How Do I Talk To People?

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How Do I Talk To People at Social Gatherings?

 

Struggling to navigate social situations and wondering, “How do I talk to people?” You’re not alone!

Figuring out how to talk to people you don’t know is a huge part of socializing. Small talk can feel like a challenge, but with the right approach, it becomes much easier.

Whether you’re experiencing anxiety, feeling drained, or just not loving “peopling,” socializing can be tough. But knowing how to talk to people in a way that feels natural is a skill that can be developed.

In this video, I’ll share practical strategies for making social events more enjoyable. From knowing how to talk to someone you’ve just met to keeping conversations flowing with those you already know, you’ll learn tips to feel more comfortable and confident.

We’ll explore how body language, active listening, and conversation starters can improve how you talk to people. Plus, I’ll give advice for handling awkward silences and managing social boundaries.

If socializing feels exhausting, I’ll also discuss ways to recharge and engage with others on your own terms, without feeling drained.

You deserve to connect with others in a way that feels authentic and true to you.

Let’s dive into how you can talk to someone with confidence, clarity, and ease.

 

 

Couples Communication Strategies

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibility multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Reflective Listening

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Your Guide to Reflective Listening

 

Reflective Listening goes beyond active and passive listening by incorporating repeating and paraphrasing. You’ve likely heard of active and passive listening, but have you considered this deeper approach? If these concepts are new to you, read our guide for a clearer understanding.

In this article, you will learn the benefits of reflective listening and why it is a crucial skill for any relationship.

 

Degrees of Active Listening

It helps when you actively pay attention and listen to people around you, whether it’s in your professional or personal life.

Successful communication requires as much learning how to listen as well as how to speak. 

Hearing someone speak and truly listening to them are two entirely unique things. If we’re actively listening, it means that this person has our full attention and we’re doing our best to understand what they are communicating to us. 

 

1.Repeating

Repeating is the first degree of active listening, and it refers to repeating the words you’ve heard in the conversation to make sure you understand the person correctly. It requires paying attention, remembering the words, and then saying them back to the speaker. As opposed to passive listening, repeating lets the other person know that you are paying attention and want to understand what they are saying.

 

2.Paraphrasing

By repeating, you are practically saying the exact same words to confirm the speaker’s intentions. Instead of mirroring the exact words, with paraphrasing, you choose similar words yet not the same. This approach shows the other person that you’ve resonated with the shared information. It also allows you to remember that information more easily because you use words and phrases that you connect with better.

 

3.Reflecting

At first, paraphrasing and reflecting might seem very similar. However, reflecting involves taking a moment to think about the information shared in the conversation and reflecting on it in your words. You can summarize the conversation or provide a few examples to confirm your understanding. Reflecting can be the most profound level of listening, where the listener resonates with all the conversation’s content.

 

What Is Reflective Listening?

Reflective listening is beneficial across all areas. It can help you communicate more efficiently with your new coworkers, meet your superior’s demands easily, and strengthen your romantic relationship or friendship.

Reflective listening requires a conversation. The person who is listening will speak soon to reflect on what has been said, which is very different from passive listening. For example, if your boss is explaining the details of a new project, you will want to reflect on it, ask questions, and confirm if all is clear. 

It’s also worth mentioning that reflective listening occurs in one-on-one conversations or in small groups, as it might be challenging during a business conference with 50 people. That is what makes reflective listening a valuable communication tool that helps build relationships. This intimate aspect guarantees mutual understanding and the ability to collaborate towards a shared objective, whatever it may be. 

 

Key Components of Reflective Listening

If you’re looking to become a master in reflective listening, you will have to first learn its key components. These components will help you truly listen to other people and learn from them. 

Reflective listening consists of four key components: 

  • Active listening—listening to the speaker with your full attention without any distractions 
  • Paraphrasing—repeating what the speaker said back to them, yet in your own words
  • Clarification—asking questions to ensure understanding or raising any confusion you have
  • Empathizing—acknowledging the speaker’s thoughts and emotions and taking them into account during the conversation 

 

Benefits of Reflective Listening

Obviously, there are many benefits of reflective listening, especially when compared to passive listening. When we’re dedicated to truly listening to the person talking to us, we’re able to understand their perspective and strengthen the connection with them based on the information received, both verbally and non-verbally. 

Reflective listening also strengthens trust. Knowing you are being listened to carefully encourages you to share more and actively seek opportunities to continue communicating with this person. Conversely, people who listen and think about what was said are usually the ones that others turn to for comfort, a shoulder to cry on, advice, or just to vent. 

Also, reflective listening reduces misunderstandings and conflicts. Hearing someone speak and assuming you know what they think and feel often leads to confusion and conflicts. If you’re invested, it becomes easier to have empathy for the other person. In other words, understanding their intentions, thought processes, emotions, and so much more becomes easier if you listen closely. 

That is what makes reflective listening valuable in problem-solving situations as well. Whenever a conflict arises, whether it’s at work, home, or somewhere else, using this tool can enable both sides to find common ground because they’ll have a clearer idea of why the conflict occurred in the first place. 

 

How to Practice Reflective Listening

With that in mind, you may be wondering how to start reflective listening today and reap its benefits. Once you’ve determined that you want to become better at listening to people around you, there are certain things to keep in mind to ensure you’re doing a good job. 

Firstly, whenever you need to listen to someone, make sure you’ve eliminated all the distractions. Find a comfortable place to have a conversation, turn off your phone, close the doors, and decide to focus only on the person in front of you. 

During the conversation, be mindful of nonverbal cues. Pay attention to the speaker’s hands, sitting position, eye movement, and any other detail that can fill in the picture of how they feel or what they think about the matter discussed. Also, use your nonverbal cues to show support. Look them in their eyes while they are talking and nod anytime something resonates with you.

When the other person finishes speaking, don’t just say “I understand” and end the conversation by making it about yourself instantly. Utilize this moment to contemplate the spoken words, verify their accuracy, and stimulate conversation by posing questions. This shows that you are doing your best to improve the relationship you have with that person. 

If this all feels confusing, book a session and we can help you understand it more. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients’ lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Wildest Things to Do With Your Boyfriend

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Wildest Things to Do With Your Boyfriend

 

Are you looking for some of the wildest things to do with your boyfriend to spice up your relationship a bit? No matter the season, meaningful dates allow you to embrace your wild side while also celebrating your love.

