage. Your marriage is important, and the affair made you want to work harder to improve it.

 

I Cheated… Now What? 

If you’ve ended your affair and are not certain about the next steps to take, let’s look at your options together. First, there is this giant question of whether or not to admit the affair to your spouse. The answer will depend entirely on you; however, keep in mind that the guilt can creep into your life, affect your marriage, your health, and so much more. It is not an effortless thing to carry around, especially if you are devoted to the idea of saving your marriage.

If you decide to tell your spouse, you will want to do it with your heart open, using kind words and truly asking for forgiveness. Tell them the reason you decided to start an affair and share everything this decision has taught you. For instance, you might say that you realized how it’s been a really long time since the two of you tried something new in bed or spent time alone without kids.

Most importantly, respect your spouse’s needs. They might need time to think about it, or they might get outraged at you. Whatever it is, be patient. It’s not an easy thing to hear, and they might need some time to process all of it. If you want to save your marriage, you will have to be mindful of how your spouse feels and what they need. You might feel the need to overexplain yourself or ask for forgiveness several times, yet try not to do that. Respecting them means that you can give them exactly what they need during this process.

 

A Path to Healing

Oftentimes, a person having an affair will be so focused on analyzing their spouse’s behaviors, emotions, and words that they’ll forget about themselves. You have every right to take care of yourself during this process. Such care can mean different things, from starting individual therapy to journaling.

Even if the affair means nothing to you anymore, it’s still worth revisiting these momen

ts and asking yourself certain questions. What made you say yes to this adventure? What did you learn from it? Is there something you need to forgive yourself? Your healing path doesn’t have to depend on whether or not your spouse wants the same thing as you.

Once you’re both on the same page, consider seeking marital counseling. There are many things here that need to be addressed for you both to properly heal from this experience. Otherwise, emotions like guilt, shame, anger, anxiety, and doubts can appear in different situations and cause arguments between the two of you.

Establishing trust after the affair is more important than anything else. If you’re unable to trust each other with time, it can make the marriage impossible. These are the things an expert in marriage therapy can help you with.

Many couples have recovered from affairs and have become even more connected after it. A therapist will provide you with space to discuss your fears and doubts instead of ignoring them or treating them superficially. They will help you listen to each other and truly see the other person’s perspective. Soon, you’ll both feel better and learn from this experience instead of being afraid of it. If you love someone, you will want to move on and be excited about your future together.

If this all feels confusing, maybe it’s time to schedule a session. 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibility multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

What Does Demisexual Mean?

/in , , /by

What Does Demisexual Mean & Am I Demisexual?

 

If you Googled ‘What does demisexual mean’ and ended up here, you’re in the right place. In this article, we will explain the meaning of demisexuality, talk about its characteristics, and discuss everything else that is demisexual-related. 

A demisexual person experiences sexual attraction only after developing an emotional bond with another person. You probably came to this page because you are keen to learn more about demisexuality, believe you may be demisexual, or know someone who is. Whichever the reason, you will find all your answers below. 

 

Demisexuality Explained

Demisexuality, to put it simply, is a sexual orientation in which emotional connection takes precedence over sexual desire. Not every emotional bond leads to sexual attraction. For demisexuals, emotions are the foundation of sexual connection. This phenomenon leads to them experiencing sexual attraction towards someone much rarer than other non-demisexual people. 

Because they need to be emotionally involved first, many might consider them asexual. In some cases, demisexuals might even call them asexual because of the rarity of such occasions. Still, it’s critical to understand demisexuality, especially when you want to connect with someone and explain to them your perspective on relationships and connections. 

Another point to distinguish demisexuals from non-demisexual people is their attitude toward sex while dating. Non-demisexual people will follow a set of rules or recommendations when it comes to sex. It might be waiting for the third date or learning more about the person before having sex. 

On the other hand, demisexual people don’t wait for society or themselves to impose certain requirements. In their case, there is a lack of sexual desire until they feel emotionally connected to the person they are dating. If they don’t feel emotionally compatible, they won’t want sex, regardless of appearance. 

 

Are You Demisexual?

Now, you might have an idea why you or many other people feel confused when it comes to defining demisexuality. So, if you’re still not certain whether you or someone close to you is demisexual, answering these questions might help:

  • Do you lack an interest in having one-night stands or casual flings with other people? 
  • Have you ever felt attracted to someone after having a deep conversation with them, something you didn’t feel before that conversation? 
  • Did most of the individuals you found sexually attractive or engaged in sexual activity have close friendships with you? 
  • Do people around you sometimes say you’re playing hard to get while you’re actually just not interested?

If you responded positively to these questions, it means that you’re probably demisexual. If you’re not a fan of labels, that’s completely fine, too. Labels typically help identify ourselves and introduce that part of us to other people. Understanding yourself better can help you find the people you can have that connection to more easily. 

 

How Demisexual People Connect with Others

If you’re a demisexual or you’re dating someone who is, it makes sense to learn the pathway to establishing a significant relationship with them. Although there are many similarities with dating non-demisexual people, there are a few things to keep in mind.

Firstly, don’t feel pressured into having sex if you don’t feel ready. People who don’t understand demisexuality might have certain expectations of you. It is up to you to remind yourself that you must first establish the emotional connection and that this process is perfectly normal for many people. 

Secondly, invest in people you have shared interests with, as it will help you connect with them on a deeper level. Having the same hobby, working in the same industry, or growing up in the same city can all contribute to the development of an emotional bond with that person. Otherwise, you might feel a lack of encouragement to go on dates if your experiences have been boring. 

Thirdly, it might be a beneficial idea to connect with other demisexual people. If you live in a bigger city, maybe there’s even an online community with people who feel the same way you do about dating and romantic relationships. Going out with them can make you feel understood without having to explain yourself too much. Furthermore, it can be a connective topic to bond over. 

Lastly, remind yourself of all the perks of being demisexual. If you’re unable to find like-minded people, it can become discouraging to date. However, demisexuality can have several benefits, and remembering that can give you motivation to meet new people. For instance, your relationship could last longer because you’ve established strong foundations for it before taking it to the next level. Also, you won’t waste time waiting to see if the sex is good. Because emotional connection is more important to you in the beginning, you will be aware of everything this person has to offer you and can determine whether they are the right fit for you. 

 

Final Words

Demisexual or not, your sexuality is who you are, and you should celebrate yourself. Surround yourself with people who support you, and you will find it easier to go on dates that are precisely the type of experience you’re looking for. 

