self-sabotaging behaviors

Breaking Free from Self-Sabotaging Behaviors: Overcome Patterns for Personal Growth

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Breaking Free from Self-Sabotaging Behaviors: Overcome Patterns for Personal Growth

 

Self-sabotaging behaviors are those that cause problems in everyday life and impede long-term goals. For example, procrastination, self-medication with drugs or alcohol, binge or restrictive eating, and self-injury are among the most common self-destructive activities.

Connecting a behavior to self-defeating consequences does not guarantee that the person will stop doing it. People are not always aware that they are causing themselves harm. However, almost all forms of self-sabotage can be defeated. Behavioral therapy can assist in breaking up ingrained thought and behavior patterns while also improving reflection and self-control. Similarly, motivational therapy can help a person reconnect with their goals and values.

 

Why Do Some Self-Sabotage?

There are various reasons why someone could behave in a way that is harmful to their own well-being. Of course, some people struggle for the majority of their lives with intense cravings for food, alcohol, gambling, or other temptations that have a severe impact on their relationships or health.

The factors that cause self-sabotage, however, can also be subtle and not so obvious to everyone else. For instance, a buildup of erroneous and dysfunctional ideas might cause someone to underrate their skills, repress their emotions, or snap at others around them.

People may block their own progress for a variety of reasons. Procrastination, perfectionism, relationships, jobs, finances, time, and change are common forms of self-sabotage. For instance, a perfectionist who strives to do work precisely may discount incremental advancements when even a small amount of development might help them reach their objective.

 

Causes of Self-Sabotage 

For a number of reasons, people prevent their own advancement. They may deliberately or subconsciously engage in self-destructive behavior. The root causes might be traced back to early relationships or childhood difficulties. Low self-esteem, coping issues, and issues with cognitive dissonance are some other causes of this sort of harmful conduct, which will be detailed below.

People frequently employ self-sabotage as a coping strategy to deal with difficult events and painful memories. Unfortunately, it frequently worsens issues and restricts one’s capacity to move forward in a healthy manner.

Self-sabotaging individuals may be conscious of their behavior. For instance, a dieter who is overweight could purposefully undermine their efforts by devouring the entire carton of ice cream.

Or they could behave unintentionally. A person misses a deadline at work. It appears like he was late at first glance, yet in reality, he is terrified of failing. By missing the deadline, he undermines his efforts to advance within the organization.

These are the most common causes of self-sabotaging behaviors:

  • Difficult childhood,
  • Problems in your romantic relationships,
  • Low self-esteem,
  • Cognitive dissonance

 

Types of Self-Sabotaging Behaviors

Mental health professionals have recognized typical instances of self-sabotage. Procrastination, perfectionism, and self-medication are three simple examples. However, you will be able to find more of them, depending on the person and their previous life experiences. 

 

Procrastination

Those who self-sabotage delay gratification frequently. Procrastination is a strategy to demonstrate to others that you are never prepared and delay a positive result. People are afraid of disappointing others, failing, or excelling, which is why.

 

Perfectionism

It will take longer and lead to setbacks if you hold yourself to an unattainable standard. Aiming for everything to go off without a hitch may sound like a good idea, yet perfectionism stifles achievement. Perfectionists fall apart when something goes wrong, as it will invariably occur. They experience humiliation as a result. They are prone to sadness and believe that they have let everyone down.

 

Self Medication

Many people turn to drugs, alcohol, and self-injury to cope with the ongoing conflict between their desire to succeed and the voice in their heads telling them they can’t.

 

Preventing Self-Sabotage

An essential part of avoiding self-sabotage is tracking and evaluating behavior. People prone to self-defeating habits might become aware of when they are stressed and record the cause of that stress as well as their reactions. They may examine if that decision is based on any false or harmful ideas, and if so, train themselves to react in a different, healthier way by, for example, talking to others about their feelings, working out, or picking up a new interest.

Your best course of action is to seek assistance from your therapist or counselor, if you are working with one. Here are some things to think about to stop you from doing further harm if you want some advice on how to stop this bad conduct.

Look for patterns in your life to understand what might cause a certain behavior. Have you a tendency to consistently undermine your own good intentions? Did these deeds take place while you were about to succeed or on the verge of fulfilling your own goals?

As previously stated, this behavior might have developmental origins. Some parents encourage their children not to think too big, either because they don’t know any better or because they are concerned their kids won’t be happy.

 

In Final Words

People who self-sabotage frequently strive for perfection. Perhaps you obsess over minor details and expect everything to be flawless. Instead of aiming for perfection, strive for excellence. Begin to make small adjustments and track your progress as you get closer to your goal.

Professional therapy can help you understand and unlearn self-sabotaging behaviors. After all, self-sabotaging behavior doesn’t just appear and disappear. It took many actions and experiences, especially with your parents and family, to cultivate it, so it will take time to replace it with rewarding, healthy behaviors. 

If you know someone who self-sabotages, forward them this blog.   

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About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

Transform Your Well-being with a Trusted Holistic Therapist Near Me

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Transform Your Well-being with a Trusted Holistic Therapist Near Me

 

If you’ve stumbled upon this article after searching for a Holistic Therapist Near Me, you’re in the right place. It is crucial to understand what holistic therapy implies before starting to see a counselor who practices it. 

Holistic therapy addresses your mind, body, and spirit as a whole. Because these aspects of ourselves are treated individually in traditional therapy, you will learn a systemic approach with holistic support. You might assume that specific components of who we are are to blame for our issues, yet our problems rarely apply to just one aspect of who we are. Even when we cannot identify a deeper relationship immediately, the solution is often connected to ourselves entirely, not just a part of us.

To help people deal with these issues and recover more thoroughly, holistic therapists assist in looking at those deeper connections. Unlike traditional therapists, holistic therapists will focus on the mind, body, heart, and spirit as components of a larger whole to ensure success. 

What Is Holistic Therapy?

Holistic therapy is a type of therapy that uses methods not commonly seen in conventional, mainstream care to treat a variety of mental and emotional illnesses. Meaning, it emphasizes treating and improving all aspects of a person’s life rather than focusing on one health issue.

An integrated approach combines traditional and complementary therapies, such as psychotherapy, medicine, acupuncture, and yoga. Also, holistic therapy combines an evidence-based approach with a comprehensive framework and is frequently customized to meet the particular requirements of the person. The majority of holistic treatments are used in both private and public settings.

How Does Holistic Therapy Work?

Holistic therapy functions best when a professional and the patient receiving treatment cooperate. Together, they create a unique therapeutic strategy that incorporates both conventional and non-conventional therapies, such as holistic therapy. When feasible, the holistic approach will emphasize prevention, use scientific methods, and tap into the body’s innate ability to heal itself.

In general, the purpose of holistic treatment is to aid in a person’s growth in self-awareness, self-esteem, and self-confidence. Holistic psychotherapy addresses body and soul issues as well as life events, stressors, memories, and thought patterns.

Your therapist will help you create a unique therapy that incorporates traditional and alternative methods. Furthermore, this approach will prioritize prevention, use cutting-edge scientific techniques, and draw upon the body’s natural capacity to heal itself where practical.

Which Issues Can Be Treated with Holistic Therapy?

Holistic treatment can be beneficial for a variety of mental health issues, such as:

  • Anxiety
  • Depression
  • PTSD
  • Managing stress 
  • Existential crisis

It can also help psychologically-caused physiological symptoms like muscle tension or digestive issues. You don’t need mental health symptoms to see a holistic therapist. Holistic therapy may help you discover who you are and how to balance your health.

Although holistic psychotherapy is a good option for everyone, you should treat the procedure seriously. As a culture, we frequently fail to care for our bodies and souls. As a result, some of us struggle to accept both our physical and spiritual selves. We learn to act in this manner at times, and at others, fear or trauma causes us to overlook these aspects of ourselves. Whatever the reason, be willing to accept this healing method and develop a close relationship with yourself.