Before we dive into our list of ideas, keep in mind that what is wild for one person might not be interesting for another. Think about your personalities and interests, and try to come up with the options that will become your craziest memories. We have put together a list of ideas that can help you make the best plan. These ideas will help you forget about your everyday life and focus on the fun and excitement!

1.Night in an Unusual Stay

There’s nothing wrong with booking a fancy, five-star hotel to relax and connect. However, if you’re both into something more adventurous, there are many alternatives. For example, you might want to book a night in an igloo, treehouse, yurt, cave hotel, or a boat. Any of these ideas will definitely provide you with incredible memories. Importantly, you will see another side of your partner and possibly learn something new.

While you’re there, surprise your partner with a sexy plan, such as roleplaying or outdoor sex. Who said you can do two things at once?

 

2.Fantasy Roleplay Night

Okay, we already mentioned roleplay as a suggestion to make your stay even more memorable. Yet, you can truly take your fantasy and roleplay to another level. You can plan an entire night around it. Whichever characters you want to embody that night, make sure that you think of all the details that can help you truly become this person.

Think of clothes, wigs, make-up, environment, accents, phrases, and anything else that can turn on your partner. For instance, if they’re a Star Wars fan, dress as Princess Leia, and your partner can be Han Solo for a night.

 

3.Five Senses Evening

We often forget how sensory information can be impactful, especially in seduction. How about planning an entire night around driving each other crazy by activating their five senses? You can start the evening by feeding each other with sushi or any other finger food. When feeding them, ask them to close their eyes or wear a blindfold to focus on how the food tastes.

Then, offer them a massage with an aromatic oil that will help you set the mood right. Make sure that the touch is sensual. You can even whisper something in their ear to prepare them for this adventurous night. Put on sensual music, light a few candles, and use clothes made of breathable fabrics like silk or organic cotton for a full experience.

4.Movie Director for a Night

Even if you’re not so much into movies or directing, this one is fun. Tell your partner to direct one night, and you’ll direct another. In other words, write the script with all the technical instructions on how to behave, talk, walk, and dress. Build a story that will be exciting for both of you. For instance, strangers seducing each other in a bar, having wild sex in your car in your garage, or anything else that will turn you on.

Just think about how interesting it can be to play the role that your partner has created for you and immerse yourself in their story. You can come back to this scenario anytime you need to escape from your everyday life and want to become someone else just for fun. Bonus points for recording the night and watching it later! Also, plan to use a safeword.

5.Surprise Your Partner with an Unplanned Road Trip

Who doesn’t like safe surprises? Well, pack your partner’s and your stuff and surprise them with a road trip. If you two are playful, tease them with hints along the ride. While you’re building the excitement around what’s coming, make sure you enjoy this experience too.

You can spend a night in a bed and breakfast outside the city or a hotel in a different state, depending on your preferences. After all, it’s more about surprising your partner and the ride to the location than the location itself. Being adventurous like this can introduce a new dynamic in your relationship and encourage your partner to do the same.

 

Embrace Your Wild Side

We all tend to get caught up in our daily responsibilities that are not so wild. On the contrary, our lives become very predictable, and our relationships can help us remember what excites us, how we feel when we are adventurous, and what exactly we need to bring out our wildest selves.

Oftentimes, our relationships are our safest spaces, so it’s easier to explore a side of us we don’t see so often with someone we trust. Whatever seems wild to you can be a great idea for a date or a unique experience with your partner. Whether that’s sex in public or sending sexy messages throughout the day to prepare yourself for a wild night, just do it. When you start to use these parts of you, it is encouraging to continue doing so!

Having fun is so crucial for intimacy, and we often completely forget about it. That’s why I named my book Playtime. 

We prioritize everything else that feels more aligned with our adult life; however, being wild and playful is essential!

If this is something you’ve been thinking about for a while, talk to your partner and start small if you don’t feel ready to try one of the ideas mentioned above. Send a sexy photo or practice dirty talk before sex.

Very soon, you’ll both realize how essential these moments are for your relationship. If you want to talk more about this, book a session with us or start your journey at home with kink 101. 

 

Kinky Sex: How to Get Started

Kinky Sex

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients’ lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Real Female Anatomy

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You’ve Been Misled About Real Female Anatomy – Here’s the Truth!

 

Have you ever wondered what’s really going on with real female anatomy?

There’s a lot of misinformation out there. Outdated textbooks and pop culture myths often misrepresent how female bodies actually work. Many people, including women, are left with incomplete or incorrect understandings of anatomy, pleasure, and function. These misconceptions can create confusion, shame, and even interfere with healthy relationships.

As an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist and author on female sexuality, I’m here to clear things up in just a few minutes! We’ll cover the facts most people never learned. This includes what’s missing from common anatomy diagrams, why misconceptions persist, and how understanding real female anatomy can improve everything from medical care to intimacy.

In today’s world, knowledge is power. Empower yourself with accurate information that celebrates the true diversity and beauty of female anatomy. This journey is not only about learning facts; it’s about reclaiming our narratives and understanding our bodies deeply.

Let’s set the record straight. Ready to learn the truth?

 

BLISS: Proven Methods for Improving the Female Orgasm

 

“What is the Vulva” from Playtime: A Guide To Sexual Conquests For Women

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibility multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Standing Sex Positions

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11 Best Standing Sex Positions To Elevate Pleasure, According To Sex Experts

 

Standing sex positions have become an exciting way for couples to connect physically and emotionally. Dr. Amanda Pasciucco, a leading therapist, shares her expert insights in a Women’s Health article on how standing sex can refresh and deepen your relationship.

 

Why Try Standing Sex?

Standing positions offer an adventurous change from traditional bedroom routines. Dr. Pasciucco highlights that these positions encourage greater physical closeness, requiring more flexibility and coordination. “Standing together can create a sense of vulnerability and connection,” she notes, helping couples build a stronger emotional bond. This sense of vulnerability often leads to a more authentic and deeper connection between partners.

Benefits of Standing Positions

One major advantage of standing positions is the spontaneity they bring. By breaking free from the usual patterns, couples can explore new dynamics. Dr. Amanda explains that standing positions foster better communication and physical and emotional alignment. This dynamic can deepen intimacy and strengthen trust between partners, leading to a more rewarding and fulfilling sexual experience. Standing sex can also encourage couples to become more in tune with each other’s body language, promoting mutual understanding and closeness.

Exploring New Positions

Dr. Pasciucco suggests starting with slow experimentation for couples new to standing positions. Positions like “standing doggy style” or “standing missionary” offer a variety of sensations, allowing partners to explore new forms of closeness and connection. Don’t be afraid to adjust or modify positions to find what works best. The key is to communicate openly about comfort and pleasure, allowing both partners to fully enjoy the experience.

