How Females Use Edging to Supercharge Orgasms

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How Female Edging Supercharges Orgasms

 

Sex is fun, yet female edging can make it better! 

Every once in a while, though, we need something more to mix things up and explore a little bit. 

That’s not to say things get boring, yet sometimes you just have to juice things up.

Intimacy is also all about exploring. Finding more ways to please yourself and your partner. Trying new stuff out should be fun, and make sex more interesting.

female edging

Edging refers to when you stay just on the edge of orgasm. It’s a great way to intensify your orgasms and improve your sexual awareness. Read on to hear more about edging and what you can get out of it.

 

Take Me to the Edge

Whether you’re masturbating alone or having a partner get you there, edging involves all of the foreplay and sexual buildup you normally experience on your way to climax. Once you’re there, though, you pump the brakes and let things rev down a bit, holding back climax.

If you’ve never tried it before, edging can offer a lot of sexual benefits, one of them being stronger, longer-lasting orgasms.

I hope you’ve noticed the difference between a great orgasm and a normal one before. There are times in our lives when we just need to climax to relieve some stress or we’re not up for marathon lovemaking sessions. That’s fine.

However, if you’ve ever had a mind-blowing, bury your face in the pillow screaming orgasm before, you know what it takes to get there. Those orgasms take time and a lot of foreplay. You likely engaged in some manual stimulation, oral sex, and some other awesome acts to get you to that place. Not to mention you’re probably doing it with someone you’re wild for.

Edging is similar in that the longer you wait and the more often you edge and retreat, the more incredible the final climax will eventually be. It’s worth the work, trust me.

 

Practice Makes Perfect

Edging isn’t easy. Many women who have a hard time orgasming feel like it’s climbing a mountain to simply get there, why would I want to slide back down and do it all over again?

That’s a concern, so the right technique is important to keep you on or as close to the edge as possible.

If you’re flying solo, it’s a good idea to use a vibrator and other toys to keep you stimulated. Just as you’re about to climax, stop any stimulation and pause, letting your blood flow ease a bit.

You’ll feel your orgasm slipping away; however, you don’t want to wait until it’s disappeared.

When you feel like you’re just on the other side of climaxing, resume whatever you were doing, whether it’s pressing your vibrator against your clitoris or using your hand. Work to get right back to the edge and rinse and repeat.

Soon, you’ll be getting goosebumps and your entire body will tingle as you play on the edge with your orgasm.

 

Female Edging Will Help with Sexual Awareness

Understanding your arousal cues will help you and your partner have better sex. A lot of people are concerned with their female partners’ sexual satisfaction. 

There is a reason so many of us have faked orgasms before. Some of them are pleasers in bed, and a lot of partners revel in a feeling of sexual prowess when the female they’re with experiences orgasm.

Female edging is a wonderful way to get your partner attuned to your orgasm ladder and what it takes to get up there. If you do it enough and your partner is paying attention, pretty soon they’ll know a bit of what turns you on.

When you edge with a partner, it can be even more fun because you can tease each other, and it adds to the sexual dynamic. 

There’s a bit of power play as your partner edges you close to orgasm and then moves it away. 

You can’t climax unless they “let” you, and some people love that feeling of submission and domination.

Your partner will be laser-focused on your breathing, the sounds you’re making, and the way your body moves in response to touch that elevates the sexual experience for both of you. 

Both of you will be engaged in a careful intimate interplay with greater connection and pleasure.

 

Using Female Edging with Masturbation

A lot of the time, you just need a one on one quickie. You’ve got to get to work, the kids will be up soon, or a million other things hinder your ability to take it slow when you masturbate.

That’s not the time to try edging. You’ll likely just end up frustrated.

However, when you have some decent alone time set aside, break out the toys and some lubrication and settle in for some you time. 

Female edging while you masturbate may help you overcome obstacles that you face when it comes to partnered sex.

You can learn to better control your arousal, speeding and slowing down as necessary. You can experiment with different levels of pressure, vibration cadences, and simultaneously touching your clitoris and tease the opening of the vagina to see how your arousal changes.

 

A Little Taunting Can Be Sexy!

Some individuals enjoy one orgasm, and then lose interest in longer sexual encounters. Female edging adds a playful element that can keep you interested by playing on the edge of climax. 

Once your partner has you in that edging zone, they’ll love the power they have to play with your body and tease you with the thought of orgasm.

female edging

One second, they’re pressing a vibrator against you, and the next they’re pressing their tongue or fingers against your clitoris, going back and forth at just the right speed to make sure you don’t go over the edge.

When the time is right, when you can’t stand it anymore, you’re definitely in for a treat. The prolonged foreplay and lengthy stimulation will deliver an incredible orgasm that’s better than most you’ve ever had before.

Are you ready to learn more and unlock a more satisfying experience?

 

Are you ready to learn more and unlock a more satisfying experience?