It’s also a wonderful idea to learn more about demisexuality, as there might be a lot of what you don’t know. However, if you decide to go about it, remind yourself frequently that how we feel about our sexuality and how our sexual desire arises is unique to each of us. Comparing yourself to others or forcing yourself to do something unnatural won’t help. 

Once you have a clearer idea of what matters to you, it will become easier to pursue it. In no time, you will feel more interested in dating and meeting new people, sharing interests with them, and allowing yourself to enjoy every step of each experience. After all, meeting new people is exciting, and you should make the most of it!

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients’ lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Acts of Service Examples

/in , , , /by

Acts of Service Examples You Can Start Doing Today

 

If your partner’s love language is the act of service or you simply are keen to learn more about it, you’ll want to go through the acts of service examples. Acts of service as a love language refer to doing certain activities that matter to the other person. An example can be running errands, buying them their favorite chocolate while they’re grocery shopping, or doing household chores. 

If you want to become more fluent in this love language, we’ve gathered everything you need to know about it. Get inspired by our acts of service examples and see which of them can be applied to your romantic relationships and friendships. 

 

What is an Act of Service?

Love language refers to the way we prefer to love and be loved. Besides an act of service, there is also gift-giving, physical touch, quality time, and words of affirmation. If you or your partner prefers the act of service as their dominant love language, you will want to familiarize yourself as much as possible with it. 

An act of service means you express your love or appreciation for another person through helpful actions instead of the other four love languages. Since this is your preferred language, you will appreciate it more if someone helps you thoughtfully rather than saying they love you or giving a hug. 

This is not to say you can only have one way you receive love. We can express love in different ways. However, one way will typically be dominant. In relationships with others, it’s important to be aware of our and their love language, as this allows us to grow and evolve together. 

 

Acts of Service List

Examples of acts of service can be quite different from person to person. For instance, you might enjoy it when your partner surprises you with a home-cooked meal after a long day at the office. Your friend, on the other hand, might prefer that their partner does all the chores if they have more spare time. 

These are some common examples of acts of service that can inspire you: 

  • Cook a meal for another person
  • Run errands for them 
  • Handle a task or chore you know they dislike
  • Surprise them with a clean home
  • Offer them a nice massage after a long day
  • Fix something you know they would use if it weren’t broken
  • Offer to drive them to work or somewhere else
  • Take care of them when they’re sick or tired
  • Offer to walk their dog for them 
  • Surprise them with a cup of coffee in the morning
  • Clean their car
  • Iron their clothes
  • Organize their closet
  • Prepare a nice bath for them
  • Pack them lunch on a busy day
  • Ask them how you can support them when they’re under stress

 

How to Give Acts of Service

If your partner’s love language is service, you understand that actions have a greater impact than words.  Below, you will find additional tips for performing acts of service. 

 

1.Express Gratitude for Support

Express gratitude to your spouse when they use your preferred language, and let them know you value it when they return the favor.  You will both feel appreciated in the relationship if you establish a pattern of showing each other love and gratitude. If acts of service are their preferred love language, enjoy the moments of their gratitude as well. Such moments can bring you closer. 

 

2.Ask About Their Preferred Acts of Service

Be specific.  Would they rather you just run that bath for them, or should you ask first?  Do they enjoy having you do the laundry yet, would rather handle the bill payment themselves?  Make sure your acts of service really serve your partner or friend. Occasionally, what we think would be best for others is not what they want at that moment.

 

3.Communication

Communication about what works for both of you is crucial in love languages.  It is important that you and your partner agree on the ways that you both like to show love.  Developing your communication skills in a partnership will come with numerous rewards.

 

4.Share What You Need

Both of you should practice asking for what you want. With time, the other person will learn which acts of service work best for you. For example, some people do not like it when you look through their drawers, while others want you to do their laundry and put it away for them. Remember that the goal is to show love and appreciation in the way your partner receives it, not to force yourself onto others.  

 

5.Don’t Compare

If your best friend and your boyfriend have a preference for acts of service, it doesn’t necessarily mean they will value the same actions. Every person is unique. Having an understanding of how to serve with love will be beneficial when meeting a new person with the same love language. However, listening carefully to them will show you what they really need from you. 

 

In Final Words

Acts of service are a wonderful way to show appreciation for other people in our lives, even if it’s not their dominant love language. If you notice your friend or family member stressed and without any spare time, offer your help. Maybe you can take their kids to school or take their clothes to the dry cleaner. Small acts like that can mean so much to someone who doesn’t have time or needs additional support in their life. 

By being supportive in that way, you not only show how much you care about this person. You help others who are in their inner circle. Being kind to each other benefits everyone around us. If you help your partner, their colleagues at work will notice they are much more relaxed. Your sister will have more time to spend with her spouse if you assist her with the children. 

If that’s the way you show love for others, you will want them to do the same for you. What’s a better way to receive it than give it to others first? 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients’ lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

 

How Do I Talk To People?

/in , , /by

How Do I Talk To People at Social Gatherings?

 

Struggling to navigate social situations and wondering, “How do I talk to people?” You’re not alone!

Figuring out how to talk to people you don’t know is a huge part of socializing. Small talk can feel like a challenge, but with the right approach, it becomes much easier.

Whether you’re experiencing anxiety, feeling drained, or just not loving “peopling,” socializing can be tough. But knowing how to talk to people in a way that feels natural is a skill that can be developed.

In this video, I’ll share practical strategies for making social events more enjoyable. From knowing how to talk to someone you’ve just met to keeping conversations flowing with those you already know, you’ll learn tips to feel more comfortable and confident.

We’ll explore how body language, active listening, and conversation starters can improve how you talk to people. Plus, I’ll give advice for handling awkward silences and managing social boundaries.

If socializing feels exhausting, I’ll also discuss ways to recharge and engage with others on your own terms, without feeling drained.

You deserve to connect with others in a way that feels authentic and true to you.

Let’s dive into how you can talk to someone with confidence, clarity, and ease.

 

 

Couples Communication Strategies

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibility multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Reflective Listening

/in , , /by

Your Guide to Reflective Listening

 

Reflective Listening goes beyond active and passive listening by incorporating repeating and paraphrasing. You’ve likely heard of active and passive listening, but have you considered this deeper approach? If these concepts are new to you, read our guide for a clearer understanding.

In this article, you will learn the benefits of reflective listening and why it is a crucial skill for any relationship.

 

Degrees of Active Listening

It helps when you actively pay attention and listen to people around you, whether it’s in your professional or personal life.