Your therapist may use holistic psychotherapy to assist clients in making long-term changes. Although some people visit therapists on a regular basis as part of their self-care routines, the goal is for you to leave therapy feeling connected, healed, and confident. 

What to Expect from Holistic Therapy?

The use of holistic treatments is known to involve a number of processes. The integration of knowledge of psychological and physiological systems is frequently emphasized in holistic treatment. Energy work, which focuses on removing imbalances and obstructions in the body’s natural energy flow, is sometimes used as the foundation of holistic treatments. As an example, reiki is the best-known example of energy work in holistic healing.

How long do you expect sessions to last? Well, the number of sessions might vary significantly. While some treatments take place on a weekly basis, others do so more or less frequently. Furthermore, the combination of many holistic treatments is available. 

The first part of a therapy appointment is frequently a check-in regarding your mental and physical well-being. This initial stage sets up long-term care to assess your progress and discuss treatment. 

The goal of holistic therapy is not predetermined. You and your therapist will decide on treatment objectives early on in the therapeutic process, just as in any talk therapy. 

 

Final Thoughts

No matter what form of holistic treatment you select, be careful to engage with a practitioner with considerable training in applying their approaches to address the problems you wish to solve. Also note that psychotherapists are not usually required to be holistic therapists.

Check in with those you are going to work with! Many practitioners of holistic therapies hold certificates and licenses that allow them to provide particular treatments, such as Reiki, yoga, or clinical therapy.

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.

Trauma Treatment: Best Types of Therapy

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Trauma Treatment: Best Types of Therapy

 

One type of treatment that can assist you in coping with your emotions to a traumatic incident is trauma therapy. Trauma treatment can result from numerous events, including a pandemic, ongoing abuse and neglect, bullying, and / or violence.

You may benefit from this type of therapy if you are struggling to deal with your trauma or if it is interfering with your ability to carry out daily tasks. Let’s take a look at what trauma is to better understand our options when we decide to look for help in dealing with trauma treatment..

What is Trauma?

The body and psyche can be deeply affected by traumatic events. Your emotions, relationships, and even your sense of self may be affected right away or years later by the impact. However, some solutions can help you recover from trauma.

Trauma can alter your nervous system and brain, resulting in dysregulation and symptoms like anxiety and sadness. Trauma therapies are therefore concerned with calming the nervous system, integrating painful experiences, and promoting mental and physical healing.

The “best” trauma treatment is the one that works for you; there is no one-size-fits-all approach. While it can take some time to find the correct therapy, the variety of options will help you find what works! 

What is Trauma Treatment?

Trauma treatment or trauma-focused therapy is an approach that identifies and focuses on the influence that the traumatic event has on a child’s mental, behavioral, emotional, and physical health. Understanding the link between the traumatic event and the child’s emotional and behavioral responses is the foundation of trauma therapy. The goal of this therapy is to help the child better comprehend, cope with, and process the feelings and memories associated with traumatic situations. 

This will ultimately allow them to make a healthier and more adaptive meaning of the experience that occurred in their life, however, trauma therapy is not only for children. Oftentimes, we will continue with our lives after we experience a traumatic event and will decide to seek therapy in our adulthood. Many people might begin their trauma treatment in their 20s, 30s, 40s, or even 50s, meaning that each trauma treatment path will be unique. 

What are the Benefits of Trauma Treatment? 

Adults and teens who have been through a traumatic situation may benefit from trauma-focused therapy. It will help you gain a deeper understanding, learn how to address the issues, and build healthier coping mechanisms. 

Below, you can find a few benefits of trauma treatment:

  • Learning about and understanding your trauma
  • Re-establishing safety in your life
  • Identifying triggers that are interfering with your daily activities
  • Developing healthy coping skills
  • Reducing traumatic-stress symptoms

Types of Trauma Treatments 

Several different therapies can be used to treat trauma. If you’re looking to learn how to overcome trauma-related issues and treat post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), these are the approaches you should consider:

1. Cognitive Processing Therapy

Patricia Resick, Ph.D., ABPP, created cognitive processing therapy (CPT) as a treatment for PTSD. Its objective is to help those who cannot overcome their memories of the tragedy.

In cognitive processing therapy, you will learn to confront and alter false ideas about the trauma that are not allowing you to move on. The goal is to relieve the unpleasant impacts by assisting you in understanding and changing the way you perceive the incident or events.

 

2. Prolonged Exposure Therapy

Prolonged exposure (PE) is a behavioral therapy for PTSD that, as the name implies, entails going face-to-face with the thing you’re afraid of to lessen your anxiety. One common sign of post-traumatic stress is avoidance. The goal of PE therapy is to assist you in overcoming avoidance that resulted from your trauma.

You will learn to regulate your breathing, discuss your trauma, and subtly face your fear of the outside world while in treatment. For instance, a victim of sexual assault can return to the scene of the assault to acknowledge that the traumatic event has passed and they are safe.

 

3. Trauma-focused CBT

Trauma-focused CBT (TF-CBT) is primarily used to treat trauma in children and adolescents. The purpose of TF-CBT is to assist kids in identifying erroneous beliefs (such as who is to blame for abuse), correcting unhealthy behavior patterns, and developing new coping mechanisms like self-soothing and emotional expression. 

Parents or other carers are also involved in this therapy approach. A trauma treatment like TF-CBT could successfully lessen the symptoms of PTSD in certain kids, and the APA highly advises using CBT to treat PTSD.

 

4. EMDR Therapy

Dr. Francine Shapiro, a psychologist, created the trauma therapy known as Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) in 1987. The therapy is distinctive in that it focuses on using your eye movements to process and release painful memories rather than talking.

In an EMDR session, your therapist will ask you to concentrate on your hand moving back and forth while holding a particular detail of a traumatic incident in your mind (or, sometimes, rhythmic tapping).

How Trauma Treatment Works

Most therapists will utilize more than one modality to address the traumas of their patients. And they frequently use techniques based on what works for you.

The clients’ belief system and level of readiness for such interventions play a significant role in the success of therapy interventions. It could be counterproductive to insist on a specific technique if a client is resistant or wary of an approach.

Additionally, it’s critical to keep in mind that your relationship with your therapist plays a significant role in treatment. It will be challenging to achieve some results if you don’t trust your therapist.

In Final Words

If you’ve experienced trauma, it’s common to not know what to do next. Additionally, you can experience flashbacks, nausea, migraines, and erratic emotions that medical doctors cannot help. 

Trauma therapy can be helpful if you struggle to manage your symptoms or if they make it difficult for you to go about your daily activities.

Trauma therapy can assist you in processing the trauma and learning coping mechanisms to have a fulfilling life.

 

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About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Trauma focused therapy

Trauma Focused Therapy: What Is It & How It Works

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Trauma Focused Therapy: What Is It & How It Works

 

Trauma focused therapy provides adults, youth, teens, and everyone else with a safe, confidential place to talk about their personal experiences, problems, feelings, or thoughts. As we’re seeing more patients seeking this type of therapy. We’ve decided to help our interns specialize in trauma focused therapy and provide our clients with what they need.

People who go to trauma focused therapy have usually experienced a situation that affected their thinking, feelings, mood. Or the ability to connect with others and are looking for a safe place to talk about it with someone who will understand and guide them. As trauma focused therapists, we are dedicated to providing you with all the support and guidance you need in recovering from the trauma that occurred and feeling fulfilled and happy again.

What is Trauma Focused Therapy?

This is a specific approach to therapy in which therapists are focused on understanding how a traumatic experience can impact a person’s mental, behavioral, emotional, and physical health. It is based on a deeper understanding of the connection between the traumatic experience and how a person is reacting to it. Both emotionally and behaviorally. 

The objective of trauma focused therapy is to provide skills and strategies to help the person better understand what happened and how to cope with the consequences of the event, from emotions to memories. While working with our trauma focused interns. You will learn how to create a healthier and more adaptive meaning of the experienced that occurred to you. Considering that traumatic events are more complex than we assume, having professional guidance helps us recover quicker and more efficiently. While also learning more about ourselves and how we react to other situations in our lives. 