BLISS: Proven Methods for Improving the Female Orgasm

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

 

The perfect vagina

Sex Therapist Reveals How To Get The Perfect Vagina!

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HOW TO GET THE PERFECT VAGINA!

 

So you want to know more? Lets dive into the perfect vagina and the female anatomy! We will show you female anatomy drawings images.

I’m so glad that you are interested in joining the world of the anatomy of pleasure and getting a perfect vagina! This is what I have studied for the past 12 years!

In this video, I’ll teach you how to get a perfect vagina, how to love your perfect vulva, and how to teach others how to get one too, even if they are intimated! Learn the anatomy, stop comparing to porn, and learn to look! 

My tips will surely enlighten you on how to create a more adventurous and pleasure-focused sex life for you and your partner(s)!

Come Join Us By Clicking Below!

 

 

Are you ready to learn more and unlock a more satisfying experience?

BLISS: Proven Methods for Improving the Female Orgasm

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

Betty Dodson on Goop Lab on Netflix

Betty Dodson Featured on Goop Lab on Netflix

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Betty Dodson Featured on Goop Lab on Netflix

 

I am so excited for Betty and Carlin to be on the premier episode of Goop Lab on Netflix on January 24th. I will be watching my idol Betty Dodson as she talks about female pleasure, vulvas and orgasm techniques!

Betty Dodson is an artist, author, PhD sexologist, and one of the principal voices for women’s sexual pleasure and health for over four decades.

Betty was recently named one of the top ten sexual revolutionaries by Cosmopolitan magazine. She was also listed as number 43 of the 100 most important people in sex by Playboy Magazine.

Betty and Carlin run a BodySex Workshop to help women overcome negative body image and pleasure anxiety.

Check out my blog on my BodySex Workshop (a.k.a my naked female weekend) experience:

The Atlantic reviewed Goop Lab on Netflix and said this about Betty’s episode:

“The show’s strongest episode features Betty Dodson, the feminist sex educator, discussing the physics of women’s orgasms. It reads as a timely corrective to American culture’s tendency to treat women’s bodies as agents of shame.”

Watch the episode on January 24th and and learn from Betty and Carlin on Goop Lab on Netflix.

Watch the video trailer below.

Here is a thank you note I received from Carlin Ross…

Betty and I wanted to reach out and thank you for your support.  You trusted us with your deepest fears and shared your greatest vulnerabilities.  Your warmth and honesty helps us keep pushing forward.

Thank you to our Bodysex sisters.

On January 24th our Gwyneth Paltrow GOOP Lap on Netflix episode on female pleasure will air on Netflix.

Once again, I was Betty’s “stunt cunt” and we took the cameras through genital show and tell.

Additionally, Betty shared her Rock ‘n Roll orgasm technique.

Several of you submitted vulva pics to show the range of vulva styles YOU FUCKING CAME THROUGH BIG FOR US.

Thank you Thank you Thank you from the bottom of our clits.  To more orgasms for womankind.

Much love
Betty and Carlin

You can get more free content on relationship and sex tips by checking out my Youtube Channel – The Sex Healer. 

If you know someone that would benefit from this information, feel free to share it. 

 

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. For clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized coaching on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Call or text us at 203-733-9600 or make an appointment.

 

How the Other Woman Feels When It’s Over!

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How the Other Woman Feels When It’s Over!

 

How does the other woman feel when they’re caught up in an affair? Most of the time, they get overlooked or accused of wrecking what was a healthy marriage or partnership. That, though, isn’t always true.

When affairs happen, it’s easy to throw around absolutes over who was wrong and why things went down the way they did. Emotions run hot in relationships anyway. Add infidelity to the mix and things can get explosive.

Just as is the case in steady relationships, affairs happen on a spectrum. Some people get involved in affairs because of nefarious reasons. They love the thrill of cheating or are too cowardly. They can’t be honest with their spouse or partner. The cheating partner knows they’re doing something awful, but their ego overpowers their sense of morality.

Affairs aren’t always evil, as weird as that sounds. Going around your partner’s back for sex, connection, touch, or any other reason is never good, but if we’re honest with ourselves, we can empathize why it happens. Throw in children, financial responsibilities, religious conviction, and societal pressure into the mix, and it’s possible to understand why it happens.

 

Our Yearning for Connection

“How could she? She knew he was married! She’s a homewrecker.” The other woman always catches a ton of heat when affairs go down.

It’s easy to demonize the other woman. After all, why would any woman want to be with someone who is living a double life? It must be that their intentions are bad, because, why would they ever agree to be with someone they know is unable to fully commit?

Understand, too, that people who drive themselves into affairs are often master manipulators. They use guilt, flattery, humor, or whatever else it takes to capitalize on a woman’s weakness. Remember, people who take no thought of how infidelity will affect their faithful partner aren’t usually worried about a little emotional manipulation to get what they want.