Successful communication requires as much learning how to listen as well as how to speak. 

Hearing someone speak and truly listening to them are two entirely unique things. If we’re actively listening, it means that this person has our full attention and we’re doing our best to understand what they are communicating to us. 

 

1.Repeating

Repeating is the first degree of active listening, and it refers to repeating the words you’ve heard in the conversation to make sure you understand the person correctly. It requires paying attention, remembering the words, and then saying them back to the speaker. As opposed to passive listening, repeating lets the other person know that you are paying attention and want to understand what they are saying.

 

2.Paraphrasing

By repeating, you are practically saying the exact same words to confirm the speaker’s intentions. Instead of mirroring the exact words, with paraphrasing, you choose similar words yet not the same. This approach shows the other person that you’ve resonated with the shared information. It also allows you to remember that information more easily because you use words and phrases that you connect with better.

 

3.Reflecting

At first, paraphrasing and reflecting might seem very similar. However, reflecting involves taking a moment to think about the information shared in the conversation and reflecting on it in your words. You can summarize the conversation or provide a few examples to confirm your understanding. Reflecting can be the most profound level of listening, where the listener resonates with all the conversation’s content.

 

What Is Reflective Listening?

Reflective listening is beneficial across all areas. It can help you communicate more efficiently with your new coworkers, meet your superior’s demands easily, and strengthen your romantic relationship or friendship.

Reflective listening requires a conversation. The person who is listening will speak soon to reflect on what has been said, which is very different from passive listening. For example, if your boss is explaining the details of a new project, you will want to reflect on it, ask questions, and confirm if all is clear. 

It’s also worth mentioning that reflective listening occurs in one-on-one conversations or in small groups, as it might be challenging during a business conference with 50 people. That is what makes reflective listening a valuable communication tool that helps build relationships. This intimate aspect guarantees mutual understanding and the ability to collaborate towards a shared objective, whatever it may be. 

 

Key Components of Reflective Listening

If you’re looking to become a master in reflective listening, you will have to first learn its key components. These components will help you truly listen to other people and learn from them. 

Reflective listening consists of four key components: 

  • Active listening—listening to the speaker with your full attention without any distractions 
  • Paraphrasing—repeating what the speaker said back to them, yet in your own words
  • Clarification—asking questions to ensure understanding or raising any confusion you have
  • Empathizing—acknowledging the speaker’s thoughts and emotions and taking them into account during the conversation 

 

Benefits of Reflective Listening

Obviously, there are many benefits of reflective listening, especially when compared to passive listening. When we’re dedicated to truly listening to the person talking to us, we’re able to understand their perspective and strengthen the connection with them based on the information received, both verbally and non-verbally. 

Reflective listening also strengthens trust. Knowing you are being listened to carefully encourages you to share more and actively seek opportunities to continue communicating with this person. Conversely, people who listen and think about what was said are usually the ones that others turn to for comfort, a shoulder to cry on, advice, or just to vent. 

Also, reflective listening reduces misunderstandings and conflicts. Hearing someone speak and assuming you know what they think and feel often leads to confusion and conflicts. If you’re invested, it becomes easier to have empathy for the other person. In other words, understanding their intentions, thought processes, emotions, and so much more becomes easier if you listen closely. 

That is what makes reflective listening valuable in problem-solving situations as well. Whenever a conflict arises, whether it’s at work, home, or somewhere else, using this tool can enable both sides to find common ground because they’ll have a clearer idea of why the conflict occurred in the first place. 

 

How to Practice Reflective Listening

With that in mind, you may be wondering how to start reflective listening today and reap its benefits. Once you’ve determined that you want to become better at listening to people around you, there are certain things to keep in mind to ensure you’re doing a good job. 

Firstly, whenever you need to listen to someone, make sure you’ve eliminated all the distractions. Find a comfortable place to have a conversation, turn off your phone, close the doors, and decide to focus only on the person in front of you. 

During the conversation, be mindful of nonverbal cues. Pay attention to the speaker’s hands, sitting position, eye movement, and any other detail that can fill in the picture of how they feel or what they think about the matter discussed. Also, use your nonverbal cues to show support. Look them in their eyes while they are talking and nod anytime something resonates with you.

When the other person finishes speaking, don’t just say “I understand” and end the conversation by making it about yourself instantly. Utilize this moment to contemplate the spoken words, verify their accuracy, and stimulate conversation by posing questions. This shows that you are doing your best to improve the relationship you have with that person. 

If this all feels confusing, book a session and we can help you understand it more. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients’ lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

How to Stop Porn Addiction

/in , /by

How to Stop Porn Addiction & Become Free

 

If you have been wondering how to stop porn addiction, you have come to the right place. Addiction of any kind is a serious issue, and sometimes overcoming addictive behaviors requires more than just willpower. If this is the case for you, you can experiment with different techniques and approaches to see if one of them helps you stop watching it. 

Before we dive into these techniques, let’s go a few steps back and look closely at porn addiction, why and when it occurs, and other relevant information that could help you understand why you can quit this easily. 

 

Understanding Porn Addiction

Porn addiction is frequently misinterpreted in the context of behavioral addictions. This keeps this addiction stigmatized, making it hard to identify. When talking about porn, there is still a lot of disagreement among medical experts on the boundaries between addiction and compulsion. However, there is no doubt that you can get addicted to porn. Not giving this topic the respect and seriousness it deserves makes it only harder for those struggling with this addiction. Not knowing what to do, who to ask for help, and which steps to follow is the first problem porn addicts face when they try to stop their addiction. 

What’s important to say is whether you have a porn addiction or compulsion; seeking help in the form of therapy is essential to stop watching porn. Porn addiction, or the inability to control the urge to view porn, is one of the most common addictions, and you have every right to take the path of quitting it when you’re ready.

 

Signs of Porn Addiction

Watching porn can have numerous negative consequences on your life. Excessive porn time can impact your sleep quality and time, make you ignore or forget about your responsibilities. And even impact how you connect romantically with other people. After all, porn can affect the expectations you might have from your romantic partner in bed and out of it. 

To help you understand whether you or someone close to you has a porn addiction, we’ve gathered porn addiction signs to be aware of. One of the most obvious ones is compulsive watching, when watching pornography becomes something you have almost no control over. 

Also, if you’re noticing you’re spending more time watching porn than before, it could be a sign of addiction. Another thing to pay attention to is whether porn is preventing you from performing your daily tasks, whether it’s at work/school or at home. As mentioned above, relationship problems are also one of the common signs of porn addiction. 