Emotional Intimacy and Standing Positions

Standing positions are not just about the physical experience—they can also strengthen emotional intimacy. As Dr. Amanda explains, these positions require partners to stay more in tune with each other’s needs and comfort. The closeness that comes with standing sex can lead to deeper emotional connections and better communication, which are important for a healthy relationship.

Read the article in Women’s Health to learn about the 11 Best Standing Sex Positions

Conclusion

Standing positions are a fun and intimate way to spice up your relationship. With Dr. Pasciucco’s insights, couples can use standing sex as an opportunity to grow closer, both physically and emotionally. By communicating openly and exploring new positions, you can enhance your connection and bring more excitement into your intimate life. Plus, standing sex can be a great way to introduce spontaneity, trust, and variety into your sexual routine.

Author:

For more tips and insights, check out the original article on Women’s Health.

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer), PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists helps all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Does Long-Distance Relationship Work? 

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Does Long-Distance Relationship Work? 

 

To be able to respond to the question ‘Does long-distance relationships work?’ we’ll first have to look into context. Some long-distance relationships work, and others don’t. 

It’s important to look closer at couples who have managed to maintain their relationship for years, no matter how far and for how long they were apart. 

What are they doing to stay in love and dedicated to their relationship? How do they keep things interesting while being apart? This article investigates what long-distance relationships need.

 

Benefits of Long-Distance Relationships

Before we explore what works and what doesn’t in this type of relationship, let’s remind us all of some valuable benefits long-distance has for a relationship. Unlike conventional relationships, you are not able to parallel play, meaning you spend time snuggled together watching TV, doing chores, or scrolling on your phones while sitting on your couch. 

With long-distance relationships (LDRs), the time you dedicate to each other is often more valuable than that of couples who live together. When you’re on a call with each other, you are interested in hearing about their day and the details. Your conversations are more dynamic and depthful because you don’t have other clues besides the information they’re giving you. 

Another thing that long-distance relationships help with is strengthening independence. Let’s admit it: we’re all guilty of falling in love with a new person, and our world starts revolving around them and their needs. With LDRs, the distance actually helps you maintain your old habits and connections. 

Knowing that your partner is not with you physically puts more focus on the need to maintain social interactions with other people and nurture your own life. 

In relation to physical intimacy, those who have lived with a partner for an extended period of time are aware of how sex can be neglected. With LDRs, you’re anticipating the arrival of your partner and often have a yearning desire to make up for the time you were apart. 

 

Factors that Make Long-Distance Relationships Work

If you’ve met the right person yet they don’t live in your city or even country, there is a way to make your long-distance relationship work. You may have been encouraged by some of your friends or family not to invest time in this relationship. I get that—as I was once a young adult who told someone not to invest in their love that was across the world. 

However, if you’re in love and you know this is your person, you just know. It doesn’t matter where they live. Fortunately, there are factors that can help you make that LDR work and transform it into one of the best experiences of your life. Isn’t that what love is about, after all—enhancing the life you have? 

 

Effective Communication

Communication is key in all relationships, especially in long-distance relationships. It is critical to understand which communication styles you both prefer, as well as how to communicate and prioritize information shared during your conversation. 

If you’re in an LDR, take some time to work on your communication strategy. Which things are unacceptable for you? Meaning, are there boundaries you have to clearly state that they may not understand? 

Similarly, which things do you need from your partner when you’re sharing something intimate or vulnerable? Do you want emotional attunement or problem solving alongside one another? 

Sharing these points can help you understand each other better and connect on a more meaningful level. Similarly, it will stop you from having arguments that could have been avoided.

 

Set Mutual Goals

Setting common goals can help you feel more like a team. This goal can be visiting each other, going on a vacation together, or ultimately moving in instead of having parallel lives. 

Whatever the goal, make sure you both are dedicated to working towards achieving it. It’s not so much about the goal as it is about the shared passion you have for something. 

This can remind you that although you’re not close to each other, you have the same goals and values for this relationship. 

These goals don’t have to be as big as vacations or spending months together. You can plan a Friday date night where you’d each go to your favorite restaurant and meet back up after for a video call. Take photos of the menu and meals so you can share later if you would like! This can help you get through a stressful week when you might not have much time for each other. 

 

Motivate Each Other to be Independent 

Despite the temptation to maintain constant connection, independence is essential in all relationships. If you notice that your partner is feeling a bit down these days, keep in mind that face-to-face interactions can help them feel a bit better. I suggest that they go meet a friend or go to the gym for a fitness class to workout alongside new people. 

It’s unrealistic for both yourself and your partner to believe that you are the only person who can help them in such a situation. Friends, colleagues, and people we meet in our everyday lives are incredibly important and can have a positive impact on how we connect with our romantic partners. 

 

Trust

Relationships can’t survive without trust. If there is a lack of trust between you and your partner, it will affect your entire relationship. If you start questioning where they have been or who they are talking to, maybe ask for a calendar to see how they spend their free time. Most often, if we have no proof that we can’t trust our romantic partner, it is about ourselves rather than them. If this is the case for you and you make up stories about what your partner could be doing, consider talking to a therapist who can help you explore the source of this. 

LDRs require a lot of trust. If this is an issue in your relationship, talk to your partner as well. Opening up about this topic and sharing what you need to feel safe can help them provide you with what you need. Keep in mind that trust is something that is built; it’s not given. In other words, find ways to build and maintain the trust that works for you both. Some people want to see browser histories and others want to be prioritized on weekend nights for video calls. 

 

All Relationships Require Work

Do not be discouraged if all of your friends have romantic partners and you are the only one in a long-distance relationship. All relationships require work, regardless of their form. You have to get to know the person to be able to connect with them in a way that is beneficial for both of you. Relationships between two people all look different, so comparing yourself won’t matter. Your life while visiting your long-distance partner looks much different than your life when you and your partner aren’t near one another. 

Once you’ve passed that first stage of being in love, you’ll still need to dedicate a lot of your time and energy to strengthening your relationship. Whether it’s looking for efficient techniques to manage discussions or to learn each other’s love language, there is something new to learn about your partner. The moment you don’t have something new to learn is the moment Eros has fallen asleep in the romance. Instead, continue to discover who your beloved is, as this will help you maintain the spark that many couples report losing. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit 4rus for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

How to Stop Porn Addiction

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How to Stop Porn Addiction & Become Free

 

If you have been wondering how to stop porn addiction, you have come to the right place. Addiction of any kind is a serious issue, and sometimes overcoming addictive behaviors requires more than just willpower. If this is the case for you, you can experiment with different techniques and approaches to see if one of them helps you stop watching it. 