Reasons to Start Trauma Focused Therapy

If you or someone you know has experienced a traumatic event and is not certain whether trauma focused therapy is the right choice. Learn all the benefits of this specific approach to therapy. 

The first reason why someone should consider trauma focused therapy is that it truly helps understand the trauma on a deeper level. The person can learn about the connection between the traumatic event and the emotional and behavioral responses which help them gain more control over their life. Not understanding why you feel a certain way or thoughts that appear can cause even more confusion and frustration for someone who is trying to recover from a certain trauma. 

Also, trauma focused therapy helps the person re-establish safety. When guided through their experience, a person can learn the needed tools that will help them get their life back on track. As many of our clients who’ve experienced a traumatic event struggle to go back to their life before the event occurred. We’re focused on helping them heal from it to ensure they are able to live their lives as they want.

Trauma is followed by triggers, and not knowing what is causing you to feel sad, scared, angry, alone, or frustrated might lead to reliving your traumatic experience over and over again. By participating in trauma focused therapy, a person will learn to identify, understand. And verbalize their memories and feeling linked to the trauma. Especially with young people and teens, their reactions might seem sudden and not being able to help them understand their reactions prevents them from healing. 

Besides recovering from a trauma, therapy helps us develop healthy coping skills that will be valuable in many situations in our lives. This also allows the person to build a healthier life, relationships with others, and self-esteem. After all, the more satisfied you are with your life, the easier it is to leave your trauma in the past and look forward to what the future holds. 

Trauma Focused Therapy Activities

In trauma focused therapy, therapists can use a variety of activities and strategies that indicate a quick and efficient recovery. These activities or strategies will differ from client to client and are mostly based on their age, trauma experience, location, or setting. In other words, a teenager who has lost a parent recently will participate in different therapy activities from a war vet struggling with PTSD. 

Our trauma focused interns may use different creative activities and strategies while addressing your memories, emotions. Or problematic behaviors linked to traumatic experiences as part of the therapy. These activities are conducted sensitively and uniquely for each person seeking trauma focused therapy.

Trauma Focused Therapy vs Other Therapy Approaches

Luckily, therapy has been evolving over the past few decades and we’re seeing more approaches being practiced in the United States. However, when trying to differentiate one approach from another, it might be quite confusing for someone who is simply looking to start therapy and is not sure in which direction to go.

As its name indicates, trauma focused therapy is focused on helping individuals recover from a certain traumatic event or a series of traumatic events that occurred in their lives. Trauma focused therapists are not focused on areas unaffected by the trauma. For instance, a person who has been violently robbed in a foreign country will not treat their eating disorder in a trauma focused therapy unless the eating disorder began after the traumatic event.

When starting general therapy, you will talk about any topic you want with your therapist. Unlike general therapists, trauma focused ones are educated and skilled to help you heal from a trauma that happened and is preventing you to live your life like you used to. A trauma focused therapist has a specialty in trauma and emotional and behavioral responses a person might experience after the event. 

Seeking Help

Whether it’s you or someone close to you, seeking help is the first step to recovering from a traumatic experience. We’re often convinced that not thinking about something makes it go away, yet it’s completely the opposite. Our trauma focused interns can help you heal from the trauma. While also helping you enjoy your life as you used to. 

The space you will come into is completely safe, neutral, and comfortable. You will feel encouraged to talk about your feelings, thoughts. And behaviors that appeared due to this event as much as you want to. Don’t forget, you should have control over your trauma and not your trauma over you!

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About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT). And an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Trauma Therapy Near Me

Trauma Therapy Near Me: How To Find The Best PTSD Therapist?

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Trauma Therapy Near Me: How To Find The Best PTSD Therapist?

 

If you have post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), you are probably thinking about searching for the ‘trauma therapy near me’ term on Google. Because dealing with any type of trauma is unpleasant and painful, it’s a good idea to look into therapists in your area to feel a bit more comfortable about seeking professional help. 

If the process of searching for a good PTSD therapist is frustrating for you, luckily, just searching for those near will reduce the number of results and offer you a list of numbers and emails where you could schedule the appointment. Other factors you will need to keep in mind are the therapy costs, insurance, treatment orientation, and the way you feel about the therapist and the work they do. 

PTSD Therapy

Post-traumatic stress disorder therapy will involve a range of treatments for PTSD that aim to relieve the symptoms and provide people with the tools that enhance the way they manage their symptoms. Along with the medications, your therapist may use different types of psychotherapy such as:

  • Cognitive processing therapy,
  • Eye movement desensitization,
  • Reprocessing therapy (EMDR),
  • Cognitive behavior therapy (CBT).

If you know or suspect you have PTSD, you should consider finding a mental health professional to decide which treatment type can be most effective for you. It’s important to keep in mind that if your first therapist doesn’t seem like the right fit, you can easily stop seeing them and find the one that will work better. 

PTSD Symptoms

Typically, the PTSD symptoms will appear within one month of the traumatic event, yet sometimes the symptoms appear after several years. PTSD symptoms cause numerous problems in social or professional situations, especially in relationships and marriages. They can also affect how you deal with your regular daily tasks. 

All PTSD symptoms are gathered into four categories: 

  • Intrusive memories,
  • Avoidance,
  • Negative changes in thinking and mood,
  • Changes in physical and emotional reactions. 

Intrusive Memories

Some of the most common symptoms of intrusive memories may include recurrent, unwanted distressing memories of the event that occurred. Often, it also includes reliving the event through flashbacks and having disturbing dreams about it. 

Avoidance

The most common avoidance symptom is forcing yourself to not think or talk about the traumatic event. Another symptom that people with PTSD will share is avoiding places, people, or activities that will remind them of the event.

Negative Changes In Thinking And Mood

When it comes to symptoms of negative changes in thinking and mood, negative thoughts about yourself and everyone around are what typically occurs first. It’s followed by the feeling of hopelessness about the future and memory problems, mostly regarding the traumatic event. 

People who are experiencing these symptoms might also have difficulty maintaining close relationships and even feel detached from their family and friends. Also, they might notice a lack of interest in activities they used to enjoy, which leads to struggling with experiencing positive emotions. 

Symptoms of Changes In Physical And Emotional Reactions 

These symptoms will be noticeable to people around the person with PTSD as well. For instance, they might become easily startled or frightened, or always be on guard for danger. They can also start experiencing self-destructive behavior, such as driving too fast or drinking too much. 

Often, they will have trouble sleeping and concentrating. They might even have angry outbursts or show aggressive behavior which is not typical for them. 

The Intensity of PTSD Symptoms

Over time, all above-mentioned PTSD symptoms can vary in intensity. In other words, more symptoms can appear when you’re stressed or when something is reminding you of the traumatic event you went through. For instance, the sound of car breaks might remind you of the car accident you had a year ago and trigger a few PTSD symptoms. Or you might hear the news about a sexual assault and become overwhelmed with memories of your own event. 

There will be days where you won’t experience symptoms at all, and there will be days where you’ll feel hopeless. That’s why it’s vital to seek help from a mental health professional who can help you guide in this journey, while also providing you with the tools you need to manage better these symptoms each time they appear. 

Examples of Traumatic Events

Unfortunately, exists a wide range of traumatic events that might lead to a post-traumatic stress disorder, however, the most common ones are:

  • An accident
  • Childhood physical abuse
  • Combat exposure
  • Physical assault
  • Sexual violence
  • Being threatened with a weapon

Besides the mentioned ones, other traumatic events such as natural disasters, fire, mugging, plane crash, kidnapping, torture, terrorist attack. Or any other life-threatening event can lead to PTSD. If you or your loved ones have experienced a traumatic event. It’s recommended to seek professional support immediately instead of waiting until the symptoms appear. 

Regardless of whether the person will have to struggle with PTSD after such a traumatic event or not, talking to a therapist will be beneficial for their recovery. The sooner they seek help, the easier it will be to learn how to cope with the consequences of it. 