Although this sign is not very obvious at first, the need to watch more extreme or varied content is typical with porn addicts. The content you used to watch before might not do the work for you anymore. So you need something that will excite you on another level. 

Occasionally, individuals struggling with a porn addiction may choose to avoid social events or comply with the minimum expectations of others in order to quickly return to porn. 

Taking all that into consideration, it’s pretty obvious that porn addiction is a serious problem. If you’ve tried to stop it on your own, you might have experienced withdrawal symptoms, such as irritability, restlessness, or anxiety. This is your nervous system reacting to the lack of something it got used to, making it really difficult to continue being motivated about stopping your porn addiction. 

 

Steps to Stopping Porn Addiction

Just because stopping porn addiction is hard for you, it doesn’t mean it’s impossible. If people can get rid of their drug or alcohol addiction, you can do the same. There are certain steps and ideas that are recommended for people with porn addiction. If you’ve tried quitting before or this is your first time, follow these ideas and implement them as naturally as you. Keep in mind that the addiction didn’t appear overnight, so it certainly won’t disappear quickly either. 

 

1.Admit You Have a Problem

We know—it’s not easy. Admitting you have a problem implies you have to find a solution. However, what if it’s enough for now just to admit that you have a problem and not try to search for a solution? After you’ve admitted to yourself or someone you trust that you have a problem. Take a moment to feel whatever feels right at that time. Jumping into problem-solving mode will probably lead to counterproductive results. 

 

2.Start with Small Goals

With addictions, it’s quite difficult to get rid of them completely at once. Instead, start with smaller goals of watching porn every other day and limiting your time. Depending on how much you used to spend watching pornography, the goal should be a representation of a tiny advancement. 

 

3.Identify Your Triggers

A lot of people have problems with addictions because they use them as a way to run from stress. For instance, you might notice that your trigger is coming home tired from work and wanting to disconnect from thinking about your endless to-do list. Maybe you’re too bored, so porn provides you with a fantasy world where everything is possible. Whatever the reason, understanding it can help you find alternative solutions.

 

4.Replace Porn Watching with Healthy Habits

You can’t just expect to quit watching porn and not replace this habit with something else. If you’ve spent hours every day watching porn and then suddenly stopped, this void might remind you of your addiction. Instead, remind yourself of hobbies and activities you used to enjoy doing. Spend more time with your friends, go to the gym, take long walks, and listen to your favorite podcast. Creating a list of ideas can also help you avoid feeling like you have too much free time now when you’re quitting porn-watching. 

 

The Power of the Therapy

The best thing to do when trying to quit any type of addiction is to reach out to a recommended therapist and share your problem with them. A mental health professional can provide you with useful information on how to stay on the recovery path and break free from the addiction. After all, it’s the only way to get your life into your own hands again!

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

 

Robot Fetish

/in , , /by

Robot Fetish: A Deep Dive into Technosexuality

 

Although you may not know about robot fetishes, you may have seen a film about human-machine romance. Since artificial intelligence has become a media buzzword, people have wondered if it can evoke desire like humans. 

To understand how and why humans decided to connect with the machines in a way that used to connect with other humans, we have to address robot fetish and technosexuality. These two are synonyms referring to sexual or romantic attraction to robots or other machines that aim to mimic human behavior. It ranges from admiration for the robotic form to longing for a non-human, artificially intelligent partner. 

In this article, we’ll explore the origins, psychology, cultural impact, and everything else you’d like to know about robot fetishism.

 

The Origins of Robot Fetishism

Although we talk about robots as something futuristic, the truth is that humanoid machines have been present throughout history. Just remember Pygmalion and Galatea in mythology or Frankenstein and Metropolis in literature. In recent years, we’ve had sci-fi movies like Blade Runner, Ex Machina, and Her, all showing the allurement of human-robot relationships. 

However, today, we’re not talking about imagination. Due to the evolution of robotics and artificial intelligence that started at the end of the 20th century, people nowadays have all the tools needed to build a relationship with a robot. The normalization of human-machine interactions is offering a new aspect for those who are looking for something different for numerous reasons. 

You may be tired of trying your hardest or being cheated on, so you are exploring robot fetish to see if it is right for you. Regardless of the motivation, there’s no denying the permanence of human-machine interactions. 

 

The Psychology Behind Technosexuality

Why do people find robots alluring? Well, there are several reasons why technosexuality is becoming so popular. One of the most obvious and common is control and predictability. The reason why many relationships and marriages go through difficult times and even separations is that we can’t control or predict another person’s behavior. Compared to humans, robots currently may have less emotionally complex characteristics, which allows them to become “perfect matches” to each individual.

Also, there is an aspect of fantasy and projection. Technosexuality allows humans to project their desires onto non-human entities. In other words, the robot you’re building a relationship with will want to become what you need it to be. Do you want to have a partner that is more seductive? A robot can do this for you. Do you maybe want a partner who knows how to make you laugh when you have a lousy day? A robot will do this for you. 

Lastly, we have to address the increasing loneliness in today’s modern society. We feel more and more separated from society. This can be because of traveling, moving abroad, or simply because we’re so used to being at home interacting with technology that we’ve lost interest in connecting the way we used to before. Robots can fill the emotional void for people who have a deep desire to connect with someone with the minimum risk of getting hurt. 

 

Technosexuality in Popular Culture

As mentioned above, technosexuality appeared in mythology, literature, and movies. Its usage can be defined as recent, yet the concept of robot fetish is older than any technology the human race has witnessed. Over the past few years, there has also been a rising trend of video games with robots as icons of desire. The most popular examples are Ava from Ex Machina and Westworld’s Hosts. 

Robot fetish is a common theme in modern erotic art and literature as well. This concept spreads across all forms of art and entertainment, and its popularity indicates that today’s audience finds this idea alluring. The rise of AI companion apps and interactive sex dolls further blurs the line between fantasy and reality. Similarly, they are working on surrogate sex robots to be able to carry your future children while you stay at work. 

If you’re interested in a human-like relationship with a robot, there are tons of options for you to try out. From installing a mobile app on your phone and building relationships with a machine to using AI tools for dating advice, matchmaking, and role play, AI can offer support for any romantic aspect you seek. 

 

The Future of Human-Robot Intimacy

Given this, what will the future be like? These technological advances show AI and robotics’ potential to create emotionally responsive companions. This could lead to long-term relationships with machines, where people make memories and celebrate important dates. 