Before we dive into these techniques, let’s go a few steps back and look closely at porn addiction, why and when it occurs, and other relevant information that could help you understand why you can quit this easily. 

 

Understanding Porn Addiction

Porn addiction is frequently misinterpreted in the context of behavioral addictions. This keeps this addiction stigmatized, making it hard to identify. When talking about porn, there is still a lot of disagreement among medical experts on the boundaries between addiction and compulsion. However, there is no doubt that you can get addicted to porn. Not giving this topic the respect and seriousness it deserves makes it only harder for those struggling with this addiction. Not knowing what to do, who to ask for help, and which steps to follow is the first problem porn addicts face when they try to stop their addiction. 

What’s important to say is whether you have a porn addiction or compulsion; seeking help in the form of therapy is essential to stop watching porn. Porn addiction, or the inability to control the urge to view porn, is one of the most common addictions, and you have every right to take the path of quitting it when you’re ready.

 

Signs of Porn Addiction

Watching porn can have numerous negative consequences on your life. Excessive porn time can impact your sleep quality and time, make you ignore or forget about your responsibilities. And even impact how you connect romantically with other people. After all, porn can affect the expectations you might have from your romantic partner in bed and out of it. 

To help you understand whether you or someone close to you has a porn addiction, we’ve gathered porn addiction signs to be aware of. One of the most obvious ones is compulsive watching, when watching pornography becomes something you have almost no control over. 

Also, if you’re noticing you’re spending more time watching porn than before, it could be a sign of addiction. Another thing to pay attention to is whether porn is preventing you from performing your daily tasks, whether it’s at work/school or at home. As mentioned above, relationship problems are also one of the common signs of porn addiction. 

Although this sign is not very obvious at first, the need to watch more extreme or varied content is typical with porn addicts. The content you used to watch before might not do the work for you anymore. So you need something that will excite you on another level. 

Occasionally, individuals struggling with a porn addiction may choose to avoid social events or comply with the minimum expectations of others in order to quickly return to porn. 

Taking all that into consideration, it’s pretty obvious that porn addiction is a serious problem. If you’ve tried to stop it on your own, you might have experienced withdrawal symptoms, such as irritability, restlessness, or anxiety. This is your nervous system reacting to the lack of something it got used to, making it really difficult to continue being motivated about stopping your porn addiction. 

 

Steps to Stopping Porn Addiction

Just because stopping porn addiction is hard for you, it doesn’t mean it’s impossible. If people can get rid of their drug or alcohol addiction, you can do the same. There are certain steps and ideas that are recommended for people with porn addiction. If you’ve tried quitting before or this is your first time, follow these ideas and implement them as naturally as you. Keep in mind that the addiction didn’t appear overnight, so it certainly won’t disappear quickly either. 

 

1.Admit You Have a Problem

We know—it’s not easy. Admitting you have a problem implies you have to find a solution. However, what if it’s enough for now just to admit that you have a problem and not try to search for a solution? After you’ve admitted to yourself or someone you trust that you have a problem. Take a moment to feel whatever feels right at that time. Jumping into problem-solving mode will probably lead to counterproductive results. 

 

2.Start with Small Goals

With addictions, it’s quite difficult to get rid of them completely at once. Instead, start with smaller goals of watching porn every other day and limiting your time. Depending on how much you used to spend watching pornography, the goal should be a representation of a tiny advancement. 

 

3.Identify Your Triggers

A lot of people have problems with addictions because they use them as a way to run from stress. For instance, you might notice that your trigger is coming home tired from work and wanting to disconnect from thinking about your endless to-do list. Maybe you’re too bored, so porn provides you with a fantasy world where everything is possible. Whatever the reason, understanding it can help you find alternative solutions.

 

4.Replace Porn Watching with Healthy Habits

You can’t just expect to quit watching porn and not replace this habit with something else. If you’ve spent hours every day watching porn and then suddenly stopped, this void might remind you of your addiction. Instead, remind yourself of hobbies and activities you used to enjoy doing. Spend more time with your friends, go to the gym, take long walks, and listen to your favorite podcast. Creating a list of ideas can also help you avoid feeling like you have too much free time now when you’re quitting porn-watching. 

 

The Power of the Therapy

The best thing to do when trying to quit any type of addiction is to reach out to a recommended therapist and share your problem with them. A mental health professional can provide you with useful information on how to stay on the recovery path and break free from the addiction. After all, it’s the only way to get your life into your own hands again!

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

 

What Happens When a Man Is Sexually Deprived?

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What Happens When a Man Is Sexually Deprived?

 

Ever wondered What Happens When a Man Is Sexually Deprived?

In this video, we’ll dive into the psychological, emotional, and physical effects of going without intimacy for long periods as a man.

So, what happens when a man is sexually deprived? For starters, his mood can take a serious hit. Irritability, frustration, and even feelings of loneliness can become more prominent. A lack of physical intimacy can also lead to lower self-esteem and increased stress levels, affecting his daily interactions and relationships.

On a biological level, sexual deprivation can impact testosterone levels, sometimes leading to decreased energy, reduced motivation, and even trouble focusing. It may also contribute to disrupted sleep patterns and increased tension in the body.

But it’s not all negative—what happens when a man is sexually deprived can also include unexpected benefits. Some men experience heightened creativity, stronger discipline, and a chance to focus on personal growth without distractions.

From relationship struggles to hormonal shifts and potential advantages, this topic is more complex than you might think! Stay tuned as we break it all down.

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Relationships without Sex

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Relationships without Sex: Cheat Sheet for Success

 

We’ve heard so many times how sex is an essential component of every relationship, yet what happens with relationships without sex? In other words, can relationships without sex survive? Let’s answer that really quickly here: yes! As long as both partners are comfortable with not having sex and connecting on other levels than sex, these relationships can be equally fulfilling as the ones where sex happens. 

So, how can you build a strong relationship without sex? Which things do you need to take care of if sex is not among intimacy acts in your relationships? In this article, we’ll share a cheat sheet for building successful relationships without sex. 

 

Reasons to Have Sexless Relationships

There are many reasons why couples might decide to have a relationship without sex. Either you or your partner can have a lack of libido, feel like sex is not one of your priorities, or you want to strengthen other aspects of your relationship. Whatever the reason, the only thing that matters is that both you and your partner feel good about that decision.