In Conclusion

Post-traumatic stress disorder is something you should never ignore. It affects how you interact with your loved ones and other people in your life. How you perform at work or school, how you see your future, and how you feel about yourself. For someone who is experiencing PTSD symptoms, it will be quite challenging to manage them successfully on their own. 

Dealing with post-trauma consequences can be overwhelming and lead to completely isolating yourself from the rest of the world. And it doesn’t have to be that way. With adequate treatment, you will gradually see how your social and professional lives are improving. Also how you feel more positive about everything around you. Most importantly, knowing that you can count on someone who can provide the right assistance in each situation provides the support someone who has been through a lot actually needs.

 

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About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT). And an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Trauma Therapy

Trauma Therapy & How It Can Help You

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Trauma Therapy & How It Can Help You

 

Experiencing trauma can be excruciating, and seeking trauma therapy is often the only way to a complete recovery from it. On its own, a person might feel confused about how to process what they have been through or how to start healing from the trauma. They want to recover and feel that sense of safety again, yet don’t know how to get there.

Trauma quite often has deep impacts on us, which can be overwhelming, so seeking help in a form of therapy is completely normal and should be a choice of every person who has gone through something like this. 

There is a range of trauma treatment programs that can help individuals heal from their traumas and help them continue living their life as they used to before the trauma occurred. In this article, we’ll review what trauma therapy entails and how a trauma therapist helps someone heal. 

How Trauma Affects Us

There are numerous reasons that trauma affects us negatively and causes post-traumatic stress. Trauma will physically change our brains, so when we experience a traumatic event, our minds will change. Due to the hyperarousal, which happened during trauma, areas of our brains that worked in a particular way will change. 

Our amygdalas will get overly activated once the traumatic experience occurred. The phrase “fight, flight, or freeze” refers to having a physical and emotional response to your trauma trigger. That makes you remember the trauma and the amygdala becomes overactive. In these moments, you will be hypervigilant and alert to ensure you’re safe from any potential danger. 

Experiencing trauma is very painful, and those who are hurting from it should always seek help. As a result of trauma, a person can develop several health disorders, personality changes, and other symptoms. 

Trauma Therapy

If you’ve experienced trauma, it would be best to seek a trauma therapist as soon as possible. Talking about the pain and starting to process what happened is an essential step to recovery. Although it might seem scary, this will help you process those past events and start living a fulfilled life that is not dominated by your traumatic experience. 

Finding a therapist skilled at helping individuals who have been through trauma is the best way to deal with your trauma and everything else it brought. As many therapy types exist, a person might feel like there is no difference between them, however, the best kind of therapy for trauma is undeniably trauma therapy. 

Experiencing trauma can have an impact on your life for many years and even if an event happened ten or twenty years ago, it can still hurt you. Trauma is not a problem that can be resolved easily on your own, so many people decide to talk to a trauma therapist with experience in helping people overcome all the stress, pain, and dysfunction from having lived such trauma. 

Trauma Therapy Benefits

Learning that trauma therapy is beneficial for individuals who have experienced any type of traumatic experience will help them seek help sooner. To start with therapy, a person will need to be aware of their trauma, their triggers, and the way they react to those triggers. All these things will help your therapist understand how the trauma has affected you and where they’ll need to direct the therapy to help you recover from it. 

There are many objectives a person wishes to achieve with therapy, yet they all have something in common – healing. To heal, a person needs to be willing to share all information about their traumatic experience and post-traumatic consequences. The more effort you put into the therapy, the bigger the chances you will recover completely quicker. 

Those who have experienced trauma will never be able to eliminate that event. So they should learn how to live happily and fulfilled without trauma affecting them. It needs to become an event that happened in the past and is just a memory of something that happened to you. Instead of it affecting most choices you make in life. 

Trauma Therapy Goals

As an individual or with your therapist, it might be beneficial to set goals for your therapy. That said, don’t treat these goals as a matter of success or failure. Your goals are something that should guide and motivate you throughout your therapy and help you heal. Here are some of the most common goals people with trauma will set for their therapy sessions:

  • Successfully handling the reality of the traumatic experience that happened to me in the past,
  • Eliminating the symptoms of trauma,
  • Boosting my day-to-day operations,
  • Sharing with people my hereditary trauma experience, 
  • Learning how to regain my “personal power”,
  • Getting over the addictions caused by traumatic stress, etc. 

Trauma Therapy Types

Although there are many different therapy types, only three of them are beneficial when dealing with trauma: trauma-focused cognitive behavioral therapy (TFCBT), psychodynamic psychotherapy. And eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR).

Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy 

This type of therapy refers to a unique form of cognitive-behavioral therapy that helps individuals with trauma by dealing with the thoughts related to that experience. Typically, a person will have between 10 to 25 sessions. Followed by further trauma-focused therapy to continue recovering from all the secondary problems that might arise as trauma symptoms. 

Psychodynamic Psychotherapy

This is a common type of therapy aiming to uncover all the conflicts and content that exist in the unconscious mind of a person that experienced a traumatic event. Psychodynamic psychotherapy emerged from methods of psychoanalysis and it monitors how interpersonal relationships can positively affect your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. It’s mostly used when a person needs to become aware of the trauma to deal with it properly. 

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)

EMDR is one of the most recent types of psychotherapy. Intending to help individuals process their traumatic experiences in healthier ways. This type of psychotherapy assumes that the mind is constantly moving towards an individual’s mental health until there is a blockage in that flow. The trauma therapist will use external stimuli, such as eye movements or hand tapping, to direct the patient’s attention outwards.

Regardless of the treatment, trauma therapy can have incredible benefits and help individuals heal from their traumatic events. With proper care, you will soon be able to enjoy your life and make the most of it and your trauma will stay where it belongs – in the past.

 

Couples Communication Strategies

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT). And an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Psychological Dependence

Psychological Dependence: Definition & How To Deal With It

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Psychological Dependence: Definition & How To Deal With It

 

Each psychological and emotional process has a physiological basis. And every behavior that is not simply reflex action has a vital emotional and psychological component. Therefore, thinking of mind and body as two separated entities leads to unrealistic and incorrect ways of looking at any behavior type. It is mostly seen in cases of substance use disorders and process additions. 

For instance, claiming that “gambling addiction is not a choice’’ is equally wrong as claiming it is a choice. Human beings are too complex to say their behavior is “entirely physical” or “entirely psychological”. To truly understand how addictive behavior develops, both physical and psychological dependence will need to be considered. 

Psychological Dependence Definition

Psychological dependence is a term used to describe the emotional and mental processes associated with development. And recovery from a substance use disorder or process addiction. It must be viewed as a combination of emotions and cognitions, as they intertwine in their existence. 

When talking about psychological dependence, most cases refer to the cognitive and emotional aspects of addictive behaviors or withdrawing from drug or alcohol use. This is quite different from attempting to classify certain substances or activities as addictive either in a physiological or physical way. 

Psychological Dependence Symptoms

There are several symptoms associated with the psychological components of any type of addictive behavior (psychological dependence). Not every person will have all of these symptoms and some of them will be expressing them mildly, while others more than that. People with psychological dependence will often have cravings, mostly food-related ones. Also, they might have anxiety issues that occur each time someone tries to stop their addictive behavior. Instead of anxiety, a person can have depression issues when not being able to proceed with their addictive behavior due to someone or something. 

They might also struggle with sleeping well as their sleep often is disrupted when trying to stop consuming the substance or it’s not available to a person. When not consuming or trying to quit their addiction, whichever it might be, they will probably feel irritability and restlessness. A wide variety of moods might happen each time a person is not able to use their substance of choice or is trying to quit. These mood swings are usually quite obvious externally, too. 

Besides how they feel, their behavior will change significantly as well. For instance, they will have issues with concentration, memory, problem-solving, and judgment in general. When talking about physical dependence, symptoms such as nausea, vomiting, seizures, diarrhea, hallucinations are quite common. 