Only twenty years ago, we didn’t have AI assistants such as Alexa or Siri. The idea of technology creating our grocery shopping list or playing interactive games with us was pretty unimaginable at that time. That is why we can say that technology and the way humans respond to it are difficult to predict. However, the main question isn’t whether or not society will accept the idea of human-robot intimacy. What matters is whether this type of intimacy will make a person feel loved and secure and ready to date again if the opportunity arises. 

 

Conclusion

There is no doubt that the technology we’re seeing today can be used in different ways and forms, including our romantic lives. Technosexuality brought to life a thousand-year-old concept in which we’ve been imagining what it’s like to connect with someone who is not human. 

With more robots in our society, there is no doubt that there will also be an increase in the number of relationships with them. We’ve mentioned all the reasons why someone would be interested in building a romantic relationship with a machine, yet a machine is still just a piece of technology. One internet outage or software attack would cause that relationship to suffer a unique set of challenges. 

Despite the existence of robots, the ideal relationship remains unattainable. It comes with certain risks, and it’s up to you to weigh your options and decide whether it’s the right thing for you. Come talk to us if you have issues with robot-machine relationships. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Stress Relief Activities

/in , , /by

Stress Relief Activities to Unwind and Recharge

 

If you’ve been overwhelmed with responsibilities lately, learning which stress relief activities can help you relax and get back on track. Whether it’s work, family, or your health, feeling stressed can only make things worse. However, most of the time, we’re not aware of the activities that can help us step away from all the tension. 

Whatever your life looks like, what we all have in common is the inability to control external factors. In other words, we can’t control what will happen. What we can control is how we react to these external events until we dismantle the greater systems at large. So, if we spend time focusing on activities that help us restore and relax, we may be able to respond more to what life throws at us. 

In this article, we’ll share with you the most efficient stress relief activities you can start implementing today. Try them until you’ve found the ones that resonate best with your personality and goals. If none, consider our YouTube techniques. 

 

1.Meditation

Nowadays, everyone is talking about meditation—and for a good reason. Meditation helps you find inner peace by sitting still, breathing, and exploring what your inner world wants to tell you. Instead of focusing on your thoughts, meditation allows you to pay attention to sensations in your body. When was the last time you were present at the moment, and your mind wasn’t going through your to-do list or avoiding that list? 

The good news is that you do not need anything to begin meditation if you have never done it before. Just find a quiet, comfortable place and dedicate 10 minutes to just being in the present moment. You can meditate lying down or sitting; it’s up to you. Guided meditations and breathwork are just two of the many types of meditations available online. It’s important to say neutral to kind things to yourself, like you would a best friend, a child, or someone you are mentoring. 

 

2.Therapy

A person can only do so much on their own when it comes to improving their reaction to stressful situations. We usually look within our beliefs and skills for solutions, ignoring many more efficient options. That is where therapists come in. 

Most of the way we react to external factors is conditioned by our past experiences and the beliefs we have about ourselves and the world around us. A therapist can help you take a closer look at how you’re reacting to stress, the reasons for it, and the alternatives. After just a few sessions, you will notice that your perspective is shifting, and you may be able to react differently to life around you.  

 

3.Journaling

Although journaling may appear to be a monotonous activity, it has numerous mental health benefits. Starting to journal, especially if you are working on gratitude, will change how you feel about your reality. 

If you focus on what you can, you will notice a new lens to old problems. Whatever you focus on grows! It’s your decision whether you’ll focus on positive or negative things in your life. 

 

4.Physical Activity

If you ask any doctor or scientist about the best activity to unwind and recharge, 99% of them will list physical activity as one of the top three suggestions. Your brain releases dopamine and endorphins when you exercise, making you feel good. 

You can start with any physical activity that seems interesting to you, whether it’s swimming, jogging, gym, hiking, or working out at home. Make sure that your chosen physical activity matches your lifestyle. For instance, if you don’t have enough free time, driving to the gym and back home might be a waste of your time. Instead, you can purchase a set of weights and equipment you’ll need to work out at home. 

 

5.Spend Time in Nature

Today’s busy lifestyle makes us forget how important spending time in nature is for us. Walking in the woods is the best way to chill out and recharge.

Explore nature according to your interests. Perhaps you would rather sit in a park and listen to the birds sing or take long walks on the beach. Make the commitment to do that at least once a week, no matter what it is. Try adding it to your calendar and creating a healthy stress-relief routine. 

 

6.Connect with Your Close Ones

We often forget how valuable personal connections are to us. We’ll postpone meeting our best friend for weeks due to work responsibilities, not being aware of how much better we feel after we’ve talked and laughed with them for hours. 

Find the time to be with your friends, family, or your romantic partner. Getting together does not have to require an exciting plan. Oftentimes, the best moments are when we’ll just talk to the ones we love while sitting on our sofa or drinking coffee in our favorite place. 

 

7.Start Your Morning Right

Do you often wake up and instinctively reach for your phone to check your emails and messages? The way you start your morning affects the rest of your day, so maybe you can consider a new habit stop. If you’re immediately focusing on your responsibilities, the day will probably feel too overwhelming for you.

Instead, why not set intentions for that day? You can decide to do a short meditation before you go about your day as well. Maybe you’ll want to mindfully drink your cup of tea or coffee in silence. Your morning ritual could be exactly what you need to become more resilient to the outer world. 

 

Conclusion 

Whether it’s talking to your therapist or going for long walks in nature, find the stress relief activity that makes you feel peaceful and fulfilled. The more you start practicing these activities, the easier it will become to navigate the challenges of the modern lifestyle. Start today, so your tomorrow is something you look forward to!

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Overcoming Obsession with Another Person

/in , , /by

Overcoming Obsession with Another Person

 

Struggling with an obsession with another person can feel overwhelming and all-consuming.

Are obsessive thoughts about someone taking over your life? 🌪️

Obsession can feel all-consuming, like a never-ending loop of thoughts and emotions tied to one person. It often sneaks in when we least expect it, feeding off insecurities, unmet needs, or unresolved feelings. The cycle can be exhausting, affecting your mood, relationships, and overall well-being.

In this video, we’ll dig into the root causes of obsession. Is it unfulfilled attachment? Low self-esteem? Or maybe unmet emotional needs? Understanding the “why” is the first step to breaking free.

We’ll also explore how these obsessions become ingrained in your everyday life. They might seem harmless at first—a fleeting thought or a harmless text—but over time, they can grow into something that feels impossible to escape.

The good news? There’s a way out. I’ll share simple, practical steps to reclaim your mental space and restore balance. Learn how to set boundaries with your thoughts, refocus your energy on personal growth, and find fulfillment beyond the obsession.