Some couples decide to have a sexless relationship during the dating phase, while others will decide to stop having sex when they’re already in a relationship. It’s important to keep in mind that there is a difference between deciding to have a sexless relationship and ending in one. The first one is your conscious choice, and the second one is something that happens as a consequence of a relationship.

Many couples are now looking to learn and build a strong connection through other types of intimacy. Besides sex, there are numerous ways you can feel close to your partner. The ones you decide to work on more will depend on your and your partner’s needs. 

 

Other Types of Intimacy

Mostly, when we talk about intimacy, we’ll first think of sex. However, a hug, a deep conversation, cuddling, or taking a long bath together are all examples of intimacy that don’t include sex. 

 

Emotional Intimacy

How ready and able are you and your partner to connect on a profound, significant emotional level? Emotional intimacy goes beyond simply expressing your feelings. It requires trust as well as the readiness to be honest and open about more profound emotions, emotions, and behaviors.

Talking about your early years or anything personal (without going beyond your personal boundaries) is one approach to establishing an emotional connection. In order to have enough trust, vulnerability, and awareness to support one another when a significant event occurs, it is crucial that you and your partner engage in emotional intimacy outside of times of crisis. 

 

Intellectual Intimacy

Having a healthy curiosity and learning from one another is the most basic definition of intellectual intimacy. Feeling comfortable discussing a wide range of subjects and sharing your opinions while remaining receptive to those of others are hallmarks of healthy intellectual closeness.

Even if you have different viewpoints, mutual regard enables you to connect and talk about subjects outside of your typical daily rapport. Reading poetry, visiting art institutions, or seeing a thought-provoking movie together are all ways to cultivate intellectual connection. Intellectual intimacy is about recognizing your differences and figuring out how to connect.

 

Spiritual Intimacy

Because spirituality is so individualized, spiritual connection may mean many different things. The extent to which you and your partner communicate your ideas, emotions, convictions, and experiences about religion, spirituality, morality, the afterlife, and other associated topics is generally referred to as spiritual intimacy.

While religious ideas and practices can be a component of one’s spirituality, spirituality is not necessarily about religion. The pursuit of purpose in life and your connection to something greater than yourself are both included in the broader idea of spirituality.

 

Social Intimacy

The extent to which you and your partner spend time together as a pair and have similar interests is known as social intimacy. What activities do you two engage in together? Do you enjoy spending time together?

This does not imply that you must constantly do or accomplish everything together. Spending enjoyable time with others while maintaining alone time is the essence of social closeness. After all, you need both! Trying something new together is a fantastic approach to developing social connections. Taking cooking courses, taking a new yoga class, trying a new restaurant, or learning how to dance salsa.

 

How to Strengthen a Relationship without Sex

Intimacy is a relationship that is developed over time through shared experiences and activities. It doesn’t happen immediately. The quality of your connections is especially crucial since being close to someone or having daily contact with them does not equate to deep or even healthy closeness. 

Many couples will believe that they’ll become more intimate with their partner just because they will spend more time together, whether it’s at home or on a vacation. Intimacy requires work. You both have to be willing to work on building different types of intimacy in your relationship. 

Oftentimes, when we take one intimacy type out of the equation, there is more focus on the void that the lack of this type of intimacy created instead of focusing on implementing a range of activities that will strengthen how you connect emotionally, intellectually, or spiritually. 

Another thing that would be valuable to mention here is boundaries around your decision to not have sex. Although you’re both clear about not wanting sex in your relationship, you might have different emotions and thoughts attached to that decision. 

For instance, your partner might feel uncomfortable if you or someone else makes a joke about that decision. That is why it’s essential to discuss whether or not you want to even mention sex in your future, how to mention it, etc. Keeping in mind what works best for you will help you feel even better about this decision!

 

Make the Best of Your Relationship

In the end, it’s not sex that will decide whether your relationship will pass the test of time. Everything plays a key role when two people are building a relationship, from how you spend your free time together to how much you pay attention to tiny details. Each relationship is unique, so what works well for one might not work well for another. Only you and your partner will have the best idea of what you need in order to grow as a couple. Talking to your friends makes sense in terms of support, yet the crucial decisions should be made after talking heart-to-heart with your partner. 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Infidelity Counseling

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Infidelity Counseling: What Is It & Does It Work? 

 

If your relationship has suffered from infidelity or you are the other woman or man, you may have been told to seek infidelity counseling. An infidelity-related trauma can definitely have a profound impact on everyone involved. Rebuilding the connection of your relationship is not easy, so that is why people consider infidelity therapy before they decide what to do next. 

This is especially important if children are involved or if the separation is complicated due to generated assets or running a business together. Infidelity counseling can help the couple understand why this affair happened and what each person needs in order to restore trust and intimacy. It can also help the other person to grieve what they have lost. That said, the outcome of what happens after therapy or coaching will be different from person to person.

 

Why Do People Cheat?

Most of us are good at judging others and reading about other couples who have had affairs, all the while preventing us from understanding the causes of unfaithfulness. First and foremost, it’s important to state that a person who is being cheated doesn’t deserve it. Relationships are more complicated than they appear. Even though you can believe that you give your best, the other person will not often do the same, and unfortunately, this is where the problem begins. 

So, why do people cheat? Interestingly, there are a lot of reasons why one person chooses to cheat and the other does not. Some reasons are quite obvious; however, there are also those we rarely talk about. 

 

Lack of Communication

Communication is one of many ways to be intimate with your partner. If your relationship or marriage is suffering from a lack of communication, this might push one of you into seeking opportunities to connect with other people. This connection can be physical, emotional, or both. It might start as opening up to someone willing to listen and grow into an affair. 

 

Financial Pressure

Most couples decide to divorce because of financial problems and disagreements, and it’s also one of the most common reasons for infidelity. Being unable to meet your partner’s expectations or feeling overwhelmed by financial issues can significantly impact the intimacy within your relationship or marriage. 

 

Not Being Compatible

Typically, you’d assume that couples are together because of their compatibility. However, that doesn’t have to be the case. Sometimes, a person will choose their partner based on other factors and completely ignore the compatibility. For instance, you might choose your spouse based on their social status, career, living area, etc. This doesn’t imply that you’ll be compatible, which is essential for a relationship or marriage to last. 