Substances In Psychological Dependence

It’s considered that all substances of abuse are associated with both psychological and physical aspects of dependence. Yet, numerous sources are separating the aspects related to the development of a substance use disorder and withdrawing from it into substances associated with withdrawal symptoms which are psychological. Usually, they include: 

  • Most stimulants, which include cocaine and Ritalin
  • Most hallucinogenic drugs (e.g. LSD)
  • Cannabis products
  • Numerous inhalant products
  • Numerous psychotropic medications (e.g. antidepressant medications)

When talking about substances relate to the development of strong physical dependence usually include:

  • Alcohol
  • Opiate drugs – heroin, morphine, Vicodin, etc.
  • Benzodiazepines – Xanax, Valium, Ativan, etc.
  • Barbiturates – Seconal and phenobarbital.

Psychological Dependence Treatment 

The use of drugs that are considered to lead to physical dependence, such as alcohol, barbiturates. And benzodiazepines, can lead to the development of potentially fatal seizures. Yet, this generally doesn’t occur with withdrawal from opiate drugs, which are considered to be very physically addicting. 

Individuals with a substance use disorder will need to be strictly monitored by a physician or psychiatrist specialized in addiction medicine during their recovery. Such level of care and caution is required to be able to identify and potential seizure activity and if it occurs, act on time and help the individual. When treating any substance use disorder, the initial program of physician-assisted withdrawal management is essential for recovery. 

This type of approach is recommended because initial recovery from any substance of abuse can be intertwined with emotional and physical distress that might lead to dangerous scenarios for the person. Examples of such dangerous scenarios are overdosing during a relapsed, being involved in accidents, or trying to commit suicide. 

When compared to those with physical addition or physical dependence, individuals with psychological dependence will not have much difference in the overall plan of recovery. It will be required that they are thoroughly assessed, guided by a physician. And treat for any issues that might appear as a consequence of their substance use. Also, they are often involved in substance use disorder therapy, which is crucial for their recovery. 

Most of the time, they will also get involved in social support groups or seek support from their family and friends. Understanding how challenging and frustrating at the time the recovery process can be. A strong support system is essential to recover.

Conclusion

Without a doubt, psychological dependence is associated with various emotional and cognitive symptoms. By separating physical dependence from psychological dependence, enormous damage is done in understanding this condition and, more importantly, in treating it. Treatment of any substance use disorder must be seen as with both emotional and cognitive symptoms.  

While psychological dependence is definitely associated with both emotional and cognitive symptoms. Physical dependence is usually associated with tolerance development and withdrawal symptoms that are not emotional nor cognitive. 

To understand addictive behavior means to accept the interplay of both emotional and cognitive mechanisms. Any treatment that aims to help a person recover from substance use disorder should be holistic in nature and consider all possible treatment options that lead to recovery. And, although the recovery plan might be long, frustrating. And scary, many individuals have successfully recovered from psychological dependence and are now enjoying their lives with their loved ones.

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. 

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Bipolar Symptoms

Bipolar Symptoms: How To Notice Them On Time

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Bipolar Symptoms: How To Notice Them On Time

 

You probably think you know all about bipolar disorder, yet the majority of us are unable to notice bipolar symptoms when they start occurring to us or our close ones. This mental illness involves extreme mood changes from high to low and vice versa. With high mood being the period of mania, and low ones being the periods of depression, these changes often are mixed and too challenging to be controlled by the person going through these episodes. 

A person with bipolar disorder might feel ecstatic and depressed at the same time or these two moods can interchange. As there are more than five million people diagnosed with bipolar disorder only in the USA, it’s crucial to learn more about this mental illness, understand its symptoms so you can provide support to those who need it on time. 

Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar disorder is a mental illness that causes changes of moods between highs (mania) and lows (depression). The illness usually appears in the late teens or early adult years, yet it’s not uncommon to see it in children as well. When comparing, women are more likely to have bipolar diagnoses than men.

As it is with many mental illnesses, bipolar disorder is often difficult to diagnose, so it’s important to understand the symptoms that are occurring to provide adequate treatment on time. 

Symptoms of Bipolar Disorder

The bipolar signs and symptoms can vary from one person to another. Not to mention that many symptoms can appear due to other conditions, which only makes it more difficult to diagnose someone with bipolar disorder.

When talking about bipolar symptoms, they are usually divided into two categories – symptoms for mania and symptoms for depression.

Mania Symptoms

Mania can cause other symptoms in a person as well, yet there are several key symptoms of this bipolar disorder phase:

  • feeling overly happy or being in a ‘’high’’ mood for a long time
  • losing the need for sleep
  • talking very fast and having fast thoughts 
  • feeling restless and/or impulsive
  • feeling overly confident in your abilities
  • becoming easily distracted 
  • engaging in any form of risky behavior (e.g. impulsive sex, gambling)

Depression Symptoms

Just like mania, depression can cause another set of symptoms in a person. These are the key depression symptoms to look for in a person:

  • feeling sad and/or hopeless for a long time
  • isolating yourself from friends and family
  • feeling exhausted or without energy
  • considering or attempting suicide

Types of Bipolar Disorder

Overall, they are four types of bipolar disorder, yet only two of them are most commonly diagnosed. Bipolar I is the classic form of bipolar disorder which was previously called ‘’manic depression’’. This form of bipolar disorder has really clear and noticeable manic phases. The behavior and mood changes of a person are extreme, and it’s followed by the behavior they are unable to control. 

To be diagnosed with bipolar I, a person will need to have manic episodes. For an event to be defined as a manic episode, it needs to: 

  • include mood or behavior changes that are unlike that person
  • be present the majority of the day, and almost every day 
  • last at least one week or be so extreme that hospital care is required 

Those who are diagnosed with bipolar I will usually also have depressive episodes, yet they are required for the diagnosis of bipolar I.

The second most commonly diagnosed type of bipolar disorder is bipolar II. It’s considered even more common than bipolar I. This type involves depressive symptoms, yet its manic signs are less severe, so they are called hypomanic symptoms. Hypomania typically gets worse if the person doesn’t receive treatment which can lead to severe mania or depression. 

With both of these types, the support of friends and love ones will be of tremendous value as most of the time, a person with bipolar symptoms is unaware of it. Usually, they are not the ones who seek professional help on their own, so it’s vital to have a good support system. 

Rare Bipolar Types

As bipolar I and II are the most common types of bipolar disorder, we will need to mention the other two types of this mental illness. One of them is cyclothymic disorder which also involves mood changes, yet these changes will be less dramatic in nature. A person who was diagnosed with cyclothymic disorder can function without their medication, yet it’s not easy for them. More importantly, without proper treatment, this diagnosis may develop into bipolar I or II. 

Bipolar disorder not otherwise specified involves a person that only has some of the mentioned bipolar symptoms. However, these symptoms are not enough to be diagnosed with one of the three bipolar types.

Being Diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder

If a person doesn’t have severe mania, bipolar symptoms might be difficult to spot. A person with hypomania might feel more energized or more confident than usual. As we all tend to experience these feelings, it’s difficult to diagnose a person with a mental disease. Not to mention that a person will rarely complain about being more confident at work or having more energy and being physically active, for instance. 

People will more likely seek help if they feel depressed, and that might take away your doctor’s focus from the manic side of the illness. Yet, once your doctor has given you a diagnosis, they will decide on what’s the best treatment program for you. Some of the most common bipolar disorder treatments include: 

  • medication
  • behavioral therapy
  • electroconvulsive therapy
  • substance abuse treatment 

Seeking Help 

If you are suspecting that you or someone close to you might have bipolar disorder, the best advice is to talk to a professional. Only a trained medical professional will be able to diagnose bipolar disorder and prescribe proper treatment. Any of the treatment options a person will be given can tremendously help to get all of the symptoms under control and live a fulfilled, happy life. 

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. 

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

How To Respond to Verbal Abuse

How To Respond To Verbal Abuse In a Healthy Way

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How To Respond To Verbal Abuse In a Healthy Way

 

This blog discussed how to respond to verbal abuse, when you are not in a dangerous situation.