 

The Other Woman and Her Six Human Needs

For decades, psychologists have preached about Maslow’s needs and how survival, safety, love, belonging, esteem, and self-realization drive everything we do. The motivations on why anyone, including the other woman, enters into an affair is no exception.

Other women have affairs because they want safety knowing exactly what their relationship is. They like knowing that whatever this “relationship” is, it can only go so far because he or she has someone waiting for them at home.

 

They enjoy the casualness of the affair because it gives them a bit of belonging but doesn’t get in the way of their journey towards self-realization.

 

Sometimes Affairs Fill a Need

 

Perhaps the person having an affair who they’re involved with offers them the companionship they’re seeking but unable to get elsewhere. Maybe the sex is great. Other times, an affair offers her a transactional human connection that doesn’t encroach on other parts of her life like a career, education, or some other form of personal development.

In our experience, women get caught up in affairs for several reasons. If you’ve had an affair before, you know that it doesn’t start with any sort of desire to destroy someone else’s life.

Usually, women accept the constraints of living in an affair because what they’re getting is filling a gaping need, even if what they’re receiving is shallow.

That doesn’t mean it’s acceptable, but knowing affairs happen for many reasons can help us be more fully aware of what it takes to sustain a loving, fulfilling relationship.

 

What It’s Like for the Other Woman

The other woman is an interesting role. It’s a role that doesn’t get a lot of attention because it goes against the popular narrative that women generally seek emotional connections before physical ones.

If that was the case, though, affairs would never happen because the other woman is often short changed when it comes to time and affection from the person they’re sleeping with.

It’s true, some women find themselves in affairs at low points in their lives when they’re willing to accept less than they deserve. That’s not always the case though. Some women love the thrill of flirting with danger, of tasting the forbidden fruit, being a little naughty.

After all, if the feeling is mutual with someone, you’re super attracted to, it’s very tempting. You get to go home by yourself without all the obligations and emotional baggage of a committed relationship. Your life is still very much yours. It can be pretty appealing for some people.

 

Dwindling Taboos Make Affairs Easier

It’s important to understand as well that life is different these days. The hookup culture that most of us have grown up with has meant fewer people are settling down. More people are ok with a bit of sex and personal connection without it overwhelming our lives.

The other woman is often someone who wants to have good sex, go out to a nice place on occasion, and have some fun without it getting in the way of their personal goals. Whether or not the person they’re sleeping with is having an affair is no business of theirs.

 

Lingering Hopes They’ll Change

A lot of other women get caught up waiting. They wait endlessly the person they’re involved with promises over and over again that they’re leaving their partner behind to be with them. When the promised deadline passes, they get a gift, an apology, and another promise it’ll happen soon.

When real feelings are involved, it’s easy for the other woman to view the spouse at home or wherever they are as the bad one. They’re abusive, manipulating, or holding the kids as leverage. All they have to do, they think, is wait for her out and the new couple can make a happy life together.

Realize, as well, that not all other women even know about the committed relationship their partner is in. Plenty of women have been lied to while the person they’re seeing is living a double life. All along they thought they just had to travel for work a bunch. There are, however, things you can do to spot an affair.

 

When It Ends

Just like normal relationships, affairs can end messily or amicably. It’s common for the other woman to feel a sense of relief after an affair. The longer the affair goes on, the heavier the emotional burden can get. Not having to worry about getting caught, when you can call, and all the other ‘rules’ in an affair can be freeing.

Perhaps the best lesson from non-consensual affairs we can take is that they help us better understand what we crave and what it takes to find something fulfilling.

You can get more free content on relationship and sex tips by checking out my Youtube Channel – The Sex Healer. 

If you know someone that would benefit from this information, feel free to share it. 

 

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists! 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems. 

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs. For clients hoping to take their intimate lives to the next level through personalized coaching on YOUR terms, learn more about our Text Therapy Program.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

Call or text us at 203-733-9600 or make an appointment.

Shave your pubic hair

To Shave or Not to Shave Your Pubic Hair

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To Shave or Not to Shave Your Pubic Hair  

 

Think twice before you laser or shave your pubic hair! 

If you have been wondering whether or not to shave your pubic hair entirely, trim it closely, or let it grow bushy, we are happy to tell you the trend is to do whatever makes you happy.

If you grew up before the late nineties, you may have gotten your first glimpse of a stranger’s naked body in an adult magazine. Remember, this was before the internet and the explosion of online porn. People sometimes had to learn the birds and the bees from printed publications or VHS tapes.

Back in the old days, the centerfolds laid out on the pages had a healthy bush. It was almost as if no one had ever heard of shaving pubic hair. Large tufts of pubic hair on all genders were in full effect.

For the past two decades, however, shaving has been in.

 

Smooth Sexy Parts

Many years ago, Brazilian wax salons started popping up all over the country. At first, we all giggled at the thought of ripping hair off vulvas, balls, and other body parts. Waxing scenes removing underarm hair, chest hair, and pubic hair played in movies and jokes between friends.