You deserve to feel free and in control. Tune in, take notes, and start your journey to overcoming obsession today.

 

 

Ready to take the next step? Book a session with my team 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

How to Have Difficult Conversations

/in , , /by

How to Have Difficult Conversations with People You Care About

 

Not knowing how to have difficult conversations with other people is more common than you think. We often believe that everyone else is so skilled when it comes to complex conversations. Recognizing that the situation feels a bit awkward and that you are not entirely comfortable with it is an important first step toward improving your ability to engage in these conversations. 

Since we all face such situations, it makes sense to learn how to have constructive conversations, even if they are difficult. In this article, we’ve explored some thoughtful approaches to help you prepare for a challenging conversation with someone who is important to you.

 

Examples of Difficult Conversations

Regardless of your age, education, career, and place of living, you’ve probably had a few difficult conversations in your life. That is because we’re constantly interacting with other people, trying to connect on a more meaningful level, or simply being new to situations. One difficult conversation may have been when you moved into your first apartment alone and the landlord confronted you about the noise levels on weekends. 

Many common examples of difficult conversations are those related to work, family, relationships, and friendships. Therefore, setting boundaries with people we care about is challenging for so many reasons. Because we care about them, confronting them on something may be scary, especially if we have not done it before.

Having tough conversations is not always fun, but at least you can be ready for them. 

 

Prepare Yourself for a Difficult Conversation

Regardless of why you need to have a difficult conversation with someone, you can practice it so you feel more confident in what you want to say. Preparation is about knowing what you want to say and what you want to learn from this conversation. 

The closer you are to that person, the more difficult the conversation appears in your mind. Before you share your perspective with another person and allow them to share theirs, it’s important to be as clear and straightforward while having a relaxed tone. 

 

1.Address the Trigger

What was the trigger that led you to decide to have a conversation? Was it one event or a series of events? Was this something that started happening recently, or has it been going on for decades? Knowing which actions or words made a negative impact on you is essential for the conversation. Without it, you will only be able to express how you feel, and the person will most likely have a poor understanding of what you are saying. 

 

2.Understand How You Feel

Oftentimes, we’ll try to rationalize our own feelings in order to be accepted by others. By doing this, you are skipping an important part of a process. Allow yourself to feel what needs to be felt and ensure you have enough time and a safe space to do so. You can journal about it or talk about it with a coach or therapist if you feel you need support. 

 

3.Define Your Talking Points

Once you’ve given yourself time to feel vulnerable, afraid, angry, or sad, it’s time to think about what you want to say to the person. For instance, if you’re breaking up with your partner after trying to save the relationship for so long, it’s essential that you’re clear on what you wish to communicate to them. You don’t have to share every thought you have. The idea is that the conversation is valuable to both sides. 

 

4.Choose the Time and Place 

Consider how you can make this conversation easier for yourself if you are aware that it may be awkward. Think about the places that can help you focus better or that are neutral territory, such as a park. If you think they’ll want to prolong the conversation and drain your energy that way, suggest meeting at a place that allows you to leave whenever you want. On the other hand, if the conversation is very intimate, your place might seem like a better option.  

 

5.Set the Tone

If a person is unaware that you want to have a difficult conversation with them, it would be best to say it before you dive into it. This will give them a moment to prepare and align their feelings with the purpose of the conversation. Make sure you’re being respectful yet very straightforward. Your responsibility is to communicate what you need to say, and the way they feel about it is their responsibility. 

 

After a Difficult Conversation…

There is a big chance that things will not be the same after you have that difficult conversation. The other person has the choice to either do their best to ensure this never happens again or they can get upset and stop talking to you. The important thing to know here is that you can’t control how other people react. 

Also, if you think they only apologized because they wanted to avoid talking further about it, pay closer attention to their actions. Be sure to check how they behave once a similar situation occurs. Are they taking into consideration everything you shared or are they acting the same? 

 

Seeking Help to Establish Boundaries

Any type of relationship might require a difficult conversation from time to time. If this is something that sounds overwhelming to you, consider talking to a therapist. They can help you understand what makes you feel so uncomfortable about this conversation. Beyond that, a therapist will help you learn to establish healthy boundaries. 

Once you understand your needs better, you will be able to communicate them more efficiently to others. However, this is easier said than done. That is why it’s common for many to talk to a mental health professional who can provide support on their journey towards more fulfilling relationships with themselves and others. Come join us by making a virtual session today. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

LGBT Therapist

/in , , /by

The Value of an LGBT Therapist in Your Mental Health Journey

 

Although mental health should be a priority for everyone, a queer person benefits tremendously from seeing an LGBT therapist. The LGBT community faces unique challenges in accessing mental health services, which makes it essential that the person you talk to about your well-being is someone who is experienced in this area. 

One of the most important steps in the mental health process is definitely finding an LGBT-affirming therapist. You may be able to create the life you truly deserve if you learn how to heal your traumas and wounds and become the best version of yourself. If you identify with this topic, know that working closely with an experienced LGBT therapist is essential for your healing journey. We hope that this article will inspire you to take the most significant step toward your ideal future by providing you with additional information.  

 

Unique Challenges of the LGBT Community

Unfortunately, certain societal attitudes toward LGBT people can contribute to stress, anxiety, and depression. We cannot claim that society as a whole is stagnant. Despite this, we continue to see terrible instances of discrimination everywhere we look. The significance of queer folks having LGBT therapists for mental health care is just one part of that. 

Many of these mental health issues are caused entirely or in part by oppressive institutions and behaviors that are still in place in our culture. Providing positive treatment as a mental health practitioner requires understanding these detrimental systems and how they impact LGBT people. LGBT issues like healthcare access, employment and housing discrimination, gendered violence, and social exclusion are major concerns. 

The list of difficulties for the LGBT community goes on and on. These challenges will evolve and take on different shapes as time and society change. Keeping up with how the landscape is evolving and impacting LGBT clients is crucial for mental health professionals because it provides authentic support to those who need it the most. 

 

Why Choose an LGBT Therapist?

If you’re thinking between choosing a mental health therapist with no experience in this area and an LGBT-affirming therapist, there are certain factors you should keep in mind when making this decision. 

The most obvious one is cultural competence. Your therapy can only be successful if your therapist can truly understand the challenges you’re facing and is able to provide realistic tools and techniques in your healing journey. LGBT therapists are trained to understand and affirm diverse sexual orientations and gender identities, making it easier for you to feel understood and supported. 