If you are in a dangerous place and there is abuse, get out of that situation!

Most of us were NOT taught how to relate with clear or compassionate communication. Therefore, if you are in a place wondering how to respond to verbal abuse, you will get the tips you need here.

In our culture, we weren’t taught about healthy boundaries, on how to make requests (instead of demands).

What this means is that we will be spending our lives training in these NEW skills, and practicing them.

We start here in the AASECT Model of PLISSIT. P is for permission! A therapist will tell you that YOU are precious. You are perfectly imperfect in all human ways. Which means that ALL of you deserves to be seen and loved. In other words, ALL of your Inner Aspects deserve to be seen and loved by ourselves – by you!

Each of your inner parts have a purpose and need at the Boardroom Table in your mind… when these internal parts of us are recovered, discovered, uncovered and loved unconditionally by you.

The person who is verbally abusing you has a right to their parts too; however, you are allowed to request that they share those parts with themselves and find a new way to talk with you.

These parts of me have been given some chance to transform, heal, and these wounds can become wisdom for a new future as I sit and take the time to do the work.

So… I literally practice SELF Care. Really. Daily. I even talk to myself in my mind in a loving manner which I didn’t used to. It used to be seeing someone I cared about with someone else felt like I was LOSING something.

What I realize now, which I didn’t then, is that OTHERS may or may not be “up” for knowing my Inner Aspects. Not everyone wants to hear all inner parts unfiltered. That’s ok because our primary love relationship isn’t with another… it’s with yourself. To me, it is HEALTHY to move toward spending time with those with whom I can collaborate (in a healthy manner) on getting both of our needs met.

It is healthy to spend LESS time with those we cannot (including family and / or friends).

I work to lead my life as a centered, mature adult which sounds to me DIFFERENT than being in a relationship with those who continue to use verbal abuse when talking to me.

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. 

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

10 Things To Do When Feeling Lonely

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10 Things To Do When Feeling Lonely

 

Have you been feeling lonely or a bit down lately? Maybe you’ve noticed a lack of energy… 

Don’t worry, you are not the only one. 

The world is changing so rapidly, and adapting to it is becoming incredibly challenging for the majority of us. 

With the COVID pandemic around us, it’s really not a surprise that isolation led to more and more people feeling lonely.

But, this loneliness is definitely not something you should ignore. It’s one thing to feel sad or down a day or two due to the recent events in your life, however, when it affects your perspective on life, it’s time to do something about it.

Here are ten things you can do to not feel lonely and improve the quality of your spare time.

 

#1 Discover something new about yourself.

Is it time to take a paintbrush into your hand and start painting again like you used to do when you were a child? Or, maybe start writing short fiction stories which you used to love reading during your spring breaks? We’re not talking about hobbies or interests here, we’re talking about the activities that will wake up the creative, curious and content part of you. Just think about all those things you were always postponing to do and do them now. 

 

#2 Adopt an animal.

As much as animals are a responsibility, having them around can reduce the feeling of loneliness. They are great company, love to cuddle, go for walks and you’ll be thrilled once they learn a trick or two. If you’re not that sure it’s a smart move, why not provide a lovely cat or a dog with a home for just a few weeks? You will easily find this option in many animal organizations and shelters. 

 

#3 Reach out to an old friend.

Feeling of loneliness can sometimes appear when we don’t have anything new or exciting in our lives to connect with. Instead of going for a coffee with your best friend who knows you inside and out, how about reaching out to an old friend from your hometown or your school? You can use social media to reach out to them casually and ask them if they are available any time soon. And don’t worry if you don’t live close, you can always connect over a video call!

 

#4 Start volunteering.

You are probably passionate about a thing or two. How about you start investing your time in making the world a better place? When feeling lonely, sharing your time with those who need it will make you feel really fulfilled and connected with them. In the end, the feeling of belonging and seeing your value in the community will show you that you are never actually alone. You can even look for online volunteering opportunities, such as writing articles about women rights or helping launch creative eco-friendly campaigns.

 

#5 Create your wishlist.

Maybe you are feeling a bit stuck in this period of your life, but you can always use your imagination to escape. Where would you like to be in one year from now? How would you like your free time to be spent? Who would you like to be around? Is there any new sport or hobby you’d like to learn? Don’t limit yourself, write down everything that comes to mind. Once done, store it somewhere safe and wait for the next year to see how much of it you have accomplished.

 

#6 Write letters to your loneliness.

Treat the feeling of loneliness as your friend. Acknowledge it’s here and start writing letters to it. Write how it’s making you feel and what you like and don’t like about it. Not only will you feel better because you got all of that out of your system, but you will also start to differentiate that feeling from what you truly are. With time, you will understand that feeling lonely is only one part of you, but that it doesn’t define who you are. 

 

#7 Find you happy music, movies and shows.

What’s your favorite TV show that always makes you laugh even after watching it several times? What’s the music you will play if you want to dance and just jump around like nobody’s watching? Well, create your own list and once you feel lonely, blast that music or stream your favorite comedy and give yourself some time to laugh and simply to feel good. 

 

#8 Take a walk.

The majority of people will advise you to fight your loneliness with physical activity and although they are not wrong, it’s not that easy as it sounds. If you’re feeling lonely, you will probably not be inspired to go to the gym and spend 2 hours there. Instead, go for a walk and play a podcast you like or put on mediation music when you’re walking in the park or any other place that you like. If it’s one of those days where it’s difficult to even get out of bed, why don’t you walk to the restaurant in your neighbourhood and eat your breakfast there? As you probably won’t feel motivated to cook on days like these, walking to a restaurant is definitely a great idea!

 

#9 Invite a friend.

You will not feel lonely with company. And, as much as you are not motivated to invite someone over when you are feeling down, you should really do it. Invite them to prepare lunch with you, talk to you over a cup of coffee, help you organize your closet and get rid of the old clothes, fix broken things in your home, etc. Adding a purpose to it will bring additional value and create some good memories for both of you.

 

#10 Talk to a therapist.

When all of the above doesn’t work and you really don’t know what to do to stop feeling lonely, you should consider talking to a therapist. A professional will find the reasons why you are feeling like this and give you the best tools to manage it to have an exciting, healthy life. Talking always helps, but talking to someone who knows how to manage the situation you are in will be extremely beneficial for you in so many ways. You will already notice this after the first session, and be even more inspired to do all the other things from this list.

If you have any questions, or for clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized sessions on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. 

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Anxiety Therapist

When is the Time to Visit an Anxiety Therapist?

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When is the Time to Visit an Anxiety Therapist?

 

Nowadays, everyone is talking about anxiety and, although it’s generally a good thing, we tend to forget that people struggling with it deserve proper care and help. If you’re noticing signs of anxiety. Maybe it’s time to consider visiting an anxiety therapist who will provide you with the tools you need to successfully manage all areas of your life.  

To help you understand what anxiety is, how it can be treated and what are the first steps to take once you realize you have anxiety, read through all the important information about it below. 

 

First Signs of Anxiety

Anxiety symptoms usually will start in early childhood, but more than often they will not be detected on time. That’s why the majority of people get diagnosed with anxiety many years later. So, once a person is more aware of this disorder and how it’s affecting their everyday life, it’s much easier to find the right treatment and act accordingly.

These are the most common first signs of anxiety:

  • Feeling nervous or restless
  • Having unpleasant experiences such as panic or danger
  • Sweating
  • Increasing in the heart rate
  • Hyperventilating
  • Trembling
  • Having trouble concentrating

 

Different Types of Anxiety

Once you start researching this disorder, you will notice it has several types, and you have probably heard of almost all of them. Panic disorder, phobias, obsessive-compulsive disorder, social anxiety disorder, post-traumatic stress and generalized anxiety disorder are the six principal types of anxiety.

To be considered a disorder, anxiety has to cause distress which will make it difficult for the person to keep up with some or all areas of their lives. Anxiety disorders will not disappear on their own and if not treated on time, there’s a potential risk of developing depression as well. Luckily, many treatments have proven to be successful in people with anxiety so the person can get adequate care right away. 