The no pubic hair trend caught fire and stuck. All you have to do is take a look at some popular porn sites to take sampling. Most of the videos feature people of all genders with no pubic hair.

So why did pubic hair removal become so popular? A lot of people prefer it, because they feel like it’s a cleaner look. You’re not worried about pubes poking out of a swimsuit or falling all over the bathroom floor. Others like how it gives a better view of what you’re working with down there.

Celebrity voices added to the popularity of the no-bush trend. Some have spoken out about their personal preference for laser hair removal and waxing. Even for celebrities who’ve remained silent, all you have to do is take a look at their social media posts in tight swimsuits to see they’re pubic hair-free.

 

Don’t Look Now, Yet Bush is Back!

Even though pubic hair removal is still extremely popular, having pubic hair is becoming less of a taboo. Before, if you had pubic hair, you’d probably get some heat for being lazy or sloppy. Now, however, it’s becoming a sort of personal statement.

We’ve all heard that fashion trends repeat. Could it be the same for pubic hair? Well, in the past few years, pubic hair is making somewhat of a comeback.

Shave your pubic hair

Pubic Hair (Photo Credits: Needpix)

As is usually the case, a trend starts when a small group of people decide they want to go against the crowd. They decide they don’t want to do what everyone else is doing. They want to stand out.

Eventually, people take notice and want to hop on the early beginnings of a trend. More and more people do it until whatever was popular in the beginning is hard to find at all. Then the cycle repeats.

The same is happening with shaving and other ways of pubic hair removal. The bush is creeping back into the mainstream. You can find it online in pornographic videos, pictures, and even in Hollywood productions.

Here are some of the most common NEGATIVE examples of why people shave:

  • They feel disgusted to kiss their partners after going down on them. 
  • Sometimes, partners refuse cunnilingus or intercourse with menstruating women or women with pubic hair. 
  • Joking about vulvas and vaginas smelling “like fish” or ejaculation is “gross” and “repulsive.”
  • Partners shave off their body hair because they state it smells bad and holds the sweat.

 

Tips for when you shave your pubic hair: 

Make sure you use an organic balm on the gentle skin of the pubic region. If you want to shave your pubic hair, just know that there will be some itching as it grows back. 

Test for allergies! I was using organic products for years, and then found out I was still allergic to some of the products themselves, not just the pesticides of the pharmacy brand version).

If you love that bare look of no hair, enjoy a fun slip and slide with a hairless partner! I know some people who actually tweeze or thread their pubic hair to get the smoothest sensation imaginable. Yes, this takes hours to do if you are tweezing.  

These are long-standing beliefs that keep our pleasure repressed, and keep us self-conscious instead. Find a happy medium for YOURSELF!

If you want bush, go for it. If you want to shave, go for it.

Or find a happy medium!

 

Keeping It Trim

An alternative for pleasure-enhancement is trimming! 

At my Betty Dodson BodySex weekend, one of the women came in Day 1 donning a beautiful bush and the next day, she trimmed and was equally joyful and orgasmic Day 2!

We haven’t made a full return to the glory days when huge bush was in style…

Now when pubic hair makes an appearance [in pornography], it’s often neatly trimmed. 

Closely-cropped pubic hair is easier to manage – there are fewer painful waxing or lasering sessions – and many individuals find this trimmed, “natural-state” highly desirable. 

 

Grooming Tips

Thankfully, personal grooming is easier than ever. There are widely available grooming shavers that are adjustable to match whatever length or shape you’re looking for. 

If you are thinking about letting your pubic hair make a comeback, start slowly. Buy a grooming tool that you can use to keep things trim and take it from there.

Shave your pubic hair

[Photo: Getty]

You still have a lot of choices in pubic grooming! 

There’s waxing, shaving, threading, laser hair removal, chemicals that remove hair and other forms of trimming. 

It’s not an “all or nothing” proposition when it comes to pubic hair.

 

Check out some LCAT Fan Favorites:

  • The best razor for a close shave without nicks
  • Shaving cream choice, especially for those with sensitive skin
  • Baby trimmer for those who have never done it
  • Body trimmer reported to prevent cutting
  • Multigroom series

If you are going to get a brazalian or an anal wax, make sure that the person you are going to has hygenic facilities and that they are experienced. This is not a place you want any infections. 

 

Body Positivity and Personal Preference

One of the best things about recent trends in pubic hair is the underlying support for personal preference when it comes to your body. We still have some ways to go, but the return of pubic hair and the debate over whether bald is better is becoming less about what’s “hot” and more about doing whatever you want concerning your body.

That sense of body sensitivity has sexual maturity, acceptance from sexual partners and even helped push choice feminism. 

With the reemergence of bushier pubic hair, women should feel less confined to a certain body image or personal grooming standards. 

Everyone has better sex when we feel good about our bodies.