It goes beyond saying how important it is for members of the LGBT community to feel they’re in a judgment-free environment. Without it, it would be impossible to foster trust and achieve deeper therapeutic work. 

An LGBT therapist will also be able to navigate issues like minority stress, coming out, or family rejection. As someone who has been hurt and is openly looking for support, seeing yourself reflected in a therapist can enhance feelings of belonging and understanding. 

 

The Benefits of LGBT Therapy

LGBT therapy is essential because it provides a safe space for people to explore their thoughts, feelings, and experiences related to their gender identity or sexual orientation in a supportive and nonjudgmental setting. By addressing the particular cultural, family, and internal issues that LGBT people may encounter, this specialized type of counseling goes beyond regular therapy. It is essential for building resilience, increasing self-awareness, and enabling people to deal with the complexity of who they are. 

When talking about the numerous benefits of LGBT therapy, the most noticeable ones include: 

  • Building self-acceptance
  • Healing relationships
  • Resilience and empowerment 
  • Community resources and support

 

Through LGBT counseling, you can develop healthy coping strategies, boost your self-esteem, and develop deeper, more meaningful relationships with others. LGBT therapy’s supportive framework ensures self-acceptance and personal growth are respected and supported, which is essential for living fully.

 

How to Find the Right Therapist

If you want an LGBT-affirming therapist but are already seeing one, ask your current therapist for referrals. The majority of therapists would gladly assist with a reference since they care about their client’s best interests. 

Using an LGBT health search engine is another way to locate a qualified therapist. Within a given zip code, you may look for therapists, psychiatrists, and sex therapists. Therapists indicate their areas of expertise, such as LGBT-affirming and gender-affirming care. If you are looking to pay privately, we have many virtual options for coaching available. 

Lastly, your community might be your finest resource. Ask for referrals from other LGBTA+ people you know who are undergoing therapy. You can also reach out to Facebook and other social media or internet groups and ask for advice. Dozens of recommendations will likely appear quickly, making it easier than searching online. 

 

Conclusion

Therapy is unquestionably crucial for LGBTA+ individuals to overcome mental health obstacles in their lives. If you’re looking for someone to help you feel fulfilled and accomplished, consider reaching out to a queer therapist. These professionals will be able to truly understand and support you on your journey. After all, sometimes we need more than just our friends’ support. 

A qualified therapist can help you get to know yourself better. Once you do that, you will be able to understand better your needs and what you’re looking for in others. The most important part of a queer person’s life is acceptance. However, this is often easier said than done. There are various reasons why you may not feel comfortable about your life. It’s a therapist’s job to make you fall in love with yourself and become excited about the life you have and are building for yourself. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

How to Manage Time Effectively

/in , /by

How to Manage Time Effectively: Self-Employed Success

 

In this video, I’m sharing how to manage time effectively for self-employed individuals.

Being self-employed comes with incredible freedom, but it also demands discipline and structure. Without a boss or set hours, it’s easy to get overwhelmed or lose focus. That’s why developing solid habits and learning how to manage time effectively is essential for success.

As a group private practice owner, I’ve learned how to prioritize tasks, set boundaries with my time, and build consistent routines that help me work smarter, not harder. One of my key strategies is starting each day with a clear plan, outlining the top three priorities to tackle. This keeps me on track and prevents distractions.

I’ll also share how to set realistic goals, delegate effectively, and create a schedule that balances work with personal time. Mastering how to manage time effectively has made a huge difference in my productivity, and I know it can do the same for you.

Watch to learn how to reclaim your time and thrive as your own boss!

 

 

Unlock Your Week’s Full Potential with Our Effective Weekly Plan Example!

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

 

Causes of Burnout

/in , , /by

Causes of Burnout: How to Recognize Them on Time

 

There are numerous causes of burnout, yet several of them are quite common among people who have been feeling overwhelmed and emotionally drained by their work responsibilities. Of course, burnout can happen in other areas of your life, such as planning important events like a wedding. 

The good news is that you can prevent burnout if you’re aware of its common causes and it helps you realize if any of them apply to your life. This allows you to understand the cause of your potential burnout and think about the ways you can prevent it. 

 

What Is a Burnout? 

A burnout is a state in which you feel overwhelmed, emotionally drained, and unmotivated, and it results from ongoing stress in your life or a specific area of your life. Experiencing burnout is not uncommon; however, its consequences can have a tremendous impact on your future. 

For instance, if you’re experiencing burnout from your work responsibilities, you might be unable to work or feel motivated to work for some time. Burnout requires a time of relaxation and introspection to recover, and the amount of that time might differ from one person to another. 

Stress can lead to burnout, yet the two are not the same. Stress can be a reaction to an external event and it often comes with short-term consequences. However, when you’re under stress for a while and you’re unable to recover from it as the responsibilities just keep coming your way, you’re risking burnout. In other words, stress triggers the onset of burnout, not the reverse. Typically, once you experience burnout, depending on the gravity of it, you will not be able to experience more stress and you’ll need to isolate yourself from anything that’s causing your harm.

 

Causes of Burnout

Excessive and sustained work-related stress on the body, mind, and emotions leads to burnout. This can impact other aspects of your life, including your general well-being and happiness. Knowing the signs and causes of burnout can help you protect yourself from its effects and give you a chance to reassess your beliefs and objectives.

 

1.Overwhelming Workload

Being overwhelmed by work is the most common cause of burnout. Having a never-ending to-do list might make you feel like you don’t have control over what’s happening and that you’re not achieving things. Also, you might experience worry and stress when thinking about the next day or week at work, so you’re unable to relax in your free time. 

If this sounds familiar, consider establishing a routine before or after work. For instance, you can schedule activities with your loved ones and your friends or get up early in the morning and dedicate some time to working out and your personal well-being. Of course, if there’s no sign that your work situation is about to change, maybe it’s also a good time to consider looking for another job. 

 

2.Lack of Perspective

If you work in a company that lacks overall perspective and is making its employees do their best without actually informing them how they contribute to business results, you might also experience burnout at a certain point. Working hard and not knowing why is a big trigger for many professionals. They need to feel motivated to do their best, as they are often result-driven and they need to understand how their work fits the bigger picture.

If you can’t see the point of the job you’re doing, there are a few things you can do about it. First, if possible, talk to your superior and share your concerns about not seeing the connection between your work and the results. This might encourage them to take a different approach and inform their employees, so they feel like a crucial part of the company. 