 

Anxiety Treatments

With anxiety, the crucial thing to know is that every use of medication needs to be supervised. But, before even considering medications, you should be aware that therapy is the most effective treatment for people coping with anxiety.

An adequate therapy will give a person all the tools they need to successfully manage anxiety in all of their daily activities. The therapy is focused on making the person stronger and giving it the feeling of control which lacks when the first signs of anxiety appear. 

As there are plenty of therapists applying different therapeutic techniques. A person with anxiety disorder should always seek an anxiety therapist as they are solely focused on that particular area and work only with patients coping with anxiety. Talking to an anxiety therapist will provide them with exactly what they need from the first session.

 

Finding the Perfect Anxiety Therapist

For those who are struggling with anxiety, having a professional who is experienced in treating patients with anxiety is what gives hope and motivation to start the treatment. After all, one of the reasons why people don’t seek help is because they believe they will not receive the help they need.

Instead of treating all mental health problems, anxiety therapists have chosen anxiety as their area of interest. They are well experienced in the existing treatment methods and understand which is the adequate method for each of their patients. 

While searching for the right anxiety therapist, it’s vital to make the decision based on personal preferences. After all, a person will talk regularly with their chosen therapist and personal preference is an important factor of progress. To check if they have experience in treating anxiety, you can search their website or look for their interviews or published articles. 

Most importantly, check what their previous patients say about them. Good therapists will always be recommended on forums, social media groups and other platforms where people are sharing this type of information.

 

Tips for Coping with Anxiety 

Before sharing a few valuable pieces of advice on how you can make it a bit easier for yourself if you’re coping with anxiety, be aware that without professional help. It will be incredibly challenging to achieve progress. There will be days where you will feel good, but don’t forget that anxiety is a disorder and it needs to be treated. By ignoring it, you will only make it worse for yourself.

That being said, you will probably not be able to run to see your anxiety therapist immediately after experiencing an unpleasant event. So, what can you do?

  • Notice your anxiety and become its friend. Don’t try running away from it.
  • When you feel anxious, always remember to take 10 breaths slowly as it will relax you and reduce the tension in your body.
  • Anxiety has its triggers. Once you learn which are yours, try to be aware of them when you’re near them. This way, you won’t be so overwhelmed by your triggers.
  • Accept you cannot control the outside world. The one that you can control and can become more comfortable is inside you.
  • Share how you are feeling with a friend or family member who understands and conversation with them makes you feel better.
  • Start practicing meditation. Even 10 minutes per day can be beneficial for your mind and soul.
  • Don’t isolate yourself. To avoid diving into your anxiety, become more active and go for walks, runs or plan a dinner with friends.

 

Acceptance is the act of courage

If a person is struggling with anxiety, the first step to recovery is accepting it. Be brave enough to determine you will do everything it takes to have the great life you deserve. Anxiety can be successfully treated and just by talking to an anxiety therapist, you will notice incredible progress. 

Anxiety is only one part of your life, and just how you learn to manage other aspects of your life, you can learn to manage anxiety as well. In the end, you don’t have to control anxiety, you should only learn how to stop letting anxiety control you. 

If you have any questions, or for clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized sessions on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. 

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

How to Deal with Anxiety

How to Deal with Anxiety

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How to Deal with Anxiety

 

How to deal with anxiety, other than just seeing a therapist, is to notice what occupies space in the mind. 

Some of how to deal with anxiety may manifest in the body (such as lack of focus, nervousness, sweatiness, and restlessness). 

As with most problems, there are short-term “fixes” and long term “cures.”

 

Short-Term How To Deal With Anxiety

To get quick relief on how to deal with anxiety, you can combine one or more of these tips:

  • If you are anxious about something that is going to happen soon, such as a test or interview:
    • Do your homework
    • Ensure that you have reviewed everything pertinent to make yourself as prepared 
    • Being prepared is one of the best ways to avoid anxiety

  • When you notice the thought process of anxiousness beginning to happen, stop and take slow and deep breaths by keeping your entire focus on breathing. 
    • Try sitting in a comfortable position, close your eyes and take 10 deep breaths. 
    • If this does not help incorporate a muscle relaxation technique. 
    • Scrunch your toes tight then release them, and gradually work up your body.

  • If an anxious thought enters your mind and refuses to go away, force it out! 
    • Think of a color and imagine the color in your mind. 
    • Repeat the color, such as “Blue, blue, blue” until your mind releases the nagging thought.

  • Try to identify what it is about the situation which is making you anxious. 
    • If you are struggling to make a decision about something, make 2 lists: one of the positives about the decisions, and one with the negatives. 
    • Weigh each item on a scale of 1-10, and then add it up, so you can see which list outweighs the other.

  • Try not to worry about things you have no control over. 
    • Easier said than done! 
    • If you find thoughts of global warming, terrorism, or world peace are making you anxious, slow down and focus on what you can control in your local community. 
    • Think about what control you have over these topics. 
    • If reading about these topics on social media is fueling your anxiety, please stop reading them

  • Avoid taking on every project that comes along. 
    • It is okay to let go of things that are making you anxious. It is perfectly okay to say “NO!” 
    • Maintaining your life into an organized state where you feel comfortable is key.

  • Your emotional state affects your thought process, and can cause anxiety. 
    • Avoid clutter & clean up your space – it really helps. 
    • Even having fresh flowers on your counter can help brighten your mood.

  • Go for a walk and get some fresh air. 
    • Practice “walking mindfulness” which is where you walk and pay attention to the way you walk. 
    • Try to focus on appreciating that you are walking as opposed to letting your mind wander. 
    • By letting your mind wander or judge, it will tune into the same horror channels as before.
    • Stay in the moment and practice saying things to yourself like:
      • I love you
      • It’s going to be ok
      • I am listening

Dealing with immediate symptoms of anxiety will only provide short term relief. 

To be able to reduce your tendency to be anxious over the long run, you need to take a more organized approach to train your mind on how to deal with anxiety.

 

Long-Term How To Deal With Anxiety 

Identify and learn to manage your triggers:

  • When you figure out your trigger(s), you should try to limit your exposure if you can. 
  • If you cannot limit it, learn which coping methods work best for you. 
  • Some common triggers are stressful jobs, driving or traveling, withdrawal from alcohol, or trauma.

Do daily or routine meditation:

  • While this takes some practice to do successfully, mindful meditation, when done regularly, can eventually help you train your brain to dismiss anxious thoughts when they arise.

Try supplements or change your diet

  • Changing your diet or taking supplements is definitely a long-term strategy. 
  • Research shows supplements or nutrients can help mental health symptoms:
    • Examples include: fish oil, omega-3 fatty acids, Vitamin D, Green tea, vitamin B, etc. 

Supplements and nutrients can take up to three months before your body is running on the nutrients these herbs provide for your body.

Keep your body and mind healthy:

  • Exercising regularly 
  • Eating balanced meals
  • Getting enough sleep
  • Staying connected to people who care about you 

These are all ways on how to deal with your anxiety symptoms.  

If you have any questions, or for clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized sessions on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. 

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

Emotional Detachment

Stop Emotional Detachment and Take A Time Out! 

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Stop Emotional Detachment and Take A Time Out! 

 

If you experience emotional detachment while arguing with a partner, try something new. 

When you feel triggered by your partner(s), stop and take a time out with yourself. 

 

Unless there is violence happening, or there is a situation of life / death, the situation will benefit from time. 

Emotional detachment is when we hit an internal wall of intimacy due to recognizing our wounded past. 

When this happens, emotions are projected onto partner(s) or loved ones.

The goal is not to emotionally detach, yet to learn, to feel, to reveal, take responsibility and invite collaboration with others.

All those within an argument can ask for a time out when needed. 

Take a minimum of 20 minutes so that your prefrontal cortex can come back online! 

While you calm yourself down and / or slow down your numbness, try to stay emotionally engaged. 