More and more people, including people with large public followings, are proudly announcing their preference for the natural look. 

That may seem a bit trite, but it goes a long way to breaking down barriers. Sometimes, when public figures open the door to how many people feel, it’s easier for them to take the leap and make changes.

The trend, for now, remains overwhelmingly in favor of total hair removal or very limited pubic hair. However, the stigma of bushy or trimmed pubic hair on all genders is slowly fading away. That’s good news for everyone.

Some people do what their partner prefers. I would consider that choosing what makes you feel the most confident about your body is what matters. 

 

Can You Go Back if You’ve Done Laser Hair Removal?

What about people who chose laser hair removal to permanently remove their pubic hair? 

A few years ago, they were so sure they’d never want pubic hair again. 

The trend is changing, though, and so are some people’s minds.

With laser hair removal, your pubic hair may not be completely gone forever, and it’s likely that hair that grows back will be lighter, thinner, and that there will be fewer of them.

Believe it or not, in recent years, some medical facilities have started performing hair transplants on people – for those balding, those who want a fuller bush, or those who regret past laser hair removal. 

The procedures are expensive and are by no means mainstream, yet if the trend towards pubic hair continues, expect there to be more developments here.

Still, even with the potential for hair removal reversal, permanent laser removal should be something you consider at length. 

Focus instead on feeling good about your body and taking small steps to find out what works best for you.

 

 

Are you ready to learn more and unlock a more satisfying experience?

BLISS: Proven Methods for Improving the Female Orgasm

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

Oral Sex for Woman

The Art of Oral Sex For Women or Those With Vulvas

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The Art of Oral Sex For Women or Those With Vulvas

 

Some individals seem concerned when performing oral sex for women or on those with vulvas! 

Can you imagine how successfully brainwashed we are that we believe there is something extra dirty or wrong with them, simply because they are internal. 

Most women who perform oral sex on women report that they love to give it. 

Oral Sex For Woman

Yet, many discuss how difficult it is for those who are raised as girls to be patient in a world of consumerism and productivity. 

In the past ten years of therapy, I have heard thousands of stories where individuals of all socioeconomic backgrounds, race, ethnicities, education levels, socioeconomic status, and ability were telling me that their is something incredibly taboo about providing oral sex on the labia.

I have been blessed with wonderful sexual education thanks to Betty Dodson and my professor, Jim Moorhead. 

 

Educate Yourself! 

If you ever feel that your labia isn’t normal, I suggest looking at a variety of lips. 

If you are concerned about the smell of your genitals, remember that many people enjoy the scent of sexual organs.

Your feelings of disgust or shame around your bits may just be conditioning of society, family, your religion, or your limited exposure to the world of pleasure. 

Go under the feels of “yuck” and see if there is any part of you that can show up and receive the compliment or the gift of pleasure. 

 

Discuss Which One of Your 6 Need Is Being Met! 

Oral Sex For Woman

Examples: 

::ask your sexual partner PRIOR to giving or receiving oral sex, so that your mind can relax:: 

Can you tell me  like how it looks and how it smells. 

Validation from a partner is probably more helpful than anything you can read in my blog! 

If both of you are concerned with genital odors, try to incorporate a shower as part of the foreplay and aftercare (and, if there is a “significant odor,” and you have the privilege of affording healthcare, go to a trusted ob-gyn or a local Planned Parenthood to get checked for bacterial vaginosis).

While going down on your partner or giving oral sex, make sure you ask your partner what feels good. 

  • Get an idea of the pressure that works, the spot that is most sensitive, and what does not feel good. 
  • Make sure as the giver and the receiver, that your body is in a comfortable position. 
  • If you need to move your partner, then do so. 
  • If you have long hair, tie it out of your face. 
  • Kneel along the side of the bed if you have to. You CAN find ways to incorporate this for all body shapes and abilities. 

 

Check in Again With Your Partner Before Going In and Touching Them.

Reassure them of what mental state you are in, what your desires are, what your needs are. 

Discuss in feelings, needs, and utilizing parts cards if possible! 

Note to everyone involved, as you can receive oral sex from multiple partners at one time. 

Be sure that you are not focusing on what you look like and focus on your pleasure receiving, or you are focused on your partner’s experience while giving. 

Give positive feedback to your partner about how you are enjoying this experience. 

Verbally, with sounds, with smiles! Ask if they like dirty talk, talk about fantasies, if they want a different type of sensual touch instead of just the oral touch of mouth to vulva. 

Communicate and experiment with an open mind. The brain is the most important organ in sexual pleasure!

If You Are Nervous As The Receiver, Here Are Some Mantras To Practice: 

  •   I let myself to experience pleasure;
  •   I allow my sexual selves to appear;
  •   I am worthy of sexual satisfaction and connection;
  •   I am opening my life to positive sexual experiences;
  •   I feel seen in my expression of sexuality;
  •   The more I experience my own understanding of my inner parts, the more I can communicate and direct my language to the part my partner is requesting of me. 