 

Lack of Respect

It’s completely common to have ups and downs in your marriage. However, if you face difficult moments with a lack of respect, you can’t expect a fulfilling marriage. Respect is the foundation of every relationship we build with other people. If you or your partner is disrespectful, this can lead to isolation and seeking respect somewhere else. 

 

How Can Infidelity Counseling Help?

Your first instinct will likely be to leave your partner if you have been cheated on. It’s not about it being the wrong or right decision; it’s about understanding and feeling what happened before making a move. If you have been hurt, you have the right to feel that pain in a safe environment and not carry it around with you. 

Also, there is a chance that there’s still so much love you both feel for each other that you’re willing to fight for your relationship or marriage. Instead of ignoring what happened, you are both making a courageous decision to look into the causes of infidelity to prevent it from happening again. 

You will both be given a safe space to talk, share thoughts, and express emotions you feel. Such counseling starts by talking about infidelity, yet its ultimate goal is to repair the damage it created so you both can understand each other better and give each other what you need. By taking care of each other, you are becoming more intimate, and therefore, your needs are met within your marriage or relationship and not outside it. 

 

How Infidelity Counseling Works 

You might be nervous when coming to your first session because you don’t know what to expect. Maybe you think you’ll say something out of control. You could feel worried that the session will not be constructive at all. Whatever your worries are, keep in mind that that’s what counseling is for. It is a space to share, discuss, seek advice, and feel whatever you are experiencing at the moment. 

Once you walk into your first session, your therapist will ask you a few questions to have a better understanding of what happened and the reason you’re both here. They will give you both time to talk and to highlight your concerns, questions, or any other doubts you might have about the process. 

Keep in mind that if you’re not willing to talk to your partner and do the work together, it will be impossible to progress. Your counselor is there to provide support and to guide you through the healing process, yet you and your partner’s collaboration is crucial for it to work. 

 

Final Words

If you’re unsure about the effectiveness of infidelity counseling, consider giving it a try. If you are curious about it because there is a hope of saving your marriage, try it. Invest a few months in an effort to clarify the circumstances and provide your partner with the chance to articulate the factors that contributed to their infidelity. 

If it doesn’t work, at least you’ll know you did all you could to save the relationship you built. Besides, counseling can also teach you more things about yourself. For instance, you can learn what you actually look for in a relationship, what your needs are, and which boundaries you want your partner to respect. All of that can help you either to strengthen your marriage or to build a healthier romantic relationship with another person when the time is right. 

 

Couples Communication Strategies

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

 

Babygirl Full Movie

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Sex Therapist Reviews Babygirl Full Movie and Discusses All the Subtle Hints!

 

The Babygirl full movie is one of the best I’ve seen in a long time. Halina Rejin explores dual relationships and non-monogamy with authenticity and depth. The story is told from the perspective of a woman executive navigating the integration of her many parts, offering a refreshing and emotionally engaging narrative.

The film delves into themes of self-discovery, workplace dynamics, kink, and power struggles. Rejin skillfully balances vulnerability and strength, highlighting how intimacy intersects with ambition and control. Each scene feels intentional, offering viewers moments of both discomfort and revelation.

With bold storytelling and nuanced eroticism, Babygirl explores desire, identity, and relationships in ways few films dare to. The characters are multifaceted, each one bringing the intricacies of human connection to life. The movie doesn’t shy away from addressing taboo topics, challenging viewers to question societal norms around sexuality, power, and the roles we play in relationships.

As a sex therapist, I appreciate the film’s sensitivity in examining how past experiences, insecurities, and evolving needs shape our intimate lives. The portrayal of non-monogamy feels realistic and avoids sensationalism, showing both the challenges and rewards of exploring less conventional paths.

Babygirl also shines in its depiction of how different aspects of identity—personal, professional, and sexual—can coexist. It invites viewers to consider how they integrate these parts of themselves, especially in moments of vulnerability and growth.

This movie serves as both a form of entertainment and a deep reflection on love, power, and connection. It’s a rare gem that sparks meaningful conversations long after the credits roll. Whether you’re curious about non-monogamy or simply enjoy complex storytelling, Babygirl is a must-watch.

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Intimacy Coordinator

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Intimacy Coordinator + Being a Safety Net for Actors 

 

An intimacy coordinator is a person who ensures a safe, respectful, and consensual environment during intimate scenes in film, theater, television, or other art or production forms. Their goal is to provide valuable insight when choreographing scenes that involve physical intimacy, nudity, or stimulated sexual acts with a focus on the well-being of the actors and crew. 

For the past hundred years, the entertainment industry has been producing and promoting countless movies and series, which often involve these types of scenes. Not until recently have actors been able to trust someone to look out for them in vulnerable moments. 

This article will explain why intimacy coordinators are vital to actors’ well-being and the industry’s future. Find out the key responsibilities of intimacy coordinators and how to become one if you’re interested. 

 

Definition of an Intimacy Coordinator

For the past few years, you might have heard actors and producers talking about the importance of intimacy coordinators. They are present during shooting moments that involve nudity, physical intimacy, or simulated sexual acts to ensure that nobody is pushed beyond their own wellbeing. 

For instance, it’s a known fact that many movies in history have included two actors completely nude, showing expressions of physical intimacy without care for their mental health. The art was above everything, even the well-being of the actors and the crew. I have heard people in the industry say things like “you must suffer for your art.”

That is why the role of intimacy coordinator is so essential in today’s movies and series. A recent example can be found in the ‘Firefly Lane’ TV series. The lead actress, Katherine Heigl, shared how grateful she feels that all scenes were recorded with the presence of an intimacy coordinator. Similarly, in the Babygirl Movie, the director and main actress reported that the presence of an professional was beneficial. 

Without an  coordinator, these young girls would have to fight for themselves, hoping the director and others saw their best interests, which was often not the case. 

 

Key Responsibilities of an Intimacy Coordinator

To ensure that all parties involved are secured from any harm, an intimacy coordinator has several responsibilities. One of the most important ones is facilitating communication between actors and the crew. Intimacy coordinators are like liaisons between the two sides of this industry. Before filming or rehearsing, they discuss each scene’s nature and boundaries. 

Besides communication, intimacy coordinators establish consent and boundaries by working with actors to define their personal comfort levels and boundaries. With the presence of these professionals, actors will not feel pressure to perform beyond what was previously agreed upon. 

Another key responsibility is choreographing intimate scenes. To ensure story continuity and professionalism, an intimacy coordinator plans and blocks physical interactions. Akin to a stunt or dance routine, they structure and repeat intimacy.