Another thing you can do is find this motivation in other areas of your life. Invest your passion and curiosity into other activities, hobbies, or side projects. Who knows, maybe one of them inspires you to start your own business? 

 

3.Injustice

As humans, we see and experience injustice almost on a daily level. However, if you are being treated poorly at work, this could have a significant impact on your well-being and your self-esteem. Your boss might have personal problems and they are taking it out on you, so you feel scared to suggest new ideas or terrified whenever you’re called in for a performance review. 

If a person is giving you unfair treatment, whether we’re talking about a boss or a colleague, it’s quite unlikely they will change the way they act. Instead, focus on the things you can change. If possible, bring this subject with someone superior to both of you. Toxic behavior should never be tolerated at work and you have every right to protect yourself from it. 

 

4.Unaligned Values

Company values are often overlooked when we apply for a job or start working for a new company. However, if your personal values are quite different from the values of the company you work for, you might feel unsatisfied or stressed. For instance, if the company you work for doesn’t appreciate the personal time and family responsibilities of its employees, someone with children might find it quite difficult. 

If you feel that your values are not being respected at work, think about what can be done about it. For instance, you might want to suggest working from home on certain days or having a more flexible schedule. Whatever you do, make sure you find a way to respect your values at work. If that’s not possible, maybe that’s not the right environment for you. 

 

5.Issues with Your Boss

If you have a problem with your boss, it may not be personal. Working with people who have different personalities and mentalities from yours is not easy. Sometimes, staff will have an issue with their leader’s management style, which can impact their results. Other times, the boss might have specific expectations that are challenging for most staff members. 

In cases like this, think about the possibility of finding common ground. Maybe your boss will appreciate it if you suggest they include all key information in an email that’s sent to all employees instead of sharing it casually in meetings. 

If that’s not an option, consider talking to a therapist about your concerns regarding burnout. Besides listening to you, a therapist can help you establish healthy boundaries and understand what type of work environment you need to truly blossom. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Communication Is Key

/in , , /by

Communication Is Key to All Your Relationships

 

How often have you said the following words, ‘Communication is key’? Maybe you’ve said to a friend to remind them that they need to communicate how they feel to their romantic partner or maybe you’ve said it to remind your coworker that it’s always best to clarify everything before it becomes a problem at work.

Regardless of the relationship, communication is crucial to understanding the other person. Without it, we wouldn’t be able to state our needs and desires or understand what our partner, friend, or relative thinks or feels. Even though we’re all aware of the importance of communication, we need a constant reminder that it’s truly the only language that can bring us closer to others and even help us understand ourselves better.

 

Why Communication Matters?

Everything is communication. From the minute a baby is born, it is communicating with the world. Although babies will not use words, their close environment gives an idea of the baby’s needs due to the communication clue it provides. As we start talking, we turn to words to explain the significance of things, people, and events around us.

Even when we’re silent, we’re communicating. If you’re silent in a business meeting, you’re communicating that you’re interested in the topic and that the speaker has your full attention. Non-verbal communication is an efficient way to express ourselves and interact with our environment. For instance, crossing your arms and looking at your phone in that same business meeting mentioned above sends a very different message from maintaining eye contact with your superior.

However, in intimate relationships, communication is even more important. When we’re in a relationship or a friendship, we want to feel close to the other person. This would be impossible without communication. Getting to know each other can only be done when communicating with the other person, whether verbally or non-verbally. So, if we all know communication is key for a relationship to work, why do many couples go through periods of discussion or feel that the other person doesn’t understand them?

 

Interpretation of Communication

Do you remember the last time when you thought you were clear about something and the other person still misunderstood you completely? Most often, we fight when our interpretations of something are not the same. This occurs when there is a lack of quality communication between two or more people, so there is more space for making assumptions. For instance, someone not responding to your text right away can be interpreted as a lack of interest, whereas the other person simply might be busy at the moment or want to take time to respond properly.

The more intimate the relationship becomes, the more these examples occur. In couples therapy, it is very frequent that partners blame each other for misunderstandings. The truth is that blaming another person won’t make the problem go away. Communication is the only solution. We’re all unique and have unique needs. The more you communicate with your partner, friend, or coworker, there will be less space for wrong interpretations.

 

How to Communicate with Success

The great thing about communication is that it’s a skill that everyone can practice. Even if you think that you’re not naturally good at communication, there are so many different ways to communicate that you’ll easily find the one that seems natural to you. Some people love expressing themselves through long, meaningful conversations, while others might need time to think first and they’ll come to you and share their point of view in a few sentences. That said, there is no good or bad way to communicate—as long as everyone is being respectful.

If you don’t feel comfortable sharing how you feel in a one-on-one conversation, you might feel better about the idea of writing down all your thoughts on a piece of paper. With intimate relationships, you can even think of songs that represent how you feel and open the conversation that way. Whatever works for you best.

 

1.Understand Yourself First

Before sharing how you feel or think with anyone else, talk to yourself first. If you feel triggered about something your partner has said, are you aware of the reason for this emotional reaction? If you feel unappreciated at work, have you thought about the certain situations that led to that result? Do these situations have something in common?

A lot of communication stops at finding the person to blame, which is not a solution. Knowing that your partner did something that hurt you will not help you feel better or prevent it from happening again. You will need to understand what you need in order to feel safe. Once you know what is troubling you, why, and what can be done about it, that can be considered finding the solution to the problem.

 

2.Be Clear About It

Different people communicate differently. That is why it’s important to be clear whenever you’re communicating with another person. This is especially true when communicating with your close friends and romantic partner, as we tend to believe that they know us so well that it’s easy for them to understand what we want to say.

A good piece of advice would be not to start a conversation until you’re sure about what you want to say. Not being clear on your intentions might lead to an even bigger problem and the other person might become confused or take further precautions because they’re not certain they understand the issue.

 

Open With a Monologue, Close With a Dialogue

For many people, it’s important to not be interrupted when talking about sensitive topics, which is completely fine. However, keep in mind that successful communication requires more than one person. After you’ve said what needed to be said, show you’re curious to hear what the other person thinks about it and if they have any questions. This will also prevent any misunderstandings in the future.

The best way to communicate is to invite another person openly to a safe space in which you both feel comfortable speaking your mind. If that space is only reserved for you or them, it will have consequences for your relationship. A great way to learn communication skills and ways to express yourself more authentically is through therapy, whether it’s for you as a couple or you alone. Once you learn how to communicate successfully, you’ll be able to connect better with people who matter to you and have more meaningful relationships with them.

 

Couples Communication Strategies

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.