Receiving oral sex is about the sensual art of receiving, accepting, creating, exploring, releasing, and intuitiveness. 

 

How and When To Talk To Your Partner About Changing Their Oral Sex Technique 

female anatomy

There is no “magic way” to be comfortable with the words coming out of your mouth so that your partner may hear of judge you based on what you said about sexuality. 

What I can say is that the more your practice and acknowledge that it may be uncomfortable or difficult to talk about, the more confident you can get in this type of intimate compassionate communication and conversation style. 

One partner may be more willing to engage in conversations around sex than the other, which is actually normal! 

 

Quick Tips To Address In The Moment:

  • If your partner is not hitting the right spot on your clit or is missing your clit entirely, you can say things like, “Up a little” or “To the right a little.”
  • You can adjust your body so you are in the right position. Partners, please note that if a woman adjusts her body while you are touching her, do not move your hand or mouth. Ask if she is squirming with pleasure or if she wants to move. 
  • When your partner does hit the right spot, provide positive reinforcement, like, “YES!” or “It feels so good. Stay right there,” or “YAY! This is amazing. Keep doing that.”

 

Communicating during a Sexual Encounter:

Old Way: “Stop. You always try to have sex with me too quickly.”

New Way: “It would be so hot if you touched me gently right now. I like when you tease me a little bit more before you touch my clit.”

 

Communicating outside of a Sexual  Encounter:

Old Way:  “It hurts when you have sex with me.”

New Way: “Our sex is great, and sometimes it hurts. Can we add more foreplay and lubricant before we have sex? I think if we focused on 20 minutes of body pleasure prior to penetrative sex, I could physically be engaged more. Is that of interest to you?”

 

 

Are you ready to learn more and unlock a more satisfying experience?

BLISS: Proven Methods for Improving the Female Orgasm

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

My Naked Female Weekend with Betty Dodson and Carlin Ross

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The following may contain a story and images of intimacy and pleasure in the body (including what is viewed by LCAT as tasteful). You have a choice to continue reading, as we value our community and your right to agree to read this information. Our core beliefs are confidentiality, integrity, respect of all beings, and consent on all levels.

My Naked Female Weekend with Betty Dodson and Carlin Ross – Pleasure is Healing

 

On July 14, 2013, I met Betty Dodson for the first time. She hugged me, whispered “you’re a very naughty girl…I like you” to me, and then slapped my ass. Life was good. 

Have you ever heard of Betty Dodson? If not, have you ever heard of a vibrator? 

Betty Dodson

Carlin Ross, Amanda Pasciucco and Betty Dodson

If yes, consider saying “thank you” to Betty Dodson!

Betty put the vibrator on the “map” for women’s sexual pleasure, and the movement that she began decades ago has changed sexuality for the better! 

Betty Dodson is not only a sexologist and the author of Sex For One (it sold over a million copies) and Orgasms for Two, she is a phenomenal artist. 

Soon, she will have some of her work in an exhibition at The Museum of Sex in New York City. 

If you would like to see some of Betty’s illustrations, you can find them here. 

A few months ago, I realized that Betty is 90 years old, and I had yet to attend one of her events. 

I wanted to see Betty and her “right-hand woman,” Carlin Ross, in action! 

Immersing myself in Betty and Carlin’s energy for the first time in six years didn’t feel scary or intimidating to me. It almost felt like “coming home” while attending Dodson and Ross’ BodySex Weekend.

 

What Is BodySex? 

The best description I can come up with for BodySex is a sacred, two-day weekend workshop where women overcome their body shame and/or past traumas by practicing sensual pleasure. 

Carlin says that “Betty developed these workshops using the consciousness raising model of second wave feminism where women got together and shared their experience first person.” 

 

How does it work? 

A group of more than 10 women from all over the WORLD come to learn from Betty and Carlin about their bodies, their orgasms, all while feeling the strong bond of sisterhood. 

This event is for women only.

The first thing you do when you walk into the BodySex event is take off all of your clothing. 

I was greeted by the lovely Ms. Ross, who I had met six years ago, and who still remembered me, by name. I smiled and felt honored, because Carlin and Betty are such heroes to me. 

Women who spend their days teaching other women about pleasure has enabled me to live my life in exactly the way I want. Since I was 19, I was able to choose the profession I chose, because of the Sexual Revolution that Betty Dodson began.

We sat in a circle for two days (for a total of 10 hours), without any clothing, without any men, and we were led through the following practices by two Fearless Women:

  • Conversation on Cultural Body Messages
  • Vulva Show and Tell for all Participants
  • Erotic Recess Focused on Pleasure
  • Group Massage Focused on Non-Sexual Touch

I believe that all women can gain something from this experience. 

Sitting in the nude isn’t comfortable for everyone when they begin. But, by the end of Day 2, after sharing your genitals and your pleasure with the other women, I am uncertain how anyone leaves without making LIFELONG friends! 

