How to keep cool while having sex in the summer
Recently Canela Lopez, writer at the Insider spoke to five sexologists and sex therapists on how to keep cool while having sex in the summer.
Amanda Pasciucco, LMFT, AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, International Clinical Sexologist and Life Coaching and Therapy founder was interviewed by Lopez and provided her tips on having comfortable sex in the summer hot weather:
1) Why do some people find it more uncomfortable to have sex in hot weather?
People find it uncomfortable, because they usually are breathing incorrectly to begin with and aren’t hydrated. Therefore, when you add heat, and perspiration, this triggers “turn off” to certain individuals. Specifically those who are sensitive to touch and scents.
2) What awesome steps can couples take to make sex in the summer months more comfortable?
It’s important to change your sheets weekly. Buy a sex blanket or use a towel to have close by! Always consider keeping lube right on your bedstead, so it is convenient.
If changing your sheets isn’t helping, it might be time to consider buying a bigger bed.
Those who have more space are often more comfortable. Especially if one tends to run hot, it gives them connection. What I notice for those who share a queen is that one partner will go to a different bedroom and that ends up causing a disconnect erotically for the couple.
- Summer heat can put a huge damper on your sex life, especially if you and your partner are sweat-averse.
- Cranking the A/C unit or central air might be your first instinct to deal with the heat, but positioning a fan above you or having sex on cooler surfaces like shower tile, kitchen counters, and washing machines can also help.
- Changing your outlook on sweat and body odor can also improve your sex life in the summer.
Sex in the summer can be a sticky disaster if you’re averse to sweat, body odor, and heat.
Though not everyone’s libido takes a hit, the heat can make couples more reluctant to get it on and even make it more difficult to cuddle.
“Vigorous sex can be a cardiovascular workout in and of itself, so sex in hot weather can be as challenging on the body as going for a run, for instance,” Dr. Yvonne K. Fulbright, a sexuality educator & author, told Insider. “Lovers may also be more self-conscious about being sweatier, stickier and smellier than normal, including in their groin area. Body ‘farts’ from the wetness may also be a consequence, as bodies rub together, and a humorous distraction.”
Psychologist and sex therapist Dr. Stephanie Buehler told Insider taking a lukewarm shower and patting down with a towel before having sex can help keep you cool while getting down and dirty.
If you have good balance, consider have shower sex.
“They make hand grips and foot shelves to make it possible,” Buehler told Insider. “If you’re both smaller in stature, you can try the tub.”
Running an air-conditioning unit can also help cool you down.
“Speaking from personal experience, if you are able, get solar and run your A/C with abandon,” Buehler told Insider.
But if you’re trying to save money, getting a small fan and positioning it strategically can be a great alternative.
“Position a fan so that it blows on you, as the cooling effect will bring your skin to life in a totally different way, [like] some lovers experiencing harder nipples,” Fulbright said. “Having the fan blow on your bottoms in certain positions [like] doggie style will have you experiencing sex in a noticeably different, but delightfully pleasurable way.”
Between the Sheets
Dr. Tammy Nelson, a sex and couples therapist and author of “Getting the Sex You Want,” told Insider the types of sheets you use during sex can actually be making you hotter. To avoid any unnecessary sweating, make sure to use pure cotton sheets.
“It’s important to change your sheets weekly,” Amanda Pasciucco, a sexologist and sex therapist based in Hartford, told Insider. “Buy a sex blanket or use a towel to have close by!”
If changing your sheets isn’t helping, Pasciucco said it might be time to consider buying a bigger bed.
“I realize that those who have more space are often more comfortable. Especially if one tends to run hot, it gives them connection,” Pasciucco told Insider. What I notice for those who share a queen is that one partner will go to a different bedroom and that ends up causing a disconnect erotically for the couple.”
A lot of the stress that comes with summertime sex comes from the amount of sex and body heat exchanged when getting intimate.
Different sex positions could help limit that contact while keeping things pleasurable.
“Try some positions where your bodies are not directly touching as much like from behind or off the side of the bed,” Dr. Rachel Needle, a psychologist and co-director of Modern Sex Therapy Institutes, told Insider. “The less your bodies touch, the cooler you will be.”
Doggie style, fisting, and ride style positions can all help you get around the heat.
Cold props and toys can offer fun sensations with while helping you and your partner (or partners) cool down.
“Rub ice cubes all over each other’s bodies to cool things off,” Needle said. “You can use cold items like ice creatively to increase pleasure and comfort.”
If you’re feeling particularly adventurous and the bedroom is simply too hot, trying out different surfaces around the house that are cooler to the touch can help.
“Find other places in your home and try new sexual positions, ones where you won’t have as much skin to skin contact,” Nelson told Insider. “For instance, standing up against counters in a kitchen or bathroom or up against washers or dryers in a laundry room. The stainless steel or granite can be cooler against your skin.”
If you live with roommates, make sure to ask before going ahead and disinfect the surface when you’re done.
“Talking sexy to each other, having phone sex, masturbating each other, or in front of each other can bring on less heat and be fun,” Needle said.
A remote control vibrator could also provide no-contact fun.
Strategically taking advantage of colder temperatures can also help you prevail against the humidity and heat.
“Try sex in the early morning or late evening when the days and nights are cooler,” Nelson said.
“Let yourself enjoy the fact that you’re sticking together and rubbing against each other in a different way — and perhaps feeling more as ‘one’ in the process,” Fulbright told Insider. “Consider any scents all the more primal.”
“Finally, think about how Hollywood has portrayed sweaty sex as sexy — and that you, too, can look sexy dripping, glistening, panting, anticipating, and wanting more,” Fulbright said.
Article link: https://www.insider.com/how-to-have-sex-when-hot-ice-cubes-shower-sex-2020-7
Enjoy your wonderful, sex-filled summer!
If you aren’t having the best sex of your life, schedule an appointment with Life Coaching and Therapy.