Some things to consider asking:

  • What is the emotion of what I am feeling? 
  • What are the words in my head?
  • When is the earliest in my childhood that I recall saying these words inside my head 
  • When is the earliest in my childhood that I remember feeling this way?
  • Do any memories/pictures arise when I ask that?

Then, journal, dance, move through the emotion on your own. 

Use coping strategies (such as distress tolerance, interpersonal effectiveness, grounding and meditation techniques) to tune into the CORE of the hurt. 

Then, go back to the person or event that was triggering. Now that you are resourced and more grounded, it is time to connect with another. 

Emotional detachment is harmful to the relationship, so it’s important to practice interpersonal connection with those you love instead. 

If you have consent, you can calmly and courageously reveal what is happening for you. 

 

Using Compassionate Communication instead of Emotional Detachment

  •  Make a request
  •  Let them know a limit or boundary
  •  Invite collaboration

 

“I am noticing that for me, when there is a tone of voice like I heard, it reminds me of an uncomfortable experience from my youth. I can either let you know in the future that that’s happening for me. Are you willing to be a part of redirecting the conversation?” 

If you have any questions, or for clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized sessions on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. 

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

“I Hate my Therapist”

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“I Hate my Therapist”

 

It is startling how often we are told “I hate my therapist” and that is why clients are requesting services. 

Many clients show up to the first session, called an intake, and discuss how terrible their experiences have been in therapy thus far. 

Oftentimes, a session or two is spent talking about why they state “I hate my therapist.” Working through how that impacted them is important so we can make this experience different. 

 

Horror Stories from Clients

If some of these stories are too familiar to you, you probably do not have the right therapist. The stories are heard included some of the following: 

  • Many people have had TERRIBLE experiences in therapy
  • They were shamed
  • Therapists fell asleep
  • Connection was not great
  • Were not challenged
  • Were not validated 
  • Did not feel seen
  • Experienced a therapist who was discriminated against them

Topics listed here are horror stories from clients that stated they hated their past therapist. 

Unfortunately, in our society, it is considered normal to stay with a provider regardless of how “helpful” we feel it is. A lot of my clients felt like they had to stay with therapists, doctors, and other providers because “they had to.” 

Each of us have different needs in a therapist and that makes sense – we are all different! But having a therapist that works for you means YOU need to feel connected and comfortable with them. Therapy is vulnerable, emotional, and can be intense so it is important that you are getting your needs met. 

 

What Can I Do?

Here are some tips and tricks on some things to do to help you find the best fit for you.

  • Write a list of qualities you want your therapist to have
  • Figure out what you need to focus on, look up therapists who list that
  • Look up reviews on the therapist and the practice
  • Talk to people in your life about their experiences 

If you are in therapy already these questions might help.

 

Questions to Ask Yourself:

  • Do you feel connected to your therapist?
  • Do you feel heard by your clinician?
  • Are they collaborating with you?
  • Can you give them feedback or advocate for yourself?
  • Do they seem open and non-judgmental?
  • Are they clear? Are you able to clearly communicate with them?
  • Do they take accountability when they mess up or misunderstand?
  • Are they able to model appropriate behavior (boundaries, communication, etc)?
  • Do they care about your experience and your needs?
  • Do they notice your patterns?
  • Are they validating? Are they supportive?
  • Do they explore underlying issues?
  • Are they reliable? 
  • Do you feel like your goals are being met or addressed?
  • Are they responsive?
  • Are they on time? Do they end on time?
  • Do they ask your consent?

It’s important that we value ourselves and our care. 

I hope that this post helps when you hate your therapist! Please find a way to work with providers who you want to keep working with, this will help you have a conversation to help you figure out if they are the right fit for you!

If you have any questions, or for clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized sessions on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

How to get out of depression How to get out of depression

How to Get out of Depression – Step by Step Guide!

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How to Get out of Depression – Step by Step Guide!

 

Depression is a complex illness and how to get out of depression is even more challenging. 

Depression can affect mental and emotional health, including physical, social, and professional side effects. How to get out of depression may be good for all to learn, as those we love may hide it. 

Put simply, the disorder is exhausting, life-altering, and sometimes deadly. 

Here are some ways to help you learn how to get out of depression! 

 

Step by Step Guide – You Can Read It In Order Or Apply Out Of Order!

 

Step One:

The low feeling might be caused by a chemical imbalance. Start by accessing what you are putting in your body. This includes smoking, drinking and food choices for those who are sensitive. After you have reviewed a couple days worth of intake choices, try by keeping the foods that are working and eliminating those that make your mental illness feel worse. If it has no effect, no problem. 

 

Step Two:

Do light exercising to get out of depression. Moving your body allows you to have a different relationship with your body. Not only does exercise allow for a distraction, it creates endorphins to help boost your mood. 

Depression is common among people who have had major surgeries or injuries, so be careful not to overdo it. A small chart or journal to record your daily activities will help you see the progress from the beginning. QUICK intervals of exercise are more effective than hurting yourself. 

 

Step Three:

If you are experiencing isolation, try a new or different environment. 

Maybe the living room of your house has little light and you feel extra gloomy in there. Have you considered that you can add a lamp? Even rearranging the furniture so your favorite chair is closer to the window might help create a new vibe in the room. 

In some cases, just finding 20 minutes to sit outside for fresh air can be the change of environment you need. Additionally, considering breaking out of the same routine each night can be a game changer too. Step by step on how to get out of depression is important. It isn’t going to happen all of the sudden!

 

Step Four:

Do something for someone else if you desire. So, by doing even the smallest thing for someone else (making them a card), your mood may get a boost. 

Sometimes depression can cause one to feel hopeless. Instead of focusing on what you cannot do, focusing on what you change in the world is important. 

It could be as small as picking a flower on your walk to the bus stop and giving it to the lady you see daily. In response to a kind gesture, sometimes, people are gracious back. That warm feeling does not have to cost you money and you get the endorphins by contributing to someone’s day being brighter. Contribution is a basic human need and it will help our mental health if we can access it. 

 

Step Five:

Find a way to reduce stress. Therefore, care for yourself in ways that comfort you. Wear comfortable clothes, draw a warm bath weekly, or simply pick up a book. Each person is different. So, maybe for you it is taking a painting class or cooking a new recipe for dinner.

For me, looking up recipes can be calming, yet the making of the meal can get overwhelming. If this is also true for you, this will not help you get out of depression. 

Attune the activity for your benefit. Check in and ask yourself what you did for hours as a child that brought you joy. 

 

Step Six:

Find “you” time by keeping boundaries. It is important to ensure time for yourself and a space where you feel relaxed. 

While life may take its toll, remember to shut all the daily bothers at a certain time of day (even for 15 minutes) just focus on you. 

The time away from the troublesome bothers of your day will help you refresh and be able to handle them better.

If this doesn’t work, put in 15 minutes a day to actually fixate on what is bothering you, so then the rest of the day, you eliminate the automatic negative thoughts. 

 

Step Seven: Reconnect with Nature. While it seems easier said than done, many people do this daily and do not realize it. How many of you noticed the lack of attunement to others and nature during the pandemic quarantine? 

While some may think of reconnecting with nature as going hiking or camping, it could be as simple as opening your Uber window. The littlest observations with nature can help soothe and give your mind a new focus.

Buying a bird feeder and hanging out a window each day is one example of how to appreciate nature. 

As the seasons change you can observe what new birds come back during the year. This is something that I learned from living in a first responder family, because nature can be incredibly healing when you are terrorized weekly by what you see in your career.

 

Step Eight:

Chart & record your progress. Even the smallest improvements can be celebrated. Whether you choose to try all of the steps above or simply pick one and see how your mood changes, remember the smallest improvement can help you combat depression.

Overall, there is not one set way on how to get out of depression or cure your symptoms. It is important that we are equitable with ourselves and others to give them what they need. 

Depression does take time to combat, and each step in this guide can help lead you in the right direction. Of course, if you need personalized attention, seek counseling and psychotherapy! 

If you have any questions, or for clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized sessions on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. 

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.