 

Change occurs when you do something new!

 

Take Away Messages

1. If you are a woman struggling to orgasm, go to BodySex. It will change your life.

  • By spending time with other women, especially other vulnerable, Bad-Ass women, your view of female bodies, orgasm, competition, and internal narratives begin to change. 
  • The idea that multiple women went in disliking their vulvas, and most did not know how to appreciate them (Day 1) and then left (Day 2) feeling pleasure and connection is MIRACULOUS! 
  • In 10 hours, Betty and Carlin undo YEARS of sexual shame and cultural fear that women’s bodies are “not enough.” 

2. Women are GORGEOUS! Especially, women in their pleasure!  

  • The entire woman, including her VULVA, is beautiful. 
  • If you had to match a face to a vulva, you probably could NOT do it! 
  • One of my favorite quotes from the weekend is that “P–sy is fresh, no matter what age.” 
  • When you aren’t looking at sex from the lens of pornography, there is much more to enjoy and experience. 

3. Many successful women are having children after the age of 40. 

  • For those of you who struggle with choosing between children and your career, I just want to share that I met multiple women this weekend who had babies after age 40. 
  • Until this weekend, I had never been in a room where women were willing to talk about the connection between their bodies, fertility and motherhood. 

I witnessed multiple women orgasm for the first time in their lives, and it was SO beautiful to share that with them. 

I believe ALL individuals can be healed from learning the beauty of their own pleasure. Just like Betty and Carlin’s tagline and mission “Better orgasms. Better world.”

 

Are you ready to learn more and unlock a more satisfying experience?

BLISS: Proven Methods for Improving the Female Orgasm

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

female anatomy

Female Anatomy – Become A Sexpert

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Female Anatomy – Become A Sexpert

 

You, like everyone, need to learn a bit more about Female Anatomy. This is one of my favorite topics to teach on – it never gets old!

Actually, it was so great that I wrote a whole book – called Playtime on it – for young women.

By better understanding female anatomy, you or your partner will be better prepared to enjoy sex to the fullest.

 

“Knowledge will set you free!”

 

This quote from Socrates tells us to be aware of the reality and the knowledge of this can change your current state. So, let’s talk about my favorite topic – your sexual enlightenment.

I will give you a simple, yet very thorough lesson about women’s anatomy. You will learn how to identify each anatomical part and its function. This knowledge can help you have optimal sex.

Female anatomy and learning how to use it to super charge your orgasm is something women enjoy! The parts of the female anatomy – the vulva, the labia, the internal clitoris, and the vagina all matter – in addition to the pelvic floor tissue, the G spot, and the anus. Learn more about your body in a comprehensive sex education type of way!

 

If you have questions on the women’s anatomy, feel free to let us know! We will do our best to provide more information!

 

Are you ready to learn more and unlock a more satisfying experience?

BLISS: Proven Methods for Improving the Female Orgasm

 

 

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) PhD, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), and an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do. 

 

breast cancer and pleasure

Sex After Breast Cancer

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Sex After Breast Cancer

I often get asked by my female clients for alternative ways to get aroused during sex after breast cancer. They have little or no feeling in their nipples due to breast cancer or other types of breast surgery.

 

I have heard more than 100 women discuss changes in sensitivity around the nipple and breast, which impacts sex after breast cancer and even breastfeeding.

 

There is A LOT happening emotionally and spiritually while undergoing breast surgery and recovery.

 

The chest is an interesting body part for women, as it holds the heart and the breasts! It’s such a tender and vulnerable spot.

 

breast

 

After breast cancer surgery, many women indicate they do not feel ‘womanly’ anymore. Some feel they aren’t good enough. This is because they don’t like how they fill out their shirts, or they have unappealing scars, or they don’t get aroused easily. This creates anxiety and insecurity in their sex life.

 

Tips and Lessons Learned From My Clients for Sex After Breast Cancer (if your nipples aren’t sensitive anymore): 

  1. Identify your breast sensitivity: no sensation, minimal sensation, due to technique or something else.
  2. Talk to your doctor if you need to understand the cause
  3. Find another part of your body that is sensitive. Try the lower back and down the sides of the body. Go from your neck, around the chest, and down the rib cage (towards the belly). Once you find other areas that are sensitive have your partner touch you there.
  4. Reclaim your chest by either piercing your nipples or tattooing over surgery scars. 
  5. Incorporate other toys on the nipples, like nipple clamps, vibrators, or floggers (whips) to get a different feeling on the chest.
  6. Do a sexy photo shoot to reclaim your beauty.
  7. Do a mourning ritual for the chest you used to have so you can grieve and move on!

 

If you have had breast cancer or reconstruction, or possibly breast implants or breast reductions, how have you dealt with the feelings of insecurity, pain, embarrassment, etc.?  Please comment below, we would love to hear from you!