Most importantly, intimacy coordinators make actors, crew, and anyone else who wants to enter this exciting world feel safe. For example, if you dream of an acting career yet are afraid that your beliefs, boundaries, and comfort will be questioned, an intimacy coordinator is your safety net. 

Lastly, these professionals also ensure legal and ethical compliance. They do so by ensuring that productions comply with union guidelines and legal standards regarding nudity and simulated acts. They can also implement modesty garments, barriers, or other protective measures when sensual scenes happen.

 

How to Become an Intimacy Coordinator

SAG-AFTRA-accredited professional certificates in intimacy coordinating can be obtained through different venues. To be included in the union’s intimacy coordinator register, you must combine relevant training and job experience. 

Aspiring intimacy coordinators are advised by SAG to show intent, develop their skill set, and network to obtain employment experience. To demonstrate interest in this emerging sector, future intimacy coordinators should participate in industry conversations. Another great idea is to join relevant organizations, attend networking events, build company relationships, find mentors, and look for assistance or shadowing.

To be an intimacy coordinator in the United States, a person will need to meet a few requirements, including:

  • Pass a state and federal background check
  • Obtain intimacy coordinator certification from a SAG-AFTRA-approved training program
  • Continue educating yourself about sexual storytelling, communication, consent, gender, sexual diversity, sensitivity, movement coaching, masking, and power dynamics 
  • Gain knowledge about union contracts that discuss simulated sex
  • Seek mentorship opportunities from an established intimacy coordinator

Also, many professionals have previously worked as sex and relationship coaches. This allowed them to have relevant experience working with couples and individuals and learning different methods to establish boundaries and build mutual respect. Such knowledge is extremely beneficial for intimacy coordinators. 

 

Conclusion

It’s not a surprise that everyone, including sex therapists, is celebrating this rising trend in the entertainment industry. Intimacy coordinators establish a professional atmosphere that discourages exploitation or inappropriate behavior, contributing to improving the conditions of the industry. Because of intimacy coordinators, awareness of the need for workplace safety and consent is growing as well. Actors and crew members have been vocal about their need for an independent professional who can protect their boundaries in a healthy and sustainable way. 

With the right training and education, intimacy coordinators can protect everyone involved in rehearsing and producing vulnerable scenes. By standing up for each person in this industry, intimacy coordinators are ensuring that the work environment of these people is not as harmful as it was before. Just like it is with any other profession, workers have every right to have their boundaries respected and not be traumatized during their work hours. 

If you want to learn more about making an appointment with one of our celebrity therapists, book here.

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Trauma Release Exercises

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Trauma Release Exercises You Can Do From Home

 

Whether or not you’re already seeing a therapist, there are certain trauma release exercises you can do from the comfort of your home. It can be a great addition to your therapy, or you can use it whenever you want to release tension or unwind from a stressful day.

Although we’re all mostly used to busy, dynamic lifestyles, our bodies need time to relax and release all the tension they have accumulated throughout time. Giving yourself some time to do so can help you become more present in your life, understand better what you care about, and how to ensure you protect yourself from stressful situations.

 

What are Trauma Release Exercises?

Trauma-release movements aim to relieve deep muscle patterns of chronic stress, muscle tension, and trauma-related physical discomfort. These exercises can be quite beneficial in helping to release any stored stress and trauma, as they activate the body’s natural tremoring mechanism. Trauma-release exercises can be a wonderful way for your body to let go of tension that has been held for a long time, helping you to find a sense of balance again. 

Anyone experiencing stress, anxiety, or witnessed discomfort while alone and without support can consider trauma-release exercises. It benefits those who have tightness, discomfort, or inflammation in their bodies. Trauma-release exercises can benefit those with family, housing, financial, or health issues. Such exercises can help anyone whose health and well-being are being jeopardized by stress, overload, worry, or pain.

 

Examples of Trauma Release Exercises

There are several different types of TREs that can help people let go of unresolved trauma. As you experiment with them, you may discover that some have a greater influence on you than others. You may consult a mental health practitioner to decide which trauma release exercises would benefit you best if you’re uncertain or you feel like they can maybe trigger you into reliving your trauma again. 

 

Stretching 

Stretching is one of the most popular TREs since it helps release tense muscles. The modified TRE, or standing forward fold with shaking, promotes relaxation and helps the release of tension held in the muscles. Keep in mind to pay attention to your body and modify the level of intensity as necessary.

The way to do it is to stand with your feet hip-width apart while also relaxing your knees. When you feel comfortable, start slowly bending forward at the hips and feel your upper body becoming more relaxed as you go. After you’ve done a few movements, start gently shaking your body. You can do a sway from one side to another or from the lower part of your body to your head. 

Yet if you can, while you’re gently shaking your body, don’t force or jerk any movements and allow your body to release tension. During shaking, think of an animal after a bath, and focus on taking slow, deep breaths, as it also helps release tension or stress stored in the body. 

Once you feel like you’re done, slowly stop with the shaking. Bring attention to the rest of your body and notice how your body feels after this exercise. You may feel warmer, sillier, or back to a primal state like a dog. 

 

The Spiral Technique

This is one of the trauma-release exercises you can do on your own or with your therapist. It requires you to close your eyes, see your body, and recall the unpleasant experience or trauma. During this process, monitor your body’s response, particularly your heartbeat and stomach.

Think of that part of your body as a spiral, and observe how quickly or slowly it turns. Push the spiral in the other direction with your thoughts. This may be a difficult task if you’re practicing it for the first time, yet it will become more natural with time. 

As you do the spiral technique, be mindful of your breathing. When you’re ready, return your focus to your surroundings and pay attention to your physical sensations. Keep your eyes open, pay attention to your breathing, and hold onto any safety or calm you have experienced during the exercise.

 

Wall Sitting Stretch for Upper Legs

If you are noticing some tension in your upper legs, it could be helpful to explore this technique. Lie flat on your back. Bend your knees, making sure your feet are right underneath you, and bring them together. Bring your heels as close as you can to your body and spread your knees. During this exercise, it’s important to keep your foot soles together. 

Once you feel ready, raise your hips off the ground and keep them in the air for 30 to 60 seconds, depending on what feels comfortable to you. Then, lower the hips to the ground and press the body against your heels. Use this time to recover and breathe. When you feel ready to repeat this exercise, bring your knees a bit closer and lift your hips. Repeat this as many times as necessary, until the knees are joined together. 

You don’t have to do the entire exercise at once; you can take as many pauses as you need or slowly extend the exercise by one movement each time you perform it. 