 

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a relationship coaching and sex therapy practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible, multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systemically-trained and licensed therapists!

 

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help Millennials and Baby Boomers alike who visit us for a variety of relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

 

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your relationship and ignite your sex life at What We Do. Call or text us at 203-733-9600, or make an appointment.

 

 

breast cancer

 

 

Female Orgasm

Female Orgasm: Seven Areas of Pleasure

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Female Orgasm: Seven Areas of Pleasure

 

female orgasm

There are many areas of female orgasm, and each are delicious ways of experiencing pleasure.

Today we are speaking to those who have vulvas, not just those who identify as females, because all are welcome here!

An orgasm is the body’s response to receiving sexual stimulation from intimate encounters, caresses or intercourse.

For all people. blood accumulates in the genital area during the sexual stimulation process, and it is released when the bodily function of orgasm occurs.

Orgasms are accompanied by a series of sensations that often produce intense pleasure and feelings of sexual satisfaction, adrenaline, oxytocin, and other feel good hormones! 

If I didn’t mention the power of the brain and imagination in orgasm, I would be doing us all a disservice. Meaning, you have to be turned on in your mind. So, psychosexual therapy exercises may help if this doesn’t make any sense to you!

After you get warmed up, come join us in the seven areas of female orgasms! 

1. Sex for One or More! Clitoral Pleasure in Female Orgasm

This is the most favored area to achieve female orgasm thanks to 8,000 nerve endings. The clitoris is designed to give pleasure and 80% of women report needing direct stimulation of the clitoral glands to have an orgasm.

The sensation is often localized, sharp, powerful, and quick in duration.

Rubbing, oral sex, the use of sex toys or certain postures that favor the friction of the pubis are ways to trigger clitoris stimulation.

2. Entering the Vagina

The walls of the vagina have thousands of nerves that require a patient stimulation rhythm to achieve orgasm. The thing is that the vagina doesn’t have the same amount of pleasure that comes from the areas where the clitoris is involved. Meaning, this is likely due to minimize pain. 

3. Cervical Pleasure

This type of orgasm takes its name from the cervix, which is the female reproductive organ that connects with the uterus. The cervix is three centimeters long and 2.5 centimeters in diameter. First, understand where your cervix is located. Then, instruct your partner to massage it with strokes. Consider “doggy style” sex position, because penetration is deep.

4. A-Spot Pleasure

The A-spot orgasm is found in the vagina and creates more intense female orgasms – even multiples! The A spot or Anterior Fornix Erogenous (AFE) zone, was reported to be found in the 90’s by Malaysian doctor, Chua Chee Ann.

It is located above the G spot about 7.5 centimeters from the entrance of the vagina, and on the anterior side, near the cervix.

If you want to explore finding it, sexual positions with penetration from behind, or the missionary position of the jackhammer will help! 

5. The Famous G-Spot

 

Try the following to find your G spot:

  1. Insert a finger into the vagina.
  2. Feel for the front wall (the side where the navel is located).
  3. Move your finger around until you find a spot that feels different when you press or rub it.
  4. If you feel the urge to urinate, do not be concerned – this is normal and it’s a good sign.

The most unique aspect of a G spot orgasm is that it can be accompanied by female ejaculation, which is completely normal.

The urethra releases the ejaculation fluid, and it contains prostatic acid phosphatase (PAP)! 

6. The “U-Spot”

The U spot is located at the entrance to the urethra (located just above the vaginal orifice in the middle of the lips).

Many women enjoy a gentle stimulation in this area with fingers and tongue. 

7. Full-Body Orgasms

Full-body orgasms occur when a female orgasms throughout her entire body. We recommend full-body orgasms as often as possible! Especially during the same sexual session.

This type of pleasure happens the more you love and the more you know your body!  If you need tips on how to experience sexual nirvana, we can help! 

The skin is a great source of pleasure – for everyone. The mind as well! 

Explore by yourself or with your partner, and the greater your chances will become of achieving pleasure from multiple areas!

Are you ready to learn more and unlock a more satisfying experience?

Get your copy of Bliss: Proven Solutions for Improving the Female O

Get Bliss: Proven Methods for Improving Female O

Sex Therapy Videos Female Orgasm Video Therapy

About Life Coaching and Therapy

Life Coaching and Therapy (LCAT) is a therapy and coaching practice that transforms our clients lives through our flexible. Multi-technique approach and pleasure-skills training provided by systematically-trained and licensed therapists!

Get to know our founder and owner, Amanda Pasciucco, (a.k.a. The Sex Healer) a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT). And an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist (CST) that has developed innovative therapy programs and therapy videos that get results.

Our team of compassionate, licensed therapists and certified sex therapists help all clients who visit us for a variety of personal, relationship, intimacy and sex problems.

LCAT provides on-site appointments, as well as video chat and text therapy programs.

Learn more about how LCAT can help improve your life at What We Do.