 

Benefits of Trauma Release Exercises 

The majority of people report both physical and mental benefits from trauma-release exercises, which can assist with PTSD, anxiety, and other chronic problems. Additionally, even those with physical restrictions or impairments can safely do TRE stretches at home. To prevent hurting oneself or making preexisting issues worse, make sure you modify stretches to suit your requirements. Each body is different, so it’s best to listen to it for instructions instead of forcing something that might not work for you. 

Trauma work means taking care of your bodily, mental, and emotional needs. To help with your healing process, take good care of yourself before, during, and after trauma release activities. Keep yourself active, eat a healthy diet, and get enough sleep to meet your other fundamental needs.

 

Conclusion

Trauma-release exercises are a recommended method for removing stress from your body at home. However, don’t hurry it and start slow! When exercising, pay attention to how your body feels instead of pushing yourself to the point of great discomfort. 

Keep in mind to breathe deeply and to let your body move freely. If you have trouble practicing independently or have mobility limitations, think about locating a certified TRE practitioner or talk to your therapist about it. 

 

Quick Ways to Reduce Anxiety and Stress

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Does Age Matter in a Relationship When The Woman is Older?

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Does Age Matter in a Relationship When The Woman is Older?

 

Does age really matter in a relationship when the woman is older? Is it just a number when it comes to love?

In this video, licensed therapist Amanda Pasciucco dives deep into why age gaps in relationships may not be as big of an issue as you think—especially when both partners are over 25!

From the rise of “Cougar & Cub” relationships to the fact that emotional connection, compatibility, and shared values matter far more than the years between two people, Amanda explores why these relationships can thrive. She discusses how maturity, life experience, and mutual respect can often outweigh age differences, providing a richer understanding of love and partnership.

 

 

Couples Communication Strategies

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexibile, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

How to Be a Better Listener

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How to Be a Better Listener: Tips and Techniques To Use

 

Learning to be a better listener will benefit you in every aspect of your life. Actively listening to people allows you to get to know them better, understand their point of view, and become closer to them. Although we are all aware of the importance of quality communication, the emphasis is often on talking rather than listening. 

However, communication cannot exist without listening. If one person talks, the other one has to listen. No matter how clearly someone is stating something, if another person is not paying attention, the communication will not be successful. Instead of providing you with useful tips and ideas on how to be better at communicating what you want, we’ve decided to focus on helping you become a better listener. 

 

Why Does Listening Matter?

Even for a little interaction between two human beings, you need someone to talk to and someone to listen. We’re exchanging information with other people constantly, whether it’s at work, at home, or while we’re on public transportation. That said, each interaction or communication we share with another person or group of people can only be efficient if somebody is listening to us. You may feel let down if your boss does not listen to you when you walk into their office after spending the entire night planning the best way to request a raise. 

You can easily find online courses and schools that help people become better at public speaking. And you probably already know certain people who excel in communication. However, we rarely seek out listening strategies or learn how to listen better. Somehow, society has pushed listening aside, and people have focused on sharpening their communication skills while completely ignoring the importance of being a good listener

Except for certain situations, most communication opportunities will require a certain amount of talking and a certain amount of listening. Being good at talking alone does not translate into effective communication. Meaning, brilliant communicators understand that talking and listening are complementary aspects of communication. 

Lastly, when you listen to someone, you show respect. It’s impossible to respect someone without caring about what they have to say, how they feel, and what they need. 

 

What Happens When You Don’t Listen

If you care about any aspect of your life, it might be your marriage or your career; becoming even better at it requires understanding what is necessary to move forward. Meaning, ignoring your spouse’s needs during a difficult time in your marriage could result in divorce. If you want a promotion by the end of next year, failing to listen to your superior’s requirements could cost you that opportunity or even get you fired.

When we were children, we listened to other people in order to stay safe. Now, when we’re adults, we should listen to connect. This connection isn’t necessarily a form of intimacy. It can also lead to fulfilling your professional goals, meeting new people in a new city, or learning about a different culture when traveling. 

 

How to Listen Better

Before we get into tactics and tips for becoming a better listener, it’s important to distinguish active from passive listening. Passive listening is a type of listening in which you are quiet, yet you are not fully concentrated on what the person is saying. A perfect example of passive listening would be a child during a subject they are not passionate about. 

Active listening, on the other hand, requires your focus. You are paying attention to what the person is talking about, you feel interested in the subject of the conversation, and you want a positive outcome of such a conversation. Active listening is required for overcoming a crisis in a relationship or during a performance review, especially if you’re interested in improving your results. 

If you want to become a better listener, keep reading our recommended techniques.

 

1.Set Intention to Listen

It might sound weird at first; however, those who are not naturally good listeners will need to practice it, just like they would with any other skill. So, if you’ve decided to become a better listener, you should start by setting the intention to listen more and speak less in a certain situation of your interest.

For instance, if you want to show support to your spouse who is going through a stressful period at work, you will want to initiate the conversation after you’ve set the intention to listen. Choosing to pay attention allows you to feel more curious about the conversation itself instead of feeling like you’re trapped until the person stops talking. This will also help you become more aware of the moments when you feel ready for such a conversation and those when it would be best to be alone and take care of yourself first.

 

2.Ask Questions

Listening doesn’t have to be a passive activity in which you struggle to stay concentrated. If your mind wanders off or you feel like you need additional clarification, ask a question. For instance, if you’re new at your job and the onboarding specialist is giving too many instructions, instead of feeling overwhelmed with information, ask a question. 

Ask them to repeat something they’ve said or ask about something you’re interested in. This will allow you to change the dynamic of the conversation, take a breath, and feel like you have more control over the situation. 

 

3.Pay Attention to Nonverbal Communication

We are always communicating, even in a room with people who are all sitting quietly. Nonverbal communication is often more impactful than verbal communication. If you’re listening to your colleague talking in a long business meeting, what would your nonverbal communication say? Are you bored? Are you impatient to jump in and start talking? 

Nonverbal communication matters equally when you’re speaking and listening. That is why it’s crucial that you remind yourself that your posture, eye contact, and every little move you make show how you feel about the situation you’re in. Avoid playing with your fingers, looking away through the window, and sitting with your arms crossed across your chess, as they are all cues of lack of interest or disagreement. 

Luckily, if you’re truly interested in becoming a better listener, you can do so with practice. Give yourself some time to implement these tips, and whenever you find yourself in a listening mode, use it as an opportunity to improve your listening skills. 

 

Communication And Love Language Strategies

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